What do you think of this?!

Hello,

Long time i havent been active on dxpnet, but as i am going through a very unusual situation in my life i decided to post my new story.

So I have been in a relationship for almost 7 months with a Sag. We met in the church and I had no interest or plans for going in a relationship with someone from my hometown as I was waiting for the Aries to come back and meet him. Met this Sag guy and went out, everything was great, I was shocked by how well we click with one another, he asked me to be his gf from date 1, i accepted as i thought it will work. We have many common friends and relatives and everyone told me that he is a great pick. Beginning was great, but after month 2, we started fighting over silly things, the weirdest part is that we fought most of the time when he was taking me back home from going out. I missed his presence and wanted to be with him 24/7, as it was very apparent that he did too. There was one serious fight where he slapped me... that has never ever happened to me, noone ever raised hand on me, but he did it... I broke up , but love towards him was bigger than my pride, so i got back to him after several days. He is a very busy man, is politician and famous business guy in our society, everyone knows him and his family. One day he got arrested...that was 5 months ago. They accused him for something he didnt do, (i wouldnt want to do into details), and he spent 4months in a jail outside our town, and we (I and his family) werent allowed to go and visit him, only his lawyer... I was absolutely truly faithful to him because first i knew i loved him, second i knew he loved me back even the times we were going out of control because of fighting, and third , i knew that the thing he was accused for was to be removed from his position, but because he did something. Everything was alright with me, even it was the toughest period in my life, up till now... Month 5 he was sentenced 3 years in prison as they set him up with evidence 'like he did what he was accused for'. I accepted that fact and supported him 100% , motivated him and was his shoulder to cry on and talk to. After these 5 months being separated, we decided we wanna be together, live together, and make family together... It is getting kind of serious, but we fight a lot... We fight constantly, every second day... I came to the point where I cant stand it any longer and I wanna break up just because of the fact I dont wanna fight anymore... He started showing some sort

of an anger which I can understand at some point of view (hes somewhere where he sholdnt be, for no reason)... It is getting terrible sometimes like the last weekend when he was allowed to go out from the prison... He broke up on me, said he no longer wants to be with me even he loves me... I firmly closed the door of his car and went home, i told my mother what happened and she got so dissapointed as she thought he was a great guy, which i still believe he is, but i dont know what the hack happened to him and whether this is his true and real side. That same night, he called, texted, saying he is sorry and he cant imagine his life without me, he loved me that much that is able to make any compromise to change and make me happy. We agreed under certain agreements that we will respect one another and talk to one another about anything and everything that bugs us... but that didnt last that long... today we fought again and he was again the one that broke up on me... he gave me that thought that he is not so serious and not so stable guy. My mom sees me in my eyes and she knows something isnt right between us... I told him we are done, and I am no longer going back to him as he doesnt respect me and doesnt see what Ive went through just to support him and be with him... we talked and talked and he cried and cried, apologizing and saying everything will be alright... and I no longer know what to do... I am in this deep shit that I feel like a lost sheep that cant make quick decisions... One thing i know is that if we definitely break up, i will have to go through a very tough time... I truly love him.

Huhh... what you think about this love relationship? Has anyone from here gone through period like mine, having ure man in prison and fighting?

Im going to appreciate your thoughts...
Thank you,
Libra, not 22, but 23 now... soon to be 24.

p.s he is 29

Um no I haven't had anyone that I know in jail. So I wouldn't e able to help you with that. Just so you know, I'm not judging you.
Okay so first things first. Why would he slap you? You seem to be okay with him slapping you, or that's what he would think if you went ahead and got back with him? Anytime you accept something like that, gives him the okay to so it again. No one deserves to be injured, hurt, whatever... that has nothing to dobwoth pride. You don't deserve it... Sometimes in our heads we like to make excuses for people, and especially libra does this thing where you don't accept the bad things, you don't acknowledge that there is something wrong bc you always want to see the best in people, not the ugly. He put his hands on you, and going back to him lets him know that it is okay to do it.
The next problem is that he started these little arguments with you. And then they got bigger. But he knows that if he hits you again- before you have an actual commitment, before you're married and has you for himself- it's game over for him. He's patient. But again, you don't see this, you refuse to believe that someone who "says" he loves you would do all this bad stuff. Just because all these people believe in him, in particular mutual friends and family, doesn't mean they know the layers underneath the surface. Abuse has to do with control. The abuser needs control over you, he needs to know that you will fall into his play, and when e doesn't get what he wa expecting, he lashes out. Sometimes it's an indirect thing, where he can't control his life or other people in it, and he chooses the "weakest" to release his anger.
Another thing is, someone goes to prison for that length of time with evidence that they did something wrong. You didn't go into details. And that's totally fine. But that goes with the entire "believing the best in people" thing you have going on.
You deserve someone who loves you. From the little bit you told me, I can almost guarantee that what he has for you isn't love, and if you continue to place yourself in the position for him to disrespect you and treat you like garbage- you'll end up in a bad place.

The SLAP should have been your wake-up call...It was time to move on...AFTER you SLAPPED his azz back!
You are waaaay to young to start in a relationship that will only lead to more abuse. Young lady, him going to jail is your blessing...don't block it

I wish I knew the answer also, but this is going crazier and crazier. We fight all the time ans every time we fight he says it is my fault. I think this is leading to an end...

