update...

It's been a month since the cancer lady and I exchanged numbers. We're still talking and texting all day long, several times into the wee hours of the morning. We've talked about everything. I send her random jokes and we tell stories of our lives.

I'm crazy about her. We've got a lot in common, from basic goals, to major wants. We're both homebodies and single parents so our day to day is remarkably similar, she's even a gamer, bonus! She is sweet as can be. I was in a very unaffectionate relationship for a long time were I eventually began feeling like sweetness was weakness. This cancer woman makes me feel the exact opposite. Sometimes I worry that I text her too much and have to be bothering her (based solely on personal insecurity). She has actually said that she enjoys the openness and communication and that she looks forward to every text...she don't have to wait long haha...

We still can't "date". As mentioned before, she's been separated for a couple years but the divorce isn't final. She moved back with her mom this summer to get everything done and back on track. Her final court date is coming up but her family won't allow her to go out until then. Kids, custody fights, it sucks but I get it...i been there.

I have been talking to her and flirting while she's at work for a couple months now, so I've just continued that. If she is working when I get off work I stop in and take a break with her. When she works nights I go up after the kids go to bed. We get a few minutes when she gets off.

She melts when I kiss her. That is a great feeling by the way, haha. I can see it in her everytime. Her smile, her eyes, the way she inches closer. When I put my hand on her cheek and bring her lips to mine, everything else fades out for a minute.

The not being able to date thing sucks.

Yesterday she said she had to work when she didn't. She got dropped off, and I came and picked her up. We had talked about doing this for a few days. After a couple weeks talking we both really wanted some time together. I joked that I've never had to work this hard for a date.

I was bringing together some plans. My kids would be at their mothers for most of her "shift". We were talking about going out for some fun and she suggested a night in...like I said, we're both home bodies.

So yeah, we had out "first date" yesterday.

I took her jacket, we talked for a little while then snuggled up to watch a movie... but I don't remember what it was about 😉 Then, all the sudden, it was dinner time. I made what she'd told me was her favorite Chinese, it was a little spicy but very good (I'm a good cook). Then I had to go pick up my kids, they hadn't eaten so I threw a pizza in for them. While my son and I were in the kitchen, my daughter and my date ran off to play some video games. Did I mention I like gamer chics? Haha.

We all just hung out for the next two hours or so. We played games and talked and laughed. That is pretty much my day to day anyway. I was worried because I feel like I was "supposed to" take her somewhere for a first date, but I know we both had a great night. It was about the kids bedtime when I had to take her back to work. My daughter told her bye and jumped up and gave her a hug, I was kinda surprised by that but she's a little sweetie like I am.

Her coworkers were teasing her when I picked her up and brought her back. Her and another lady kept running back and forth smiling and whispering. Everyone just gave her big eyes when we got back, she smiled huge and everyone started laughing. I hung out for a few minutes til when she would have gotten off like has become normal at the end of her shift. I said hello to her mother and said goodnight.

Posted by Sugarfoot
Oh my god this is so sweet. Congrats Sid! I'm glad things are going well for you both 😄. You deserve it!

I think it's a good thing that you guys are forced into taking it slower because of her situation. Slow and steady wins the race!

Yeah being forced to slow down is strange but probably good for me. I've gotten a few weird looks walking around the parking lot talking to her helping her change the trash bags and stuff haha.

It has been a lot of talking and getting to know each other. I'm liking every minute of it.

I like the slow and steady. I've said somewhere here before, that is my natural way anyhow. Things have always developed slowly for me. You see someone, you start talking and find out little things and personality. Then you start flirting and hanging out. I've never been a big "dater".

I dunno why you're worried about typical dating constructs. If your "night out" worked fine for both of you, then that's that. If she was okay with it and you were okay with it, that's all that matters, doesn't it?

I gotta say though, I find it strange that her family is dictating that she can't date and she has to sneak around like a teenager. I don't care if she has a divorce in the balance or what. It's still strange. :/

Yeah, I get that aspect of it. I just find it strange that her family is the one insisting, like she's some irresponsible teenager that will defy their wishes.

Posted by rockyroadicecream
Yeah, I get that aspect of it. I just find it strange that her family is the one insisting, like she's some irresponsible teenager that will defy their wishes.

This bothered me too honestly. Basically the court appointed 'child advocate' says no romantic interests in front of the kids. The ex had a new woman, stuff went weird... I get all that, no worries. I think a lot of it is frustration on her mom's part. When she moved back, the mom picked up the legal fees and she is paying it back.

I introduced myself to her mom one night (with her permission) while she was finishing her shift. I let her know I understood the situation. I'm a single father myself and wouldn't want to do anything to jeopardize the custody fight. I was hoping an introduction might help getting some length on the rope. It came out more as "asking permission to date your daughter". I've been told mom thought it was really sweet, she still said wait though haha. It's actually mom's boyfriend's house. He sounds like a mean southern drunk.

Yeah, that piece of the whole thing is weird. It is what it is, and it's temporary. She got her final court date the other day. End of February and that is all done. She's is planning to get her own place again this summer. I should have mine by then too.

That's kinda way down the road for anything other than the conclusion that this situation is temporary. So for now, I'll keep grabbing the time together in little chunks and the conversation in big chunks.

Posted by rockyroadicecream
I dunno why you're worried about typical dating constructs. If your "night out" worked fine for both of you, then that's that. If she was okay with it and you were okay with it, that's all that matters, doesn't it?

Yes, you are right. My worry was more before she came over. Just my mind racing, "four weeks you been looking for a 'date' and this is what you plan?" self criticism type thing ya know...

Once she was there, everything was good. I didn't want to take her back haha. We had some privacy for a few hours before the kids got back. We took full advantage of that. Then, we played and everyone was having fun like up to the minute it was time to go. My son was wanting to play a different game and that night when we were talking she said next time she'd play that with him. She wants a repeat.

It's all good. 😄

Hello Sid,

Any updates? 😄

Luna

Wow, the last thing I said was the first time she came over?! Things are wonderful.

We did that sneak over thing a few times from that first time til the end of February when the divorce was final. She don't have to sneak anymore.

I've continued going up to see her when she got off every night. The end of January, monster jam came to town and my kids wanted to go. I talked to her mom and she was able to come with us. We got to meet the drivers and get autographs. Everyone had a great night.

A month or so ago I started driving her home from work. That gave us a little more time face to face, so much had been over the phone til that point. We'd talk and laugh the twenty minute ride home, then sit in the driveway another twenty. We had a bad ice storm a few weeks ago and my house is right up the street from her work so "for safety reasons" her mom agreed and she stayed at my place. The following week they called for snow and we got flurries, we still claimed the roads to treacherous and she stayed over again haha.

And I mentioned the biggie, now that the custody and all is final we don't have the dating restrictions. We see each other almost everyday. We've taken all the kids out to play together several times. They paired up and played for hours.

I've had this same silly smile on my face for a few months now.

🙂

Ok this is my new favorite thread. So sweet!

lovely!!

Thank you for the update.
You sound so happy and I am happy for you. 🙂

Nice! I'm glad you're happy and things are out in the open now.

Wow - thats really so sweet!

Yay Sidwart! Glad you're well and happy 🙂

*warmfuzzies* 😄


My kindle shut off at the bottom of page one

o___O

I had to run to the laptop to find out What Happened.


Soo HAPPY for you, LeebraSid.

Thank you everyone 😄

I am real happy. She's very sweet.