DENIAL!

DENIAL!

How do you talk to someone who is actively in an astonishing state of Denial?


I'm not asking for advice.

I'm curious how other people handle the situation-- usually when someone

vacillates between (what appears to be) total awareness of the situation

and total delusion... making excuses for the other party (husband, wife or lover)

for behavior which has no legitimate excuse.


Then tell us your Moon and Merc to make it a little more interesting.


As the Leebs might say... it's all in the delivery.

What if you thought they may be in danger themselves... would that change your answer?

Posted by Montgomery
How do you talk to someone who is actively in an astonishing state of Denial?


I'm not asking for advice.

I'm curious how other people handle the situation-- usually when someone

vacillates between (what appears to be) total awareness of the situation

and total delusion... making excuses for the other party (husband, wife or lover)

for behavior which has no legitimate excuse.


Then tell us your Moon and Merc to make it a little more interesting.


As the Leebs might say... it's all in the delivery.

What if you thought they may be in danger themselves... would that change your answer?

I don't.

Cancer Moon 12th house
Virgo Merc 2nd house

Shame them and then leave before you drive yourself crazy talking to a brick wall.

Are we talking about an instance where denial is this person's reality now?

If so, I am letting him/her live in that reality and bracing myself for the outcome.

I will express concern, no advice. Will back up with support.

Beyond that, their fate is theirs and I will deal with it.

Aries/Virgo

Denial about additction? if so that can make it difficult as usually the one in denial isn't even aware they have any problems. The addiction has that much control.. But I would share my experinces with them of what i went through and hope they can learn something from it.


Sag moon 1st
Cap merc 2nd

Posted by retrogradexy
Smack the person and then talk it out like a sergeant.

It works for special cases.

Seriously.
Tough love works for some bc the person have that same level of passion.

Interesting answer-- it isn't for everyone, but I can appreciate your angle.

In some instances, I agree.

Posted by justagirl
Denial about additction? if so that can make it difficult as usually the one in denial isn't even aware they have any problems. The addiction has that much control.. But I would share my experinces with them of what i went through and hope they can learn something from it.


Sag moon 1st
Cap merc 2nd

Not their own, no.

I hear you, though... 🙂

Posted by Damnata
Are we talking about an instance where denial is this person's reality now?

If so, I am letting him/her live in that reality and bracing myself for the outcome.

I will express concern, no advice. Will back up with support.

Beyond that, their fate is theirs and I will deal with it.

Aries/Virgo

You're a good friend... wow.

I'm Cap moon/Virgo merc, and all the responses from other Virgo mercs match what I would do/have done. Except that I won't shed a tear of guilt if they never get out of their denial. I'll be sad for them, but that's as far as it goes.

Posted by Montgomery
How do you talk to someone who is actively in an astonishing state of Denial?


I'm not asking for advice.

I'm curious how other people handle the situation-- usually when someone

vacillates between (what appears to be) total awareness of the situation

and total delusion... making excuses for the other party (husband, wife or lover)

for behavior which has no legitimate excuse.


Then tell us your Moon and Merc to make it a little more interesting.


As the Leebs might say... it's all in the delivery.

What if you thought they may be in danger themselves... would that change your answer?

Fun isn't it? lol... in the real world, I will put all the facts and logic on the table, give case scenario's as an example, and when they still regurgitate the excuses/justifications, I drop it and let them know I'm there if I'm needed. THAT'S IT. Everyone has to walk the walk of their own choices when they are so determined to do so. Be there for the fall if that should happen.

Pisces Moon
Scorp Mercury

Regarding if danger was a factor...same thing, give them the worse case scenario's and let them do with it what they will.

A good slap on the back of the head does wonders

Thanks, LiB... I appreciate that-- it's really all we can do,

I guess.

Though I do get torn sometimes, wondering if they're

willfully blind or just so immersed in the situation that

they can't see how bad it is.

Or both.... lol


Anyway, thanks.

🙂

How do you respond to sarcasm, Rambunctious?

Does it shame you into doing the right thing?


😕

I disassociate from individuals like that.

They're toxic and emotional vampires.

Posted by Montgomery
How do you talk to someone who is actively in an astonishing state of Denial?


I'm not asking for advice.

I'm curious how other people handle the situation-- usually when someone

vacillates between (what appears to be) total awareness of the situation

and total delusion... making excuses for the other party (husband, wife or lover)

for behavior which has no legitimate excuse.


Then tell us your Moon and Merc to make it a little more interesting.


As the Leebs might say... it's all in the delivery.

What if you thought they may be in danger themselves... would that change your answer?

Speak up and if they are still in denial, then leave them to their own devices.

Cap moon/mercury.

Posted by rockyroadicecream
I disassociate from individuals like that.

They're toxic and emotional vampires.

They can be, you're right.

Posted by Montgomery

Posted by rockyroadicecream
I disassociate from individuals like that.

They're toxic and emotional vampires.

They can be, you're right.

click to expand

I've had to deal with individuals like that. I said my piece... on several occasions and they proceeded to continue with delusion. After that, I stopped entertaining their drama whore asses and left them to their own problems. There is no helping people like that. Not without professional intervention and life biting them in the ass.

I don't understand why people keep individuals like this in their lives. They're really toxic and draining long term.

Posted by rockyroadicecream

Posted by Montgomery

Posted by rockyroadicecream
I disassociate from individuals like that.

They're toxic and emotional vampires.

They can be, you're right.

I've had to deal with individuals like that. I said my piece... on several occasions and they proceeded to continue with delusion. After that, I stopped entertaining their drama whore asses and left them to their own problems. There is no helping people like that. Not without professional intervention and life biting them in the ass.

I don't understand why people keep individuals like this in their lives. They're really toxic and draining long term.

click to expand

Rocky, I'm beginning to think that this *level* of delusion-- or as the

psych/medical community might say: co-dependency/mental illness--

is just as bad as any addiction... it's just to a person, instead of

a substance.

:/

Posted by Montgomery

Posted by rockyroadicecream

Posted by Montgomery

Posted by rockyroadicecream
I disassociate from individuals like that.

They're toxic and emotional vampires.

They can be, you're right.

I've had to deal with individuals like that. I said my piece... on several occasions and they proceeded to continue with delusion. After that, I stopped entertaining their drama whore asses and left them to their own problems. There is no helping people like that. Not without professional intervention and life biting them in the ass.

I don't understand why people keep individuals like this in their lives. They're really toxic and draining long term.

Rocky, I'm beginning to think that this *level* of delusion-- or as the

psych/medical community might say: co-dependency/mental illness--

is just as bad as any addiction... it's just to a person, instead of

a substance.

:/

click to expand

Pretty much.