... the last 2 times we made love, he couldnt make me feel good, i couldnt get turned on. I still love him, even the fact he is the way he is, but there are bugs in my head saying he is not the one... I just am afraid of braking up.

breaking up*

What do I think?

I think you are wasting your life with this guy.

i think your a troll.

The user who posted this message has hidden it.

pls dont hide it, it is alright anything you say, 🙂

Posted by Wynter
What do I think?

I think you are wasting your life with this guy.

Oh... you know, i have all kinds of thoughts in my head. My inner voice says that too. Thank you wynter, thank you.

hahaha soap on a rope

Posted by RainDancer88
And don't listen to your mother's advice. She obviously doesn't know how her daughter deserves to be treated. All women deserve to be treated like queens as long as they too, treat their man as their king. You are young. LET IT GO!

He is poison!

dont stress out... why so angry? I am alright... You make sense, yes. True, I am scared of being alone... we shared great times together, it is not so easy to let it go just like that, at least not for me. You may do it right away, but I need time, time to prepare myself for a new change and it will be challenging.

I guess I am going through a very hard period, but it will all get alright. I am not the kind of person that allows people to mess with me. I have my personality and character. There was a reason why he slapped me, i can say it was half my fault half his.

He is my first relationship where my boyfriend comes to my house and spends time with my family. This is all brand new to me... I had to go through all sorts of new experiences and it takes time now to get over them.

You know what irritates me the most? I give my 100% effort to please his wishes and make him feel like a king and in return I get nothing... Some say if you love him you wont be asking for anything, but fuck that, I want his attention, i want romantic things...

This will go on and on... Thanks for your opinion.

DMV or whatever nickname you have, please make me a favor, dont post on this thread until you have something smart to say. Please!

You have to be a troll. Thats the only way your story makes any bit of sense. This cant be real life. How do you love a man who raises his hand to you and is in n out of jail? This is ridiculous.

To Tizini,

Yep, still in the banking sector, performing excellent, thanks God. I will work this out, I am sure, I am just confused and I like to read different opinions about my current love life problem, 😉 Makes me think, you know, 🙂

RainDancer88, Thank you so much girl. I am aware of what I deserve and who am I and where I come from and all this, but the thing is, 'we all lose our mind when we fell in love'; so did I. I swear he is not a bad guy, from what I have heard, as a kid, he saw his mom being slapped by his dad... He said he is never ever going to do that on me again, but who knows, now hes saying that but its hard to believe once you do it...

People that know me and him say this is crisis and we should wait for some time and see where this goes. I am a weird creature, once you hurt me, I will always remember that and no matter what you do, it will always be somewhere in the back of my head, and will recall it. I doubt I will listen to the advice of staying with him.

The other day I sent him flowers at his house (he is allowed to go out every day from the jail until 5pm) and wished him a happy day and a lovely morning... I did it with my entire heart and love, and then he calls and says he is sad and feels stupid bc he should have done that for me. I dont see the logic, if you think you should do it then why sit and wait? Just do it... said it more than twice and made me feel like i shouldnt have sent those flowers.I really dont know how to help him since he is in a fucked up situation, and all i really wanna do is good, for both, me and him; but that seems not to work, apparently.

I am going to inform you where it all goes.

Posted by DMV
i think your a troll.

Lmao!

Today I broke up with my boyfriend.

My father bought him a gift (never happened before my dad buying a gift for my boyfriend) and sent it to me in order to give it to him. So, my mother fills one full bag with Swiss food for him and the gift and says "this is for your bf". He is allowed to go out till 5pm. It was 3pm when i messaged him saying if he wants he can come tomorrow now he can take his rest and eat and go to the jail, rather than spending 15 minute time with me... I was already in bed and wanted to take a nap. Once he said hes coming the other time he said hes not and whatever i said, who gives a damn, if he is coming he will call when he arrives. 15 minutes after the last text he comes in my bedroom, i was half asleep... he thought i was acting like asleep... he didnt even hug me, nor kissed, no anything similar to this... sat on the sofa and started bulshitting... I got so sick and tired of listening to the same stories and told him if he is not happy with me he can leave me because I am tired of making everything seem alright when it actually everything is fucked up as hell... He accused me for so many things, like is my fault we are going through this period in our relationship. Said i was doing nothing with my life and many more things that made me literally throw up. He went downstairs to say hi to my mom, mom asked if i gave him the bag for him and i said "he doesnt want it", and he said bye to my mom and my niece. I walked him to the door, and he was angry I could tell, and he said "think for your actions". I told him theres nothing to think about, I am done and wishing him a best of luck in the near future. He went... He didnt call, nor messaged... nor nothing.

To be honest, I feel numb... I feel empty... I feel everything but not loved and wanted by him.

I think this, no matter how bad or shitty period your going through, the loved one is always the loved one...right there beside you and talking and sharing all ure tough times you are going thorough and asking for help and support. He didnt do this... He doesnt even appreciate anything I have done for him.

I am sick and tired of this bullshit. I think this will make me close myself in cage. I feel stupid, very stupid...

Posted by libra22


My father bought him a gift (never happened before my dad buying a gift for my boyfriend) and sent it to me in order to give it to him.

What was it?