After heartbreak.. How do you let your guard down?

Last year at this time I went through a really bad heartbreaking situation.. Unrequited love at its best... I'm still struggling to let my guard down with anyone.. I feel like it pushes people away.. After heartbreak how do you work on letting your guard down and let someone new in?

well if it's been a year now , it's definitely time to jump back in the water . You know us Leebs kinda need that partnership , in fact a new relationship will help you to forget about the one that gave you heartbreak

I've been trying I just can't open up like I did w that guy. I feel like I'm missing something when I'm single and I'm tired of it. Gaaahhhh. Maybe the new guy isn't the right one. The guy I loved was a gem this new guy is a cancer. The Gemini was Soo open and communicated everything the good the bad the ugly he talked about it. The cancer doesn't talk about feelings. But I strangely feel connected to him. I just am having an extremely hard time opening up to him.

hunney Cancer & Libra ? Oh Boy there's the problem !! water signs are the WOST for Libras

of course there are exceptions but its gonna be alot of work

Opening up after a really bad breakup takes time, it's a leap of faith. But your last relationship was a learning experience. Take what you learned from last time. Don't do or say anything this time around that you won't be able to get over. Remember this time to curb your thoughts, or actions so that whatever you put out, you can live with it.

Keep it light for a while, have fun. No ones pressing you to jump into a relationship, and of so, don't listen.

O so hard.... I like this guy and i know he likes me but i am having a hard time believing in men right now.. I keep thinking he is probably living a double life or something wtf... My damn logical mind fighting with my heart

Posted by libnicole84
O so hard.... I like this guy and i know he likes me but i am having a hard time believing in men right now.. I keep thinking he is probably living a double life or something wtf... My damn logical mind fighting with my heart

It's funny, I've been a bit like that lately. I seem to attract married men for some reason (won't go there!) and now I assume they are ALL married. LOL. I guess all we can do is give them the time and space to prove their worth. You dont' have to open up right away, and not doing so may make you seem more mysterious!!

I have a feeling the mystery of me is keeping him interested haha

Really?? Seems that Libra is just doomed when it comes to relations. I have given up and wont really entertain the idea of being with a man again..only in my mind. I make all men my friends and I can tell that they cant stand that..I am not giving up any type of affection, just like I would be with any other friend. I am also taking it very, very slow. Watching paint dry. LOL

whats your chart look like lucky star?

Zodiac in degrees Placidus Orb:0
Sun Libra Ascendant Libra
Moon Capricorn II Libra
Mercury Libra III Scorpio
Venus Scorpio IV Capricorn
Mars Sagittarius V Aquarius
Jupiter Capricorn VI Pisces
Saturn Scorpio VII Aries
Uranus Sagittarius VIII Aries
Neptune Sagittarius IX Taurus
Pluto Scorpio Midheaven Cancer
Lilith Aries XI Leo
Asc node Taurus XII Virgo

the cancer guy i talk to is scorp moon gemini venus

Oh I'm sorry Luckystar , I did'nt realise you had all of that water in your chart . I can get along with Cancer once I am aware that someone is Cancer. Once I know , I am 'extra gentle' to the Cancer and it usually works . The world might be a better place if we had our charts tattooed on our foreheads ! LOL

Luckystar. W your moon in cap n Venus in scorp how do you express your feelings? I'm more of a show you type of person but I think the cancer is thinking I don't feel the same for him. Guess I should just come out and verbally express it?

Yea I do! I flipped a couple times haha. Then he acts like I have no reason to feel the way I feel he backs off for a little n comes back. I've known him for a year now it's a slow process but slowly I can tell he's coming around. I just wish we communicated about feelings more. He's so sweet. It's just hard because he lives 2 hrs away but he is from where I live and his family is here so I think he's trying to see if he wants to mov back. But since we both show feelings through affection when we aren't around eachother I think we both question things. I feel like such a wuss haha. I feel like he plays games like that too sometimes...

The harder you focus on "finding someone" the harder it is going to be to run into someone that is relationship material for you.

I went through a break up myself 3 months ago (we were together for almost 3 years)and after the mourning phase (for me just a couple of weeks) I just decided I was feeling great being single again so I wasnt looking for anyone in particular after that, just started meeting more girls, filled my head with positive thoughts, surrounded myself with positive situations, had a few one-night stands, partied a lot, drank a lot, in other words..I just wanted to have fun.

I was having the time of my life and still didnt feel like getting into serious relationships again. About 5 weeks ago at a social event, unexpectedly I met a very special girl, the chemistry was instant and mutual right from the beginning, Im sure the fact that I was feeling so comfortable in my skin made everything smoother too, because we ended up kissing only a few weeks after that. When you're happy with yourself..people pick up on that and you somehow attract the right kind of people. Its a win-win situation. Even though this girl and I are still not in a commited relationship, we are kind of heading that way, slowly but surely 🙂

Be genuinely happy with yourself first, the rest will come naturally after that.

And let your intuition dictate your decisions a little more often, logical debates in your own head trying to decide if someone is right for you or not will only make you more confused.

Trust your spirit.

Id like that post if it were an option haha.. I have been single for over a year and did the party thing and all that... I actually didnt take this guy serious when i first met him i didnt even know his name he just gave me his number and i assumed i'd never see him again. He found me on facebook and slowly we have been hanging out.. I didnt even want to get feelings for him they just built over this time... Buuuttt the logical part of my brain is what is making me struggle.. I wanna just go with the flow but my brain analyzes every damn thing

I know that for you as an air sign it could be harder to stop the flux of constant ideas/thoughts, but seriously..quiet your mind. "When you cease to strive to understand then you will know without understanding"

Hi Everyone,

Love the comments and I agree it takes time. TIME. And yes you get lonely. LONELY. LOL. But here is the thing. I was in two relationships one with a Cancer and one with a Libra and they both went VERY VERY BAD. Cancers can be very selfish as the Cancer left me to raise a kid on my own. So I know about heartbreak and moving on. And honestly as cliche as it sounds take the time to heal. Heal properly and heal completely before getting into a relationship. Look honestly at the relationship see why it went wrong your mistakes + faults as well as the other persons. Forgive yourself for allowing certain things to happen and understand why you allowed them to happen and you will find that you will learn and more importantly grow.

The current relationship I am in has been with a Libra we will be together for six years in February. (Yes it happens it is wonderful - ALL relationships need work no matter what sign). And I almost lost him - not because of astrological signs but because I had no faith in the male species. I was still hurt. I was not aware of the part I played in the painful relationships and I never gave myself the chance to heal and I took it out on this wonderful guy.

So take your time. Look at yourselves and ask what is it about me that would allow such things to happen or put up with? Take resonsibility for your part it is the most FREEING thing you can do because the power that these exes have because they still have power of you is coming from you not letting go of something or ways.

More importantly have faith and confidence in yourself to say that I am a wonderful, beautiful women that deserves a great guy that has the following character traits. Be able to say you are aware of your own character flaws and make the commitment to work on them often. There is a book called - Are you the one for me. An excellent book.

Be open to the process and become absorbed. You will find that the time spent on your even at times painful will be time will spent and you will stop searching and just be and in that moment you will be prepared for when he does come along and he may not be what you expected but all that you need in the end GOD willing.

Hope this helps and good luck!!

^ well said JMR !!

Indeed