Sssupes
@Sssupes
9 Years1,000+ PostsLeo
Comments: 82 · Posts: 2348 · Topics: 51
Would you?
Posted by ElleDuMondeBlood tests say I am.
how do you know you are a match?
Posted by ElleDuMondeDick move? I have considered it. That's why I got tested. However, as I've explained to her, that I have lots to consider. She understands this fully.Posted by SssupesIf you had no intention of giving her a kidney if the blood tests proved a match.....why offer to take the tests?Posted by ElleDuMondeBlood tests say I am.
how do you know you are a match?
That's kind of a dick move, ssupes.
false hope and all that.
click to expand
Your risk is death? You think you'd die in the process of donating? Or down the road with one kidney left?
I've thought of this too, funnily enough. I'm down for the idea overall, but then I pause because it leaves me with one and god forbid something happen to me where I need that one and now I'm SOL.
It's a pretty big decision to make though, that's for sure.
I've thought of this too, funnily enough. I'm down for the idea overall, but then I pause because it leaves me with one and god forbid something happen to me where I need that one and now I'm SOL.
It's a pretty big decision to make though, that's for sure.
Posted by rockyroadicecreamBoth scenarios actually. What if in the future my kids need one and I couldn't provide it? What if I die on the table?
Your risk is death? You think you'd die in the process of donating? Or down the road with one kidney left?
I've thought of this too, funnily enough. I'm down for the idea overall, but then I pause because it leaves me with one and god forbid something happen to me where I need that one and now I'm SOL.
It's a pretty big decision to make though, that's for sure.
You're a good person to consider making such a sacrifice for your friend. The world could use more people like you.
Not if I had kids... certainly not if I was the Sole Provider.
Its not about you.
On the other hand, death is certain so...
I'm going to say no but its quite the dilemma.
Its not about you.
On the other hand, death is certain so...
I'm going to say no but its quite the dilemma.
It's a huge decision. What do your family members say? How old are your kids?
Posted by SpiceNSugar7 and 11. Haven't discussed it with them yet. They don't even know I got tested.
It's a huge decision. What do your family members say? How old are your kids?
Posted by SssupesThe opinion of close family members is most important because they have the most to lose if something were to happen to you... God forbid!Posted by SpiceNSugar7 and 11. Haven't discussed it with them yet. They don't even know I got tested.
It's a huge decision. What do your family members say? How old are your kids?click to expand
Look to them for answers.
Posted by Sssupesif you were 11 or 7 and you loved and was close to your father, wouldn't you feel outraged that he would make a decision like that, knowing that he might leave you behind? with no one to care for you?Posted by SpiceNSugar7 and 11. Haven't discussed it with them yet. They don't even know I got tested.
It's a huge decision. What do your family members say? How old are your kids?click to expand
take care of your own family first before trying to take care of others is a good motto.
edit - to be honest I don't admire this kind of thing, especially if you have children underage.
some women would be repulsed.
Posted by SssupesDon't waste your energy on people who like attention.... The fact that you made a thread asking us if you should give away one of your kidneys.. Shows that your a good person.. & the fact that you have considered (despite your situation) giving your friend one of your kidneys... Speaks VOLUME!!!Posted by ElleDuMondeDick move? I have considered it. That's why I got tested. However, as I've explained to her, that I have lots to consider. She understands this fully.Posted by SssupesIf you had no intention of giving her a kidney if the blood tests proved a match.....why offer to take the tests?Posted by ElleDuMondeBlood tests say I am.
how do you know you are a match?
That's kind of a dick move, ssupes.
false hope and all that.
click to expand
Now personally I think you shouldn't give it to your friend b/c you have children and the possibility is "DEATH!!!!"
However, I think that you should explain to your friend how you would like to help them but b/c of the different possibilities (which includes death) you wouldnt be able to donate.. & Then from there explain the different reasons for why you couldn't donate..
But again.. The fact that you considered the donations shows you have a great heart.. Good luck to your friend
Posted by lisabethur8I feel ya lisa. Don't think I haven't thought about this too. Then I think "what if it was me"? What if I needed one?Posted by Sssupesif you were 11 or 7 and you loved and was close to your father, wouldn't you feel outraged that he would make a decision like that, knowing that he might leave you behind? with no one to care for you?Posted by SpiceNSugar7 and 11. Haven't discussed it with them yet. They don't even know I got tested.
