LittleMissPerfect
@LittleMissPerfect
11 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 185 · Topics: 11
Polite guys are the worst
LOL @ these responses.
Posted by BullShitNo, they weren't polite and that was my whole point.
If they faded away were they really polite? Or were they IDGAF guys in a polite disguise? Something to think about.
No, if they were IDGAF they wouldn't use any disguise because they don't care how they are perceived.
My point is when someone does care how is perceived and take it to the extreme of being super polite are hypocrites, in the sense they want to give the image of a good guy when in fact they aren't.
Posted by GobshiteI never understood the concept of "getting screwed over". Nobody put a gun on my head, as you said I choose to date this guys, so I take responsibility for my choices. I choose wrong.
Wait until you get screwed over by a IDGAF guy. Maybe then you'll sing a different tune...
Just drop the princess complex and get on with it. No-one said dating was going to be a bed of roses.
As a woman, you have it a damn sight easier than men - all you have to do is choose wisely.
My post was ranting about people who pretend something they are not, in the future if someone approaches me with over polite ways I will be extra careful, that's all.
I dropped the princess complex the minute I started working in order to get everything I have, thank you very much.
And I'm not even going to start with who has it easier in this world.
Posted by BullShitWhile that is perfect in theory the practice is what I find difficult. How do you realize in the early stages of knowing someone if they are mature or not? Specially when some people put a lot of effort in appearing something they are not?Posted by LittleMissPerfectSo they weren't polite people in the first place. I think you shouldn't focus on polite or idgaf but more on mature. Mature guys will embody a balance of a healthy individual.Posted by BullShitNo, they weren't polite and that was my whole point.
If they faded away were they really polite? Or were they IDGAF guys in a polite disguise? Something to think about.
No, if they were IDGAF they wouldn't use any disguise because they don't care how they are perceived.
My point is when someone does care how is perceived and take it to the extreme of being super polite are hypocrites, in the sense they want to give the image of a good guy when in fact they aren't.click to expand
Posted by BullShitYou did it again.. Made a great point.
If they faded away were they really polite? Or were they IDGAF guys in a polite disguise? Something to think about.
Oh the dating world... what a mess it can be...
^ Whatever *roll eyes"
I have been thinking and you know what? At the end if the day it doesn't really matter.
If you want to fade away fine, sure as hell I'm not going to chase you and I will continue dating other people. I'm not a pollyanna who is going to sit by the phone waiting for a call. Sayonara.
If you want to fade away fine, sure as hell I'm not going to chase you and I will continue dating other people. I'm not a pollyanna who is going to sit by the phone waiting for a call. Sayonara.
Posted by ImpulsvAgree, that is why I respect them, but for some reason my friends hate this guys, oh well, nevermind.Posted by LittleMissPerfectThat description of a bad guy is actually a directed guy not a bad boy.
After many years of being by myself I started dating again (even made a tread about it).
After many months of dating different guys, I have noticed that the "good guys" the overly polite, considerate guys are the worst, instead of saying "hey I'm not feeling this, wish you the best" they slowly fade away.
On the other hand, the bad guys, the IDGAF about being politically correct guys are the ones who did said "I want this, I don't want that, I'm sorry if I hurt you" (and meant it).
I get that we only date a few times and they don't "own" me anything but if you present yourself as polite and considerate then you should do the polite and considerate thing.
Then my friends wonder why I have more respect for the IDGAF guys, at least they were honest...
And yes, I'm aware that I said "polite and considerate" way too many times, I was just making a point.click to expand
Posted by ImpulsvYup, like I said in the future I'll be extra careful and don't take face value. Leason learned (I hope).Posted by LittleMissPerfectThat's why it is for us to observe n take our time. As a Scorpio I never based on what the presentPosted by GobshiteI never understood the concept of "getting screwed over". Nobody put a gun on my head, as you said I choose to date this guys, so I take responsibility for my choices. I choose wrong.
Wait until you get screwed over by a IDGAF guy. Maybe then you'll sing a different tune...
Just drop the princess complex and get on with it. No-one said dating was going to be a bed of roses.
As a woman, you have it a damn sight easier than men - all you have to do is choose wisely.
My post was ranting about people who pretend something they are not, in the future if someone approaches me with over polite ways I will be extra careful, that's all.
I dropped the princess complex the minute I started working in order to get everything I have, thank you very much.
And I'm not even going to start with who has it easier in this world.
Time tells what they are really about.
