Leo man just wants to pleasure me no reciprocation

I (Libra,29)have a close Leo(40) friend. We met at a train station and he initiated a convo with me and we swapped numbers as he just moved to my town.

Since then over a course of a year, we’ve been in frequent contact with each other and also meeting up for nights out with his pals. We get on so well and enjoy each other’s company.

He’s told me explicitly that he likes me and he’s interested in me. As he has kids with two different women I told I’m not too keen on dating someone with kids. I want to start a family of my own with someone that It’ll be there first time too. I’m abstinent at the moment till I meet someone who I want to commit to in the long term and marry. We’ve had convos about this and he’s been a sort of counsellor when I’ve told him about my woes and advising me about the dating game.

He’s not looking for a relationship himself as the last one did a number on him which he recently talked to me about and I understand why he’s in that headspace. So he has a couple of women that he talks to on the side but none official(otherwise I would t be entertaining this)

Recently I was at his place where he was giving me a massage and one thing led to another and he’s hands up ended up down there. But that was all,we didn’t go on to have sex. I’ve told him clearly I don’t want to have sex, I’m waiting for the right person. He said he understands, he’s happy with an arrangement of just pleasuring(going down on me etc) me and we don’t have to have sex. I told him lm not sure if I’m comfortable with that because I like giving back pleasure and don’t wanna put us both in a place of non-reciprocation. He’s adamant that he doesent mind. Every time I’m with him, he just wants to down on me.

I’ve asked him what does this do for him because he’s so insistent that this continues. His response is that it’s giving him what needs and enjoys it.

Has any of you been in this position before, if so why or in what circumstance would this occur?

I’m trying to rap my head around it but still struggling.

I'm the kind of guy who would do this. If there was someone I was really into and a relationship wasn't on the table, I'd still be her friend, and I'd would be more then open to being just lovers and intimate with her, even if just short to full sex. I would also continue to support her as a friend like he does with you. With the naughty stuff, it's not lust per sa ,Im after the intamcy and connection the act brings (also it's fun🙂) BUT here is the thing......I AM NOT NORMAL and not everyone can handle mixing like that. Just enjoying things for what they are and naturally handle the feelings people catch.

Actually, I'm sure you already have feelings for each other. You are not confused, you are conflicted. There is a difference.

Unless you are both the free spirited type, and serious about your goal, this will snowball. And you know it. Accept that.

Put your mental gymnastics aside by using this technic. I want you to pretend this isn't you but a very close dear friend that you really love. You want what's best for her and her happiness.

1. Ask her how important is this saving yourself for a serious relationship. What's her reasons for doing it this way?

2. Talks to multiple woman Im guessing sleeping with them too, and 2 baby's mama.

She talks about wanting a family of her own and...( his first time too?)

Leo man here. I've kinda been there recently with a woman who's at the crossroads in her life; not ready to enter a new relationship and not the casual sex type... but can't quite resist our chemistry either. So for a while there our dates consisted solely of heavy makeout sessions and me just constantly eating her out, lol.

It was nice. Pleasuring her gave me pleasure. I never thought "when's this bytch gonna pay me back" bc I love going down on women. It's not a means to and end, but satisfying in itself. We've moved to more advanced stuff since, tho.



Do you know his other placements btw?

Oh shit, other guys are this way too?

Pleasure for pleasures sake.

Lol nm guess I'm normal.

Well damn.. my Leo mom always thought a Leo man is the only person who can lock me down. Now I think I believe her.

Posted by Moon4

Posted by Mutya
Well damn.. my Leo mom always thought a Leo man is the only person who can lock me down. Now I think I believe her.

Leos and libras should not date, it's not gonna work. -Tiziani

click to expand

I don't think a male Libra can handle a female Leo. The other way works better. Besides both are supposedly rather superficial and natural flirts so if anything it's a match of temperaments

Posted by Lostthoughts
I'm the kind of guy who would do this. If there was someone I was really into and a relationship wasn't on the table, I'd still be her friend, and I'd would be more then open to being just lovers and intimate with her, even if just short to full sex. I would also continue to support her as a friend like he does with you. With the naughty stuff, it's not lust per sa ,Im after the intamcy and connection the act brings (also it's fun🙂) BUT here is the thing......I AM NOT NORMAL and not everyone can handle mixing like that. Just enjoying things for what they are and naturally handle the feelings people catch.

