Have some of my fellow Sags

Ever been told they are smothering? When another asks for space. What techniques do you use to divert your mind and be more at ease?

I think of something else that is just as hard to deal and try to become focused on that

I am not going to be popular for saying this but, um, stay busy, busy, busy...amd always have someone on the back burner.

Ive never been called smothering before. 1st time! Its rather disturbing to me.
I can be agressive, pushy, overbearing, a pain in the arse, but only when i seek answers from others statements. Then i am the arse for being all of thee above and now smothering!
I know about space, but i say why & for how long. *geez

Well, its also possible you will find someone else while he gets his "space". lol

No I've never been told that. But I'm very conscious of it. That's why I take care of my daughter, work, work out, cook, listen to music, create music, text people, play Words With Friends...then yay it's time to go to bed! Lol. I just keep myself moving.

yes, i've been told that....

i'll let you know when i figure it out...

i am really impatient if i want answers or want to talk to someone...so this is definitely something i need to work on.

I think our often enthusiastic nature may be taken as smothering. I've never been told that, but sometimes I have asked myself if I am being too smothering (or pushy or clingy) and that's generally when I back off and freak out and write off the whole thing as an experience to learn from and get ready for the next experience.

Or just throw yourself into a new hobby!

Posted by TheLadySagittarius
Well, its also possible you will find someone else while he gets his "space". lol

The universe does work in mysterious ways 🙂

Posted by Mebs
No I've never been told that. But I'm very conscious of it. That's why I take care of my daughter, work, work out, cook, listen to music, create music, text people, play Words With Friends...then yay it's time to go to bed! Lol. I just keep myself moving.

I do all of that too, but sometimes my head "thinks" too much (mostly negative) and I feel like I need to say something NOW, instead of sit back, think of what I am trying to say, and how to say it clearly and then do it.
I usually put my foot in my mouth ALOT!
I have been getting better but when a stresser comes back, it triggers old behaviors and I revert back. Lots of tug/pull for me.

Posted by littlearcher
yes, i've been told that....

i'll let you know when i figure it out...

i am really impatient if i want answers or want to talk to someone...so this is definitely something i need to work on.

Same here! Patience is one of the lessons I struggle with. 😢

Posted by NikkiMse1978

Posted by Mebs
No I've never been told that. But I'm very conscious of it. That's why I take care of my daughter, work, work out, cook, listen to music, create music, text people, play Words With Friends...then yay it's time to go to bed! Lol. I just keep myself moving.

I do all of that too, but sometimes my head "thinks" too much (mostly negative) and I feel like I need to say something NOW, instead of sit back, think of what I am trying to say, and how to say it clearly and then do it.
I usually put my foot in my mouth ALOT!
I have been getting better but when a stresser comes back, it triggers old behaviors and I revert back. Lots of tug/pull for me.

click to expand

Oh wait. If we're talking about THAT, then I guess I smother. I can't do the silent powergames. If I have something to say, I'm gong to call or text and blurt that mess out. Then laugh and go watch Seinfeld lol. But I thought that was just called being hot-headed 😄

Posted by NikkiMse1978

Posted by littlearcher
yes, i've been told that....

i'll let you know when i figure it out...

i am really impatient if i want answers or want to talk to someone...so this is definitely something i need to work on.

Same here! Patience is one of the lessons I struggle with. 😢

click to expand

Dang! I do this too! So am I a "smotherer"? 😢

I've never been told I'm smothering, but when I feel like I'm getting needy I try to regain my focus and detach, cus it's those dang emotions that make you paranoid, which in turn makes you smother someone.

I also have a good 6th sense that tells me how close people want me to be. Whether I choose to listen to it or not is another thing. Sometimes my anxiety gets the better of me.

Posted by NikkiMse1978

Posted by Mebs
No I've never been told that. But I'm very conscious of it. That's why I take care of my daughter, work, work out, cook, listen to music, create music, text people, play Words With Friends...then yay it's time to go to bed! Lol. I just keep myself moving.

