Cajunspirit
@Cajunspirit
17 Years1,000+ PostsVirgo
Comments: 3 · Posts: 4208 · Topics: 163
I Love Satire
Leo
You will grab attention in any way you possibly can. Self-immolation is not out of the question. You like to kiss mirrors a lot.
Genghis Khan was a Leo, and so is Barney the Dinosaur. People still love Lucy, but less because she was a Leo.
Leos will interrupt conversation to talk, and they will place themselves bodily in the way of someone who is trying to leave before the Leo is finished saying what he or she needs to say. All Leos want parades on their birthdays.
Leos never marry because no one is good enough for them. If they do marry, they keep their spouses locked under the bathroom sink. They need physical affection at all times; unfortunately, they can't find any because everyone thinks they are irritating punks. This is why so many of the people arrested for necrophilia are Leos.
A Leo uses himself as an example of the Overman in order to describe philosophical concepts.
Some Leos decide to be homosexual even if they aren't, because they think this gives them shock value. It actually means that neither gender will want to hook up with them. In actuality, anything besides a romantic evening with themselves is considered a step down for the Leo.
Leos open doors by screaming at them. They expect their Clappers to applaud when they enter a room.
Leos are said to resemble lions. This means that they are loud, have cleft upper lips and slimy noses, and shit under trees as they walk. They snack on monkeys while watching "Entertainment Tonight".
Humility frightens Leos. That is why Jesus was a Capricorn, Buddha was an Aries, and so forth. However, "radical cult leader" is not out of the question.
Leos like to start fights with Aries. They will stomp and bloody each other regardless of whether or not they are in public. In fact, the Leos usually prefer it. You will see these fights taking place at bars, sporting events, fashion shows, or Taco Bell. If you are a clever Capricorn, you will sell tickets. Don't worry about hanging posters--Leo will take care of that in advance.
Aquarians hang posters of rock stars on their walls. Scorpios hang posters of famous disasters on their walls. Capricorns hang posters of great mathematicians on their walls. Pisceans hang posters of unicorns on their walls. Leos hang posters of themselves on their walls.
You will grab attention in any way you possibly can. Self-immolation is not out of the question. You like to kiss mirrors a lot.
Genghis Khan was a Leo, and so is Barney the Dinosaur. People still love Lucy, but less because she was a Leo.
Leos will interrupt conversation to talk, and they will place themselves bodily in the way of someone who is trying to leave before the Leo is finished saying what he or she needs to say. All Leos want parades on their birthdays.
Leos never marry because no one is good enough for them. If they do marry, they keep their spouses locked under the bathroom sink. They need physical affection at all times; unfortunately, they can't find any because everyone thinks they are irritating punks. This is why so many of the people arrested for necrophilia are Leos.
A Leo uses himself as an example of the Overman in order to describe philosophical concepts.
Some Leos decide to be homosexual even if they aren't, because they think this gives them shock value. It actually means that neither gender will want to hook up with them. In actuality, anything besides a romantic evening with themselves is considered a step down for the Leo.
Leos open doors by screaming at them. They expect their Clappers to applaud when they enter a room.
Leos are said to resemble lions. This means that they are loud, have cleft upper lips and slimy noses, and shit under trees as they walk. They snack on monkeys while watching "Entertainment Tonight".
Humility frightens Leos. That is why Jesus was a Capricorn, Buddha was an Aries, and so forth. However, "radical cult leader" is not out of the question.
Leos like to start fights with Aries. They will stomp and bloody each other regardless of whether or not they are in public. In fact, the Leos usually prefer it. You will see these fights taking place at bars, sporting events, fashion shows, or Taco Bell. If you are a clever Capricorn, you will sell tickets. Don't worry about hanging posters--Leo will take care of that in advance.
Aquarians hang posters of rock stars on their walls. Scorpios hang posters of famous disasters on their walls. Capricorns hang posters of great mathematicians on their walls. Pisceans hang posters of unicorns on their walls. Leos hang posters of themselves on their walls.
You got into computers early so you could use made-up, bullshit terminology and get away with it. Most hackers are Scorpios, as are most people who think they're going to find fame on a chat board.
You embarrass Libras because you like your coffee straight out of the bag, eaten with a spoon. You may have actually snorted Chock Full o' Nuts at one time in your life. You take your paranoid beatnik approach to life very seriously. Many Scorpios have found ways to successfully smoke in the shower.
Your number-one grudge is about never having been abducted by aliens, or being the victim of a government conspiracy. Most of those fake virus warnings or cash offers from Bill Gates are your attempt to stir something up.
Ironically, Bill Gates is a Scorpio. The fully-automated barracks he lives in should clear up any doubt.
Your master plan for world domination will never work because it involves you at the helm. It is hard for you to accept that Star Trek is fiction, and you are not a Borg leader.
Scorpios use expletives to describe philosophical concepts.
It's no wonder that Halloween falls smack in the middle of the Scorpio range. This is the only time of year when fake hauntings, sugar-induced hysteria, and impersonating Dr. Who won't get you arrested.
Scorpios have strong sex drives, because it gives them yet another opportunity to smoke.
Scorpios have much advice to give on matters that are of no concern to them. If you want to find out if someone is a Scorpio, ask them a pertinent question. Five minutes of silence later, the answer will be "I'm sorry, what?"
