Are You Librans Conscious of Your Mind Games?

Hey guys,

I posted a thread awhile back about this thing with another girl, the thread is here: https://www.dxpnet.com/opinion/libra/libra-women-if-you-were-not-interested-4548339/
Long story short, girl was being famously hot and cold with me, and during a cold storm, I went in for the kill.... and it crashed and burned. Whatever life goes on, I'm good!

So today I see Ms. Libran in what seems like a couple of weeks, she slips a "Hi", and boy is she looking good. In fact, she's looking just the way I use to tell her I liked her. Anyway I just say hi back and do my own thing. Now, I'm honestly over her (I'm pursuing someone else, a Leo =D), but out of the corner of my eye I notice she's looking at me, all covert and inconspicuous.

Anyway, as I was about to leave work, I had to say bye to a couple of colleagues who just so happened to be near her. So as I talk to them for a good minute or two, Ms. Libran — who was so focussed on her own work as I walked past her — decided that she would also talk to other men* she normally doesn't give a fuck about right in front of me. No, I didn't entertain her, I just left.

It was that little bit at the end which intrigued me enough to ask you guys and gals why you might do such things. I'm calling it mind games, but I know some of you Librans don't like that term. And no, it's nothing like a dark Scorpio mind game. It's the type of thing that looks innocent enough, but there's a little bit more to it whether you know it or not (I'm a Water sign, I can pick up these things =P).

So, are you guys conscious you do these little things to test others? What do you think this girl's deal is?

*Kinda feel sorry for these guys in a way. She's a wonderful person, but she ain't exactly talking to them because she finds them interesting!

I'm going to re-iterate that the term 'mind games' wasn't meant to be negative. In fact, it may be the wrong term. Maybe it stems from indecision?

The ones that do this are aware, but they'll deny it.

Charmers are naturally manipulative, you know.

People who do this are just stupid and immature, regardless of sign.

Posted by tiziani
I think you presume to know her a little too well.

...because I do? Or at least I did... our conversations were rather deep, personal, and eye opening. Libras don't usually open up unless they're real cool with someone right? The reason I joined this site is that because what happened when it intensified didn't logically follow.

Then again, I think it was you that lol'd at her chart in the other thread, saying it was pretty fucked up, so maybe I really didn't know her at all!

Posted by rockyroadicecream
The ones that do this are aware, but they'll deny it.

Charmers are naturally manipulative, you know.

People who do this are just stupid and immature, regardless of sign.

Mmm I'm a charmer, and yeah I suppose I can be a bit manipulative at times lol. I don't deny it though, I'm pretty honest if I'm ever asked if i'm being manipulative. Ironic, huh lol.

Not all those type of people are stupid and immature. I mean, if I say so myself, my whole situation hasn't been "omfg I like this libra please help me win this libra whatever it takes" high school musical drama, it's always been a "yo, I like her, but what's the deal?" type thing.

And in this case, I don't think this Libran is stupid or immature.... but her mojo was being seriously messed up. Correct me if I'm wrong, but Librans need to look and feel totally composed, even if they're a raging mess inside. One of my best friends is a Libra, and he's always got issues until he pretends he doesn't lol. Another Libra female friend has been in absolutely deep shit since I knew her, and whenever she sees me it's all glossed over and this time she's definitely improving. This particular Libra I've been talking about in this thread had recently changed her ways, improved herself dramatically in 2013, was going to make herself Super Ms. Independent and.... I entered the picture lol.

But anyway I'm still around these forums because I'm fascinated by the ideals of Libra; the concept of balance, justice, fairness, goodness, whatever... though it's interesting to see the processes that you guys take to get there!

Posted by SuninLibraMooninCapVenusinScorpio
Its difficult to tell whether she is talking to other men to play games or if she genuinely wanted to have a chat with the other guys.

Speaking as a libran women, if I liked someone or was interested in someone, I wouldn't talk to other men to play jealously games, that sounds very immature.

