What would you do?

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cliche23
@cliche23
19 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 18 · Topics: 8
You're in a relationship with someone right? And you know deep down inside that you have done some things that your mate is aware of that makes him or her start to feel insecure again and not able to trust anything it is you say or do. What do you do? What are the ways of reassuring a cancer? I am asking this question on behalf of my boyfriend who is a cancer and so am I. He has done some things in which he has owned up to that it now has me wondering and feeling insecure again, and feeling I cannot trust him. I must say it took me sometime to let my guards down with him, same with him except I let mine down a bit earlier than him. He knows what he does or has done is wrong but now he feels that no matter what he says I will not believe him, which is true only because he's caused me to feel this way and it's going to take me some time to be able to trust him again and gain my security back into this relationship.

In your opinion what can he do? I honestly love and care for him; I am willing to work pass all of the things that he has done, however I feel that he has to do something to gain my trust back and make me feel secure again where I can believe what he says with confidence. So what is that he can do? Help me out on this please!
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bittertaurus
@bittertaurus
19 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 262 · Topics: 7
"He has done some things in which he has owned up to that it now has me wondering and feeling insecure again, and feeling I cannot trust him. "

Hate to tell u this but if u are insecure now, whats gonna happen later. You have got ur whole life ahead of u. A relation in which u feel insecure at the start is on very shaky foundation.

" He knows what he does or has done is wrong but now he feels that no matter what he says I will not believe him, which is true only because he's caused me to feel this way"

He is feeling dejected that even if he tries his best, you're gonna be disappointed. Its quite scary then cause now u need to reassure him that u trust him but he should be aware that u are a strong person but wont tolerate any nonsense that makes u insecure.

But do tell us what made u insecure abt him in the first place...
Profile picture of cliche23
cliche23
@cliche23
19 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 18 · Topics: 8
There were situations where he would lie to me about things that would have to do with his ex etc. So many things that could have been avoided; And there were times where I would allow him to use my phone just so I can have access to him (he doesn't have a cell) as far as talking and so on. We went away this past weekend and a woman called my phone for him, in which I asked him who she was and he said it was a friend (their conversation was very vague and limited), in which he did not tell her that it was his girlfriends phone or that he even had one. I asked him to call her back in which he didn't so I spoke with her myself while in his presence and she told me that he never said he had a girlfriend, and they've known eachother for two months, haven't done anything physically yet but they kissed.

So he tells me there are girls that he uses for certain things, this one in particular he was using so he can get a deal with his car. So that made me feel extremely uncomfortbale and I looked at my invoice for my phone and saw he called her a lot. What made me soften up is when I saw him crying, he had never expressed any kind of feelings he always acted as if he was hard, and he started to express all of these emotions to me. I told him that I would stick by his side,however I am going to feel uncomfortable and I feel that at this point I cannot trust him because he's always lying and this was not the only situation there has been others. Why am I with him? I don't want to give up on our relationship, every relationship has trials and tribulations in which I am trying to work through right now. So I feel insecure, just afraid that someone may possibly come along and perhaps he will leave. I have opened myself up to him completely and right now I am just in fear.