How to rebuild trust with a Scorpio man? (When he messed up)

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Axelle
@Axelle
5 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 47 · Topics: 2
Hi all, I'm back🙂

My first and also last topic was about a Scorpio guy who I felt betrayed by.

And I was right, he asked his friend to check up on me, and in the year we didn't talk he tried to find the courage many times to apologize to ask for forgiveness but thought why should he bother, because I didn't trust him anyway

And rightly so!!! He admitted he was a traitor, liar, cheater and should be hanged on a guillotine! Lol

We did have some conversations, but somehow he still feels I don't trust him

Maybe I'm doing something wrong?

What can I or cannot ask?

Help... I really want it to be like when we first met. Any tips? I really feel he's the one!



Profile picture of Axelle
Axelle
@Axelle
5 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 47 · Topics: 2
Posted by Arinoaqua

I don’t think you can. I went on a few dates with a Scorpio in High School and I thought he wasn’t that interested in me so I went on with my life. Anyway, years and years later we reconnected and he said I am the reason he is insecure with women...because I rejected him in High School.

We tried to date again in our 20s but he still didn’t trust me. He played games so I walked away again.


It's almost the same, accept that I didn't reject him

And he's not playing games now because he explained in his apology that it felt like it was going to prison and to appreciate everything that he has so I think I'm the problem?
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Axelle
@Axelle
5 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 47 · Topics: 2
Posted by DMV

Leave this alone.

How it starts is how it will end.

Foundation is dusty af

He probably can’t wrap his mind around why you are even giving him the space to talk to you. It’s probably mind boggling to him because he wouldn’t do the same if he were in your shoes. He probably thinks your desperate but why for him?


I'm not desperate, im fine on my own. I did try to date someone, he was really great but it wasn't him

We used to talk endlessly but life happened and here we are. I just want to be how we were before we separated our ways
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Axelle
@Axelle
5 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 47 · Topics: 2
Posted by Arinoaqua
Posted by Axelle
Posted by Arinoaqua

I don’t think you can. I went on a few dates with a Scorpio in High School and I thought he wasn’t that interested in me so I went on with my life. Anyway, years and years later we reconnected and he said I am the reason he is insecure with women...because I rejected him in High School.

We tried to date again in our 20s but he still didn’t trust me. He played games so I walked away again.

It's almost the same, accept that I didn't reject him

And he's not playing games now because he explained in his apology that it felt like it was going to prison and to appreciate everything that he has so I think I'm the problem?

How are you the problem? I don’t know the backstory but you referred to him as liar and cheater...and he never took the initiative to apologize. He only did so after you initiated contact.
click to expand


We were never together, but it was a joke from his side that he takes all responsibility for what happened. He mainly just pushed me away over the years, but it's way too much to go in details

I'm not sure why I'm the problem, takes two to tango

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Axelle
@Axelle
5 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 47 · Topics: 2
Posted by WarAngel

I think it's going to be tough either way. The only thing that's going to help is you taking your time with him. There's nothing you can say or do to make him do something any different.

Your intuition will guide you.


I feel there are still some unspoken words. We discussed a lot already during his apology, but I might have still some things I want to share

Do you think it's safe to bring it up out of nowhere ?
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DMV
@DMV
15 Years25,000+ PostsSagittarius

Comments: 294 · Posts: 28989 · Topics: 654
Posted by Arinoaqua
Posted by Axelle
Posted by Arinoaqua

I don’t think you can. I went on a few dates with a Scorpio in High School and I thought he wasn’t that interested in me so I went on with my life. Anyway, years and years later we reconnected and he said I am the reason he is insecure with women...because I rejected him in High School.

We tried to date again in our 20s but he still didn’t trust me. He played games so I walked away again.

It's almost the same, accept that I didn't reject him

And he's not playing games now because he explained in his apology that it felt like it was going to prison and to appreciate everything that he has so I think I'm the problem?

How are you the problem? I don’t know the backstory but you referred to him as liar and cheater...and he never took the initiative to apologize. He only did so after you initiated contact.
click to expand



Yes, he ego prevented him from apologizing because he isn’t truly invested.

Watch his unsolicited efforts towards you.

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Axelle
@Axelle
5 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 47 · Topics: 2
Posted by Arinoaqua
Posted by Axelle
Posted by Arinoaqua
Posted by Axelle
Posted by Arinoaqua

I don’t think you can. I went on a few dates with a Scorpio in High School and I thought he wasn’t that interested in me so I went on with my life. Anyway, years and years later we reconnected and he said I am the reason he is insecure with women...because I rejected him in High School.

We tried to date again in our 20s but he still didn’t trust me. He played games so I walked away again.

It's almost the same, accept that I didn't reject him

And he's not playing games now because he explained in his apology that it felt like it was going to prison and to appreciate everything that he has so I think I'm the problem?

How are you the problem? I don’t know the backstory but you referred to him as liar and cheater...and he never took the initiative to apologize. He only did so after you initiated contact.

We were never together, but it was a joke from his side that he takes all responsibility for what happened. He mainly just pushed me away over the years, but it's way too much to go in details

I'm not sure why I'm the problem, takes two to tango

It seems like you’re a lot more invested than he is honestly. He broke your trust, didn’t apologize until you reached out a year later, and now he’s making you feel guilty for not trusting you and leading you to believe you did something wrong.
click to expand



He reached out now, especially the last few months. But he said he has a sceptic mind

@DMV he's trying, but I did tell him I have trust issues because my ex cheated on me. (Who am I kidding, I don't trust anyone :p) So maybe I haven't been easy to deal with

He also said he has never felt glorious before, even though with great friends and childhood, so he's working on being the best of himself he can be

He does want me in his life as long as possible, but he has having a hard time financially atm that he can't give me want I deserve
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PhoenixRising
@PhoenixRising
13 Years10,000+ Posts

Comments: 19 · Posts: 19733 · Topics: 48
Posted by Axelle

Help... I really want it to be like when we first met. Any tips?...

Letting go of this notion would be a start.

Can't unring a bell and he knows this. If there are things still festering in your mind, ask, address it and if it has been addressed to your satisfaction move on from it. Truly move on. That is and the only point of addressing an issue anyway. Otherwise you're just trying to passively hold something over someone's head. If you can do that and he can see that you can do that, and he is honest about his intentions to be with you, then you can probably move forward. Not like it was when you first met. Better than, because you have been able to deal with and move through the problem(s) you had.

I find it curious that "he messed up" but you're the one worried about building trust again. The playing field is uneven. Just sayin'.
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Vacation Queen
@saggurl88
12 Years25,000+ Posts

Comments: 22238 · Posts: 25616 · Topics: 84
Posted by Axelle

Hi all, I'm back🙂

My first and also last topic was about a Scorpio guy who I felt betrayed by.