I'm not going to say of the bat they are presenting fake but I'm going to continue to observe n see if it is a long time behavior
It is human nature to be in ones best behavior even genuinely because u like someoneclick to expand
Your ideas are very black and white. The problem with fixed signs. It will be your down fall. Just like you, people can not be shoved into neat little boxes, categorized, and tied away with a neat bow. People are more complex and complicated. People have their reasons for doing what they do, even if they don't understand it themselves. To expect people to work around your convenience is very selfish and self-centered.
Posted by LittleMissPerfect
I have been thinking and you know what? At the end if the day it doesn't really matter.
If you want to fade away fine, sure as hell I'm not going to chase you and I will continue dating other people. I'm not a pollyanna who is going to sit by the phone waiting for a call. Sayonara.
It sounds like you did not have complete control of the situation and that's why you are angry.
Posted by someoneeeeExcellent advice and well said.
I can totally relate to this.
But when dating these various type of guys, you slowly start to realise, who is authentic and genuinely interested in you and who is not.
Also, what I have learnt from my dating experiences, you need to identify your basic needs and boundaries. If someone doesn't meet your needs, drop them.
If you currently feel disappointed by guys, maybe you should take a break. That's what I'm doing.
Posted by GobshiteYour posts make me laugh Cap
Wait until you get screwed over by a IDGAF guy. Maybe then you'll sing a different tune...
Just drop the princess complex and get on with it. No-one said dating was going to be a bed of roses.
As a woman, you have it a damn sight easier than men - all you have to do is choose wisely.
@LittleMissPerfect -I understand what you're saying about the IDGAF guys. I rather get honesty. The polite guys are just that. Too polite . They don't want to hurt u in any way but end up still hurting you because they slowly fade away. In the end, the IDGAF guys in relationships are the worst
Posted by LittleMissPerfectWait. Now I'm just confused . Eh lolPosted by BullShitNo, they weren't polite and that was my whole point.
If they faded away were they really polite? Or were they IDGAF guys in a polite disguise? Something to think about.
No, if they were IDGAF they wouldn't use any disguise because they don't care how they are perceived.
My point is when someone does care how is perceived and take it to the extreme of being super polite are hypocrites, in the sense they want to give the image of a good guy when in fact they aren't.click to expand
I already got the answer I was looking for.
You guys feel free to talk about whatever that you want to talk. Bye!
You guys feel free to talk about whatever that you want to talk. Bye!
Posted by scorpx3I used to say that to my husband when we were dating. I'd tell him that he hurt my feelings. true story.Posted by LittleMissPerfectI agree with you.
After many years of being by myself I started dating again (even made a tread about it).
After many months of dating different guys, I have noticed that the "good guys" the overly polite, considerate guys are the worst, instead of saying "hey I'm not feeling this, wish you the best" they slowly fade away.
On the other hand, the bad guys, the IDGAF about being politically correct guys are the ones who did said "I want this, I don't want that, I'm sorry if I hurt you" (and meant it).
I get that we only date a few times and they don't "own" me anything but if you present yourself as polite and considerate then you should do the polite and considerate thing.
Then my friends wonder why I have more respect for the IDGAF guys, at least they were honest...
And yes, I'm aware that I said "polite and considerate" way too many times, I was just making a point.
Of my ex's, my current boyfriend (Scorpio) is probably the most brutally honest and forward about everything. At first I didn't like what seemed like his insensitivity towards my feelings but I soon realized he's just being himself, his realest self, with all his purest (pure as in raw although not always good) intentions. After mentioning to him a few times, please be sensitive, he has been a lot more sweet and will try to communicate with me honestly still just without the rough edges - which makes me happy since progress is progress haha. But I prefer his abrasiveness over a nice guy's behavior, as the nice guys do tend to be very fickle.
Honesty is a HUGE plus in my book...so...
click to expand
but i'm so goddamned drawn to him like a moth to a flame. finally, he tells me, "but honey you have so many feelings to hurt."
Fucker.
sigh.
some of us are masochists. 😛
I still say it to him. "that's mean!!!"
him: "But you love it. and I know that you love it."
:: GIggles happily:
I still say it to him. "that's mean!!!"
him: "But you love it. and I know that you love it."
:: GIggles happily:
Posted by lisabethur8I can totally understand where you are coming from...
some of us are masochists. 😛
I still say it to him. "that's mean!!!"
him: "But you love it. and I know that you love it."
:: GIggles happily:
Posted by LittleMissPerfectI agree. Idgaf=honest vs overly polite=insecure.
After many years of being by myself I started dating again (even made a tread about it).
