Trying to understand this Taurus...help?

I'm a Libra who met a Taurus through work. I thought he was really cute but didn't think much of it b/c he's a few years younger.

After a few months of exchanging smiles, catching him staring at me and light chitchat, we started FB messaging a lot. In person, he started getting pretty shy and blush a lot around me, which I actually found endearing. We make tentative plans to hang out.

Well, the fun stopped when he told me his ex was back in the picture and he wanted to work things out. So I kept my distance while being cordial.

A few weeks later, he leaves his position. He gives me his number but won't re-add me on FB (I had deleted him lol...not to be mean but bc I developed feelings and didn't want to see any loveydovey things or be tempted to look).
He apologizes for not adding me and I don't ask questions.

A month later of not seeing or talking to him, he sends me a FB request and it looks like him & the ex are through. He doesn't text me though. So a week later, I couldn't stand it and I shoot him a funny text (he responds). A few days later, I like a photo he posts, he immediately likes one of mine, then I like one of his, then he messages me a winky face. I laughed and told him goodnight.

I'm being really patient bc I think he's a moody, slow mover (I mean that in the best of ways lol). But I do like him.

For all you Bulls, does this still seem promising or is it just harmless flirting on his part?

There's more details but I tried to keep this as short as possible 🙂

So why on earth would you rush into this knowing he just broke up with someone else? and sometimes it fails when one person isn't ready for commitment especially after breaking up.

1. Why rush take the time like before and get to know each other better and no sex yet. And keep distance like before too. And don't get attached too quickly with this one.

Or

2. Have sex first thing then and then strike a conversation to see if there's a connection seems like people have sex first with no feelings attached to see if they compatible first..you never know.

Does he work since he left his position?
How long have you known him?

it sounds like he might be interested but take things slow. be friends for a while. keep cultivating your friendship.

more promising than anything i've seen here in recent...years jeezuz

Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428
Does he work since he left his position?
How long have you known him?

I'm really not too sure. I heard through a coworker he was a looking for another job.

Met him a year ago, didn't start talking until this February/ March.

Yeah, I kinda should consider his feelings, huh? Lol my bad.

I wouldn't want to hook up with a Taurus guy on the rebound. Sorry. It doesn't sound promising. Taureans never forget an old love completely that fast.

Thanks. Another coworker told me him and the ex had been on and off for months.

Also, I've kind of wondered if I've been showing him enough signs that yes I'm still interested.

I've been playing it safe. When he requested me on FB but never said anything, I wasn't sure if he wanted to be friends or was still interested or just wanted to hookup or what.

When I sent the funny text a week later, he responded a couple hours later but I never said anything after. Idk, It was one of those days and I figured he was never going to respond so when he finally did I was like whatever. Looking back, I think he might have a new job and couldn't answer until then.

An hour after, he sent me a request on another social media site that I never go on. I didn't answer that either, but I posted on FB, and he deleted the request on the other site. And now I'm thinking when he sent the winky face the other day, I should've said more. But I don't know what he wants so, like I said...I've been playing it safe...

We're both in our 20s, but there's an age gap and an education difference that I hope won't bother him (it doesn't bother me) :/

But, either way, I don't wanna be the rebound girl either. So I should focus on other guys I guess. Sadly 😢

Ugh. Libras suck.

Stop over thinking things. Stop trying to double guess what he is thinking, what he thinks you're thinking, what he thinks you're thinking what he is thinking.

Take things at face value and get to know him more. When you know more then you can make the decision.

You're playing hot and cold with him. It's not nice. He has been fairly straightforward with you. He could be a decent person. Don't discard an opportunity because you're sure (for the next 5 minutes) that you've got it all figured out.

If he is friendly be friendly back. It's that easy.

Lol, do you think I *like* being this way?! No! Haha

But I'm not playing hot and cold on purpose. That's actually how I felt he was being. I didn't realize I may have come across that way to him until I wrote this post. At the end of the day, I want him to know I'm still interested whenever he's ready.

always keep your options. also only put in the same amount of effort he does. you're too good to be lingering over someone

Posted by Nevermore

Posted by orangey
Lol, do you think I *like* being this way?! No! Haha

But I'm not playing hot and cold on purpose. That's actually how I felt he was being. I didn't realize I may have come across that way to him until I wrote this post. At the end of the day, I want him to know I'm still interested whenever he's ready.

Jeane is a libra too with a successful relationship with Taurus.


And to that last question, if he's still busy with that on/off relationship with other. Best to avoid it till he sets up. It'll take a long time though.

click to expand

guilty as charged. 😄

Posted by jeane

Posted by Nevermore

Posted by orangey
Lol, do you think I *like* being this way?! No! Haha

But I'm not playing hot and cold on purpose. That's actually how I felt he was being. I didn't realize I may have come across that way to him until I wrote this post. At the end of the day, I want him to know I'm still interested whenever he's ready.

Jeane is a libra too with a successful relationship with Taurus.