And I was right, he asked his friend to check up on me, and in the year we didn't talk he tried to find the courage many times to apologize to ask for forgiveness but thought why should he bother, because I didn't trust him anyway

And rightly so!!! He admitted he was a traitor, liar, cheater and should be hanged on a guillotine! Lol

We did have some conversations, but somehow he still feels I don't trust him

Maybe I'm doing something wrong?

What can I or cannot ask?

Help... I really want it to be like when we first met. Any tips? I really feel he's the one!


Why do you need to trust him?

"He admitted he was a traitor, liar, cheater and should be hanged on a guillotine"

You can ask him whatever you want, he's trying to get back into your good graces. Scorpios respect honesty and direct talking.

The question is how can it go back to what it was before, if he cheated and lied. Why are you willing to accept this behavior?

I can admit, if it was a long marriage, I can see why you would want it to work, for other reasons, but just a relationship?

Are you really willing to lower yourself into accepting whatever excuse he is gonna give for why this happened?
Profile picture of saggurl88
Vacation Queen
@saggurl88
12 Years25,000+ Posts

Comments: 22238 · Posts: 25616 · Topics: 84
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by Axelle

We were never together, but it was a joke from his side that he takes all responsibility for what happened. He mainly just pushed me away over the years, but it's way too much to go in details

I'm not sure why I'm the problem, takes two to tango

https://wavymag.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/07/giphy-2.gif<div class="bqfade">click to expand



😆 #SAME

Image Not Found
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Vacation Queen
@saggurl88
12 Years25,000+ Posts

Comments: 22238 · Posts: 25616 · Topics: 84
Posted by Axelle
Posted by Arinoaqua
Posted by Axelle
Posted by Arinoaqua

I don’t think you can. I went on a few dates with a Scorpio in High School and I thought he wasn’t that interested in me so I went on with my life. Anyway, years and years later we reconnected and he said I am the reason he is insecure with women...because I rejected him in High School.

We tried to date again in our 20s but he still didn’t trust me. He played games so I walked away again.

It's almost the same, accept that I didn't reject him

And he's not playing games now because he explained in his apology that it felt like it was going to prison and to appreciate everything that he has so I think I'm the problem?

How are you the problem? I don’t know the backstory but you referred to him as liar and cheater...and he never took the initiative to apologize. He only did so after you initiated contact.

We were never together, but it was a joke from his side that he takes all responsibility for what happened. He mainly just pushed me away over the years, but it's way too much to go in details

I'm not sure why I'm the problem, takes two to tango
click to expand



You're not the problem, he is, and he will think you're weak for accepting whatever he's throwing at you and will continue to treat you bad.

Him pushing you away for years?

Is the sex that good that you are confused by his behavior? Your love for him is blinding you, for real.

Image Not Found
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Axelle
@Axelle
5 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 47 · Topics: 2
Thank you for all the responses !

But guys, if you read other topic, we were never together.

We were lovers then parted due life, all amicable, until two years ago because he was fighting with everyone. Friends and family

I'm not weak, this is not about sex. I don't understand where all the assumptions come from, my question was about getting to the foundation we had when we first met

Earlier in thread I mentioned the cheating and lying was a joke (should have been more clear about this! That's why I added the 'lol' after ) which in other words just means he takes full responsibility what happened to get to this point of friendship/relationship (not actual relationship). He did not cheat or lie, he just basically made me question my own morals. I just wanted to get a quick answer about how to establish trust again, because he's really trying !

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Axelle
@Axelle
5 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 47 · Topics: 2
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by Axelle

Help... I really want it to be like when we first met. Any tips?...

Letting go of this notion would be a start.

Can't unring a bell and he knows this. If there are things still festering in your mind, ask, address it and if it has been addressed to your satisfaction move on from it. Truly move on. That is and the only point of addressing an issue anyway. Otherwise you're just trying to passively hold something over someone's head. If you can do that and he can see that you can do that, and he is honest about his intentions to be with you, then you can probably move forward. Not like it was when you first met. Better than, because you have been able to deal with and move through the problem(s) you had.

I find it curious that "he messed up" but you're the one worried about building trust again. The playing field is uneven. Just sayin'.
click to expand


.

I don't think I explained it very well, but that's ok, I didn't go into detail about the situation, it's just too much drama to go into detail

But you're definitely right, this was the answer I was looking for, I will wait it out like @Warangel said, and casually say I still have some unspoken words I'd like to share
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Axelle
@Axelle
5 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 47 · Topics: 2
Posted by saggurl88
Posted by Axelle

Hi all, I'm back🙂

My first and also last topic was about a Scorpio guy who I felt betrayed by.

And I was right, he asked his friend to check up on me, and in the year we didn't talk he tried to find the courage many times to apologize to ask for forgiveness but thought why should he bother, because I didn't trust him anyway

And rightly so!!! He admitted he was a traitor, liar, cheater and should be hanged on a guillotine! Lol

We did have some conversations, but somehow he still feels I don't trust him

Maybe I'm doing something wrong?

What can I or cannot ask?

Help... I really want it to be like when we first met. Any tips? I really feel he's the one!

Why do you need to trust him?

"He admitted he was a traitor, liar, cheater and should be hanged on a guillotine"

You can ask him whatever you want, he's trying to get back into your good graces. Scorpios respect honesty and direct talking.

The question is how can it go back to what it was before, if he cheated and lied. Why are you willing to accept this behavior?

I can admit, if it was a long marriage, I can see why you would want it to work, for other reasons, but just a relationship?

Are you really willing to lower yourself into accepting whatever excuse he is gonna give for why this happened?
click to expand


The lying and cheating was a jooooke. He said that to take full responsibility for where we at now, but I didn't explain it well in first post

This is more about establish trust as friends first

We had that when we first met, where we talked about everything and now he feels I don't give off the same energy. And I think its due the unspoken words I still have

Again, he didn't cheat, we were never really together. Its more about a family/friends business situation, but all drama was too much to tell so I left that out for efficiency purposes

Just wanted to get my point across to simple ask how get back to basics
Profile picture of saggurl88
Vacation Queen
@saggurl88
12 Years25,000+ Posts

Comments: 22238 · Posts: 25616 · Topics: 84
Posted by Axelle
Posted by saggurl88
Posted by Axelle

Hi all, I'm back🙂

My first and also last topic was about a Scorpio guy who I felt betrayed by.

And I was right, he asked his friend to check up on me, and in the year we didn't talk he tried to find the courage many times to apologize to ask for forgiveness but thought why should he bother, because I didn't trust him anyway

And rightly so!!! He admitted he was a traitor, liar, cheater and should be hanged on a guillotine! Lol

We did have some conversations, but somehow he still feels I don't trust him

Maybe I'm doing something wrong?

What can I or cannot ask?

Help... I really want it to be like when we first met. Any tips? I really feel he's the one!

Why do you need to trust him?

"He admitted he was a traitor, liar, cheater and should be hanged on a guillotine"

You can ask him whatever you want, he's trying to get back into your good graces. Scorpios respect honesty and direct talking.