I do all of that too, but sometimes my head "thinks" too much (mostly negative) and I feel like I need to say something NOW, instead of sit back, think of what I am trying to say, and how to say it clearly and then do it.
I usually put my foot in my mouth ALOT!
I have been getting better but when a stresser comes back, it triggers old behaviors and I revert back. Lots of tug/pull for me.

click to expand

I hear ya on that. I have a tendency to want the answers right away cus I dwell too much on the matter and it makes me anxious and worried, which is bad cus my scorpio is the type to only discuss stuff when he's had time to think it over...which could take a week >.

Posted by Mebs

Posted by NikkiMse1978

Posted by Mebs
No I've never been told that. But I'm very conscious of it. That's why I take care of my daughter, work, work out, cook, listen to music, create music, text people, play Words With Friends...then yay it's time to go to bed! Lol. I just keep myself moving.

I do all of that too, but sometimes my head "thinks" too much (mostly negative) and I feel like I need to say something NOW, instead of sit back, think of what I am trying to say, and how to say it clearly and then do it.
I usually put my foot in my mouth ALOT!
I have been getting better but when a stresser comes back, it triggers old behaviors and I revert back. Lots of tug/pull for me.

Oh wait. If we're talking about THAT, then I guess I smother. I can't do the silent powergames. If I have something to say, I'm gong to call or text and blurt that mess out. Then laugh and go watch Seinfeld lol. But I thought that was just called being hot-headed 😄

click to expand

I can't do silent power games either. The more I try, the more I explode like a volcano! I need to get it out or it is even worse than when it first started. I am the type of girl and Sag that needs to talk about how I feel, as dumb as it may seem. If I talk about it right away, I feel better. Then I move on. Sometimes I need to talk to sort my feelings out. It is not a direct jab to you, but let me talk and I move on. I get over it faster, than if I have to wait. Make me wait and see what happens! IT is not a pretty sight. This just happened to me and the Libra I was dating. He is the one who told me I am smothering. He just didn't talk to me, he ignored me and avoided me and well.. you all know what happened!

Posted by happykitsune
I've never been told I'm smothering, but when I feel like I'm getting needy I try to regain my focus and detach, cus it's those dang emotions that make you paranoid, which in turn makes you smother someone.

I also have a good 6th sense that tells me how close people want me to be. Whether I choose to listen to it or not is another thing. Sometimes my anxiety gets the better of me.

My emotions always get the best of me. I say I am emotionally intense, bcus sometimes they can come out of nowhere! LOL.
I have a great 6th sense, but I seem to ignore it when I am stressed, panicked or when my anxiety kicks in. How did you go about developing yours?

Posted by happykitsune

Posted by NikkiMse1978

Posted by Mebs
No I've never been told that. But I'm very conscious of it. That's why I take care of my daughter, work, work out, cook, listen to music, create music, text people, play Words With Friends...then yay it's time to go to bed! Lol. I just keep myself moving.

I do all of that too, but sometimes my head "thinks" too much (mostly negative) and I feel like I need to say something NOW, instead of sit back, think of what I am trying to say, and how to say it clearly and then do it.
I usually put my foot in my mouth ALOT!
I have been getting better but when a stresser comes back, it triggers old behaviors and I revert back. Lots of tug/pull for me.

click to expand

I hear ya on that. I have a tendency to want the answers right away cus I dwell too much on the matter and it makes me anxious and worried, which is bad cus my scorpio is the type to only discuss stuff when he's had time to think it over...which could take a week >.

The Libra I was seeing asked for space and me, being who I am. Asked to talk. I "smothered" him to the point beyond repair (his words) but that is because my panick kicked in, my anxiety about the situation built up and WHAM. He told me it was over. To move on, and to never contact him again. He wishes me the best.
As if being called smothering wasn't enough, he tells me to take care and wishes me the best! That was the lowest blow in itself.
I only asked this ? bcus I wanted to see if other Sag's were like me and how you cope/deal with it....