Would it be weird to get him a birthday gift?

I'm questioning if I should due to the dynamics. Let me give you the deets! Sorry, for the novel!!
I knew of him and we talked briefly but then I dated his coworker. I didn't know they knew each other until I was my exs date to one of their ceremonies. I went through my unfiltered message requests and saw he messaged me a month back. We finally hung out a week before he was leaving the country (military) and we hooked up about every other night after that. Lots of chemistry between us. He would text me all day, mostly sexual energy or planning the next time we'd see each other. We would cuddle, talk about our lives, cuddle some more and eventually fall asleep. When he left early for work he'd kiss me goodbye and told me to stay however long. He kept talking about us in the future, as in when he came back from deployment. At this point I was only thinking it was just a hookup type thing considering the situation. UNTIL, I had kinda goofed up and mentioned I slept with my ex after he had left. He got angry, called me gross, etc. I apologized a lot and told him I didn't know what we established. The next day he said he was drunk, but it was still crappy of me and he said his intention was to "date me." I said agreed that it could be a possibility, and he said we have to work on things. Since he's actually left the country, the texts are more casual and sparse. Assuming I wanted to get him a gift, I'd have to do so soon to get it there by his birthday. I don't know how to send it, so should I ask or not bother?! Sorry to bore you!

People give gifts because they are nice and caring just because.. but not always good if you don't know what they like or not.

If your my 3x hell no not sending gifts to that ex for a reason.

Posted by busyeyes88
What would be the point of sending him a gift? What are your intentions by giving him a gift? What do you expect to gain/happen through giving him a gift? Is this your way to get back into his "good graces after sleeping with your ex?

I want it to show that I care and am genuinely interested in him. I just don't know how he feels about me or if he likes me beyond a hookup. Nothing has been defined and that's why I'm skeptical of I should or not. Simply confused.

I don't get why women would date a military...or maybe I do.

Posted by Palerio
I don't get why women would date a military...or maybe I do.

Uniforms.

Posted by libralotus

Posted by Palerio
I don't get why women would date a military...or maybe I do.

Uniforms.

click to expand

I get that.

But apart from that, what's the point of being in a relationship with a hot man if you can only have sex with him sporadically.

Personally I wouldn't get him a gift- but fuck it.
Maaaaybe it would depend on what type of gift you're going to give?
Like if he's deployed, an iTunes voucher thingy would be cool so he can download a shitload of music to listen to while he's away.
Simple but thoughtful. Very no strings.
Or I dunno, whatevs but yeh, the type of gift is the key I reckon.
If you wanna send a gift just do it but choose wisely.

You spend money on a guy who hasn't done anything for you. And mulitple people can be doing the same. Do for you but don't expect anything back or get angry either. You spend your money on whomever you want to though.

And many military men would be wise to break up while in the service. And but if you guys are together and make it work then both should be sending gifts to each other regular basis bit just birthday and special occasion.

Posted by wagtail
Personally I wouldn't get him a gift- but fuck it.
Maaaaybe it would depend on what type of gift you're going to give?
Like if he's deployed, an iTunes voucher thingy would be cool so he can download a shitload of music to listen to while he's away.
Simple but thoughtful. Very no strings.
Or I dunno, whatevs but yeh, the type of gift is the key I reckon.
If you wanna send a gift just do it but choose wisely.

My issues is just deciphering his intentions with me. I would like to thing he genuinely liked me, but I really don't think it's the case. I just thought I'd send him a cool book, some junk food or some funny socks since he use to make fun of my cat/zombie ones. Or just not send anything. Don't know. There's so much confusion. He has a Venus in Aries..... Head games.

Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428
You spend money on a guy who hasn't done anything for you. And mulitple people can be doing the same. Do for you but don't expect anything back or get angry either. You spend your money on whomever you want to though.

I wouldn't even expect anything other than a thank you. I just think it would make my intent pretty clear. So should I just ask him where to send it if I decide to do so?

Posted by libralotus

Posted by wagtail
Personally I wouldn't get him a gift- but fuck it.
Maaaaybe it would depend on what type of gift you're going to give?
Like if he's deployed, an iTunes voucher thingy would be cool so he can download a shitload of music to listen to while he's away.
Simple but thoughtful. Very no strings.
Or I dunno, whatevs but yeh, the type of gift is the key I reckon.
If you wanna send a gift just do it but choose wisely.

My issues is just deciphering his intentions with me. I would like to thing he genuinely liked me, but I really don't think it's the case. I just thought I'd send him a cool book, some junk food or some funny socks since he use to make fun of my cat/zombie ones. Or just not send anything. Don't know. There's so much confusion. He has a Venus in Aries..... Head games.

click to expand

Yeh I get where you're coming from.
What I'm trying to say though, is stuff the head games.
If I was putting this much thought into something so basic Id be like, not worth the effort

BUT since you would like to gift him something, the main concern here is YOUR intentions, not his.
You can literally only see things from your own perspective and you can only control your own feelings and actions.
There isn't a Hallmark card in the universe that will somehow decipher what he's thinking simply because he's on the receiving end...
So...
I'd go with the socks 😛

Yes and see what is actions is by doing that. You'll be able to know just how much he would like it or not by the tone or action or Skype time to make a decision.