The question is how can it go back to what it was before, if he cheated and lied. Why are you willing to accept this behavior?

I can admit, if it was a long marriage, I can see why you would want it to work, for other reasons, but just a relationship?

Are you really willing to lower yourself into accepting whatever excuse he is gonna give for why this happened?

The lying and cheating was a jooooke. He said that to take full responsibility for where we at now, but I didn't explain it well in first post

This is more about establish trust as friends first

We had that when we first met, where we talked about everything and now he feels I don't give off the same energy. And I think its due the unspoken words I still have

Again, he didn't cheat, we were never really together. Its more about a family/friends business situation, but all drama was too much to tell so I left that out for effiency purposes

Just wanted to get my point across to simple ask how get back to basics
click to expand



Oh wow lol That changes a lot as far as whatever responses you were hoping to get.

Trust is something that both of you should be building with each other. I didn't know Scorpios waited years to pursue someone, I thought they were quicker then that.

Guess you should be thinking about if what he has to offer, is something you will be able to live with and build from in a couple relationship.

Helping a man get on his feet is never a good thing, for a woman, in my opinion. Usually a women build them up and they leave her for someone else that doesn't know of their low points, when they are starting at a low level in finances. It's almost emasculating for the man, and can be a constant reminder of who got him in a better place financially. Some men don't handle this well.
Profile picture of Axelle
Axelle
@Axelle
5 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 47 · Topics: 2
In the past I felt I was the only one being in diplomatic position while he gets emotional and pushes me away. He grew out of it now

But I feel I need to share my unspoken words to move on to better version of us as friends first. When he apologized he said I could ask him anything and he would explain. We talked a lot, so much that I didn't get to ask all of what I wanted after few days of rethinking the conversation

I thought I would get passed it by not sharing/asking unspoken words, but months have gone by, he can feel my weird energy (even by text), so we talk less

But I can't just drop like: "hey remember that apology, let's rehash that 😑"
Profile picture of Axelle
Axelle
@Axelle
5 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 47 · Topics: 2
Posted by saggurl88
Posted by Axelle
Posted by saggurl88
Posted by Axelle

Hi all, I'm back🙂

My first and also last topic was about a Scorpio guy who I felt betrayed by.

And I was right, he asked his friend to check up on me, and in the year we didn't talk he tried to find the courage many times to apologize to ask for forgiveness but thought why should he bother, because I didn't trust him anyway

And rightly so!!! He admitted he was a traitor, liar, cheater and should be hanged on a guillotine! Lol

We did have some conversations, but somehow he still feels I don't trust him

Maybe I'm doing something wrong?

What can I or cannot ask?

Help... I really want it to be like when we first met. Any tips? I really feel he's the one!

Why do you need to trust him?

"He admitted he was a traitor, liar, cheater and should be hanged on a guillotine"

You can ask him whatever you want, he's trying to get back into your good graces. Scorpios respect honesty and direct talking.

The question is how can it go back to what it was before, if he cheated and lied. Why are you willing to accept this behavior?

I can admit, if it was a long marriage, I can see why you would want it to work, for other reasons, but just a relationship?

Are you really willing to lower yourself into accepting whatever excuse he is gonna give for why this happened?

The lying and cheating was a jooooke. He said that to take full responsibility for where we at now, but I didn't explain it well in first post

This is more about establish trust as friends first

We had that when we first met, where we talked about everything and now he feels I don't give off the same energy. And I think its due the unspoken words I still have

Again, he didn't cheat, we were never really together. Its more about a family/friends business situation, but all drama was too much to tell so I left that out for effiency purposes

Just wanted to get my point across to simple ask how get back to basics

Oh wow lol That changes a lot as far as whatever responses you were hoping to get.

Trust is something that both of you should be building with each other. I didn't know Scorpios waited years to pursue someone, I thought they were quicker then that.

Guess you should be thinking about if what he has to offer, is something you will be able to live with and build from in a couple relationship.

Helping a man get on his feet is never a good thing, for a woman, in my opinion. Usually a women build them up and they leave her for someone else that doesn't know of their low points, when they are starting at a low level in finances. It's almost emasculating for the man, and can be a constant reminder of who got him in a better place financially. Some men don't handle this well.
click to expand



Yeah sorry its just so many years have gone by and it would be a book to explain everything.

We were lovers (not a couple), and now friends, but before life took a turn we talked about how after uni it would be different because he sees that future, but stuff happened and he's not in the position he likes to be now

Life controls him, and not otherway around

He did say in the past he likes to do everything alone, so that can take years !!(this is probably bwhy I don't trust the situation)

I'm not sure what answers I was hoping to get because I explain very very badly hahha

But I truly think I'm taking a small part in this too, not only him

What would be your verdict? Wait it out? Or tell him something is bothering me or really trying to leave it for good? The latter is gonna be very hard

I'm fine with what he has to offer, but he's not fine with what he has to offer . Ego thing
Profile picture of Axelle
Axelle
@Axelle
5 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 47 · Topics: 2
Posted by Axelle

In the past I felt I was the only one being in diplomatic position while he gets emotional and pushes me away. He grew out of it now

But I feel I need to share my unspoken words to move on to better version of us as friends first. When he apologized he said I could ask him anything and he would explain. We talked a lot, so much that I didn't get to ask all of what I wanted after few days of rethinking the conversation

I thought I would get passed it by not sharing/asking unspoken words, but months have gone by, he can feel my weird energy (even by text), so we talk less

But I can't just drop like: "hey remember that apology, let's rehash that 😑"

@cake
Profile picture of saggurl88
Vacation Queen
@saggurl88
12 Years25,000+ Posts

Comments: 22238 · Posts: 25616 · Topics: 84
Posted by Axelle
Posted by saggurl88
Posted by Axelle
Posted by saggurl88
Posted by Axelle

Hi all, I'm back🙂

My first and also last topic was about a Scorpio guy who I felt betrayed by.

And I was right, he asked his friend to check up on me, and in the year we didn't talk he tried to find the courage many times to apologize to ask for forgiveness but thought why should he bother, because I didn't trust him anyway

And rightly so!!! He admitted he was a traitor, liar, cheater and should be hanged on a guillotine! Lol

We did have some conversations, but somehow he still feels I don't trust him

Maybe I'm doing something wrong?

What can I or cannot ask?

Help... I really want it to be like when we first met. Any tips? I really feel he's the one!

Why do you need to trust him?

"He admitted he was a traitor, liar, cheater and should be hanged on a guillotine"

You can ask him whatever you want, he's trying to get back into your good graces. Scorpios respect honesty and direct talking.

The question is how can it go back to what it was before, if he cheated and lied. Why are you willing to accept this behavior?

I can admit, if it was a long marriage, I can see why you would want it to work, for other reasons, but just a relationship?

Are you really willing to lower yourself into accepting whatever excuse he is gonna give for why this happened?

