I think I'll go / I think I'll stay

Here's suggestion, why don't you sublet where you live and take a leave of absent from work and go.

Study long you will study wrong

Just freaking go...

What is your heart really telling you.

If I go, I don't want to look back. I am all or nothing. OK, so the place I'm at right now, is: 1. My babe goes & sets himself up 2. I have a month or 2 to think & analyze a but & look for job out there (do it by email? or phone or both or?!!) 3. he flies back & we drive there together

this is what I imagined & what he kinda suggested, well except the thinking part! He says he's not losing me. 🙂 He does have very valid & actually wise reasons for going.

He said it's a like a computer, I want to press refresh, except for me.

I'm not even from this city where I live! I've lived here 5 years & it's ok, but I don't even feel I belong here, this is just so sudden!

Take the leap....That's all I can say that man loves you and he wants you to be with him. I am quite sure he thought about this, could that be the reason he was acting strange a few weeks back?

Shit how many man tell there women/lady to move with them? Not to many.

I know if one person asked me to come and live with him and make it work again, I will probably go because I know the love is still there.

@topazwoman

20 YearsCapricorn

TG, why do hesitate to take the leap. That man loves you and you love him..rrrright —
Then why the hesitation.

@missmorals

20 Years10,000+ Posts

I say go with whatever your gut feeling..

Hesitation because it's across the country & we've only been going out 5 months!!! It's been a emotional / stressful relationship so that doesn't confirm to be the stability I need. There has been reason for it though, so I can also see it as the fact that we are strong and have stood strong & growing though some tough times. I love him like crazy.

TG
"Hesitation because it's across the country & we've only been going out 5 months!!!"

Ok I did not know yall been dating for only 5 months...HELL NO.
I am not going to tell you what to do but, HELL NO

If it was me I would not do it...yall don't know each other that well, he should not be wanting you to do something like that...regardless of what his intentions are.

I think yall should try the distance thing first and see what happens.

I personally have a two year rule,

The first year I believe it is full of lies, half truths and possible deceit.
The second year the real person comes out they can no longer lie

Well, I would have to have more than one reason for going, like I said. My sis, work, location. We started something good though, we spent so much time together and there's a reason for that. There is physical attraction, of course, but it's not one of those - it's hot in bed so I'm inlove things. There is a huge deep connection between us, and through the hardships of his losses and mine, we communicate. We grow.

We mentioned a few weeks earlier he wants to move west, but he wanted me with him. I told him I needed much more time to see how we grow, and he understood and said yes, I'll wait. But for certain reasons, he has to move within the next few weeks for work reasons, and wants to stay for the same reasons I would want to be there.

He said he knows he can't twist my arm or make me do anything, and after 6 months (once again reasons for work) he could always move back and be with me, but he deep down wants to just live out there anyways.

That is a short time, but I have been in 3.5, 4, 2.5 year relationships that couldn't even match how we communicate, make each other happy, and love each other now. Maybe it's b/c we're both older now and realize what it takes to be with someone. BUT have we learnt what it takes to stay together? Or am I just a fool inlove?

TG
To be honest the decision is yours.

Hey Emgem!

Doing pretty good! 🙂 Thanks for the last post, well all of yours.

There's something about lying close against your lovers body and having them wake up and say "I had a nightmare, oh babe I don't wanna lose you!" ...he cuddles so close & so scared.

I don't feel tied to where I am at all, just scared of what happens with us. Love can be blind, so I think after he leaves it will give me a good time to really see clearly. Yet everyday I only see more reasons to be with him.

How are YOU doing?

@gravity

20 Years

The 2 year minimum for a ring is a good one.

annyway, youd be amazed what kinds of bonds you can form wit hsomeone in a relatively short time like 5 months. in that time span you can feel like this is the only person you want to be with forever and be willing to drop everything to go be with them. this is good, but you just need to be careful that you're not still in the beginning phases of a relationship where everything is breautiful and peachy and there are no problems at all.

Well, here in the city, he is usally gone all week and back in only for the weekends, so I am used to that. I like the space so we can miss each other, but he would still call me a few times a day just to talk, or tell me he missed me. I'd be walking on clouds with a smile on my face, yet I would have time to do the things I love that help me grow as an individual.

We love doing most things together and yet we have both very much kept ourselves from colliding into one personality. I think that is one reason we are so passionate for each other, we are different & yet the same.

2 years for a ring, good idea, but I also believe there is a maximum. Couples I know that married after 10 years of living together got divorced very soon after. Expectations changed I guess.

@missmorals

20 Years10,000+ Posts

Personally I wouldn't as I don't think 5 months is enough time to really know someone!..

Not to move ONLY for them, I would get my own place, go for a new job, new location, new experience, and to see where we go. He believes we have what it takes to make it. He wants future. I do too, but I need security. That only time can really tell, but if I think about him and miss him like I do now in 2 months, would I not be crazy not to try?