Posted by wagtail

Posted by libralotus

Posted by wagtail
Personally I wouldn't get him a gift- but fuck it.
Maaaaybe it would depend on what type of gift you're going to give?
Like if he's deployed, an iTunes voucher thingy would be cool so he can download a shitload of music to listen to while he's away.
Simple but thoughtful. Very no strings.
Or I dunno, whatevs but yeh, the type of gift is the key I reckon.
If you wanna send a gift just do it but choose wisely.

My issues is just deciphering his intentions with me. I would like to thing he genuinely liked me, but I really don't think it's the case. I just thought I'd send him a cool book, some junk food or some funny socks since he use to make fun of my cat/zombie ones. Or just not send anything. Don't know. There's so much confusion. He has a Venus in Aries..... Head games.

Yeh I get where you're coming from.
What I'm trying to say though, is stuff the head games.
If I was putting this much thought into something so basic Id be like, not worth the effort

BUT since you would like to gift him something, the main concern here is YOUR intentions, not his.
You can literally only see things from your own perspective and you can only control your own feelings and actions.
There isn't a Hallmark card in the universe that will somehow decipher what he's thinking simply because he's on the receiving end...
So...
I'd go with the socks 😛

click to expand

I know, it's driving me crazy and I want to just forget about it all. For some reason I just want him, his attention, whatever. I just think he's explosive. It might be the mind games that are keeping me interested otherwise I'd dispose it.

Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428
Yes and see what is actions is by doing that. You'll be able to know just how much he would like it or not by the tone or action or Skype time to make a decision.

So go ahead and ask?

Posted by libralotus

Posted by wagtail

Posted by libralotus

Posted by wagtail
Personally I wouldn't get him a gift- but fuck it.
Maaaaybe it would depend on what type of gift you're going to give?
Like if he's deployed, an iTunes voucher thingy would be cool so he can download a shitload of music to listen to while he's away.
Simple but thoughtful. Very no strings.
Or I dunno, whatevs but yeh, the type of gift is the key I reckon.
If you wanna send a gift just do it but choose wisely.

My issues is just deciphering his intentions with me. I would like to thing he genuinely liked me, but I really don't think it's the case. I just thought I'd send him a cool book, some junk food or some funny socks since he use to make fun of my cat/zombie ones. Or just not send anything. Don't know. There's so much confusion. He has a Venus in Aries..... Head games.

Yeh I get where you're coming from.
What I'm trying to say though, is stuff the head games.
If I was putting this much thought into something so basic Id be like, not worth the effort

BUT since you would like to gift him something, the main concern here is YOUR intentions, not his.
You can literally only see things from your own perspective and you can only control your own feelings and actions.
There isn't a Hallmark card in the universe that will somehow decipher what he's thinking simply because he's on the receiving end...
So...
I'd go with the socks 😛

I know, it's driving me crazy and I want to just forget about it all. For some reason I just want him, his attention, whatever. I just think he's explosive. It might be the mind games that are keeping me interested otherwise I'd dispose it.

click to expand

Lol
Totally know what you mean.
Good luck either way ~*~

Wait a minute hm when's the last time you guys talked?

And you messed up with that 3x thing I would not want anything from you.

No don't send it is am thinking you dissed this guy ready to go into the military and his mind was on you and you do that to him.

Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428
Wait a minute hm when's the last time you guys talked?

And you messed up with that 3x thing I would not want anything from you.

No don't send it is am thinking you dissed this guy ready to go into the military and his mind was on you and you do that to him.

I don't get that though! It's not like we discussed boundaries or anything. I knew him for a week and it seemed that he just wanted a hookup. You know? I get why he would be jealous, maybe, but I don't know why he would blow up the way he did. He texted me good morning today, but haven't heard since. We've kept in touch but I just don't know how to interpret him 😢

Oh well did you ask him for the address that was your chance. To see for yourself..

Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428
Oh well did you ask him for the address that was your chance. To see for yourself..

No I haven't asked, didn't know if I should bother.

Yeah I argee @idk. But this case it is LDR with a friend no longer fwb either so should she give a gift?

Posted by FirstDecanTaurianWomen0428
Yeah I argee @idk. But this case it is LDR with a friend no longer fwb either so should she give a gift?

This is what I said. Look at me being a libra, all charming and what not. I guess I'll update you guys on his response and you can tell me your thoughts.

you give a gift because you want to give. gifts are gifts because there is no price tag. if you have a expectation of something else then they are not presents.

even a thank you is a expectation too far.

Kinky girl@Konichua. No shame.
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