It's a huge decision. What do your family members say? How old are your kids?
take care of your own family first before trying to take care of others is a good motto.
edit - to be honest I don't admire this kind of thing, especially if you have children underage.
some women would be repulsed.click to expand
Posted by DeeLovesRedI know Elle means well.Posted by SssupesDon't waste your energy on people who like attention.... The fact that you made a thread asking us if you should give away one of your kidneys.. Shows that your a good person.. & the fact that you have considered (despite your situation) giving your friend one of your kidneys... Speaks VOLUME!!!Posted by ElleDuMondeDick move? I have considered it. That's why I got tested. However, as I've explained to her, that I have lots to consider. She understands this fully.Posted by SssupesIf you had no intention of giving her a kidney if the blood tests proved a match.....why offer to take the tests?Posted by ElleDuMondeBlood tests say I am.
how do you know you are a match?
That's kind of a dick move, ssupes.
false hope and all that.
Now personally I think you shouldn't give it to your friend b/c you have children and the possibility is "DEATH!!!!"
However, I think that you should explain to your friend how you would like to help them but b/c of the different possibilities (which includes death) you wouldnt be able to donate.. & Then from there explain the different reasons for why you couldn't donate..
But again.. The fact that you considered the donations shows you have a great heart.. Good luck to your friendclick to expand
Thank you for the kind words
Posted by Sssupesthe bonds of you and your children are supposed to be stronger. you have to think of them first, because they need you. This woman, i'm sorry, but she should not even burden you with that kind of thing if she knew you had little children. That's really quite unfair. there are thousands of other donors out there with no family to take care of.Posted by lisabethur8I feel ya lisa. Don't think I haven't thought about this too. Then I think "what if it was me"? What if I needed one?Posted by Sssupesif you were 11 or 7 and you loved and was close to your father, wouldn't you feel outraged that he would make a decision like that, knowing that he might leave you behind? with no one to care for you?Posted by SpiceNSugar7 and 11. Haven't discussed it with them yet. They don't even know I got tested.
It's a huge decision. What do your family members say? How old are your kids?
take care of your own family first before trying to take care of others is a good motto.
edit - to be honest I don't admire this kind of thing, especially if you have children underage.
some women would be repulsed.
click to expand
edit - I re read your op and she knew you all your life... well. jeeez. why would she burden you with that kind of responsibility?? that's selfish of her.
Posted by lisabethur8She didn't ask me lisa. I asked her because she keeps going on dialysis. She has 3 kids.Posted by Sssupesthe bonds of you and your children are supposed to be stronger. you have to think of them first, because they need you. This woman, i'm sorry, but she should not even burden you with that kind of thing if she knew you had little children. That's really quite unfair. there are thousands of other donors out there with no family to take care of.Posted by lisabethur8I feel ya lisa. Don't think I haven't thought about this too. Then I think "what if it was me"? What if I needed one?Posted by Sssupesif you were 11 or 7 and you loved and was close to your father, wouldn't you feel outraged that he would make a decision like that, knowing that he might leave you behind? with no one to care for you?Posted by SpiceNSugar7 and 11. Haven't discussed it with them yet. They don't even know I got tested.
It's a huge decision. What do your family members say? How old are your kids?
take care of your own family first before trying to take care of others is a good motto.
edit - to be honest I don't admire this kind of thing, especially if you have children underage.
some women would be repulsed.
edit - I re read your op and she knew you all your life... well. jeeez. why would she burden you with that kind of responsibility?? that's selfish of her.
click to expand
Posted by Sssupespersonally you still need to think about your children. but it sounds ilke you want to waver to the other side and help out, other people, and I know you said she's a good friend and a nice person,but it is NOT your responsibility. are you gonna count on your children to be grateful that you did it for others?? you better hope that they are very understanding but childen do not think of these things, because they are not adults, and they need firsthand your guidance and you to be there. so honestly you're gonna get a lot of trauma and pent up hatred from them because they will not understand.they will see you as a good person trying to be good for others but you were never there for them, they might in the future go through therapy because they were left to strangers. something you have to consider future-wise for your children. If they were adults, then it would be different, then you can have this heart to heart talk to them about leaving this world.Posted by lisabethur8She didn't ask me lisa. I asked her because she keeps going on dialysis. She has 3 kids.Posted by Sssupesthe bonds of you and your children are supposed to be stronger. you have to think of them first, because they need you. This woman, i'm sorry, but she should not even burden you with that kind of thing if she knew you had little children. That's really quite unfair. there are thousands of other donors out there with no family to take care of.Posted by lisabethur8I feel ya lisa. Don't think I haven't thought about this too. Then I think "what if it was me"? What if I needed one?Posted by Sssupesif you were 11 or 7 and you loved and was close to your father, wouldn't you feel outraged that he would make a decision like that, knowing that he might leave you behind? with no one to care for you?Posted by SpiceNSugar7 and 11. Haven't discussed it with them yet. They don't even know I got tested.
