@haffo
21 Years5,000+ Posts
Haffo, healing power & teaching ability . . is TWO different aspects.
We learn from our errors, not our successes.
We find healing in our remorse, rather than our ignorances.
So, I would say that revenge would be the better teacher, while forgiveness would provide the healing we need.
Missed ya . . where ya been? Welcome back.
🙂
It's all fine now. I will be back in track in couple of days.
Message posted by: haffo on 1/14/2007 10:53:09 AM ip: xxx.xxx.xxx.56
It's all fine now. I will be back in track in couple of days.
Wonderful . . I'm glad whatever it is you've been embracing has brought you to a better place . . talk to you in a couple days.
"Why grieve for those for whom no grief is due, and yet profess
wisdom? The wise grieve neither for the dead nor the living.
For death is as sure for that which is born, as birth is for that which is dead. Therefore grieve not for what is inevitable."
U heal the world by doing what is dutiful.
"Forgiveness vs. Revenge"
forgiveness after I've gotten my revenge.
"forgiveness after I've gotten my revenge"
lol, best answer so far
Feeling revenge is very human, and may be satisfying for some, but short-lived deep down, where it counts. Whereas in forgiveness, although you may NEVER forget 'WHAT' was done to you or someone else, you can in time forgive the person as a 'human being' and truly then, begin to heal yourself, and move on to bigger and better things. i think in the end, forgiveness teaches the most, because only then can you vibrate to a higher power. Revenge causes bitterness, and bitterness in time can eat away at your heart, and make you weaker 'in spirit.
-Forgiveness is not 'admitting' what another did was right, only opening your heart to the 'power of healing.'
-hey, welcome back, haffo..
Forgiveness does several great things, including making your enemies unhappier. They'll have trouble hating you or at the very least confusion over it when they see and understand you've no longer got any investment in the game. That strips them of their power over you and also leaves you open to put energy into more positive, life-affirming activities.
I used to be a vengeful person, to some extent. Certainly didn't mind acting out, until it hit me that doing this was just creating negative energy in my own life and not enabling me to heal from whatever hurt or harm was done.
JD, I'm surprised at your answer. Why revenge? There are cases where justice is called for and in that case, justice in a way can be revenge.
P-Angel, we can learn from successes too. Though I think we tend to learn more from mistakes. I agree with everything else you've said.
Forgiveness heals when you know what you are forgiving or apologizing for. Revenge, I dunno... seems to harden people.
very very interesting.
i see what you're saying. it's actually happened to me before and you're right... i did learn a lot.
my only objection is that not everyone learns the lesson they are supposed to. what does the one exacting revenge get out of it?
"You are absolutely right .... we have lessons to learn from all our experiences."
Third . . that motion.
Even the smallest little thing has meaning to us in some way . . it's a matter of how we apply it to our lives . . it can be a road block, or a building tool . . depends on us and what we want in our lives.
It's natural to indulge in vengeful thoughts and emotions; they can always be altered, unlike the act itself.
I wish more schools would teach "conflict resolution" like the Quaker Friends schools do. We could learn so much by learning the fine act of dealing with the gritty reality human psychology rather than allowing hostile emotions fester.
I recommend the following book - FORGIVENESS AND OTHER ACTS OF LOVE by Stephanie Dowrick.
http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_ss_gw/105-6654718-9746829?url=search-alias% 3Dstripbooks&field-keywords=FORGIVENESS+AND+OTHER+ACTS+OF+LOVE+by+Stephanie+Dowrick.&Go.x=12&Go.y=11
I guess, like anything else in life, if you're going to forgive or if you're going to be vindictive then you can only count on it being for yourself. We can only hope whoever's been forgiven or had their come uppance get's the meaning. If you're going to do big acts like forgiving or avenging then apparently you care enough about whoever, you care about your feelings in relation to that person. Almost like silent pleas to make you somehow matter more to them and them matter more to you if maybe they own up to themselves. Admitting to that can be sweet release. There are people that I know that I have forgiven and it has been for my own peace of mind and yes, healing. It's not been about them, but me. JD's right... I can NOT trust that the person I forgive will understand that their actions aren't ok just because I forgive them. I tend to forgive, never forget, learn a lesson, and whomever I've forgiven has a new place in my life... somehow and in some aspect less than where they were before and it only takes time and effort for them to redeem themselves if they even care to. I never hold my breath. Whether thats right or not, I dunno. While I may move on healed or in the process of being healed, there's a lesson that goes with everything and for everyone.
"I guess we can justify what we do for whatever reason, but really every action has a vibration meaning that we effect others by our actions."
It certainly sets a tone for relationships and it gives you a certain aura. hrmmmmm... I'll have to think more about this.
😛 I know. I was actually agreeing with that. You put yourself out there, or the idea, or the lesson or whatever... whether they bite at it, chew it, swallow, spit some out, whatever is all up to them. indeed, by their free will or conviction of character. yep, this i know. I'm saying that I forgive for my own benefit also knowing that others have something to gain from it as well. simply their choice.
🙂 I'm telling you, the world would be so much more peaceful! lol
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Which one you think has more healing power?
Which one you think has more powerful teaching ability for the side who has caused sh1t?