Where to go from here w a Scorpio?

I've been hanging out with a Scorpio for a little more than a month and it's been great. He is a true gentleman, treats me very well and makes me feel adored. He's stayed over multiple times which we pretty much stay up all night talking and kind of fooling around, but we have yet to have sex. He consistently tries to see me and always asks about me to my friends when I am not out. I found out last night he was at a party with his ex, a friend of mine saw them, approached his ex and asked her if they were hanging out in which she responded with "we are trying to figure it out." It's been a few months since they have broken up and were in a 2 year relationship before that. I do know they left together but he was texting me during the day complimenting me and was blowing up my phone the day before asking me to come out...

The only other odd thing I've noticed is that he always sneaks me in/out when I stay at his places and I know he lives with her friends, but he explained it as it causing drama/it would hurt her feelings.

I'm not sure if him and his ex have different ideas of what is going on or if I am simply being played...

From a Scorpio point of view is it time to cut ties before I invest anymore emotion into the situation?

It doesn't sound like you guys are in a relationship or dating? Are you just friends hanging out or have either of you expressed interest or intentions to each other?

He told me last weekend that he wanted to make me his girlfriend and I told him we needed to date a little longer. We have definitely expressed our feelings to eachother, he even said he loved one time when we were together. He's also told me that he has never met someone like me and made it clear he finds me very interesting.

Yeah I definitely want to speak to him, but I want to in person.

And I've been super straightforward with him from the beginning, I had been talking to someone when I met him and told him immediately that I would have to think it over, obviously I chose to give him my time instead. I just thought we were on the same page honesty-wise...

I did make him aware last night that I found out about the situation, but I haven't heard from him at all since. I can tell he is still a little insecure about it but I let him know when I miss him, show interest, etc. even if that is the case I don't know if I am comfortable with him running back to his ex when he is feeling insecure, either way it seems wrong.

Considering they did leave together I do not think it is far fetched. That is totally understandable, I let it be known I wasn't dating anyone else, and he seemingly let me know his intentions by telling me he wanted me to be his girlfriend. I just figured if he was interested in someone as important as an ex he would let me know...but I do also understand not everyone is straightforward.

I would be careful not to put all my eggs in one basket with this guy. Dealings with his ex should have told him "call me when you figure out what you want and let go of past baggage." It is not ok for a guy to still see his ex and try to move on. If he wants a new relationship he has to let go his ex. Continue to date other people.

Yeah, I told him directly that I had cut communication with the guy and that I was exclusively talking to him.


And that's how I feel Octoberbaby, I feel dating an ex is different than if he were dating another girl he had recently met and was playing the field.

Haha but that's the world of dating for you!

Posted by Rabbit
So you are basing HIS intentions on what his EX told your friend?

Ayyyyyy....just LMAO....just LMAO.

Hahahaha exactally

Bitches be bitches

He seemed to be genuine, he's hung around my friend group quite a bit, and they are all shocked by it because of how he acted towards me. They are pretty honest, so I trust their opinions, a Couple of them I've talked to think his feelings towards me weren't fake but he's struggling to choose between the two.

The night before my friend saw them together he was even asking my sister where I was while he was out...he may be just super bold but I wouldn't be talking to anyone's family if I wasn't genuine in my emotions.

So who knows, still haven't heard from him since I contacted him the night of, so I'm probably just going to let it ride.

Posted by TaurusOne
He seemed to be genuine, he's hung around my friend group quite a bit, and they are all shocked by it because of how he acted towards me. They are pretty honest, so I trust their opinions, a Couple of them I've talked to think his feelings towards me weren't fake but he's struggling to choose between the two.

The night before my friend saw them together he was even asking my sister where I was while he was out...he may be just super bold but I wouldn't be talking to anyone's family if I wasn't genuine in my emotions.

So who knows, still haven't heard from him since I contacted him the night of, so I'm probably just going to let it ride.

Take that as a warning sign you haven't heard from him because he is guilty of being caught with his ex. Red Flags dear just do you.

That's what I figured, I've had a similar situation happen a couple of years ago with a Scorpio, didn't hear from him for a week or so them he sent me a Facebook invite to a show (which I knew he was trying to see me at) but when I didn't respond he personally invited me and then when I showed up he had a 2 hour convo with me over how much he adores me and how bad he felt felt about it...

It's definitely starting to all seem too familiar LOL

Posted by Octoberbaby91

Posted by TaurusOne
He seemed to be genuine, he's hung around my friend group quite a bit, and they are all shocked by it because of how he acted towards me. They are pretty honest, so I trust their opinions, a Couple of them I've talked to think his feelings towards me weren't fake but he's struggling to choose between the two.

