Married Leo Woman/Married Libra Man

First let me say "Hello", I am new to this board, but was looking for some answers and have been reading your posts and message boards for some time, so I was hoping maybe you can give me some advice!

Now, I know by posting a TOPIC like this, I am going to get a lot of slack, however, let me explain breifly, we are friends first and foremost!

We have been chatting via email approx 7 months and met once.
But I must say I am enamored by this man, literally...

I am married to a Gemini/Cancer (June 21st) we have been toegther most all of our adult lives and most of our childhood lives as well. I wasnt looking for this, but this Libra was so persistent and I actually blew him off for a bit, but then something changed and I dont know what happened, but all these months later I am like how did I get here.....

I will explain more as I rec posts to any questions and I thank you in advance for not being judgemental.

persistent and blow them off in the beginning...yup - sounds familiar. Go read my posts, LLeo. 🙂

not trying to sound cynical, but the guy has a different motive than you...make sure you're willing to accept that before progresses forward.

*progressing

K....He is also married and I am well aware of the circumstances here, we both have children and they play on rival sports teams, did not know this when we first started talking, found it kind of ironic when figured out!

And to think, this all started in email looking for something he had for sale!!

No judgement at all. But what is it you want?

LLeo, don't get involved with him. Something doesn't seem right, other than the fact you're both married to other people.

Unhappily married Libras can stray. Happy ones won't...

Divorce is not an option on either side at this time, like I said we are friends and have only met once.

Answer me this: when you met this married Libra, did you tell your husband you met him? Did your husband go with you to meet this married Libra?

being friends and being enamored with this man are separate issues.

K.....Since we have been chatting, and I must say he makes me laugh all the time, which keeps me coming back for more. He likes to hear of any sexual things I have done, past present or future, which at first I found a bit offensive being a Leo, you cant just ask me that stuff, I have to let you in first, ya know !

Hubby knows of him, thinks he is looking for one thing, which he is right, but of course I have known that since the start as well, did not meet him with hubby.

Again, there is a lot of baggage with hubby and I also, we have been together since I was 15 and him 17, we are now 39-41.

would you be OK with your husband if you found out he's been talking about sexual things with another female? doubtful.

and you didn't answer, did you tell your husband that you met another man after emailing back and forth?

And yea, friends isnt bad, but I think what I am searching for here is WTF, is up with LIBRA men, I will hear from him every day all day and then not for weeks, which makes me crazy and I cant say anything due to the situation and then all of a sudden...
"Hey Baby, I am back" Email hits my inbox and I dont want to respond and when I do it is with TONS AND TONS of sarcasm and of course he reigns me right back in again.....Hellooooooooooo

Hubby doesnt know of meeting, does know of sports events that our children have had and he was there. And as far as hubby is concerned and PLEASE this is no excuse and I opted to stay, but he left me for my cousin for a year almost 12 years ago. There has been more infidelity on his behalf, he is just to stupid not to get caught, or I am Ispy and always catch him.

amen to that, notso...i'm better off single.

I am sorry, I didnt mean to bring anyone down, and maybe I am looking for a way out, but again being LEO, they dont give up and have to much pride to admit defeat and I know that about me, I am an 8-2 Leo

I will say this, Libra has really opened up some doors that I havent seen in a long time and forgot existed in me and it makes me feel really good at times, but with that said, I am not looking to destroy anyones else's marriage or happiness for that matter including his wifes. I have been on the rec end and it is not PRETTY and takes a very long time to recover, especially for me!!

if that's the case, then why have you let it get this far??

That is it, I dont know, boredom at work, that is mostly when we talk and it always leads to a sexual nature, he is very visually stimulated by asking me what I am wearing, have I had sex lately, it is all very tre bizzaro. I think I ma trying to figure out what he wants, considering he doenst ever come right out and say it, that's for sure!!

Okay ... this is going to come out a lot harsher that I mean it to. It isn't a judgment just a bit of truth about men.

A guy I know was sleeping with a married woman because he was getting sex without having to be in a relationship. When she started getting emotionally attached he dumped her because he was afraid she would leave her husband and become his problem.

I know that you aren't shagging this guy but you were fulfilling his emotional needs without him ever having to do anything. My instinct suggests the moment you started wanting/demanding more affection, attention, yadda, yadda ... he wanted out because now he was required to do something.

read more ... okay you were satisfying his sexual desires, giving him fantasy material to ... rough up the suspect too.

Leo and Libra inspire each other and take each other further.

*** I am not looking to destroy anyone's else's marriage or happiness for that matter including his wifes.

then be the person you want to be and live by your convictions. don't be the person you are being.

*** I dont know, boredom at work, that is mostly when we talk

This is the crux of your real problem. You are using this new relationship drama to stop you from facing what you really need to face in your life: a job that doesn't fulfill you and a husband that cheats.

I don't mean to sound harsh. I am just trying to type quickly. I have to run out the door.

*** ma trying to figure out what he wants, considering he doenst ever come right out and say it, that's for sure!!

He wants distraction from the things in his life that aren't making him happy. It is a vibrational match.

(((LLeo)))

that is an applause by the way....in case anyone was wondering...lol

thank you! thank you!

*bows*

good luck tomorrow honey! let us know how it goes with the doctor. how long will you be away?