The lying and cheating was a jooooke. He said that to take full responsibility for where we at now, but I didn't explain it well in first post

This is more about establish trust as friends first

We had that when we first met, where we talked about everything and now he feels I don't give off the same energy. And I think its due the unspoken words I still have

Again, he didn't cheat, we were never really together. Its more about a family/friends business situation, but all drama was too much to tell so I left that out for effiency purposes

Just wanted to get my point across to simple ask how get back to basics

Oh wow lol That changes a lot as far as whatever responses you were hoping to get.

Trust is something that both of you should be building with each other. I didn't know Scorpios waited years to pursue someone, I thought they were quicker then that.

Guess you should be thinking about if what he has to offer, is something you will be able to live with and build from in a couple relationship.

Helping a man get on his feet is never a good thing, for a woman, in my opinion. Usually a women build them up and they leave her for someone else that doesn't know of their low points, when they are starting at a low level in finances. It's almost emasculating for the man, and can be a constant reminder of who got him in a better place financially. Some men don't handle this well.

Yeah sorry its just so many years have gone by and it would be a book to explain everything.

We were lovers (not a couple), and now friends, but before life took a turn we talked about how after uni it would be different because he sees that future, but stuff happened and he's not in the position he likes to be now

Life controls him, and not otherway around

He did say in the past he likes to do everything alone, so that can take years !!(this is probably bwhy I don't trust the situation)

I'm not sure what answers I was hoping to get because I explain very very badly hahha

But I truly think I'm taking a small part in this too, not only him

What would be your verdict? Wait it out? Or tell him something is bothering me or really trying to leave it for good? The latter is gonna be very hard

I'm fine with what he has to offer, but he's not fine with what he has to offer . Ego thing
click to expand



You should talk to him, it's hard to say without knowing all the details. He seems uninterested in a relationship. Anyone saying "it's not the right time" is a person saying that you aren't the right one for them.

If a person wanted to be in a relationship, they would be more worried about losing the person, but that is just my opinion.

Timing being off can be an excuse to back burner you.

Can you be direct and just ask?
Profile picture of Axelle
Axelle
@Axelle
5 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 47 · Topics: 2
Posted by saggurl88
Posted by Axelle
Posted by saggurl88
Posted by Axelle
Posted by saggurl88
Posted by Axelle

Hi all, I'm back🙂

My first and also last topic was about a Scorpio guy who I felt betrayed by.

And I was right, he asked his friend to check up on me, and in the year we didn't talk he tried to find the courage many times to apologize to ask for forgiveness but thought why should he bother, because I didn't trust him anyway

And rightly so!!! He admitted he was a traitor, liar, cheater and should be hanged on a guillotine! Lol

We did have some conversations, but somehow he still feels I don't trust him

Maybe I'm doing something wrong?

What can I or cannot ask?

Help... I really want it to be like when we first met. Any tips? I really feel he's the one!

Why do you need to trust him?

"He admitted he was a traitor, liar, cheater and should be hanged on a guillotine"

You can ask him whatever you want, he's trying to get back into your good graces. Scorpios respect honesty and direct talking.

The question is how can it go back to what it was before, if he cheated and lied. Why are you willing to accept this behavior?

I can admit, if it was a long marriage, I can see why you would want it to work, for other reasons, but just a relationship?

Are you really willing to lower yourself into accepting whatever excuse he is gonna give for why this happened?

The lying and cheating was a jooooke. He said that to take full responsibility for where we at now, but I didn't explain it well in first post

This is more about establish trust as friends first

We had that when we first met, where we talked about everything and now he feels I don't give off the same energy. And I think its due the unspoken words I still have

Again, he didn't cheat, we were never really together. Its more about a family/friends business situation, but all drama was too much to tell so I left that out for effiency purposes

Just wanted to get my point across to simple ask how get back to basics

Oh wow lol That changes a lot as far as whatever responses you were hoping to get.

Trust is something that both of you should be building with each other. I didn't know Scorpios waited years to pursue someone, I thought they were quicker then that.

Guess you should be thinking about if what he has to offer, is something you will be able to live with and build from in a couple relationship.

Helping a man get on his feet is never a good thing, for a woman, in my opinion. Usually a women build them up and they leave her for someone else that doesn't know of their low points, when they are starting at a low level in finances. It's almost emasculating for the man, and can be a constant reminder of who got him in a better place financially. Some men don't handle this well.

Yeah sorry its just so many years have gone by and it would be a book to explain everything.

We were lovers (not a couple), and now friends, but before life took a turn we talked about how after uni it would be different because he sees that future, but stuff happened and he's not in the position he likes to be now

Life controls him, and not otherway around

He did say in the past he likes to do everything alone, so that can take years !!(this is probably bwhy I don't trust the situation)

I'm not sure what answers I was hoping to get because I explain very very badly hahha

But I truly think I'm taking a small part in this too, not only him

What would be your verdict? Wait it out? Or tell him something is bothering me or really trying to leave it for good? The latter is gonna be very hard

I'm fine with what he has to offer, but he's not fine with what he has to offer . Ego thing

You should talk to him, it's hard to say without knowing all the details. He seems uninterested in a relationship. Anyone saying "it's not the right time" is a person saying that you aren't the right one for them.

If a person wanted to be in a relationship, they would be more worried about losing the person, but that is just my opinion.

Timing being off can be an excuse to back burner you.

Can you be direct and just ask?
click to expand


We do live in separate continents now, and it's not easy for him to just come here where I am due visa restrictions (even with an invitation)

He has asked me to come visit him many times, but I got stubborn and refused because I thought he would be here by now atleast working. Life happened and he missed many opportunities to come here

But I will be direct and see where he's at

Profile picture of saggurl88
Vacation Queen
@saggurl88
12 Years25,000+ Posts

Comments: 22238 · Posts: 25616 · Topics: 84
Posted by Axelle
Posted by saggurl88
Posted by Axelle
Posted by saggurl88
Posted by Axelle
Posted by saggurl88
Posted by Axelle

Hi all, I'm back🙂

My first and also last topic was about a Scorpio guy who I felt betrayed by.

And I was right, he asked his friend to check up on me, and in the year we didn't talk he tried to find the courage many times to apologize to ask for forgiveness but thought why should he bother, because I didn't trust him anyway

And rightly so!!! He admitted he was a traitor, liar, cheater and should be hanged on a guillotine! Lol

We did have some conversations, but somehow he still feels I don't trust him

Maybe I'm doing something wrong?

What can I or cannot ask?

Help... I really want it to be like when we first met. Any tips? I really feel he's the one!

Why do you need to trust him?

"He admitted he was a traitor, liar, cheater and should be hanged on a guillotine"

You can ask him whatever you want, he's trying to get back into your good graces. Scorpios respect honesty and direct talking.

The question is how can it go back to what it was before, if he cheated and lied. Why are you willing to accept this behavior?

I can admit, if it was a long marriage, I can see why you would want it to work, for other reasons, but just a relationship?