If you still like her, maybe stop pursuing the other leo and talk to the libran and ask her if she is interested in getting to know you better, be direct. I think libran women often get confused so its best being direct as possible with them. If she rejects you then you have your answer and can fully focus on the leo woman.

Before I reply properly, oh wow you're intensely gorgeous! Libra Sun and Scorpio Venus.... hello! haha. My head's theoretically attracted to Libras, but I can never escape a Scorpio placement, ever. You should have been my Libra fling and it possibly could've worked! lol

-

Anyway, while you're making me second guess now, she could have talked to them at any other time since they were always there in front of her.

I should reiterate this isn't a "help me with my love interest" type thread that seems to dominate dxpnet, but just a keen discussion as to how you guys operate. I know you guys like clear, direct communication, but how is that achieved when you're apparently a passive sign? For example, I was the victim of a mind game from another Libra female; we got on absolutely famously that people around us were wondering if we were an item. Apparently she wouldn't stop talking about how amazing I was even when I wasn't around, and we were so hot that her father was totally rooting for us to get together lol. But all the while she had a boyfriend who she had serious issues with, and once things were patched up, all the spark between us was gone, but what was left was cool platonic easiness which we share 'til this day.

Posted by apex

So, are you guys conscious you do these little things to test others? What do you think this girl's deal is?

Hi. Sorry things didn't work out as you'd hoped.

Regarding the alleged "Libran mind game," and "Libran test/s," I think Libras are capable of these behaviors, but they are often more the result of innocent misunderstanding than malice.

When I was newly married, a male co-worker of mine frequently chatted me up during lunch, breaks, etc. I never thought much about it, just thought he was a pleasant, friendly person. Later on, he confronted me about my being married. I was stunned. I mean, I never denied being married, wore my rings to work daily. But, no, I'd never specifically TOLD the man, "Look, I'm married," because I truly thought he was just a nice, friendly person talking to me. I didn't know he was possibly interested in me in a romantic way.

I'm sure this guy saw me as an adulterer -- or, at least, as "leading him on" -- and I just considered myself talking to a friend (or a potential friend.)

Friendly suggestion -- be prepared to accept that many things you think you can easily "read" on Librae may not be entirely accurate. Water signs frequently boast very good psychic perceptions, but it is often "muddled" on Librae (and perhaps other air signs, as well.) I'm frequently stunned/amused by what water signs profess to "know" about me simply from talking (or e-talking) for a few minutes. They are mistaken more often than not. I only know one water male who reads me incredibly well, and I suspect this is due to our strong, long-term emotional ties.

Posted by CreoleGeisha

Hi. Sorry things didn't work out as you'd hoped.

Regarding the alleged "Libran mind game," and "Libran test/s," I think Libras are capable of these behaviors, but they are often more the result of innocent misunderstanding than malice.

When I was newly married, a male co-worker of mine frequently chatted me up during lunch, breaks, etc. I never thought much about it, just thought he was a pleasant, friendly person. Later on, he confronted me about my being married. I was stunned. I mean, I never denied being married, wore my rings to work daily. But, no, I'd never specifically TOLD the man, "Look, I'm married," because I truly thought he was just a nice, friendly person talking to me. I didn't know he was possibly interested in me in a romantic way.

I'm sure this guy saw me as an adulterer -- or, at least, as "leading him on" -- and I just considered myself talking to a friend (or a potential friend.)

Friendly suggestion -- be prepared to accept that many things you think you can easily "read" on Librae may not be entirely accurate. Water signs frequently boast very good psychic perceptions, but it is often "muddled" on Librae (and perhaps other air signs, as well.) I'm frequently stunned/amused by what water signs profess to "know" about me simply from talking (or e-talking) for a few minutes. They are mistaken more often than not. I only know one water male who reads me incredibly well, and I suspect this is due to our strong, long-term emotional ties.