It's a huge decision. What do your family members say? How old are your kids?
take care of your own family first before trying to take care of others is a good motto.
edit - to be honest I don't admire this kind of thing, especially if you have children underage.
some women would be repulsed.
edit - I re read your op and she knew you all your life... well. jeeez. why would she burden you with that kind of responsibility?? that's selfish of her.
click to expand
Posted by Vixen2I'm asking for the emotional viewpoint.
There are always some risks...
However...perhaps, instead of speaking with us
You speak with a Nephrologist that would be able to answer all your questions appropriately.
I have seen this done several times and know several people who are living just fine today with their one kidney.
I think your soul already knows what you are meant to do.
Posted by 2MoonPosted by SensitiveBlues
NO!
op, whats her-his sign?
if she is a cancer.. DONT do it. not worth it
click to expand
Bahahaha! That's harsh!
Posted by lisabethur8Posted by SssupesPosted by lisabethur8Posted by Sssupesthe bonds of you and your children are supposed to be stronger. you have to think of them first, because they need you. This woman, i'm sorry, but she should not even burden you with that kind of thing if she knew you had little children. That's really quite unfair. there are thousands of other donors out there with no family to take care of.Posted by lisabethur8I feel ya lisa. Don't think I haven't thought about this too. Then I think "what if it was me"? What if I needed one?Posted by Sssupesif you were 11 or 7 and you loved and was close to your father, wouldn't you feel outraged that he would make a decision like that, knowing that he might leave you behind? with no one to care for you?Posted by SpiceNSugar7 and 11. Haven't discussed it with them yet. They don't even know I got tested.
It's a huge decision. What do your family members say? How old are your kids?
take care of your own family first before trying to take care of others is a good motto.
edit - to be honest I don't admire this kind of thing, especially if you have children underage.
some women would be repulsed.
edit - I re read your op and she knew you all your life... well. jeeez. why would she burden you with that kind of responsibility?? that's selfish of her.
click to expand
personally you still need to think about your children. but it sounds ilke you want to waver to the other side and help out, other people, and I know you said she's a good friend and a nice person,but it is NOT your responsibility. are you gonna count on your children to be grateful that you did it for others?? you better hope that they are very understanding but childen do not think of these things, because they are not adults, and they need firsthand your guidance and you to be there. so honestly you're gonna get a lot of trauma and pent up hatred from them because they will not understand.they will see you as a good person trying to be good for others but you were never there for them, they might in the future go through therapy because they were left to strangers. something you have to consider future-wise for your children. If they were adults, then it would be different, then you can have this heart to heart talk to them about leaving
Then there's this too. Good point.
There are long term ramifications, he'll have to change his diet, watch his weight. It's not donate and then live free.
i wouldn't let my hubby do that even without kids unless it's for his immediate family and this person is about to die tomorrow
yes i'm selfish. sue me
yes i'm selfish. sue me
Yes
How common/rare is your/her blood type?
Is she on a waiting list?
Is she on a waiting list?
I don't think I'd do it even for my close family, I have to think of ways to avoid this lol
I Would never give anything from inside of me
I Would never give anything from inside of me
This only happens once in your lifetime.
There are people that die on the waiting list waiting to find a match.
It's also important that at your age they probly wouldn't use your kidney on your kids IF they needed it.
Older donors organs are more likely to fail.
There are people that die on the waiting list waiting to find a match.
It's also important that at your age they probly wouldn't use your kidney on your kids IF they needed it.
Older donors organs are more likely to fail.
I would. I have a friend who needs one but I'm not a match......and because I have lupus I'm automatically not allowed to donate.
that is such a tough decision - what does your spouse think ?
Posted by tctaI'm single.
that is such a tough decision - what does your spouse think ?
Posted by MoonArtistYou have a special circumstance.
