Libra ladies help me understand my situation

*Warning* Long post here.. Appreciate any help!

I am getting some really strange signals and interactions with this libra and can't wrap my brain around it..

Last October at a work event (I work 1 weekend a month) I caught eye contact with this girl and we beamed smiles at each other, I was in the middle of a conversation so it wasn't appropriate to go say hi at the moment so I was going to do it later. Later came and I walked around to find her and I guess she went home because I didn't end up seeing her again. Fast forward to the next month I make sure I place myself in a situation that is likely to allow me to see her again and sure enough at a big meeting I spot her again and I am certain she's smiling my direction once more. The situation doesn't allow for conversation there either, another month comes and I plan this one a bit better, I was going to walk out of the building with her and introduce myself as we have to go back to our individual buildings. She starts moving towards the door and I end up in front of her and as I walk out she gets caught up in conversation, no big deal I can burn a few minutes, the minutes pass and she is still conversing so it's whatever I'll try again next time.

I end up finding her on facebook and add her, she gets on and we chat for a couple hours very easily, and that weekend I finally get my chance to introduce myself and it turns kind of awkward because I do the introduction and was going to roll right into asking about her day and such and a wave of people come out of a meeting and we basically get caught in the flow so we meet/greet/shake hands and it's over. I ask her the following week if she wants to come out on a saturday and hang out, I plan up some events for us to do to have fun and whatever, don't mention to her what they will be to keep it as a casual surprise. She says she doesn't think she has anything going on but she will have to check. Friday I message her and I get a 'I think I'm too busy' response. I instantly shrug her off as not being interested so it's whatever. My birthday comes around and she messages me and by the end of this conversation she's basically setup a situation for us to get together for dinner that upcoming weekend. So I give her the benefit of the doubt for the previous situation and she's showing effort here, come the day before she tells me she's not feeling well.

I'm not sure whether to believe it and just give the space for her to reschedule something or if I should be pissed because I am being fed lines of BS at this point. I gave her my number for both of those events we planned out and never got a text or anything, at this point I've pretty much blown it off. Weeks later I am speaking with friends and the one mentions that this girl has a guy shes with, someone she's not really interested in but enjoys the physical action supposedly. This to me ties things together a bit for the flaky actions. Two weeks ago she messages me on facebook and is telling me about how they broke up... Several days ago I tell her I am going to be in her town to watch a game with friends, she tells me we should get together for coffee, I say okay and tell her I'll message her later in the week for when I will be heading out there. Send the message, actually get her number to text her with a time etc... Finally MEET her yesterday for coffee and socialize for 2hrs, I had to go to join my friends so I invited her out and she told me she has a lot of homework she has to do but if she can put in a good amount she will join us later. Later comes and she starts texting saying she was honest about coming out and such and I tell her that I am excited for her to come. She ends up at the place and it's insanely loud for the game, we are still socializing and being goofy with each other, I have some minor hand contact with her leg when leaning in sometimes for hearing her. By the end of the game she is slowly starting to text more on her phone, but overall she interacted with me 100% the time we were there. We leave the bar to hit the streets because it's a big deal in this town that the team just won, on the car ride music is playing and her and I are dancing in the back of the car so there is touching naturally with this.. We traverse through massive crowds and at one point I end up putting my hand on her lower back to gently move her because we are in the way of some people and she immediately pulls away and I was taken aback by the abrupt movement but figured no big deal. Later we end up at a bar and by this time she's texting constantly, she isn't really giving much attention at all. One of my friends brings me out on the dance floor and we are having a good time and she calls over to the girl to come dance with me and she flat out says no. However she dances with another one of the guys that later showed in the group who is

with someone. I'm confused at this point to wtf is going on, I mention it to another girl in our group that I'm getting some hot/cold crap here and she tells me that the girls not interested. I inquire further and she tells me that she spoke to her when we were walking around earlier something to do with implying more interaction towards me or something and apparently this girl said she doesn't like me like that. So at this point I'm a bit pissed because I could of used this information 2 hours earlier when she found out, for the rest of the night I pretty much cut showing attention towards her. She would throw some small talk and I'd respond but that's it, we all hop into the car to go back home and everyone except the driver and myself is drunk at this point. Somehow conversation in the car flows into the good guys finishing last type of crap and the girl I was trying with all this time denies it and both the girls and my guy friend in the car immediately are saying it's the truth that they are being blown off etc, they are defending me right in front of her. We drop her off she tells the group as a whole goodnight and says she had a great time etc, and here we are on the next day and there isn't a single message or anything from her, I honestly don't know where things stand because I feel like there was some interest in the initial part and there's something missing that flipped a switch—?? Is this Libra behavior in any way because I am very confused with this person.