Actually, I'm sure you already have feelings for each other. You are not confused, you are conflicted. There is a difference.

Unless you are both the free spirited type, and serious about your goal, this will snowball. And you know it. Accept that.

Put your mental gymnastics aside by using this technic. I want you to pretend this isn't you but a very close dear friend that you really love. You want what's best for her and her happiness.

1. Ask her how important is this saving yourself for a serious relationship. What's her reasons for doing it this way?

2. Talks to multiple woman Im guessing sleeping with them too, and 2 baby's mama.

She talks about wanting a family of her own and...( his first time too?)

Yeah definitely would say conflicted. If it were to end I would hope we can still be friends

Posted by Moon4

Posted by Mutya
Well damn.. my Leo mom always thought a Leo man is the only person who can lock me down. Now I think I believe her.

Leos and libras should not date, it's not gonna work. -Tiziani

click to expand

How comes?

Posted by Stardustmopped
I had this with a Virgo under pretty similar circumstances. We really liked each other but both were hung up on our exes and not ready to be vulnerable. It ended badly.

Why do you think it ended badly?

Posted by Moon4

Posted by Mutya
Well damn.. my Leo mom always thought a Leo man is the only person who can lock me down. Now I think I believe her.

Leos and libras should not date, it's not gonna work. -Tiziani

click to expand

It depends on their other placements. I click with leos both men and women. Plus they're my number one travel partners and I love to travel. 🧳✈️🌞👙

A Leo bowing down to a Libra. What a rarity. But I'm sure that's not the first time of this magnitude.

Err I feel for you having this kind of problem 🙃

Does he also bring you gifts and pay for dinner?

Oh dearie me - what a dilemma 😂

Posted by Timone

Posted by Moon4

Posted by Mutya
Well damn.. my Leo mom always thought a Leo man is the only person who can lock me down. Now I think I believe her.

Leos and libras should not date, it's not gonna work. -Tiziani

click to expand

It depends on their other placements. I click with leos both men and women. Plus they're my number one travel partners and I love to travel. 🧳✈️🌞👙

click to expand

Your number one travel partner is a cat

Posted by GeminiKing
Err I feel for you having this kind of problem 🙃

Does he also bring you gifts and pay for dinner?

Oh dearie me - what a dilemma 😂

Haha, I’m just trying to understand from a man’s perspective why they would want to engage in this dynamic

Posted by VenusStellium7
A Leo bowing down to a Libra. What a rarity. But I'm sure that's not the first time of this magnitude.

Are you saying it’s usually the opposite ?

Posted by Stardustmopped

Posted by Librastar568

Posted by Stardustmopped
I had this with a Virgo under pretty similar circumstances. We really liked each other but both were hung up on our exes and not ready to be vulnerable. It ended badly.

Why do you think it ended badly?
click to expand

Because we developed insane chemistry and people started to notice and make comments and it got into our heads. He started trying to make me jealous. He tried to make it work with his ex and I backed off but then he was spending more time with me than her and she noticed. It was a push pull situation where we were never on the same page. When I was making an effort he was too nonchalant and then when he would pursue I didn’t trust him. We both eventually wanted something meaningful but kept missing the opportunity to align our intentions with each other.

I think we made the mistake of thinking that without penetrative sex there wouldn’t be any vulnerability, but there was actually more. It’s more intimate to be face to face with someone’s genitals. It’s a deeper sense of exposure and trust.

click to expand

I was actually saying this the other day, it’s definitely still vulnerable and intimate even without the PIV aspect. I can already see it’s changing our friendship dynamic, even though it’s beneficial to me I still don’t mind if we stop now to prevent it going down the toxic route but obvs can’t take away what we’ve experienced.

I dealt with a Virgo in the past and we were constantly at loggerheads,it was hard to communicate etc. adding a complicated relationship status into the mix it was a recipe for a disaster.