Wow this comment is pretty insightful, especially the bold. I wouldn't say Librans are an open book, and they are certainly fascinating from the water side of the fence. I don't boast my emotional intuition though, definitely not (especially if it's only a few minutes of talking)! In fact, it got ruthlessly tested by my previous Libra fling who had a boyfriend, but she was still acting really charming and pleasant towards me. It was a little bit like your situation, and I thought that she was still open to having a relationship with me. Dead wrong lol. I now have a typical Libra friendship with her: go months without seeing her, then we meet up and everything's still great lol. Same with a Libra male friend of mine.

I had spent a good 12 weeks getting to know the Libra of this thread and my old one (though she insisted we knew each other for much longer), but she obvio

Posted by notyourtype
While we do like direct and honest communication, we don't like feeling rushed or cornered. So if we feel like you are coming on too strong (or too fast), it will cause us to retreat a little. This could be rooted in our paranoia and desire to protect ourselves, rather than our inability to make a decision. If you are trying to communicate your interest or confront us about something, it's best to approach us lightly and casually. We find it off-putting when you come off too eager or aggressive. It does sound to me like Ms. Libran is trying to get a reaction from you by engaging with those guys, though. I'll admit I can be guilty of such antics from time to time; it's not something I'm proud of, but it does happen and it's usually deliberate, unless my boyfriend is involved.

Who's that really good looking dude in your pic? Reminds me of Daniel Wu!

Anyway, I did corner her. During a dead cold phase, I confronted her about her flakiness. I don't think anyone in this forum would've applauded me for what I did. That's okay, I just wanted to nip it in the bud.

Here's the thing though: I'm not exactly a social runt. I think we clicked because we were both quite magnetic; whereas she's got that sweet charm going on, I do have raw charisma that turns heads. I remember one evening before she even knew me, Ms. Libran turned around as if to say bye to me, thought about it again, and walked out lol.

But attraction to status is something I'd expect from a Leo woman (which is why I love them!)... and I have a sinking feeling that if there are any subtle games to get a reaction out of me, it's because A) I don't need to know her and it's grinding her gears, and/or B) I can command as much attention as she can, sometimes even more so.

Gaaahh... I hate it when you Libras do this. You guys are such gorgeous souls that when the scales tip and you do this stupid stuff I just want to kiss you and tell you to stop! lol

Posted by Aesma

I'm like this too. If I like someone, I wouldn't give that guy a reason to get jealous or send mixed signals of a sort. When I like someone, they have my full attention. I don't like mind games or any type of game. I'm direct and don't like wasting people's time.

I do take things slow getting to know the person. I just generally observe how they are and I need to see consistency. I don't like the disappearing act either or hot/cold sorta communication pattern like 1 week we're talking you're all warm and sweet then next week I won't hear from you without any explanation. I don't like that. I guess it's safe to say nobody does.

As to why she did that, sorry I don't know if it's intentional or not. It could've been like at that exact moment she really had something to say to another guy while you were still there.

About having deep, personal and eye-opening conversations, when it comes to me I'm an open book (if they're interested to know but I normally just listen than talk about myself). I can tell you my whole life story, my dreams, my wants my needs and anything under the sun but it doesn't mean you're a close friend. The only time I consider someone to be a really 'close friend' is if I tell them what I'm feeling. I normally don't talk about my feelings to anyone. That's something I reserve for those I want to have in my life for as long as I live.

This is actually quite awesome.

We were both in a way hot and cold... she would flake out on proposed dates and I sometimes couldn't control my Gemini Moon swings lol.

Thinking about it, I'd say what we talked about was 60/40, life story/feelings. I'm a Cancer Sun, so when even I say things went deep, then things went deep! And I had broken into her "emotional barrier" - that's what I call that inner circle you Librans seem to have. Btw that inner circle you guys have is crazy! Who would of known what's really going on inside your heads!