After many months of dating different guys, I have noticed that the "good guys" the overly polite, considerate guys are the worst, instead of saying "hey I'm not feeling this, wish you the best" they slowly fade away.
On the other hand, the bad guys, the IDGAF about being politically correct guys are the ones who did said "I want this, I don't want that, I'm sorry if I hurt you" (and meant it).
I get that we only date a few times and they don't "own" me anything but if you present yourself as polite and considerate then you should do the polite and considerate thing.
Then my friends wonder why I have more respect for the IDGAF guys, at least they were honest...
And yes, I'm aware that I said "polite and considerate" way too many times, I was just making a point.
Now I'm speaking from the context in which I perceive what you speak.
lol
Of course, it should be completely realized by the viewing audience that if a guy really rejected her to her face, without any regard to her feelings .... then her song in here would be totally difference and filled with rage at how rude the guy was.
It's a shame that the new-age adult with emotional intelligence is a 27 year old.
Sounds to me like your motivation in making this thread is get validated for excusing a bad boys behavior, so you can continue being with a guy who's treating you like shit.
there's some serious brain damaged people here ... if they actually believe that bad is the good guy, and nice is the bad guy
Posted by scorpx3Posted by lisabethur8Lol. No. Just no.
some of us are masochists. 😛
I still say it to him. "that's mean!!!"
him: "But you love it. and I know that you love it."
:: GIggles happily:
Posted by Arielle83😆 heehee.Posted by lisabethur8That's annoying.
some of us are masochists. 😛
I still say it to him. "that's mean!!!"
him: "But you love it. and I know that you love it."
:: GIggles happily:click to expand
Sweetheart, oh clueless one, the guys you described are "nice" guys. They aren't nice or good at all. They just appear to be. Their actions say otherwise.
These "bad" guys are just being honest. Your silly female emotions just cannot tolerate honesty that dings your ego so you get pissy and think they're mean.
Of course, it depends on how they go about it, but in the long haul, honesty goes a long way and gets more respect.
These shitty asshats who do the "fade" are the biggest assholes out there. They go out in dating, treat it as a check list- "I did x,y,z, therefore, I'm entitled." When shit gets real, they backpedal, come up with weak excuses, and/or fade off into the sunset because they're immature and do not have the balls or respect to be honest with you.
It sounds like you have a lot to learn about guys, dating, and the like. ESPECIALLY considering you think honest guys are "bad" and these twatwaffles you've experienced with their fading are "nice."
Get your shit together and educate yourself better.
These "bad" guys are just being honest. Your silly female emotions just cannot tolerate honesty that dings your ego so you get pissy and think they're mean.
Of course, it depends on how they go about it, but in the long haul, honesty goes a long way and gets more respect.
These shitty asshats who do the "fade" are the biggest assholes out there. They go out in dating, treat it as a check list- "I did x,y,z, therefore, I'm entitled." When shit gets real, they backpedal, come up with weak excuses, and/or fade off into the sunset because they're immature and do not have the balls or respect to be honest with you.
It sounds like you have a lot to learn about guys, dating, and the like. ESPECIALLY considering you think honest guys are "bad" and these twatwaffles you've experienced with their fading are "nice."
Get your shit together and educate yourself better.
Posted by GobshiteNo, sweetie, no.
Wait until you get screwed over by a IDGAF guy. Maybe then you'll sing a different tune...
Just drop the princess complex and get on with it. No-one said dating was going to be a bed of roses.
As a woman, you have it a damn sight easier than men - all you have to do is choose wisely.
don't the idgaf guys get you hooked on heroin?
Posted by LittleMissPerfectI agree to an extent. I won't label but I will just say that any man who doesn't say it straight when he cuts you loose, is just not a good guy. At least give the person some closure. Ignoring and disregarding the feelings of another is not polite nor is it kind. If you're not interested or not wanting to continue something then at least let the other person know before you do a Houdini.
After many years of being by myself I started dating again (even made a tread about it).
After many months of dating different guys, I have noticed that the "good guys" the overly polite, considerate guys are the worst, instead of saying "hey I'm not feeling this, wish you the best" they slowly fade away.
On the other hand, the bad guys, the IDGAF about being politically correct guys are the ones who did said "I want this, I don't want that, I'm sorry if I hurt you" (and meant it).
I get that we only date a few times and they don't "own" me anything but if you present yourself as polite and considerate then you should do the polite and considerate thing.
Then my friends wonder why I have more respect for the IDGAF guys, at least they were honest...
And yes, I'm aware that I said "polite and considerate" way too many times, I was just making a point.