Posted by Librastar568

Posted by GeminiKing
Err I feel for you having this kind of problem 🙃
Does he also bring you gifts and pay for dinner?
Oh dearie me - what a dilemma 😂

Haha, I’m just trying to understand from a man’s perspective why they would want to engage in this dynamic

click to expand

Typical Libra overthinking everything

Posted by GeminiKing

Posted by Timone

Posted by Moon4

Posted by Mutya
Well damn.. my Leo mom always thought a Leo man is the only person who can lock me down. Now I think I believe her.

Leos and libras should not date, it's not gonna work. -Tiziani
click to expand

It depends on their other placements. I click with leos both men and women. Plus they're my number one travel partners and I love to travel. 🧳✈️🌞👙



click to expand

Your number one travel partner is a cat

click to expand

Haha well I always visit them wherever I go. 😽😺

I used to keep this a secret, but I don't care anymore. All the fixed signs (Taurus, Leo, Scorpio, and Aquarius) though I don't think Aquarius actually cares enough, just want to pleasure you for the gain of control. And the the more water the placement have in their chart, the worse it gets. That's a concept though isn't it? Like how can pleasuring someone be a huge red flag of control— Well let me tell you, anyone who wants to fully pleasure you, wants to control you. There I said it. Immersion broken. It is true though, especially with Leo and Scorpio. See the fact is, we like to pleasure you as deep and intensity as possible. Because not only does it fuel our ego, but it also lets us gain control over you sexually. I mean this in a consensual manner also, so don't try to make me seem like an uncool guy. To me taking full advantage of someone isn't fun. It's like playing a game with cheats enabled. I'm a true vampire that needs your full consent before I can enter. That is literally the mindset of Leo and Scorpio energy. If you hit me up 2 years later just trying to chat, I know it worked. And it's all because I wanted to fully and completely pleasure you. These energies can be sexual vampires, and if you think you've encountered one you need to completely leave them asap no matter how good the sex is.

Posted by Soul
I used to keep this a secret, but I don't care anymore. All the fixed signs (Taurus, Leo, Scorpio, and Aquarius) though I don't think Aquarius actually cares enough, just want to pleasure you for the gain of control. And the the more water the placement have in their chart, the worse it gets. That's a concept though isn't it? Like how can pleasuring someone be a huge red flag of control— Well let me tell you, anyone who wants to fully pleasure you, wants to control you. There I said it. Immersion broken. It is true though, especially with Leo and Scorpio. See the fact is, we like to pleasure you as deep and intensity as possible. Because not only does it fuel our ego, but it also lets us gain control over you sexually. I mean this in a consensual manner also, so don't try to make me seem like an uncool guy. To me taking full advantage of someone isn't fun. It's like playing a game with cheats enabled. I'm a true vampire that needs your full consent before I can enter. That is literally the mindset of Leo and Scorpio energy. If you hit me up 2 years later just trying to chat, I know it worked. And it's all because I wanted to fully and completely pleasure you. These energies can be sexual vampires, and if you think you've encountered one you need to completely leave them asap no matter how good the sex is.

Thanks for sharing & It’s interesting that you say that because I believe energy should be reciprocated which is why I initially didn’t feel comfortable with the arrangement. He wears layers of clothes to not get aroused, which is extreme , I’ve said I’m comfortable with us not having to do this but he still wants to. What are some ways to know if they are a sexual vampire?

Posted by Librastar568

Posted by VenusStellium7
A Leo bowing down to a Libra. What a rarity. But I'm sure that's not the first time of this magnitude.

Are you saying it’s usually the opposite ?

click to expand

What was generally read about astrology is that the Libra kisses up to Leo a lot. Which is ridiculous because I have never glazed a single Leo in my life lol

Wait, you don't feel he's the right one... He has kids.. and you don't want someone who has em already.... You wouldn't "entertain" him if he was seriously interested in another woman?

I mean your friendship isn't a friendship. It's a give-and-takeship of attention and sexual energy. You may not think you're giving anything but you're just spreading yourself out like a deli going "as long as I don't do anything back" and he's fully invested. You are giving him something, you. Bon appetite. No judgment just thoughts

29 libra female myself.

Also there are plenty of us that would rather devour than be devoured. I love eating men