How to win my Libra man back?

I'm an Aries woman, and I have been with my Libra man almost two years. The first year was perfect, we never argued. During our second year, we still had a good time together, but we had a lot of arguments. I tended to start them a lot, over silly things and I know how much libra hates confrontation, but being a hot headed ram, I couldnt help myself start an argument when I was annoyed. He would always get upset and hurt, and I'd say I'd change and not be so aggressive all the time.
Eventually, in the last few months, arguments between us became extreme. Unfortunately I had to go away for 5 weeks, so we spoke over text. The last argument we had, he said he couldn't take it anymore, so regretfully, I told him that I didn't care, be my guest and leave our relationship, from which he took the offer. He told me his heart was breaking but I gave him no choice. Obviously straight away, I was devastated I tried calling, messaging everything to say sorry, but nothing.
I left him for a couple of days before writing an apology note, from which he said, it will take time to get back together but he hopes to see me when I'm back.
Since then, we have gone from speaking everyday, to absolutely nothing. I never hear from him anymore but I got back a few days ago, so I messaged him to meet and he agreed to see me yesterday.
I was hopeful that everything would go back to normal, however it seems now that he is just playing with my heart. I told him how regretful I was about our arguments, and I have been really working on myself to change and become a much calmer person (which is true). I've been going to the gym, starting meditation and just really focusing on myself, which he agreed was good.
He said he still loves me but apparently he's only 90% there and will only get back with me when he feels it's 100% . We were also intimate. He said it helped gather his emotions better (which I know is utter rubbish) but I let it happen because our sexual attraction is so strong, I just couldn't help myself!
He hasn't told his family we have split, which is a good sign but I don't understand what he wants. At first he told us to stay separate for a while and work on ourselves so he can gather his feelings better. But, I'm not going to wait around for him, just to tell me he's not interested anymore? So then, he agreed we start fresh and stay as friends, go the movies, and we left it on that note.
He hasn't messaged me at all, which he usually would do before we broke up.

I just don't understand how he can go from messaging me everyday to now nothing. He seems to be talking to someone else all the time, and he's started trying to follow a lot of girls on Instagram. He also said to me it was my idea to talk, and that he wasn't 'fussed' about it, which really confused me if he still says he loves me.

My question is, do you think I can get this relationship back somehow? What do I do now? Do I wait for his message or keep light conversation? I really love this man, and I want to show him so much that I can change, and I can only show that to him when we're together. How can I convince him otherwise we are still good together?

haha, how many times did you tell him you wanted to break up??!? you know us....always wanting to give you what you want.....lol.

seriously, if you push someone away enough times, one day they just won't come back.

I feel like if he does take u back it will only be just to have someone. U should find someone more on your energy level. He sounds too passive.

It's very common for opposites to be great in the beginning and slowly realize it's more difficult than enjoyable to be witth each other. It's also important to realize that you are who you are. I understand that you want to change for the better and control your anger and impulses but honey you're an Aries. So be an Aries. Remember that could take decades to control, you should find someone who loves u the way u are, flaws, anger issues and all. It's not your fault that you are the way you are, just like it's not my fault I'm stubborn. It's a part of my personality, take it or leave it. His passiveness clashes with your personality Instead of complimenting it. When u are being irrational and shout that u want to break up, he says okay, and walks away. No, u need someone who will shut up and make love to you. That's what' u need.

He's torturing and emotionally abusing you. It's normal for someone to get really frustrated and just blurt out I want to break up, there's only so much someone can take. Stop blaming yourself for this and think about why u guys are arguing so much, what is HE doing wrong also. It takes two people to argue.

Nope.

He's already entertaining thoughts of other women. Methinks he checked out ages ago and was just waiting for the right time, aka "until he had another woman in the wings." Libra dudes always have a back up plan.

I know it's hard and shitty, but you don't want this guy back. Things won't be the same. Continue to work on yourself and work through the post break up emotions.

At the moment, you're just suffering from typical "I want what I can't have." Sounds like dude gave you plenty of chances and you screwed it up. The Libra/Aries connection is a strong one, but it doesn't mean it's always meant to be, dear. There's a difference between compromise and changing who you are to make a relationship work. It should never be the latter.

I never thought I was would say this but I agree with rocky on this one. U are compromising waaaaaaay too much on this one who doesn't not seem to be worth it. You're giving so much and he's just 'there'. You're trying your best to change for someone who is living a single life in the mean time instead of being by your side and supporting you.
You are much more innocent than he realizes. This is who you are, isn't he supposed to love you unconditionally? It doesn't look like it..