I ended up messaging her calling her out on her actions.. Her response was "Someone made a comment about you liking me and I didn't want to lead you on. Didn't mean to be presumptuous but I've lost too many good friends in the past to that, better safe than sorry. Then because I was inebriated I executed this thought with even less grace than normal..." I told her that the comment is erroneous and that I'm not looking for a relationship at the moment. It straightens up a lot of tension quickly and the truth is am I interested? Yes, BUT, dating has been a pain in my butt, I go out with these girls and I'm realizing that I need the friendship foundation there so I am hoping that this allows me to have the opportunity to develop a friendship with her and if she turns out to be a good person then great let it grow, if not, f it.

Libra and Aqua combo should naturally tie itself up friendship or more I am hoping..?? Her B-day is Oct 2, 1990 but I have no exact time, I can likely assume central standard time for time zone. Can anything be determined without an exact time?

If she's run and distanced herself already, she really has thought about it with you and although she likes the attention as we Leebs do 🙂

At this stage she hasn't seen anything with you that she wants to make more of. Go about your own thing, the more you are too available she will think you are hung up on her!

Posted by sweethearts
If she's run and distanced herself already, she really has thought about it with you and although she likes the attention as we Leebs do 🙂

At this stage she hasn't seen anything with you that she wants to make more of. Go about your own thing, the more you are too available she will think you are hung up on her!

Easy enough, there's been a lot of goofing off via texting and such through the day and we've discussed getting together sometime in the future to hit up a local art museum and such so I'm not ultimately sure how much she's distancing things. I can certainly disappear for days/weeks at a time like the best of Aqua's! 😛

She said quote "Someone made a comment about you liking me and I didn't want to lead you on."

However, if you want to take me out and spend time and money on me then go ahead, I love the attention 🙂

Be careful, if you are ok with that then go ahead, if not as far as she is concerned she has warned you that at this stage she isn't romantically interested and that gives her permission to hang with you and have fun without you mixing up your feelings...

Posted by sweethearts
She said quote "Someone made a comment about you liking me and I didn't want to lead you on."

However, if you want to take me out and spend time and money on me then go ahead, I love the attention 🙂

Be careful, if you are ok with that then go ahead, if not as far as she is concerned she has warned you that at this stage she isn't romantically interested and that gives her permission to hang with you and have fun without you mixing up your feelings...

I'm thankful you put that together in the manner you did, I didn't really view it from such a perspective but you're very much right. However, it shouldn't be bad for me to continue on with a friendship though would it? It shouldn't in any way imply that I am taking her out for dinner on my dime or putting unnecessary expectations on me.

Posted by TasteOfChaosss
Sun Libra 9.29 ?? ??
Moon Pisces 18.45 ?? ??
Mercury Virgo 25.15 ?? ??
Venus Libra 1.48 ?? ??
Mars Gemini 12.22 ?? ??
Jupiter Leo 8.37 ?? ??
Saturn Capricorn 18.47 ?? ??
Uranus Capricorn 5.44 ?? ??
Neptune Capricorn 11.50 ?? ??
Pluto Scorpio 16.16 ?? ??
Lilith Sagittarius 7.05 ?? ??
Asc node Aquarius 4.58 ?? ??


Venus in Libra... This is what is making her indecisive about you.
Mars in Gemini... She is going to be flighty and fickle as hell!
Moon in Pisces... She will absorb your emotions and mirror them.



That's all I know 😄

Hahahaha

Mostly sounds like trouble to me— Figures that I'd have an attraction to the death of me.

Well it depends what you want from her??

Do that if you just want to be her cheer squad, she'll gladly keep you around. It's always good having a guy around to ward off other admirers, esp ones we don't want hanging around because we find it so hard to be quite rude and say "not interested, please leave me alone I don't even want to waste time talking nicely with you" So we use you to scare them off 🙂 and on the other hand if there is someone we are attracted to then you serve the purpose of being a question in their mind...is she with him? She keeps sending me signals...

