The past is the past...

But it can also be important. If someone is reluctant to talk about their ex wife or doesn't ever broach the subject, yet you feel it has clues to why they act the way they act or do the things they do..how/what is the best way to bring it up?

+1000 dj

You don't bring it up. Being concerned can come across motherly and sends out this controlling type energy as if you're trying to change him and fix his energy, men really don't care too much for that.

Is this the same guy dealing with his ex and kids? Why are you so caught over how he deals with his ex? Don't be pushy, let him brood, be angry or whatever it is he's being and eventually he may open up to you but you.

This is for life or at least until the kids are 21 thus find something else to do other than notice how he's acting and analyze it, instead get your own therapist to help you stay out of it if you need to.

When he's brooding go do something that makes you feel alive and happy away from him, your good energy can be very infectious so let him feel what he's feeling and he'll most likely snap out of it at some point.

I agree with the majority, in that to attempt to get out of him some clues, will likely make him feel like you are prodding him, eventhough, it would be for good intentions.

I am curious why you have the need to know .... are you thinking he is being false with you? Is there something to be concerned about?

Perhaps, the best way to get him to talk is by being open-mouthed yourself .. lead him by example and maybe he will be more forthcoming.

Wait ..... where's Mr. Gemini?

This was for a friend that is in need of the advice which I felt I couldn't comment on..

Thanks for the comments, will pass on.

And as tiz says, it clearly is a gender thing. I'm quite happy to discuss me ex's with a new partner and my downfall. With me when spoken out loud it helps me to process and learn from the experience and failure.

But then again failure is perceived differently by everyone.