The night before my friend saw them together he was even asking my sister where I was while he was out...he may be just super bold but I wouldn't be talking to anyone's family if I wasn't genuine in my emotions.

So who knows, still haven't heard from him since I contacted him the night of, so I'm probably just going to let it ride.

Take that as a warning sign you haven't heard from him because he is guilty of being caught with his ex. Red Flags dear just do you.

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I agree with the guilt thing. Not sure what you should do about it, but the avoidance due to guilt...God...hard one. Hope it works out either way. The good thing is that it's early enough in the dating phase that no one really has skin in the game. So, take your time and do what you think is best for you.

Yeah it is hard, I do have strong feelings for him so I'll give him the chance if he wants to talk, but I also won't be waiting around. Thanks for the advice guys, I feel better about the situation whichever way it goes!

Posted by Rabbit
Here's a hint...if you don't want a guy you "have strong feelings for" playing the field, don't tell him you don't want to be exclusive with him. Period.

Any man who with an ounce of self esteem isn't going to be strung along waiting for you to decide where you stand. He'll find someone who IS willing to decide. You aren't entitled to his time and effort if you aren't willing to reciprocate.

Do yourself a favor OP....take this advice or continue talking to none scorpio men about what scorpio men do

I was being exclusive, and told him so, I wrote that in previous comments. When I said I wanted to date more, to clarify, I meant I wanted to get to know him more (ex: longer than a month) before we jump into things. I know he knew what I meant because there was a conversation about it.

There's been too many times I've dated guys to find out they weren't who I thought they were or have had other personality traits come out later on, so I think it is completely reasonable to get to know someone before jumping in.

But that may just be where Scorpios and Tauruses differ!

That makes sense, we are dating so I guess he doesn't owe me the honesty, I was just upfront with him and would hope for the same. I don't think I should solely be the one to compromise in any relationship, and if that's what is expected perhaps you are right and we are not ideal.

So if anyone is curious I ran into him at the bar the other night...

He approached me at the bar and started to apologize over and over. He began to explains that it was an always situation for him and he didn't know how to tell me that it would be weird w her there. Apparently they are still cool but she still has feelings for him. He claims that he just stayed on her couch bc he was drunk and didn't have a ride home, she did try and get him to come to the bedroom but was unsuccessful. He continued to reassure me that he hasn't touched her in months and that he really cares for me and likes me and has no feelings towards her. Then he brought up that he was being bothered by something else, he is friends with my ex...they aren't super close (they've talked like once in the past few years) but in the same friend group. I knew it was bothering him so we were flying under the radar at bars since we all have a lot of mutual friends but I didn't realize how much it bothered him...apparently he has been trying to avoid me but hasn't been able to help it bc "he keeps liking me more and more." I told him it was a lot to process, I wasn't expecting to see him out (he also told me he showed up bc he saw my friends posting pictures at the bar online). Then he proceeded to say he wished he would have atleast had sex w me (which I feel the same about, our sexual chemistry was out of control but he would always stop it riiiiiiiight before anything would happen, for the build up after a month not to happen it is super hard). I went out to the patio to sit w my friends, a guy came up and started talking to me and he couldn't help himself and came and sat in between us. He then continued apologizing and reassuring me how much he likes me. Even as I was leaving he followed me all the way out telling me how sorry he was and how he cares for me. He said it wasn't fair to try and keep me to himself when I was unaware that he was still deciding if he wanted to date me bc of his ex. We had a super long texting conversation after the bar and he decided he needed to take sometime to think about the situation.

Idk what is going to happen, it probably come down to the next time we see eachother. Usually even if he starts out playing it cool when we are out he always hovers and ends up right next to me holding my hand under the table or putting his legs around mine...he said he wasn't going to talk to me the other night but obviously he couldn't help himself so we will see...I just don't know why my ex is such a big deal to him

he doesn't know what he wants and he is stringing you along not on purpose but he is confused. Do not sleep with him that is bs with that statement he made it wouldn't have made a difference he just wanted to get in your panties before you found out the madness. He sounds emotional manipulative too. It is not about his circle of friends and your ex he is just guilty he just got caught and trying to flip it around so you feel sorry for him. Sometimes even the most charming men are the biggest assholes I say cut your losses he is not over his ex that's a lie.

Cool, thank you for the advice! To prevent any further stress in my life w this what should I do when I see him out? We hang out with the same people and both go out regularly so I see him often...