How do you fellow Libra's deal with the silent treatment?

I recently had to endure the silent treatment from a "friend" (I use that term liberally), whose purpose of it was, I suppose, to punish me while controlling the situation.
I'm in my early 30's and haven't had to deal with the cold shoulder/silent treatment since I was a teen, and this was a woman whom I deeply admired, so my emotions were all over the place.

How do you fellow Libra's deal with the silent treatment, inflicted by those you care about?

Silent treatment is THE WORST. And completely useless.

Sorry my answer is not helpful. I hate the silent treatment and don't really feel like talking about it more than that. (Ironically!! lol)

LOL. This NEVER works on me. It will straight piss me off, and I’ll say forget it, and ignore you right back.
Especially if I’ve tried to make amends, I may be hurt and upset but I’d never bring myself to constantly reach out to someone that is ignoring me.

When I was trying to get answers from my Gem ex, I wrote him twice after our breakup after no word to the second message I let up and let it go. He later wound up saying something, but yeah if a person doesn’t wanna talk to me I certainly wont try to force them. I’m not that aggressive and I don’t like rejection to begin with. Ignoring me is a direct form of rejection

Posted by Lyse
LOL. This NEVER works on me. It will straight piss me off, and I’ll say forget it, and ignore you right back.
Especially if I’ve tried to make amends, I may be hurt and upset but I’d never bring myself to constantly reach out to someone that is ignoring me.

When I was trying to get answers from my Gem ex, I wrote him twice after our breakup after no word to the second message I let up and let it go. He later wound up saying something, but yeah if a person doesn’t wanna talk to me I certainly wont try to force them. I’m not that aggressive and I don’t like rejection to begin with. Ignoring me is a direct form of rejection

YES!

When you've had to endure this, do you find that the person is trying to control and manipulate the situation or are they straight up pissed? Or done?

See, I'm straight out. I'm not going to leave anyone to continue trying to reach out to me if the relationship/friendship is over. Usually, it just leads to them trying to reach out more, which may be the point of it.

When the person leaves you unblocked on Facebook, but giving you the silent treatment, it felt like I didn't exist. Awful feeling.

Don't.


Walk.

Dear, nobody is going to tell you what you want to hear.

You are in an abusive friendship and you need to walk. Stop grabbing for straws as reasons to stick around with that grade A cuntbag. Move along.

I am not a Libra but I CANNOT DEAL with the silent treatment, shows a lack of maturity on the part of people, like they cannot deal with their problems and don't want to put in the effort to make amends. I just say whatever and move on.

Posted by rockyroadicecream
Dear, nobody is going to tell you what you want to hear.

You are in an abusive friendship and you need to walk. Stop grabbing for straws as reasons to stick around with that grade A cuntbag. Move along.

Hi Rocky. She is still blocked and I haven't reached out to her in over a month. I guess I want answers to things she never will. That, and I'm hurt.
I'm naive, I guess. I've never been in a one-sided friendship, let along an abusive one with a control freak.
It's still hard for me to see her that way.

Your words are tough, but I do appreciate them. Thanks 🙂

Posted by Caligal2015

Posted by rockyroadicecream
Dear, nobody is going to tell you what you want to hear.

You are in an abusive friendship and you need to walk. Stop grabbing for straws as reasons to stick around with that grade A cuntbag. Move along.

Hi Rocky. She is still blocked and I haven't reached out to her in over a month. I guess I want answers to things she never will. That, and I'm hurt.
I'm naive, I guess. I've never been in a one-sided friendship, let along an abusive one with a control freak.
It's still hard for me to see her that way.

Your words are tough, but I do appreciate them. Thanks 🙂

click to expand

I understand. I've been in the same boat but switch the signs. The Libra was the one being the dickhole and I was the Aries getting screwed.

It sucks but you have to stand your ground because your ultimate goal is looking out for YOUR own wellbeing. The offending "friend" clearly isn't. Even if you can't get answers, you need to stick by the conviction of looking out for your emotional wellbeing, seeing as only you are the only one that has complete power over that aspect.