All too often women try to change who they are in order to keep the guy.

Why the hell try to cram a puzzle piece if it doesn't fit? Ends up fucking up the entire picture in the long run...

yes!! ^ honey, maybe you two just are not compatible, did you ever consider that?

I know many can’t wait to bash a male Libra but honestly in this case, I don’t think this is his fault. He is not a push over, he fought for the relationship and the girl he loved because at one point she and the relationship he had with her is what he truly wanted.
The balance in this relationship has been sucked out due to the Aries controlling nature. She has to control, and no matter how many times he warned her, it fell on deaf ears because at the time she was in control and didn’t care. She even admitted she couldn’t help herself. Libra’s love hard and it’s easy for it to be mistaken as weakness for that person, when we “actually” love, there’s nothing we won’t do to make the relationship work, that way if it doesn’t work and it comes to an end we can honestly say we gave it our best shot, and walk away without feeling bad.

He may very well love you, but that does not mean he doesn’t want to see what else is out there now that you gave him his walking papers. You set him free because you were upset, this is the part about a fire sign that doesn’t always work in their favor, they don’t think before they act, they just act and often pay for it later. Libra’s wallow and weigh back and forth, over and over before making a decision, but one a decision is made good luck on getting us to revert back into that thinking space. Frankly they don’t care too much after that, but they are “kind” enough to make the other person think they do (just to soften the blow a bit) I honestly don’t think he’s “in love” anymore, because I can assure you if he were he would not act this way. A Libra has a one track mind in matters of love. There is ALWAYS someone ahead of the pack. If not, then the Libra doesn’t like any of them enough to focus on just one, that means each one is missing something that he genuinely craves, but since he’s a sociable flirt, he won’t turn down the attention or the friendship. Why would he?

I’ve never went back to an ex. I still entertain them because I mean if we were good friends, or had happy times I can enjoy you as a friend but that’s about it. The men are still men, he will have sex if you offer it especially if it’s good but it doesn’t mean he wants you back.
I’m a natural flirt, sometimes I don’t even realize I’m doing it, and an ex will mistake it for me wanting to re-kindle.
I have an Aries that wants to re-kindle right now, and there are two reason I don’t want to. One is because my heart is wrapped up over a Scorpio, I cant be into two guys at once, one of them will get the short end of the stick and even though I’m not speaking to the Scorp I need time to get over him before entraining someone else.
The second reason is because I already gave the Aries a fair shot, and he blew it no matter how many times I warned him that he was blowing it with me. Now he wants to give me everything I want, marriage kids, and life and even though I want those things so badly, I’m not so sure I want them with him just because he’s the man offering it to me.

Posted by tiziani
I don't think that really applies to the male perspective though.

what would be the male perspective tiz?

Posted by tiziani
Maybe the most useful input I can give it to highlight the parts that make sense to me.


"seriously, if you push someone away enough times, one day they just won't come back"


"His passiveness clashes with your personality Instead of complimenting it"

"He's already entertaining thoughts of other women."

"The Libra/Aries connection is a strong one, but it doesn't mean it's always meant to be. There's a difference between compromise and changing who you are to make a relationship work. It should never be the latter."

"A Libra has a one track mind in matters of love. There is ALWAYS someone ahead of the pack. If not, then the Libra doesn’t like any of them enough to focus on just one, that means each one is missing something that he genuinely craves, but since he’s a sociable flirt, he won’t turn down the attention or the friendship. Why would he?"


^I relate to all of the above.

thanks. yes, i relate to them as well.

You gave him no choice but to leave. You dug the grave now you will lay in it. Give him space. Tons of it.

its not entirely her fault, stop blaming her.

Posted by mysteriousTaurus
its not entirely her fault, stop blaming her.

LOL. You sound like your protecting your little sister. It's cute. lol.

I always think it's great when people on dxp take up for one another. There's an Aries and Cancer on here that always has my back. I love it. lol

Posted by Lyse

Posted by mysteriousTaurus
its not entirely her fault, stop blaming her.

LOL. You sound like your protecting your little sister. It's cute. lol.

I always think it's great when people on dxp take up for one another. There's an Aries and Cancer on here that always has my back. I love it. lol

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Lol someone has to do it. I hate when there's like 4 people against 1.... I'll bring my bull out and turn Into 3 people real quick so it's nice and even 👼

They're both at fault. She's a primary problem, but he doesn't help it any, either.

In the long run, all this is is another incompatible pairing and one is grasping at straws to make it work out of desperation/being caught up in the emotions of the moment.