We All End Up Alone...

I mean shit we really do. I'm always going back and forth between whether or not I should live selfishly or for other people.

And I'm not saying it has to be either or. Obliviously a balance. But than stuff will happen to me and I'll realize you can't rely on anyone. Boyfriend, mother, father, friends, co workers,

landlord you know these are just people. And we can all only be so much to each other.

I mean whether you get married, have children, have best friends, grow old together. You still fucking die and than your dead and you die alone and even if someone is holding your hand

where ever your going ( if you believe in after life or just plain death ) your going alone.

Really everything is about yourself and being alone. It just really depresses me. Maybe I have a fucked - up view and fair tale image of attachment in my head. Where I like to think you

can be with someone forever and love them as everyday passes. And if even if thats true with love in the physical body it isn't.

Or maybe I just hate myself and can't stand the thought I have to make everything about myself or that we all do.

I don't know.

Anyway end rant.

Posted by tiziani
Erich Fromm says pretty much what you just said in 146 pages, but in a way that makes you see it in a positive light. That we're born alone and die alone, might as well make an adventure of what is in between. It's the Art of Loving book. I mention it pretty much every 1 out of 10 posts on here because it helped me to get things in perspective and not just drive a car through someone's window.

Nice. I know I'm sure it the sense it is a beautiful thing. I mean it is but when looking at the dark side how sadly isolating 😢 but of course it just simply IS.

Posted by cheekyfaerie
That sounds a lot like your Aqua talking. 🙂

You're right. You can be surrounded by people on your deathbed, but you still die alone.

That's why you hafta make your peace with you first.

It's great to care about and want to help other people. It's a fucked up world out there and you'd be a cold person not to realize that. At the same time, we all have our limitations to what we can do. That goes back to finding the balance and the peace with you.

If you don't have that, you'll never be truly prepared to be with or help someone else.

I could be wrong, but that's how I see it.

Yea sometimes I think I have that fear of being alone.

Posted by tiziani

Posted by Sag89

Posted by tiziani
Erich Fromm says pretty much what you just said in 146 pages, but in a way that makes you see it in a positive light. That we're born alone and die alone, might as well make an adventure of what is in between. It's the Art of Loving book. I mention it pretty much every 1 out of 10 posts on here because it helped me to get things in perspective and not just drive a car through someone's window.

Nice. I know I'm sure it the sense it is a beautiful thing. I mean it is but when looking at the dark side how sadly isolating 😢 but of course it just simply IS.

Yeah I think we all been there, and will be back. Some days it's an uplifting thought. Some days it's depressing. No one has all good days.

click to expand

true

Posted by tiziani

Posted by cheekyfaerie
That sounds a lot like your Aqua talking. 🙂

You're right. You can be surrounded by people on your deathbed, but you still die alone.

That's why you hafta make your peace with you first.

It's great to care about and want to help other people. It's a fucked up world out there and you'd be a cold person not to realize that. At the same time, we all have our limitations to what we can do. That goes back to finding the balance and the peace with you.

If you don't have that, you'll never be truly prepared to be with or help someone else.

I could be wrong, but that's how I see it.

+1 Absolutely. If you're not at peace with the thought of dying you'll never truly live.

click to expand

I'm not sure if any human can TOTALLY be at peace with that. Just on the mere fact life is all we know. We do not know death. But I get what your saying.

Posted by tiziani
True, I'm not trying to look myself in the mirror and pretend to myself that I know what the actual experience of death feels like. I'm sure it'd scare the hell out of me.

But I think my own personal litmus test everyday is whether I can go to sleep believing that if my time was up, would I be happy that people I left behind could say "well he did everything he could". That's peace for me everyday. And if I go to sleep not feeling like that, then I know there's work to be done to get back to that place where I'm happy with the thought of being alone.

That's me. I'm sure it's not the same for everyone.

Right

Posted by cheekyfaerie

Posted by everevolvingepithet
How can you be born alone if you come out of your Mum's fanny?

Well if ya wanna get technical...

(😛)

Coming out of your mum's fanny is a solo affair. It only turns into a group venture when you fail miserably and they hafta cut you or pull you out.

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or u have a twin lol

Sag89,

All that you are pondering, I have. But, as a young child... 'tis the curse and the blessing of a Capricorn Ascendant. It made me live and love like a rockstar. As an Aries, I know how important self is.

Once you work through it and while you are working through it, you will eventually find yourself extremely conscious. It's a good thing to ponder death; it makes you live.

I would tell depressed friends: I'm sure a dead man would be more than happy to live just a few hours of your worst day.

I ponder death often. Me and my partner were pondering our deaths just this weekend - how we want to die and who might die first. We may not even be together for the rest of our lives but, we know we desire to die together. Even if we are not together, after all these years, please believe that I know and he knows that we will be devastated. It was my worst thought when we were divorced.

I loved the series "Six Feet Under" because of this topic. When I ponder death I listen to the songs that played during the season finale. I give, I love, freely unconditionally everyone, because that make me feel alive. It's life, you gotta live this shit.. all the way... all day... be strong!

And here is another of my favorite to ponder death to: Silversun Pickups, "Growing Old is Getting Old"