I cut them off for awhile at least, if not permanently.

Worst thing you can do to me is ignoring me. I want everything to be discussed no matter how painful and heavy the discussion will be... that's how you understand people. How can you understand what's on someone's mind if he's ignoring you. When I'm ignored, it brings out the evil in me, the paranoia in me. I do craziest things when I'm ignored... sometimes even to a point of vengeance, it's like someone opens a Pandora's box.

Posted by Lyse
LOL. This NEVER works on me. It will straight piss me off, and I’ll say forget it, and ignore you right back.
Especially if I’ve tried to make amends, I may be hurt and upset but I’d never bring myself to constantly reach out to someone that is ignoring me.

When I was trying to get answers from my Gem ex, I wrote him twice after our breakup after no word to the second message I let up and let it go. He later wound up saying something, but yeah if a person doesn’t wanna talk to me I certainly wont try to force them. I’m not that aggressive and I don’t like rejection to begin with. Ignoring me is a direct form of rejection

Well what do you know my ex is also a Gemini. He keeps on ignoring me. I'm still trying to reach out but I'm reaching to that point that I don't care anymore. Ignore me for all I care, I'll just do whatever I want to do. If it hurts him, then it is what it is. At least I tried to reach out.

Posted by fkpkr

Posted by Lyse
LOL. This NEVER works on me. It will straight piss me off, and I’ll say forget it, and ignore you right back.
Especially if I’ve tried to make amends, I may be hurt and upset but I’d never bring myself to constantly reach out to someone that is ignoring me.

When I was trying to get answers from my Gem ex, I wrote him twice after our breakup after no word to the second message I let up and let it go. He later wound up saying something, but yeah if a person doesn’t wanna talk to me I certainly wont try to force them. I’m not that aggressive and I don’t like rejection to begin with. Ignoring me is a direct form of rejection

Well what do you know my ex is also a Gemini. He keeps on ignoring me. I'm still trying to reach out but I'm reaching to that point that I don't care anymore. Ignore me for all I care, I'll just do whatever I want to do. If it hurts him, then it is what it is. At least I tried to reach out.

click to expand

Well what do you know my ex is a Libra. He keeps ignoring me. Unlike you, I am not reaching out anymore. I did that song and dance and they chose to avoid responding. Couldn't even face me and it was over a petty argument but I was so appreciated for me being me. They broke up with me over a fucking text. Yes, a text. Go ahead and do what you want; I'm sure he will do the same. You had to have done something to royally piss him off. That's the only time a Gem will leave without giving you any quarter (other is if you cheated). If you are truly serious about getting him back, the only way you may be able to do so is by profusely apologizing and actually meaning it.

I'm with @fkpkr. Silent treatment from a person significant in my personal life makes me absolutely crazy. It's one of the few things that can visibly rattle my composure.

Posted by duchesslibro
Silent treatment is THE WORST. And completely useless.

On second thought.. I guess it's not *completely* useless if the perpetrator's intent was to incite a reaction from me.

Yes, those are strong words. Giving the silent treatment to Airy people should be a crime. lol

What's her sign? And do you known why she did this to you

Posted by mysteriousTaurus
What's her sign? And do you known why she did this to you

She's an Aries with a pisces moon.

She dictated and controlled everything in our brief friendship. I stuck around because I've never been emotionally connected to another chick before.
She pretty much controls everything we're gonna do, what time, when, the method of interaction and how much we would interact. It's like I didn't have a say. She held the cards and had the power and it felt like it was her way or the highway.

She would "schedule" me to hang out, even at times up to 5 weeks away, and be very cold during that time, suggesting she didn't want to interact until she felt like it (usually the night before hanging out). It always felt like I was bothering her between the time of hanging out, but when you're trying to cultivate a new friendship and not interacting by keeping in touch at all for a period of 5 weeks, it's like hitting the reset button each time and I never felt I had the power or the voice, in this particular friendship, to say otherwise.

The catalyst to the ending of the friendship is her, lying, making me feel that this "friendship" is way too important to me and not enough to her.
It wouldn't be the first time she's lied, to try and bring a swift end to our conversation...