Dropping her like a hotcake can reverse things IF she has had any thoughts of something other with you. You were the one that first initiated contact several times. After she told you to back off, was she the one to initiate contact again to keep you falling all over her? If so, fall over someone else in front of her and be blas? with her and her texts etc. This could promote a 360 on her part...and if it doesn't you haven't lost anything.

But one things for sure, we don't like losing our admirers. Makes us feel special!

Posted by sweethearts
Well it depends what you want from her??

Do that if you just want to be her cheer squad, she'll gladly keep you around. It's always good having a guy around to ward off other admirers, esp ones we don't want hanging around because we find it so hard to be quite rude and say "not interested, please leave me alone I don't even want to waste time talking nicely with you" So we use you to scare them off 🙂 and on the other hand if there is someone we are attracted to then you serve the purpose of being a question in their mind...is she with him? She keeps sending me signals...

Dropping her like a hotcake can reverse things IF she has had any thoughts of something other with you. You were the one that first initiated contact several times. After she told you to back off, was she the one to initiate contact again to keep you falling all over her? If so, fall over someone else in front of her and be blas? with her and her texts etc. This could promote a 360 on her part...and if it doesn't you haven't lost anything.

But one things for sure, we don't like losing our admirers. Makes us feel special!

Once again, solid, and very informative. I am certainly not interested in developing any sort of one sided friendships nor being used in any way shape or form. Likely one of the quickest ways to make me dislike an individual, I've no problem cutting all contact and seeing if she starts initiating on her own. I sent nothing her way today as I feel that I've put forth enough effort on my own end, I'll just follow the trend I've started and keep to my guns only waiting for moves on her end. Thank you for the insight sweetheart!

hope it helps but now I feel like I've just exposed myself 😛

Haha ahh this almost reminds me of me! I think, from what youve said and trying to imagine why I would act that way towards someone..

1. Theres someone else. Although she may be single and 'free', her mind is otherwise occupied in some love-relationship-type situation and until thats wrapped up and over with, she will be flaky and non-committal. Ignoring everyone to text someone, I only do this if its someone very important, otherwise Ill turn off my phone for the night or ignore the msgs.

2. I do think shes interested in you though, otherwise she wouldnt be chatting with you, joking and almost leading you on. As a Libra, if I realise that Ive given the wrong signal to a guy Ill back off completely to the point of ignoring them, incase I get blamed for hurting someone or making them angry. We are flirts, but generally Ill only flirt with someone Im interested in, I dont lead guys on knowingly anyway. So the fact that shes communicating regularly with you leads me to believe she is interested, shes just not sure how much.

My best guess is that shes got someone else happening, and shes not sure where its going but shes keeping her options wiiiiide open until shes sure what she wants. When thats over, Ill bet anything you'll suddenly find her harrassing you all the time. If it were me, I wouldnt be doing it to be rude, I would just be totally preoccupied with whatever else was going on, and just genuinely enjoying your company in the mean time. Bloody librans..

PS Saying shes not interested....I would have done the same. Nothing worse than having a group of mates talking about it and trying to 'set things up' ugh!!

Posted by Librachicky
Haha ahh this almost reminds me of me! I think, from what youve said and trying to imagine why I would act that way towards someone..

1. Theres someone else. Although she may be single and 'free', her mind is otherwise occupied in some love-relationship-type situation and until thats wrapped up and over with, she will be flaky and non-committal. Ignoring everyone to text someone, I only do this if its someone very important, otherwise Ill turn off my phone for the night or ignore the msgs.

2. I do think shes interested in you though, otherwise she wouldnt be chatting with you, joking and almost leading you on. As a Libra, if I realise that Ive given the wrong signal to a guy Ill back off completely to the point of ignoring them, incase I get blamed for hurting someone or making them angry. We are flirts, but generally Ill only flirt with someone Im interested in, I dont lead guys on knowingly anyway. So the fact that shes communicating regularly with you leads me to believe she is interested, shes just not sure how much.

My best guess is that shes got someone else happening, and shes not sure where its going but shes keeping her options wiiiiide open until shes sure what she wants. When thats over, Ill bet anything you'll suddenly find her harrassing you all the time. If it were me, I wouldnt be doing it to be rude, I would just be totally preoccupied with whatever else was going on, and just genuinely enjoying your company in the mean time. Bloody librans..