Are you really willing to lower yourself into accepting whatever excuse he is gonna give for why this happened?

The lying and cheating was a jooooke. He said that to take full responsibility for where we at now, but I didn't explain it well in first post

This is more about establish trust as friends first

We had that when we first met, where we talked about everything and now he feels I don't give off the same energy. And I think its due the unspoken words I still have

Again, he didn't cheat, we were never really together. Its more about a family/friends business situation, but all drama was too much to tell so I left that out for effiency purposes

Just wanted to get my point across to simple ask how get back to basics

Oh wow lol That changes a lot as far as whatever responses you were hoping to get.

Trust is something that both of you should be building with each other. I didn't know Scorpios waited years to pursue someone, I thought they were quicker then that.

Guess you should be thinking about if what he has to offer, is something you will be able to live with and build from in a couple relationship.

Helping a man get on his feet is never a good thing, for a woman, in my opinion. Usually a women build them up and they leave her for someone else that doesn't know of their low points, when they are starting at a low level in finances. It's almost emasculating for the man, and can be a constant reminder of who got him in a better place financially. Some men don't handle this well.

Yeah sorry its just so many years have gone by and it would be a book to explain everything.

We were lovers (not a couple), and now friends, but before life took a turn we talked about how after uni it would be different because he sees that future, but stuff happened and he's not in the position he likes to be now

Life controls him, and not otherway around

He did say in the past he likes to do everything alone, so that can take years !!(this is probably bwhy I don't trust the situation)

I'm not sure what answers I was hoping to get because I explain very very badly hahha

But I truly think I'm taking a small part in this too, not only him

What would be your verdict? Wait it out? Or tell him something is bothering me or really trying to leave it for good? The latter is gonna be very hard

I'm fine with what he has to offer, but he's not fine with what he has to offer . Ego thing

You should talk to him, it's hard to say without knowing all the details. He seems uninterested in a relationship. Anyone saying "it's not the right time" is a person saying that you aren't the right one for them.

If a person wanted to be in a relationship, they would be more worried about losing the person, but that is just my opinion.

Timing being off can be an excuse to back burner you.

Can you be direct and just ask?

We do live in separate continents now, and it's not easy for him to just come here where I am due visa restrictions (even with an invitation)

He has asked me to come visit him many times, but I got stubborn and refused because I thought he would be here by now atleast working. Life happened and he missed many opportunities to come here

But I will be direct and see where he's at
click to expand



LONG DISTANCE? Y'ALL KILL ME WITH THIS!!!

I don't get it at all. But good luck and I hope it works out for you. It would be way easier to move on with someone close to you, with no connected past.
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Vacation Queen
@saggurl88
12 Years25,000+ Posts

Comments: 22238 · Posts: 25616 · Topics: 84
Posted by PhoenixRising
Posted by saggurl88

LONG DISTANCE? Y'ALL KILL ME WITH THIS!!!

I don't get it at all. But good luck and I hope it works out for you. It would be way easier to move on with someone close to you, with no connected past.

LOL. You now see why the very few Scorps in this thread bailed after page 2.
click to expand



I was seriously wondering how it was taking years, that's not how a typical Scorpio acts. But it makes sense. I didn't know Scorpios wait around for a person though, either.

7 billion people in this world and a person want's the one on a different continent

Image Not Found
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Baby Dastardly
@Dastard2020
5 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 550 · Posts: 1122 · Topics: 51
Posted by Axelle

Hi all, I'm back🙂

My first and also last topic was about a Scorpio guy who I felt betrayed by.

And I was right, he asked his friend to check up on me, and in the year we didn't talk he tried to find the courage many times to apologize to ask for forgiveness but thought why should he bother, because I didn't trust him anyway

And rightly so!!! He admitted he was a traitor, liar, cheater and should be hanged on a guillotine! Lol

We did have some conversations, but somehow he still feels I don't trust him

Maybe I'm doing something wrong?

What can I or cannot ask?

Help... I really want it to be like when we first met. Any tips? I really feel he's the one!

Don't let your feelings, sense of attachment and popular beliefs about love and romance deceive you. Look at reality in the face, he is telling you who he is... believe him!

There is no "the one", there's many "ones" out there for you. Much better than him.
Profile picture of Chessmess
Chessmess
@Chessmess
6 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 69 · Posts: 641 · Topics: 14
Posted by Axelle

Hi all, I'm back🙂

My first and also last topic was about a Scorpio guy who I felt betrayed by.

And I was right, he asked his friend to check up on me, and in the year we didn't talk he tried to find the courage many times to apologize to ask for forgiveness but thought why should he bother, because I didn't trust him anyway

And rightly so!!! He admitted he was a traitor, liar, cheater and should be hanged on a guillotine! Lol

We did have some conversations, but somehow he still feels I don't trust him

Maybe I'm doing something wrong?

What can I or cannot ask?

Help... I really want it to be like when we first met. Any tips? I really feel he's the one!



Hanged on a guillotine? That doesn’t sound right. No one was hanged on the guillotine during the French Revolution. Their heads were chopped off.
Profile picture of colors
colors
@colors
8 Years

Comments: 35 · Posts: 254 · Topics: 8
Posted by Axelle
Posted by saggurl88
Posted by Axelle

Hi all, I'm back🙂

My first and also last topic was about a Scorpio guy who I felt betrayed by.

And I was right, he asked his friend to check up on me, and in the year we didn't talk he tried to find the courage many times to apologize to ask for forgiveness but thought why should he bother, because I didn't trust him anyway

And rightly so!!! He admitted he was a traitor, liar, cheater and should be hanged on a guillotine! Lol

We did have some conversations, but somehow he still feels I don't trust him

Maybe I'm doing something wrong?

What can I or cannot ask?

Help... I really want it to be like when we first met. Any tips? I really feel he's the one!

Why do you need to trust him?

"He admitted he was a traitor, liar, cheater and should be hanged on a guillotine"

You can ask him whatever you want, he's trying to get back into your good graces. Scorpios respect honesty and direct talking.

The question is how can it go back to what it was before, if he cheated and lied. Why are you willing to accept this behavior?

I can admit, if it was a long marriage, I can see why you would want it to work, for other reasons, but just a relationship?

Are you really willing to lower yourself into accepting whatever excuse he is gonna give for why this happened?