(((HP)))

I seriously have to go or I will be late. Feel better.

TOUCHE....Lil Sparrow and thank you, not to harsh at all, guess I needed to hear the reality of it from someone else, considering I have known all along what I was doing was against what I beleive in most and that is loyalty above all!!

Now, to not answer him....

Just wanted to add, hubby no longer cheats, actually after growing up a great deal and maturing, I think he seen the light. He started a business and became a father which just made his whole life. Things are really good with my hubby and LIBRA knows this, I tell him all the time, like I said I opted to stay, we went to therapy back then and things are what they are. Our only son is 13.

Thanks, LS. I have the surgery tomorrow at noon and hopefully i'll be coherent again by Sunday.

thanks

hmmm LLeo....from one Leo to another I'd say RUNNNNN!!!!!! He will continue to do this forever and a day if he could get away with it. Im considering running from my LIbra too...yes things have been great but he's not always there...he picks and chooses (and yes guys I know that's what Librans do) when we get together, although a week ago things were really good - he'd make the first move, yada yada yada but this week? hardly a word.....getting tired and like you LS...that window is starting to close...3 months on and Im no better off than I was before I met him.....Love him to bits and all that and no doubt when he comes back I'll melt but yeah....had to get that out!! LLeo....work on your marriage and if it doesnt work out, THEN I would certainly say go for it or find a new love but for now? you're playing with fire and the results for everybody:....BURNS!!

Sad thing is this: most of us come here already knowing what we're going to do, but never heed anyone else's advice.

Thank you, thank you so much to all of you, after telling my sordid tale I have a lot to think about, no one else knows and I have a GREAT deal of really close girly friends that I could confide in and I havent. It has been eating me up and I was finally able to vent some today, I am so thankful I found this place.

And Yes, I am sure my LIBRA friend will be emailing me tomorrow, I think I am going to let him know I have to chill for now!

Again, thank you and I will keep you all updated !! And HP74, dont know what surgery you are having, but hey, good luck!!

*** I am not looking to destroy anyone's else's marriage or happiness for that matter including his wifes.

then be the person you want to be and live by your convictions. don't be the person you are being.

This is the most intelligent advice i have read on any of these threads. This also hit home with me personally and i thank you.

However, i would also like to say that i understand where LL is coming from on this because i have been there. Our situations are/were almost the same.

LL, I know 2 couples (female LEO's married to Libra's) and i must say they have their ups and downs like any other relationship or marriage. LL, your Libra is completely being disrespectful to you/your marriage and his own marriage. He IS after just one thing ... a thrill ... what ever that may be. I know that this 'relationship' is sparking something inside of you ... making you feel alive and attractive, but you are demonstrating (i believe) a lack of self respect. Since i have been in your shoes, i am not judging, but i will say YOU are better than this.

Hi ALL, and Sherob, thank you so much for the advice as well, sorry I havent gotten back to you all, been busy and NO not with the LIBRA, he is a mess and once I seen it for what it was I have kinda backed off. He is emailing me a LOT, wantting to see me and wondering what has happened that I no longer want to chat with him.

I have explained that maybe I thought I was missing something and maybe I allowed him in due to that, but now I am trying to work things out within myself to resolve these issues. I told him maybe we can continue to be friends, but then I am afraid I will fall back into his web. He is so GOD DAMN charming....ughhhh, anyway, again thank you all and I will continue to keep you posted!!

LL

Ma'am, Step away from the Libra

LOL

I hear ya HP74, and hey how are you doing ?? Meaning your surgery ??

Yeah, he is emailing more now than in the last 6 months we have been talking, I kind of get the impression he thinks he is losing something, like almost desperation.
I am sure if I dont respond he will get the drift, the hard part is not responding although I know it is the right thing to do, but he makes me laugh and says the craziest stuff to get me started for the day......Ughhhh

Hmm, Libras need justification for something. So if you keep ignoring him, he'll keep pressing. I say just be honest with him and get him reasons for why you are cutting it off.

Surgery went well. Still waiting for the biopsy results.

Although I'm not a good one to talk. I have allowed Mr. Libra to stick around, even if it's limited. I don't get phone calls from him, still only text messages. If I didn't want that, I'd easily could tell him to stop. But I still get these sweet text messages.

Friday morning, the day of my surgery, I got a message that said "Good morning. Hope your surgery goes well and without any complications :* (here is a warm hug to help out a little)"

That warmed my heart.

Then this morning, "Good morning and Happy Monday. Hope you have a good and non-hectic Monday. Hope you are feeling better. :*"

I asked once what :* meant and someone said it was a symbol for a kiss. It's sweet. I know I need to let him go if he can't provide or be what I want him to be, but sad thing is, I don't know what I want right now.

Glad to hear the surgery went well, and hopefully the results will eb even better!!

And as much as I want to respond and explain, he ingores the serious emails and acts like I didnt write them or send them. And I know if I write now he will think it is all back to the way it was, he likes the chase more than the kill and when he gets the kill he doesnt know what to do with it or I perosnally think guilt sets in and that is even worse. We havent spoken since last Thursday, and I understand him needing closure, but I need to know what I am going to say and how I am going to execute it to make him understand and that I have to think about some more.