Me: Hey woman, I just wanted to say hi and ask how your weekend was?
Her: OMG girl my laptop took a shit and my tablet is so slow, so haven't been on Facebook at all. I'm good. So how about noon on 9/25, we can walk around the mall.

I never asked her why she hadn't been on FB. I just wanted to say hi. At that point, it was like 2.5 or 3 weeks since I last texted her. So I feel stupid, because I know she had been on Facebook, since we were on at the same time because she liked a few of her own pics that she had been tagged in, so they were popping up in my newsfeed. I didn't even need to know that, as her answer was a defensive one. And c'mon, you haven't been on Facebook at all during that time? Why respond with a lie when I didn't even ask you that, but it wouldn't have been the first time. I'm not even sure she was aware she was lying.

I call her out on it, jokingly, to get her to stop. She digs her heels in and says "no, really..." and for the first time in our couple of months friendship, she actually asks me how I'm doing (I'm sure to just deflect). We text back and forth with me joking and her getting increasingly defensive, changing the subject of my texts.
My last text to her is acknowledging this...I tell her "you change the subject a lot...lol...someone has a lot of sh-t to hide. LMAO J/K" with a bunch of smiley faces.
Now, I would have responded with something like "yeah, I'm still wanted in Texas" or something lame like that.

She replies, seemingly defensive, saying "no way man!!! I'm an open book!!! I took the day off to take my s

continued:

son to the dentist."

At this point, I don't feel the friendship is worth cultivating. She "schedules" me to hang out with her even though we work down the street from one another, having the same work times, lunch breaks, and three day weekends; everything is on her terms (when she feels like texting, the day before hanging out and the day of, we text back and forth like BFF's, but when I do it- even once in a few weeks in between hanging out- she's cold, aloof, and I feel as though I'm bothering her) and controls everything about what we do, when, times, etc.
And the white lies, unprompted. I also don't feel like I can really talk to her about any issues I have in the friendship, because the last time I apologize for something, she scolds me for doing so. So I feel done and just want to have a fair friendship, as I'm never asking for much and we're doing things on 100% on her terms.

That night, I send her a text, cancelling our upcoming scheduled hang-out "for now", and ask her to just hit me up for when she has time for a traditional friendship.

20 minutes later (maybe less than that), without a word, she unfriends me on Facebook but leaves me unblocked.

I'm kind of in shock, but not. My gut knew she was going to bounce, but I'm so in admiration of this woman, that it's hard to let go of this. I am also very indecisive and forgive and forget very easily. I have posted more, but not the entire story, on the Aries side of the forum but it's rather long.

Two weeks after she unfriends me, I reach out to her via text. Nothing. The following day, I send her an e-mail. Nothing. A day later, I send an e-mail asking her to reconsider her decision (sad, I know) and give her a specific date, around my birthday, to think it over until...nothing. She's giving me the cold shoulder/silent treatment and my family and I perceive it as punishment for trying to get the friendship back on a fair footing.
She never says anything.

My husband and close friend tell me to have some self-esteem, allow this "friend" to walk away and stop going through this cycle of her reeling me back in. I send her one final FB message, telling her that I wish her the best and as my family tells me, I block her on Facebook.
Strangely enough, on the day that I gave her to think about it until, someone resets my Facebook password. It wasn't me and she is the only person with that particular e-mail address. My facebook was not hacked, just the reset password email sent to me.

Other than that odd coincidence, I've not heard from her and don't expect to. If she responded to me, she'd give up the control, give me the attention and the power and everything she's done up until now, has been with her in control.

You could've just posted the link from your Aries thread haha.

Posted by rockyroadicecream
You could've just posted the link from your Aries thread haha.

I know, lol. I just realized how much easier that woulda been 🙂

Off topic, is it just me or does anyone else really fit their Libra description down to a "T" when it comes to being indecisive..I really hate that. I make a decision, know in my gut in it's the right decision, and then my head begins to rationalize away. Doesn't matter what it is...

Depends on other placements.