The lying and cheating was a jooooke. He said that to take full responsibility for where we at now, but I didn't explain it well in first post

This is more about establish trust as friends first

We had that when we first met, where we talked about everything and now he feels I don't give off the same energy. And I think its due the unspoken words I still have

Again, he didn't cheat, we were never really together. Its more about a family/friends business situation, but all drama was too much to tell so I left that out for efficiency purposes

Just wanted to get my point across to simple ask how get back to basics
click to expand


I think it is not possible to get back to basics as that phase has passed, like the initial new interest does not stay same, not that it cannot grow but intensity reduces over time and may get replaced by comfort, trust, consistency if things go well. But not sure it can go back to the same dynamic as before mainly due to not being new and also because of whatever awkwardness that happened in between. You can try to build something from here and see where it goes.
Profile picture of MeFirst_Always
MeFirst_Always
@MeFirst_Always
4 Years

Comments: 9 · Posts: 64 · Topics: 3
Key points that I understood:

Pushed you away

Then after finding some semblance of stability came back in contact

Apologized for his past mistakes

Waiting to be to be trusted/accepted

Long Distance relationship

What I got to say since I was in one:

I'm not going to answer it based on sun signs, because life plays a role before anything else. He was financially not sound - he could've kept you hanging but didn't, he let you go. He got it sorted and then when you reached out he took the lifeline. Even went the extra mile and apologized! Now is waiting it out to be trusted.

Initially when I read the OP I was agreeing with posts that made sense that were trying to warn you off of him. But now that you've given the perspective of LDR I'm reconsidering my stance.
Profile picture of Axelle
Axelle
@Axelle
5 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 47 · Topics: 2
Posted by Piscivore
Posted by Axelle
Posted by DMV

Leave this alone.

How it starts is how it will end.

Foundation is dusty af

He probably can’t wrap his mind around why you are even giving him the space to talk to you. It’s probably mind boggling to him because he wouldn’t do the same if he were in your shoes. He probably thinks your desperate but why for him?

I'm not desperate, im fine on my own. I did try to date someone, he was really great but it wasn't him

We used to talk endlessly but life happened and here we are. I just want to be how we were before we separated our ways

A lot of good advice already given but I'm just going to blurt it out: you are so fucking deluded.

If you do decide to go back to him, I hope he royally screws you over. It's brainwashed simpletons like you who need to learn harsh life lessons.

What, so relationships are like Word documents now? Just click Undo and everything is fine once more? Seriously?

~smh~
click to expand



Thanks

But you don't know the whole story, so please check out
Profile picture of Axelle
Axelle
@Axelle
5 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 47 · Topics: 2
Posted by MeFirst_Always

Key points that I understood:

Pushed you away

Then after finding some semblance of stability came back in contact

Apologized for his past mistakes

Waiting to be to be trusted/accepted

Long Distance relationship

What I got to say since I was in one:

I'm not going to answer it based on sun signs, because life plays a role before anything else. He was financially not sound - he could've kept you hanging but didn't, he let you go. He got it sorted and then when you reached out he took the lifeline. Even went the extra mile and apologized! Now is waiting it out to be trusted.

Initially when I read the OP I was agreeing with posts that made sense that were trying to warn you off of him. But now that you've given the perspective of LDR I'm reconsidering my stance.

Thank you for understanding

The reason he couldn't come was because the country he lives it's hard to get a visa for my country. That's why

I don't think people on this site understand the luxury living in a nation with easy access to a country

Even I invited him officially, he tried but couldn't come

I wasn't the only one he pushed away. Close friends and family too. He said to me a long time ago that he pushes away people who he loves the most. And he was mostly focussing on solutions, instead of trusting the process

He now needs some work experience to get accepted for a job where I live, because he still wants to come
Profile picture of Axelle
Axelle
@Axelle
5 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 47 · Topics: 2
Posted by blackphvse
Posted by Axelle
Posted by Arinoaqua
Posted by Axelle
Posted by Arinoaqua

I don’t think you can. I went on a few dates with a Scorpio in High School and I thought he wasn’t that interested in me so I went on with my life. Anyway, years and years later we reconnected and he said I am the reason he is insecure with women...because I rejected him in High School.

We tried to date again in our 20s but he still didn’t trust me. He played games so I walked away again.

It's almost the same, accept that I didn't reject him

And he's not playing games now because he explained in his apology that it felt like it was going to prison and to appreciate everything that he has so I think I'm the problem?

How are you the problem? I don’t know the backstory but you referred to him as liar and cheater...and he never took the initiative to apologize. He only did so after you initiated contact.

We were never together, but it was a joke from his side that he takes all responsibility for what happened. He mainly just pushed me away over the years, but it's way too much to go in details

I'm not sure why I'm the problem, takes two to tango

What?? I'm super confused. How did you feel betrayed if you weren't even together? And what is he asking for forgiveness for? The way you wrote the OP sounded like you were definitely together. And you just said you don't trust him, so what are you trying to do?? Why do you want anything with him if you can't trust him? That's just a recipe for disaster. You gonna get burned, don't say I didn't warn ya..
click to expand



No, he is a lover from a long time ago I met during a summer holiday abroad and we've been talking on off over the years. One disaster happened and he pushed everyone away incl his friends and family

The cheating etc was said in a jokingly manner that's why I added the guillotine joke...

I now understand why everyone reacts this way, but he didn't like really cheat or lie... I felt betrayed as a friend, because when that one disaster happened I talked to him in everyone's best interest. His friends, his family and him, but he couldn't see he was wrong and said that he never wanted to talk to me

So that's why he apologized.

Now he made amends by reaching out to me through his friends



We were never together, just for the two summers when I visited him and then I met someone in my country and we lost touch for a bit. He thought I didn't care, because I didn't come back to visit him because I met someone (and it was hard for him to visit me due to visa restrictions and him just being lazy)

He said he needs to change and move his ass, but it won't happen in blip he said

I know it's confusing and I sounded messy, but it's really not as bad as you're all thinking actually, just bad wordplay
Profile picture of ELIGAB
ICY LAFLARE
@ELIGAB
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 3432 · Posts: 2766 · Topics: 15
Posted by Axelle
Posted by blackphvse
Posted by Axelle
Posted by Arinoaqua
Posted by Axelle
Posted by Arinoaqua

I don’t think you can. I went on a few dates with a Scorpio in High School and I thought he wasn’t that interested in me so I went on with my life. Anyway, years and years later we reconnected and he said I am the reason he is insecure with women...because I rejected him in High School.

We tried to date again in our 20s but he still didn’t trust me. He played games so I walked away again.

It's almost the same, accept that I didn't reject him

And he's not playing games now because he explained in his apology that it felt like it was going to prison and to appreciate everything that he has so I think I'm the problem?

How are you the problem? I don’t know the backstory but you referred to him as liar and cheater...and he never took the initiative to apologize. He only did so after you initiated contact.

We were never together, but it was a joke from his side that he takes all responsibility for what happened. He mainly just pushed me away over the years, but it's way too much to go in details

I'm not sure why I'm the problem, takes two to tango

What?? I'm super confused. How did you feel betrayed if you weren't even together? And what is he asking for forgiveness for? The way you wrote the OP sounded like you were definitely together. And you just said you don't trust him, so what are you trying to do?? Why do you want anything with him if you can't trust him? That's just a recipe for disaster. You gonna get burned, don't say I didn't warn ya..

No, he is a lover from a long time ago I met during a summer holiday abroad and we've been talking on off over the years. One disaster happened and he pushed everyone away incl his friends and family

The cheating etc was said in a jokingly manner that's why I added the guillotine joke...