And to that last question, if he's still busy with that on/off relationship with other. Best to avoid it till he sets up. It'll take a long time though.

guilty as charged. 😄

click to expand

Lol I was wondering how you read me so well! It was actually kinda scary. But you're a Libra so now that makes sense lol

Posted by orangey
Lol, do you think I *like* being this way?! No! Haha

But I'm not playing hot and cold on purpose. That's actually how I felt he was being. I didn't realize I may have come across that way to him until I wrote this post. At the end of the day, I want him to know I'm still interested whenever he's ready.

i agree with nevermore.

this is going to take some time. you're really going to have to patient.

don't have an agenda though. ultimately, what is a relationship? it's a friendship with passion. he might not be ready for the passion, and like everyone else has advised you, nor should you be providing that, but everyone needs a friend regardless of what is going on in their life. be that constant and consistent companion for now. worry about the next step when you get to it.

Posted by orangey

Posted by jeane

Posted by Nevermore

Posted by orangey
Lol, do you think I *like* being this way?! No! Haha

But I'm not playing hot and cold on purpose. That's actually how I felt he was being. I didn't realize I may have come across that way to him until I wrote this post. At the end of the day, I want him to know I'm still interested whenever he's ready.

Jeane is a libra too with a successful relationship with Taurus.


And to that last question, if he's still busy with that on/off relationship with other. Best to avoid it till he sets up. It'll take a long time though.

guilty as charged. 😄

Lol I was wondering how you read me so well! It was actually kinda scary. But you're a Libra so now that makes sense lol

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lol, honestly we do suck sometimes. the nonsense i put my bull through in the beginning because i ran hot and cold thinking i knew everything that he was, everything that was going to happen, jumping 5 steps ahead, plotting out my options and then getting overwhelmed by my feelings, to find myself at square 1 again.

Yep, sounds like I was getting ready to go down that path too! Lol but I'm reformed now--I'll focus on being his friend and we'll go from there.

Last question...I want to reach out to him again but I don't know if I should just wait for him to do that?? Or just do it...I feel a bit crappy now because I've reached out to him only to kinda shut him down without realizing.

Posted by orangey
Yep, sounds like I was getting ready to go down that path too! Lol but I'm reformed now--I'll focus on being his friend and we'll go from there.

Last question...I want to reach out to him again but I don't know if I should just wait for him to do that?? Or just do it...I feel a bit crappy now because I've reached out to him only to kinda shut him down without realizing.

What would you do if you happened to do the same thing to a good friend of yours? Would you contact them or would you wait for them to come to you?

Bye!

Ughhh I'm back and I just need to vent.

We haven't talked! I didn't know what his situation really was so I was too scared to reach out. 😢

But I really think I posted something that pissed him off and I know exactly what it was. Also one of my male friends (someone we both worked with who likes me) kept commenting on EVERYTHING I posted for awhile until he finally got the message it annoyed me.

Anyway, Taurus ignored my request on another app (he posted something right after I requested him and never acknowledged it - just like I did to him). So I deleted it. I commented on one of his posts a few days later and he just ignored me and posted something else so I deleted it. He never ignored me before 😢

I'm like ok, guess he doesn't like me anymore. Unfollowed him. Maybe posted a meme about being single lol. Just tried to focus on other things and keeping an eye out on other guys.

After a month of not interacting at all, I liked one of his posts. All he does is post videos - he never writes anything. Well, right after I liked it, he posted excitedly that he was looking for two tickets to a concert. Then he posted something else excitedly again. I was like hmm...wow, he never writes anything...that's out of character for him.

It's silly but I just got a weird feeling about it...

Later on, I was like "hmm, I feel like he's going to start posting cute animal and baby videos again." Which he used to post a lot when we were talking and I always liked them. He hadn't posted any since then. A little while later, boom, there they are. I didn't like any of them though...

I feel stupid for writing this; frustrated I haven't found another guy by now and annoyed that I like him and he's not talking to me. Ugh!!!

I just hate this...what should I do?!

Lol

Just ask him out!!! Stop this online shit.. You are not kids!! Or are you? How old are you?

Posted by Redoctober2000

Posted by orangey
Ughhh I'm back and I just need to vent.

We haven't talked! I didn't know what his situation really was so I was too scared to reach out. 😢

But I really think I posted something that pissed him off and I know exactly what it was. Also one of my male friends (someone we both worked with who likes me) kept commenting on EVERYTHING I posted for awhile until he finally got the message it annoyed me.

Anyway, Taurus ignored my request on another app (he posted something right after I requested him and never acknowledged it - just like I did to him). So I deleted it. I commented on one of his posts a few days later and he just ignored me and posted something else so I deleted it. He never ignored me before 😢

I'm like ok, guess he doesn't like me anymore. Unfollowed him. Maybe posted a meme about being single lol. Just tried to focus on other things and keeping an eye out on other guys.

After a month of not interacting at all, I liked one of his posts. All he does is post videos - he never writes anything. Well, right after I liked it, he posted excitedly that he was looking for two tickets to a concert. Then he posted something else excitedly again. I was like hmm...wow, he never writes anything...that's out of character for him.

It's silly but I just got a weird feeling about it...

Later on, I was like "hmm, I feel like he's going to start posting cute animal and baby videos again." Which he used to post a lot when we were talking and I always liked them. He hadn't posted any since then. A little while later, boom, there they are. I didn't like any of them though...