Posted by LittleMissPerfectI'm sorry and not trying to disrespect you, but you may want to reconsider what you're saying. I understand that you might have had a few bad experiences, but you shouldn't stereotype people based on labeling them as a "good" or "bad" guys. I really suggest that .....
After many years of being by myself I started dating again (even made a tread about it).
After many months of dating different guys, I have noticed that the "good guys" the overly polite, considerate guys are the worst, instead of saying "hey I'm not feeling this, wish you the best" they slowly fade away.
On the other hand, the bad guys, the IDGAF about being politically correct guys are the ones who did said "I want this, I don't want that, I'm sorry if I hurt you" (and meant it).
I get that we only date a few times and they don't "own" me anything but if you present yourself as polite and considerate then you should do the polite and considerate thing.
Then my friends wonder why I have more respect for the IDGAF guys, at least they were honest...
And yes, I'm aware that I said "polite and considerate" way too many times, I was just making a point.
(cut for length)
I have an ex who was a dipshit and a "nice guy" (learned that after the fact), but at least he had the balls to sit me down and break it off. I still think he's a tard and has issues, but I appreciated he was a man about it and faced me when we split and that it wasn't via text or a fade.
Hearing the truth from a dude can suck and it stings when reality hits you in the face, but in the long run, it is FAR more healthy to cope with than some delusional shit. It's why I have so little tolerance for the stupid bitches that come here, expecting coddling advice or the silly bitches who give that delusional, coddling advice. Our own gender working against us is just as bad as having to fight off the shady assholes in dating.
The overall message is just don't tolerate someone treating you less than your worth. The end.
Crabby ass gobby is always the first in line to do the classic, entitled, clueless male bit in dating- woman comes here with an issue to analyze between the sexes, and he's immediately pointing out how bad guys have it instead. In this case, he sided with the (obviously) pseudo "nice" guy. He relates to those saps, so he takes immediate offense (hence assuming she's a princess for having standards against douchelords). Maybe he should take his own advice and choose wisely. He sounds like he hasn't and it's made him sound like a total fuckboy.
But whatever, I generally don't care, but it's getting real old seeing the same, whiner response from him. He could probably learn more from guys like you and BulllShit.
Posted by ImTheRamAgreed. And that's the issue with some women. They're so fucking stupid and insecure that they'd rather live a lie if it means their emotional security appears fine.
...
Hey..at least a honest guy will allways be...you know..honest...? I wonder what more can a woman ask of a man !!....
Some woman are so insecure that they wold rather live in a lie...but im not the one to judge tbh...we all have our insecurities...we all grow up..we all learn with our mistakes.
But please...do not say a man/woman that is a liar is better then a "idgaf" person..just don't...
I have an ex who was a dipshit and a "nice guy" (learned that after the fact), but at least he had the balls to sit me down and break it off. I still think he's a tard and has issues, but I appreciated he was a man about it and faced me when we split and that it wasn't via text or a fade.
Hearing the truth from a dude can suck and it stings when reality hits you in the face, but in the long run, it is FAR more healthy to cope with than some delusional shit. It's why I have so little tolerance for the stupid bitches that come here, expecting coddling advice or the silly bitches who give that delusional, coddling advice. Our own gender working against us is just as bad as having to fight off the shady assholes in dating.
The overall message is just don't tolerate someone treating you less than your worth. The end.
Crabby ass gobby is always the first in line to do the classic, entitled, clueless male bit in dating- woman comes here with an issue to analyze between the sexes, and he's immediately pointing out how bad guys have it instead. In this case, he sided with the (obviously) pseudo "nice" guy. He relates to those saps, so he takes immediate offense (hence assuming she's a princess for having standards against douchelords). Maybe he should take his own advice and choose wisely. He sounds like he hasn't and it's made him sound like a total fuckboy.
But whatever, I generally don't care, but it's getting real old seeing the same, whiner response from him. He could probably learn more from guys like you and BulllShit.
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After many months of dating different guys, I have noticed that the "good guys" the overly polite, considerate guys are the worst, instead of saying "hey I'm not feeling this, wish you the best" they slowly fade away.
On the other hand, the bad guys, the IDGAF about being politically correct guys are the ones who did said "I want this, I don't want that, I'm sorry if I hurt you" (and meant it).
I get that we only date a few times and they don't "own" me anything but if you present yourself as polite and considerate then you should do the polite and considerate thing.
Then my friends wonder why I have more respect for the IDGAF guys, at least they were honest...
And yes, I'm aware that I said "polite and considerate" way too many times, I was just making a point.