I would. I have a friend who needs one but I'm not a match......and because I have lupus I'm automatically not allowed to donate.
I have no doubt you would moonie.
no, I would not
Posted by Sssupesthat's tough - wow ...Posted by tctaI'm single.
that is such a tough decision - what does your spouse think ?click to expand
Posted by SssupesThere is a lot more involved than "blood tests".Posted by ElleDuMondeBlood tests say I am.
how do you know you are a match?
click to expand
The evaluation process for living kidney donation takes months and many tests, to determine if the donor is healthy enough to donate a kidney and would be a good match for the potential recipient. The living donor candidate must meet with a healthcare team during the evaluation process, including nephrologists, transplant surgeons, clinical nurse specialists, nurse practitioners, social workers, transplant coordinators, cardiologists, psychologists and psychiatrists.
Have you done all of that?
As for the article, "UCSF Medical Center suspends living kidney donor program after donor death" they failed to report the statistics on how many living donor transplants were conducted for the same 16-year time period. Here are the stats for 2014: "In 2014, 17,107 kidney transplants took place in the US. Of these, 11,570 came from deceased donors and 5,537 came from living donors."
https://www.kidney.org/news/newsroom/factsheets/Organ-Donation-and-Transplantation-Stats
The odds are more than in your favour, that you would lead a full and healthy life, should you actually be a real match and decide to go ahead with it. That's a really personal decision though.
Posted by tamaraI haven't gone that far as to consult with those folks, yet. So far, blood wise, health wise and cellular wise, I'm a match. Now, if I actually decide that I wanna risk it, then I've been informed that there will be several more tests done, including a biopsy.Posted by SssupesThere is a lot more involved than "blood tests".Posted by ElleDuMondeBlood tests say I am.
how do you know you are a match?
The evaluation process for living kidney donation takes months and many tests, to determine if the donor is healthy enough to donate a kidney and would be a good match for the potential recipient. The living donor candidate must meet with a healthcare team during the evaluation process, including nephrologists, transplant surgeons, clinical nurse specialists, nurse practitioners, social workers, transplant coordinators, cardiologists, psychologists and psychiatrists.
Have you done all of that?
As for the article, "UCSF Medical Center suspends living kidney donor program after donor death" they failed to report the statistics on how many living donor transplants were conducted for the same 16-year time period. Here are the stats for 2014: "In 2014, 17,107 kidney transplants took place in the US. Of these, 11,570 came from deceased donors and 5,537 came from living donors."
https://www.kidney.org/news/newsroom/factsheets/Organ-Donation-and-Transplantation-Stats
The odds are more than in your favour, that you would lead a full and healthy life, should you actually be a real match and decide to go ahead with it. That's a really personal decision though.click to expand
I'm asking "would you", not "what it entails". Thanks though.
Posted by SssupesSo, you are not a confirmed match, contrary to what you posted earlier. Let us know when and if you ever do the testing , making this hypothetical scenario real.Posted by tamaraI haven't gone that far as to consult with those folks, yet.So far, blood wise, health wise and cellular wise, I'm a match. Now, if I actually decide that I wanna risk it, then I've been informed that there will be several more tests done, including a biopsy.Posted by SssupesThere is a lot more involved than "blood tests".Posted by ElleDuMondeBlood tests say I am.
how do you know you are a match?
The evaluation process for living kidney donation takes months and many tests, to determine if the donor is healthy enough to donate a kidney and would be a good match for the potential recipient. The living donor candidate must meet with a healthcare team during the evaluation process, including nephrologists, transplant surgeons, clinical nurse specialists, nurse practitioners, social workers, transplant coordinators, cardiologists, psychologists and psychiatrists.
Have you done all of that?
As for the article, "UCSF Medical Center suspends living kidney donor program after donor death" they failed to report the statistics on how many living donor transplants were conducted for the same 16-year time period. Here are the stats for 2014: "In 2014, 17,107 kidney transplants took place in the US. Of these, 11,570 came from deceased donors and 5,537 came from living donors."
https://www.kidney.org/news/newsroom/factsheets/Organ-Donation-and-Transplantation-Stats
The odds are more than in your favour, that you would lead a full and healthy life, should you actually be a real match and decide to go ahead with it. That's a really personal decision though.
I'm asking "would you", not "what it entails". Thanks though.
click to expand
And would I? Yes.
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Would you even consider it? She's a pretty good friend I've known my whole life.