I now understand why everyone reacts this way, but he didn't like really cheat or lie... I felt betrayed as a friend, because when that one disaster happened I talked to him in everyone's best interest. His friends, his family and him, but he couldn't see he was wrong and said that he never wanted to talk to me

So that's why he apologized.

Now he made amends by reaching out to me through his friends



We were never together, just for the two summers when I visited him and then I met someone in my country and we lost touch for a bit. He thought I didn't care, because I didn't come back to visit him because I met someone (and it was hard for him to visit me due to visa restrictions and him just being lazy)

He said he needs to change and move his ass, but it won't happen in blip he said

I know it's confusing and I sounded messy, but it's really not as bad as you're all thinking actually, just bad wordplay
click to expand



What's your mercury and moon?
Profile picture of Axelle
Axelle
@Axelle
5 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 47 · Topics: 2
Posted by ELIGAB
Posted by Axelle
Posted by blackphvse
Posted by Axelle
Posted by Arinoaqua
Posted by Axelle
Posted by Arinoaqua

I don’t think you can. I went on a few dates with a Scorpio in High School and I thought he wasn’t that interested in me so I went on with my life. Anyway, years and years later we reconnected and he said I am the reason he is insecure with women...because I rejected him in High School.

We tried to date again in our 20s but he still didn’t trust me. He played games so I walked away again.

It's almost the same, accept that I didn't reject him

And he's not playing games now because he explained in his apology that it felt like it was going to prison and to appreciate everything that he has so I think I'm the problem?

How are you the problem? I don’t know the backstory but you referred to him as liar and cheater...and he never took the initiative to apologize. He only did so after you initiated contact.

We were never together, but it was a joke from his side that he takes all responsibility for what happened. He mainly just pushed me away over the years, but it's way too much to go in details

I'm not sure why I'm the problem, takes two to tango

What?? I'm super confused. How did you feel betrayed if you weren't even together? And what is he asking for forgiveness for? The way you wrote the OP sounded like you were definitely together. And you just said you don't trust him, so what are you trying to do?? Why do you want anything with him if you can't trust him? That's just a recipe for disaster. You gonna get burned, don't say I didn't warn ya..

No, he is a lover from a long time ago I met during a summer holiday abroad and we've been talking on off over the years. One disaster happened and he pushed everyone away incl his friends and family

The cheating etc was said in a jokingly manner that's why I added the guillotine joke...

I now understand why everyone reacts this way, but he didn't like really cheat or lie... I felt betrayed as a friend, because when that one disaster happened I talked to him in everyone's best interest. His friends, his family and him, but he couldn't see he was wrong and said that he never wanted to talk to me

So that's why he apologized.

Now he made amends by reaching out to me through his friends



We were never together, just for the two summers when I visited him and then I met someone in my country and we lost touch for a bit. He thought I didn't care, because I didn't come back to visit him because I met someone (and it was hard for him to visit me due to visa restrictions and him just being lazy)

He said he needs to change and move his ass, but it won't happen in blip he said

I know it's confusing and I sounded messy, but it's really not as bad as you're all thinking actually, just bad wordplay

What's your mercury and moon?
click to expand


Edit:

I thought I read moon and Venus

But Mercury is Cancer and Moon is Capricorn
Profile picture of Axelle
Axelle
@Axelle
5 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 47 · Topics: 2
For the people who have faith in me...

A more detailed description of what happened over the years

Summer 2012 Travelling abroad alone and met Scorp

Spring 2013

Summer 2013

We met for those times and it was amazing, like dreamy. In those times we did talk about being together after our studies but life happened

Okt 2013 I met someone else and told Scorp I can't talk to him anymore

Somewhere in 2015 relationship with then BF went real toxic bad so I thought about Scorp and reached out and we talked, about life and all things that matter, just as always. While I was trying to solve my relation with then BF. He knew and was trying to help me

August 2016 I broke up with my BF but Scorp was then seeing someone

We were still talking when he had a GF, but he didn't tell me that he had a girlfriend when we're talking

He said that it didn't matter, and it shouldn't change anything. He said that he is not gonna stop talking to me just because he has a girlfriend, even when his GF didn't like it at all! One time he said she hated me (she doesn't even know me but okay) he said it was a really bad relationship

If I had known this information I would have stopped reaching out and leave them at peace. After that I stopped talking to him

Nov 2018 he reached out again and we talked as usual, like time never happened

We made plans that I go see him again in summer 2019 because I was busy with work so I couldn't come sooner

BUT in spring 2019 he had a family issue, a big one, and he talked to me about it, I talked to him to do the right thing, but he didn't (he got mad)

He was finishing his master's and was having a really bad year... So he lashed out and pushed me away, with many stuff happening. His best friend died and had a really hard time coping

So seeing him in summer 2019 was off the table because he was stressed

Okt/Nov 2019 we talked about some things happening, friends family, and something I said made him not want to talk to me anymore and he regretted immediately but was too proud to apologize which he did last year

Now he finished school and got a job and is working on himself and we've been talking since then

Last week he said him and I should be back to normal as nothing really bad happened

I felt betrayed at the part when he said he never wanted to talk to me anymore, but in OP I said it in a jokingly matter



Profile picture of Axelle
Axelle
@Axelle
5 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 47 · Topics: 2
Posted by Chessmess
Posted by Axelle

Hi all, I'm back🙂

My first and also last topic was about a Scorpio guy who I felt betrayed by.

And I was right, he asked his friend to check up on me, and in the year we didn't talk he tried to find the courage many times to apologize to ask for forgiveness but thought why should he bother, because I didn't trust him anyway

And rightly so!!! He admitted he was a traitor, liar, cheater and should be hanged on a guillotine! Lol

We did have some conversations, but somehow he still feels I don't trust him

Maybe I'm doing something wrong?

What can I or cannot ask?

Help... I really want it to be like when we first met. Any tips? I really feel he's the one!

Hanged on a guillotine? That doesn’t sound right. No one was hanged on the guillotine during the French Revolution. Their heads were chopped off.
click to expand



Headed on a guillotine then 😛
Profile picture of Axelle
Axelle
@Axelle
5 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 47 · Topics: 2
Posted by blackphvse
Posted by Axelle
Posted by blackphvse
Posted by Axelle
Posted by Arinoaqua
Posted by Axelle
Posted by Arinoaqua

I don’t think you can. I went on a few dates with a Scorpio in High School and I thought he wasn’t that interested in me so I went on with my life. Anyway, years and years later we reconnected and he said I am the reason he is insecure with women...because I rejected him in High School.

We tried to date again in our 20s but he still didn’t trust me. He played games so I walked away again.

It's almost the same, accept that I didn't reject him

And he's not playing games now because he explained in his apology that it felt like it was going to prison and to appreciate everything that he has so I think I'm the problem?