I feel stupid for writing this; frustrated I haven't found another guy by now and annoyed that I like him and he's not talking to me. Ugh!!!

I just hate this...what should I do?!

Move on... He's not interested into. When a Taurus is interested and especially for not want to lose you, they charge full speed ahead.

Stay single until someone else comes along. You don't have to be "frustrated I haven't found another guy by now"... You sound desperate. It's not a race. Stay single and enjoy your freedom and the right one will eventually turn up!

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Yeah, that's so not the answer I wanted. it is what it is though. I hate to sound desperate. It's just I was really closed off and working on myself for years. I wasn't even looking or expecting anything when he showed up. I actually felt comfortable talking to him and WANTED to get to know him which usually just doesn't happen for me. I thought something I posted pissed him off or maybe the guys who comment on my stuff or maybe...I mean it could be anything. I'm sad now. But I'm not going to keep grasping at straws when i mean it's clear as day.

Yeah, when he told me before that his ex came in the picture, I so appreciated his honesty and it made life so much easier.

And when he added me on fb after they broke up and after a month of us not seeing/talking to each other, I got pretty excited. But then I got thrown off when he didn't initiate conversation...and everything just got murky from there...I got kinda guarded and started doing my libra thing...over analyzing, etc. So it's been pretty miserable and I absolutely hate this.

This hurts but I'm just going to stay busy and whatever. Ugh, I just wanna kick myself for every time I even thought about him. What a waste! There's tons of other guys, hopefully I'll eventually find the one for me.

If you want to move on, just completely cut it off. Block him and what not that way you can't message or interact with him.

Yes, it will suck... yes, it will be hard not to interact with him, yes, you will think about him, but that will fade in time. Do you... kick yourself straight in the arse when you think about contact him...think about the negative aspects of it.

In time... you won't think about him. Just do you. Think of ALL the time you wasted... that a long time. Keep it moving hun...

Thank you, I'll definitely keep in mind all the disgusting time I wasted, lol. That's a good motivator.

oh orangey, i could shake you like a crying baby.

Noooooo!...lol...I'm afraid to ask why...but tell me anyway

Posted by orangey
Noooooo!...lol...I'm afraid to ask why...but tell me anyway

lol, i told you to treat him like you would a friend. what did you do? you cut off communication! now time has passed and things are weird.

Posted by Redoctober2000

Posted by orangey
This hurts but I'm just going to stay busy and whatever. Ugh, I just wanna kick myself for every time I even thought about him. What a waste! There's tons of other guys, hopefully I'll eventually find the one for me.

Just remember:

1) "all that glitters is not gold";

2)"all good things come to those who wait";

3)"there's nothing worse in the world for a woman than a worthless man dragging her down" ;

4) these days there are more chances of getting a camel through the eye of a needle than a decent man" ;

5)"you'll get there in the end" ;

6) where there is hope, there is life";

Enjoy life OP!!! Good luck. Your fortune awaits! Grab it with all your mite! 😄

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lmao, #4 is hilarious, made me laugh...love all of them. Thanks for making me smile today, I needed to. 🙂

Posted by jeane

Posted by orangey
Noooooo!...lol...I'm afraid to ask why...but tell me anyway

lol, i told you to treat him like you would a friend. what did you do? you cut off communication! now time has passed and things are weird.

click to expand

Yeah I was scared bc I wasn't sure if what I *thought* was the case with him was really the case...many times how I view ppl I'm still getting to know and who they really are are two different things.

Unfortunately he ignored me when I finally did reach out in July. It's weird because I felt like I was crossing some invisible boundary even as I did it. It was not a nice feeling at all and I don't want to remember it and I'm looking forward to forgetting this whole thing.

Posted by orangey

Posted by jeane

Posted by orangey
Noooooo!...lol...I'm afraid to ask why...but tell me anyway

lol, i told you to treat him like you would a friend. what did you do? you cut off communication! now time has passed and things are weird.

Yeah I was scared bc I wasn't sure if what I *thought* was the case with him was really the case...many times how I view ppl I'm still getting to know and who they really are are two different things.

Unfortunately he ignored me when I finally did reach out in July. It's weird because I felt like I was crossing some invisible boundary even as I did it. It was not a nice feeling at all and I don't want to remember it and I'm looking forward to forgetting this whole thing.

click to expand

don't forget this. forget him yes, but learn from this episode. i think the lesson here (in addition to busy's sayings) i think is don't count your chickens before they hatch! you got analysis paralysis (i am a card carrying member).

next time try to go with the flow and don't commit yourself (emotionally, mentally) until they have proven themselves to you. these guys have to win you over first! and with that, you will have all the confidence you need. there is a job going and you are hiring but only, if and when, the right candidate comes along. the interview process is conducted over a period of time however, the right person has to impress you enough to know they will value you.

until then, well, keep your eyes peeled and stay selective.

Thank you so much. I never thought of it that way (that they have to prove themselves to me, and looking at it like a hiring process). That's really helpful for the future. I definitely learned my lesson not to mentally/emotionally commit too soon. Thanks for helping through this since I first posted this. 🙂