If there really isn't any mind games going on from her end, all the better. But I just had an epiphany: maybe she's fascinated by the way I think and behave the way I'm fascinated by the way she thinks and behaves, hence I talk about all this shit even after I've moved on.

Posted by tiziani

Posted by apex

Posted by tiziani
I think you presume to know her a little too well.

...because I do? Or at least I did... our conversations were rather deep, personal, and eye opening. Libras don't usually open up unless they're real cool with someone right? The reason I joined this site is that because what happened when it intensified didn't logically follow.

Then again, I think it was you that lol'd at her chart in the other thread, saying it was pretty fucked up, so maybe I really didn't know her at all!

did I? Fair play. But you're saying you know her motivations for speaking with other guys. If I'm being totally straight with you it's in moments like that where arrogance gets the better of people. Either way she doesn't like she's going to make you happy. If it's mind games then pay it no mind. That's my 2 cents.

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I know the world of agendas don't revolve around me. I might be a water sign, but I'm not pisces or scorpio 😛.

The discussion was more about if Librans in general were aware of these subtle tricks they employ that certainly aren't direct, and most likely unfair, unjust, and whatever else the scales usually like to extoll.

Posted by apex

Posted by CreoleGeisha

Friendly suggestion -- be prepared to accept that many things you think you can easily "read" on Librae may not be entirely accurate. Water signs frequently boast very good psychic perceptions, but it is often "muddled" on Librae (and perhaps other air signs, as well.) I'm frequently stunned/amused by what water signs profess to "know" about me simply from talking (or e-talking) for a few minutes. They are mistaken more often than not. I only know one water male who reads me incredibly well, and I suspect this is due to our strong, long-term emotional ties.

Wow this comment is pretty insightful, especially the bold. I wouldn't say Librans are an open book, and they are certainly fascinating from the water side of the fence. I don't boast my emotional intuition though, definitely not (especially if it's only a few minutes of talking)! In fact, it got ruthlessly tested by my previous Libra fling who had a boyfriend, but she was still acting really charming and pleasant towards me. It was a little bit like your situation, and I thought that she was still open to having a relationship with me. Dead wrong lol. I now have a typical Libra friendship with her: go months without seeing her, then we meet up and everything's still great lol. Same with a Libra male friend of mine.

I had spent a good 12 weeks getting to know the Libra of this thread and my old one (though she insisted we knew each other for much longer), but she obvio

click to expand

Some of your comment is lost.

Libras are frequently stereotyped as being highly narcissistic. This isn't always true (and, I hope, not even a real "norm.") I'm a nice, friendly person (I hope) and I enjoy human company, so I interact with people for enjoyment. I don't harbor secret agendas or expectations, either I get along well with them or I don't. Creating quality relationships is my priority, and I prefer building them over time to overnight.

The problem with this is that, often, people involved with me are WAY AHEAD of me in terms of defining a relationship and establishing expectations. I consider us acquaintances who are very cool with each other, they consider us tight, close friends. I think a man is really wonderful and fun to be with, he thinks we're just about ready for the altar. I end up confused

Posted by tiziani
Between you and me, I'll wear a wiretap right now and drop a state secret right here: In my opinion, most Libras don't care about what's fair. That's a concept that's highly overrated and misunderstood.


In reality a more experienced Libra's mentality will be "I'll do what's right by you, and what's fair for me." And we often end up doing a half ass job at both, but at least we're the person you can rely on to deliver on both ends. To some people that's not enough, the love is too spread out. But who else is going to do it?

That has nothing to do with what's absolutely fair for everyone. Just about what's important to a Libra. I find Aquarius is a more "universally" fair sign than Libra.


Also, everyone was put on this Earth to manipulate. You water signs have your emotions, we have our thoughts. Let the chips fall where they may.

Interesting. I was all set to hotly refute your comment, but I stopped and thought a minute. You could be on to something here.