How are you the problem? I don’t know the backstory but you referred to him as liar and cheater...and he never took the initiative to apologize. He only did so after you initiated contact.

We were never together, but it was a joke from his side that he takes all responsibility for what happened. He mainly just pushed me away over the years, but it's way too much to go in details

I'm not sure why I'm the problem, takes two to tango

What?? I'm super confused. How did you feel betrayed if you weren't even together? And what is he asking for forgiveness for? The way you wrote the OP sounded like you were definitely together. And you just said you don't trust him, so what are you trying to do?? Why do you want anything with him if you can't trust him? That's just a recipe for disaster. You gonna get burned, don't say I didn't warn ya..

No, he is a lover from a long time ago I met during a summer holiday abroad and we've been talking on off over the years. One disaster happened and he pushed everyone away incl his friends and family

The cheating etc was said in a jokingly manner that's why I added the guillotine joke...

I now understand why everyone reacts this way, but he didn't like really cheat or lie... I felt betrayed as a friend, because when that one disaster happened I talked to him in everyone's best interest. His friends, his family and him, but he couldn't see he was wrong and said that he never wanted to talk to me

So that's why he apologized.

Now he made amends by reaching out to me through his friends



We were never together, just for the two summers when I visited him and then I met someone in my country and we lost touch for a bit. He thought I didn't care, because I didn't come back to visit him because I met someone (and it was hard for him to visit me due to visa restrictions and him just being lazy)

He said he needs to change and move his ass, but it won't happen in blip he said

I know it's confusing and I sounded messy, but it's really not as bad as you're all thinking actually, just bad wordplay

Ohhh, okay. That makes a lot more sense now. Thanks for clearing that up.

May I ask why you don't trust him? If you know the reason why he pushed you away, and it wasn't only you, have you not forgiven him?

If you want to rebuild trust with a Scorpio you have to be transparent and speak from the heart. You should explain to him how you felt hurt and betrayed by what he did so that he understands how that effected you. An open heartfelt conversation could clear a lot up for both of you.
click to expand



I made a timeline about what happened over the years on last page of thread

I felt hurt and betrayed about an incident where he put me in a position that I kind of needed to take sides, and that he said he never wanted to talk to me anymore, even when I was always "there" for him

But also that when we're talking he didn't tell me had a GF, while I did tell him what was going on in my life (also explained in timeline)

It's mostly we talked about that he would come here and then he didn't because of several issues (money, life etc)

Yes he came back last year with his apology. And then we talked about it for hours and hes working on himself right now

I think my heart and trust will rest more if I see him here and not in his country, but that can take a while

He did ask me to come visit him (several times actually) and that I was too stubborn not to come, but understood why

Eventho he really wants to come, he said that he loves his family (he's a real family man and lovea his mom to bits) and may not like a periodic life. (Like a life outside his country)

Do you think I should go see him after covid?
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Axelle
@Axelle
5 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 47 · Topics: 2
Posted by Axelle
Posted by blackphvse
Posted by Axelle
Posted by blackphvse
Posted by Axelle
Posted by Arinoaqua
Posted by Axelle
Posted by Arinoaqua

I don’t think you can. I went on a few dates with a Scorpio in High School and I thought he wasn’t that interested in me so I went on with my life. Anyway, years and years later we reconnected and he said I am the reason he is insecure with women...because I rejected him in High School.

We tried to date again in our 20s but he still didn’t trust me. He played games so I walked away again.

It's almost the same, accept that I didn't reject him

And he's not playing games now because he explained in his apology that it felt like it was going to prison and to appreciate everything that he has so I think I'm the problem?

How are you the problem? I don’t know the backstory but you referred to him as liar and cheater...and he never took the initiative to apologize. He only did so after you initiated contact.

We were never together, but it was a joke from his side that he takes all responsibility for what happened. He mainly just pushed me away over the years, but it's way too much to go in details

I'm not sure why I'm the problem, takes two to tango

What?? I'm super confused. How did you feel betrayed if you weren't even together? And what is he asking for forgiveness for? The way you wrote the OP sounded like you were definitely together. And you just said you don't trust him, so what are you trying to do?? Why do you want anything with him if you can't trust him? That's just a recipe for disaster. You gonna get burned, don't say I didn't warn ya..

No, he is a lover from a long time ago I met during a summer holiday abroad and we've been talking on off over the years. One disaster happened and he pushed everyone away incl his friends and family

The cheating etc was said in a jokingly manner that's why I added the guillotine joke...

I now understand why everyone reacts this way, but he didn't like really cheat or lie... I felt betrayed as a friend, because when that one disaster happened I talked to him in everyone's best interest. His friends, his family and him, but he couldn't see he was wrong and said that he never wanted to talk to me

So that's why he apologized.

Now he made amends by reaching out to me through his friends



We were never together, just for the two summers when I visited him and then I met someone in my country and we lost touch for a bit. He thought I didn't care, because I didn't come back to visit him because I met someone (and it was hard for him to visit me due to visa restrictions and him just being lazy)

He said he needs to change and move his ass, but it won't happen in blip he said

I know it's confusing and I sounded messy, but it's really not as bad as you're all thinking actually, just bad wordplay

Ohhh, okay. That makes a lot more sense now. Thanks for clearing that up.

May I ask why you don't trust him? If you know the reason why he pushed you away, and it wasn't only you, have you not forgiven him?

If you want to rebuild trust with a Scorpio you have to be transparent and speak from the heart. You should explain to him how you felt hurt and betrayed by what he did so that he understands how that effected you. An open heartfelt conversation could clear a lot up for both of you.

I made a timeline about what happened over the years on last page of thread

I felt hurt and betrayed about an incident where he put me in a position that I kind of needed to take sides, and that he said he never wanted to talk to me anymore, even when I was always "there" for him

But also that when we're talking he didn't tell me had a GF, while I did tell him what was going on in my life (also explained in timeline)

It's mostly we talked about that he would come here and then he didn't because of several issues (money, life etc)

Yes he came back last year with his apology. And then we talked about it for hours and hes working on himself right now

I think my heart and trust will rest more if I see him here and not in his country, but that can take a while

He did ask me to come visit him (several times actually) and that I was too stubborn not to come, but understood why

Eventho he really wants to come, he said that he loves his family (he's a real family man and lovea his mom to bits) and may not like a periodic life. (Like a life outside his country)

We also talked for few hours on Valentine's day, but I'm not sure if it means anything

Years before we had partners we talked a bit different than this

I think life made him insecure, he said he never felt glorious, even when he has like an amazing family, group of friends, top of his class... . He had many opportunities/offers for job and PhD to be abroad but didn't take it. His excuse was laziness, but I wonder if that is really the case

Do you think I should go see him after covid?

Personally I think he should come to me if he gets finances in order, it's his turn now. But life goes by, we're getting older, circle is getting smaller... he finds less reasons to go abroad due being wanting to be with family, and his friends who studied abroad are now coming back home



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