PS Saying shes not interested....I would have done the same. Nothing worse than having a group of mates talking about it and trying to 'set things up' ugh!!

Another great insight that provides some necessary clarity. I felt the same way about the constant texting thing, and I think as the alcohol consumption increased her wanting to socialize with this person became more and more apparent. I remember at one point late into the night she commented about something similar to men always looking to get laid.. I have a good feeling that person she was messaging back and forth was wanting a piece and that was likely a good turn off for her but not enough to toss him at this point in time. Also, I was slightly upset about the friends chiming in as well, I wasn't expecting it at all and was quickly perturbed by the fact that it took place. I realize things were meant for the best and all

Update please 🙂

I haven't texted/called since the 3rd I believe it was and equally she has applied zero effort on her own. We both have drill this weekend so there is a possibility of seeing each other in passing perhaps but I'm not going out of my way for anything, equally I also have finals the rest of this week and all of next week so I will be buried in books all weekend. I'm fairly confident that if she hasn't put in any effort by this point she doesn't have an ounce of interest.

Bad luck, maybe there is someone better on her way!

My kinda optimism! 😄

My kinda optimism! 😄

How about some strange thrown in..

Had drill this last weekend and had to study like crazy for finals and such so I didn't go to any casual meetings and such. Get a text from this girl saying "Sorry I didn't talk to you much today I am super out of it today" I told her "you must be really out of it as I don't believe we crossed paths today" and she goes on saying she thought she saw me at previously mentioned meeting.. Blah blah..

Then today out of nowhere she's messaging me on facebook and chatting me up before her class, evening rolls around and she's posting on my wall about some bbq joints asking when are we going to go and is all excited about it wtf??.. (when we initially met/started talking and she made plans to hang with me it was for this exact thing then she bailed on me with the 'not feeling well' card) Almost seems like tables are starting to turn, or shes just hunting for attention.

Posted by sweethearts
Well it depends what you want from her??


Dropping her like a hotcake can reverse things IF she has had any thoughts of something other with you. You were the one that first initiated contact several times. After she told you to back off, was she the one to initiate contact again to keep you falling all over her? If so, fall over someone else in front of her and be blas? with her and her texts etc. This could promote a 360 on her part...and if it doesn't you haven't lost anything.

But one things for sure, we don't like losing our admirers. Makes us feel special!

This ^^^^

Best way to decide if she's just hunting for attention vs something more without jumping straight in and starting this all over again?

Play it cool...wait for her to ask you out. If she is asking you out in a group, throw back in her face her comment of being led on...

Glad I saw this, thanks once more sweethearts! 🙂

Have spoken a couple times over the weekend and both times she said things such as 'you should come join me for this', 'we should go do that', NUMEROUS times. Waiting to see if anything comes to fruition and get an idea of just how interested she really is or if it's just keeping the admirers close and really wanting nothing.

Libra or no Libra (and we can be wishy washy), standing someone up is never right. She sounds ambivalent. You, on the other hand, sound lovely and thoughtful. Move on . . . she isn't worth the effort.

All the best,

LS67

It won't take long to work her out, we have no patience and if you keep chatting and agreeing and then not showing she'll snap one way or the other 🙂

Thank you for the kind words LS67, I am strange that I have an unyielding curiosity to know how I could ultimately mesh with an individual that keeps me from putting them behind me immediately without really trying. I believe that you are more likely right than not, however I still feel I must know.

Sweethearts, what do you mean by not showing? I find her interaction overall kind of strange/confusing as lately she is becoming really buddy buddy creating all of these mutual interests and such and talking of scheduling things to do in the future together, but like I mentioned previously I have yet to see anything actually take place. It seems to me she is balancing out the idea of me in her life and she is trying to figure out where I fit. Oddly enough though she has titled me very much as a 'friend' but her eager attitude tips me off as that of puppy love / new relationship energy.

be interested in her and what she is saying and agreeing with meeting up etc and then either don't or don't give as much attention to her when you are out. hang with the crowd. remember she is and has said she doesn't want to lead you on. if she has changed her mind then she needs to take that back! she's throwing you a bone and wanting you to chase her... then she might change her mind again... do you want that?

Ah, perfectly clear now, thanks! If the opportunity presents itself I will have no problem pulling that card, I am interested to see the results!