I'm pretty addicted to fairness and justice, but I'm also born in a Dog year. So is one of my aunts and her husband. The only thing worse than a Libra Dog with a cause is a pack of Libra Dogs. We write angry letters to our government, we call our government reps to complain about anything we think is wrong. We contact foreign governments who have nothing to do with us and tell them about their backsides, too.

In her off time, my aunt has also publicly chastised a well-known ice cream manufacturer for its excessive use of red dye in its strawberry ice cream. Yes, she went there.

Posted by tiziani

Posted by CreoleGeisha

Posted by tiziani
Between you and me, I'll wear a wiretap right now and drop a state secret right here: In my opinion, most Libras don't care about what's fair. That's a concept that's highly overrated and misunderstood.


In reality a more experienced Libra's mentality will be "I'll do what's right by you, and what's fair for me." And we often end up doing a half ass job at both, but at least we're the person you can rely on to deliver on both ends. To some people that's not enough, the love is too spread out. But who else is going to do it?

That has nothing to do with what's absolutely fair for everyone. Just about what's important to a Libra. I find Aquarius is a more "universally" fair sign than Libra.


Also, everyone was put on this Earth to manipulate. You water signs have your emotions, we have our thoughts. Let the chips fall where they may.

Interesting. I was all set to hotly refute your comment, but I stopped and thought a minute. You could be on to something here.

I'm pretty addicted to fairness and justice, but I'm also born in a Dog year. So is one of my aunts and her husband. The only thing worse than a Libra Dog with a cause is a pack of Libra Dogs. We write angry letters to our government, we call our government reps to complain about anything we think is wrong. We contact foreign governments who have nothing to do with us and tell them about their backsides, too.

In her off time, my aunt has also publicly chastised a well-known ice cream manufacturer for its excessive use of red dye in its strawberry ice cream. Yes, she went there.

I could also be highly biased by the fact i'm a Fifth House Sun. It's an interesting mix for me. But when people outside of us say that Libras change the rules often and are mainly focused on what's fair for them, not others, I totally understand what they are getting at in general. And I do not think this is a bad thing.

I like the sound of your family, you sound like big characters.

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There's a price tag attached, though. My aunt is on no-fly lists due to participation in anti-Vietnam War protests. So now they have to drive everywhere. I haven't made the list yet.

Posted by backtokemet
if you're mature, you'll waste your time trying to date a libra woman who isn't at least 33 .. to have an idea of a librette level of maturity, you need to substract 8 to 10 years from her actual age .. seriously

libra women will talk about love, romance and all that BS but treat men like toys until they've found Mr Right (mentally stimulating, ambitious, financially comfortable, "eye candy" etc) .. with Mr Right, she may take the games down a notch to make him believe she's done some growing up...


B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T .. libra women don't want to grow up !

Lol, damn. Do you think age really matters, ?

Posted by backtokemet
if you're mature, you'll waste your time trying to date a libra woman who isn't at least 33 .. to have an idea of a librette level of maturity, you need to substract 8 to 10 years from her actual age .. seriously

libra women will talk about love, romance and all that BS but treat men like toys until they've found Mr Right (mentally stimulating, ambitious, financially comfortable, "eye candy" etc) .. with Mr Right, she may take the games down a notch to make him believe she's done some growing up...


B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T .. libra women don't want to grow up !

I think you're sort of right here, but it depends on many external factors, too. I'm a Libra female. I'm the youngest in my family and I was born when my parents were older. I've been the "baby" all my life.

I know I look, sound, and behave younger than my actual age. I'm old enough that being carded at a bar or a restaurant is almost insulting. Part of it is healthy life style choices and my family background, but some of it could be astrological.

What's disturbing is people (even those I don't know well) treat me like the "baby." It's like I'm releasing energy or body language projecting that response. I'm actually quite bright, well-educated, and professionally competent, but somehow, socially, I'm still very much a girl. And I'm treated like it.

Apex- Everybody plays mind games... and don't forget Cancers are known to be the most manipulative of all the Zodiac signs. They are the almighty rulers of mind games :p.