Question for scorp females.

Did you have sex in your first relationship? Were you sure that he was the right person?

Yes he was the right person..definitely..Don't regret it..and that pain (good pain) still lingers to this day...and will prolly do for the rest of my life..

"emotional consequences of having a sexual relationship" - Yes..especially if that first person is "the one"..Its painful (emotional pain)

Lol, I'd love to have sex but I'm just not ready for a lot of reasons. I too am waiting for the "right one" as well. It's kinda hard to have relations with someone you cannot connect with.

Don't rush it...wait for that special person...If there is such a thing nowadays..LOL..

::MM fights cynicism::

17. I actually don't have much of a list. 🙂 Just one person I consider to be the one but she's in a relationship with a Libra. I've been pursing her for like a year now but stopped after I found out she was in relationship.

i think that your first time is never what you expect it to be, don't have any high expectations because a lot of the times they don't end up that way, i can't speak for everyone, but that's usually what it seems like.

my first time was also with my first boyfriend, at the time it felt right...of course if i look back we weren't ready at all.. it was weird and uncomfortable but i don't regret it because it wasn't perfect and i didn't expect it to be, we were both a lot younger and we thought we were in "love" but all that is just part of growing up, imo.

I would make life so much easier if people stated whether they were male or female, save confusion..

17 tis a bit young love...Hang in there till 18..LOL

I = It

Whoz the right person ?...Will U ever find him ?

No such thing

"Yes he was the right person..definitely..Don't regret it..and that pain (good pain) still lingers to this day...and will prolly do for the rest of my life.."

"No such thing"

Change of heart ?

U wud justify anything ....LOL

I did. I was 16 and had been dating my ex for two years at the time. I don't think he was the right person. The whole experience was so terrible to where I was celibate for 4 years.

After reading this board.... Its nice to know that there are people out there still waiting for the "right person"........ Maybe I'll find her.....

G: "Change of heart ?

U wud justify anything ....LOL"

Not really...he was right at the time..doesn't mean he has to be right now..He will always be right in my heart..despite his shortfalls..

Right person in general - what constitutes right?

"Right person in general - what constitutes right?"

I think that was my original question.

To which I replied I don't think there is such a thing in general..But you decide to drag up past post entries to justify your arguments/comments..

'he was right at the time..doesn't mean he has to be right now"

So how "right" was that person ?...and "what" was right about him ?

Exactly the same thing that might've been right with your woman at the time!

I think I wasnt able to make myself clear-

OK not going into the specifics...What in general would U assume to be right for U ?

A set of traits maybe ?....an optimum combination ?...Of course we cant keep harems so thatz out of question.

"I think I wasnt able to make myself clear-" - Don't patronise

Its difficult to describe whats right for me..you just know..I am not great at expressing that kind of emotion into words..its a combination of character traits and feelings..

If U spot a right person and finally are able to start a relationship ...Wouldnt insecurity , jealousy start creeping in naturally ?...And then a dream would start to crumble ...

I think learning to live with the right person is one of the biggest and serious challenge one has to face...How ironical.

The challenge is finding the right person..A fine balance (Rohinton mistry sprang to mind) they can't just be spotted..it takes time..In my opinion, jealousy and insecurity are part and parcel of every relationship but with the right person, these feelings are experienced on a lesser scale..due to trust maybe.

Learning to live with the right person isn't the challenge..Some may see it as that..its a case of adapting your ways to meet in the middle..its done so much through life anyway..at work you adapt your ways to fit into the workplace, with family you have to adapt to a certain extent..etc etc..I don't think that in itself is the challenge..

Yeah possibly ....depends on how paranoid U r. I could predict it somehow..that when we start speaking of the right person, obviously one of the premises would be that with her/him one would already have factored in that element of "fine balance". But with the right person Ur expectations may unreasonably be heightened and the fear of failure/losing may be more acute. In general walk of life U just scrape through partially coz U normally dont place high stakes on the characters and the events involved.

"But with the right person Ur expectations may unreasonably be heightened and the fear of failure/losing may be more acute."

True. But unreasonable expectations placed on the right person lead to disappointments. I think insecurity and jealousy are experienced on a subconscious level with the right person becacuse we strive so much to meet their expectations...that fear of failure/losing is part of that..If that is the case, how can that person be the right one..

Some sort of existential dilemma ?

Well...We may be stepping into the domain of utopia if we stretch this concept of a "right person" to finding perfections. That way Ur assertion would sound more appropriate that no such entity exists.

And it may also prompt us to ask a question whether real contentment resides inside OR is there any exogenous combination of elements poosible which would lead to happiness/excitement while avoiding monotony completely. Maybe there are different formulae for different people and that itz temporal in nature too.

"prompt us to ask a question whether real contentment resides inside OR is there any exogenous combination of elements poosible which would lead to happiness/excitement while avoiding monotony completely."

Quote: True contentment depends not upon what we have; a tub was large enough for Diogenes, but a world was too little for Alexander.

"Some sort of existential dilemma ?" - LOL..Theres always a dilemma in my head..

"Theres always a dilemma in my head.."

LOL..I will be forced to link it to the thought which Hypnotic Eyes came out with this morning- A desire to be important and powerful.

What would force you to link that comment to that of Hypontic eyes?

R U ever satisfied ?.....there has to be an underlying cause.

Nope..NEVER..thats the biggest problem