Scorpios are often hairy and feel that this makes them more virile. This is especially true of Scorpio women.
Scorpios cheat at the lottery. If it's automated, they can hack it.
I laughed SOOOO hard at this!! What I love about satire is there are slivers of truth to it 😉 LOL Good ready.... now if you excuse me I have to go shave 😉 hehehehe
You embarrass Libras because you like your coffee straight out of the bag, eaten with a spoon. You may have actually snorted Chock Full o' Nuts at one time in your life. You take your paranoid beatnik approach to life very seriously. Many Scorpios have found ways to successfully smoke in the shower.
Your number-one grudge is about never having been abducted by aliens, or being the victim of a government conspiracy. Most of those fake virus warnings or cash offers from Bill Gates are your attempt to stir something up.
Ironically, Bill Gates is a Scorpio. The fully-automated barracks he lives in should clear up any doubt.
Your master plan for world domination will never work because it involves you at the helm. It is hard for you to accept that Star Trek is fiction, and you are not a Borg leader.
Scorpios use expletives to describe philosophical concepts.
It's no wonder that Halloween falls smack in the middle of the Scorpio range. This is the only time of year when fake hauntings, sugar-induced hysteria, and impersonating Dr. Who won't get you arrested.
Scorpios have strong sex drives, because it gives them yet another opportunity to smoke.
Scorpios have much advice to give on matters that are of no concern to them. If you want to find out if someone is a Scorpio, ask them a pertinent question. Five minutes of silence later, the answer will be "I'm sorry, what?"
Scorpios are often hairy and feel that this makes them more virile. This is especially true of Scorpio women.
Scorpios cheat at the lottery. If it's automated, they can hack it.
I laughed SOOOO hard at this!! What I love about satire is there are slivers of truth to it 😉 LOL Good ready.... now if you excuse me I have to go shave 😉 hehehehe
*good read*
Posted by Gingerscorp
Scorpios are often hairy and feel that this makes them more virile. This is especially true of Scorpio women.
Hahaha
That's HOT @# $ % !% !@
Posted by Cajunspirit
Virgos use pointers and elaborate charts to describe philosophical concepts.
I'm AMAZINGLY anal about my documents and spreadsheets. Not that the data contained in them is of any use. But they WILL be organized as fuck.
LOL @ Leo!! I want a parade on my birthday!!!
Posted by VirgoHeroPosted by Cajunspirit
Virgos use pointers and elaborate charts to describe philosophical concepts.
I'm AMAZINGLY anal about my documents and spreadsheets. Not that the data contained in them is of any use. But they WILL be organized as fuck.
click to expand
Imagine that!! LOL!!
Haha, yeah. I found the Pisces and Scorpio to die for.
More truth in here than some of us are willing to admit 😛
More truth in here than some of us are willing to admit 😛
Posted by Shaks
bloody leos, exactly what Ive been saying all along..always try to make everything about themselves even when things have absolutely nothing to do with them.
But my birthday has to do with me Shaks. 😢
I would share my cake with you.
Posted by LeoLadyLovesToBeLoved
LOL @ Leo!! I want a parade on my birthday!!!
The clapper comment was funny too!
HAHA....cajunspirit!! thank you for posting this. I laughed so hard at some of the descriptions, especially the ones of Cancer, Aquarius, and Aries since I dated them all! Some of the things they mention in the description so silly....but sometimes so TRUE!!! 😄 lol
I told one of the cancers....and it was funny for the cancer as well.
I think my ex aquas can take it...
I would be afraid to share this with my aries friends haha....and have defintely scooped the sad Taurus under the fridge 😉 (love them all though!)
ABee
I told one of the cancers....and it was funny for the cancer as well.
I think my ex aquas can take it...
I would be afraid to share this with my aries friends haha....and have defintely scooped the sad Taurus under the fridge 😉 (love them all though!)
ABee
Posted by VirgoHeroPosted by LeoLadyLovesToBeLoved
LOL @ Leo!! I want a parade on my birthday!!!
The clapper comment was funny too!click to expand
LOL Yes!!
As was this comment:
"Leos hang posters of themselves on their walls."
Hey, why not?
Posted by LeoLadyLovesToBeLoved
As was this comment:
"Leos hang posters of themselves on their walls."
Hey, why not?
*Falls off chair laughing*
The only reason I would consider this is because of my Leo Moon 😛
ABee, happy to make you laugh 😄
i found the libra one very disappointing, then read the scorpio one and realized it was a lot more accurate for me. then i re-read the libra one and admitted to myself that it was too. we're such vapid, worthless people.
Virgos are often found opening and shutting the refrigerator door, attempting to trick the light inside.
I actually DID that when I was younger LOL Sad, but true.
Posted by ShaksPosted by VirLeogurl09Virgos are often found opening and shutting the refrigerator door, attempting to trick the light inside.
I actually DID that when I was younger LOL Sad, but true.
You havent changed much 😛click to expand
I don't even know you! LOL don't talk to me.
No, I'm not LOL 😄 the 2nd time I will be accused for being Someone else. All I have ever noticed was u following me around. So before you start butter again on a Topic just be quiet and don't converse with me. You don't need to talk like u know things, when u are so off all the time.
Posted by Shaks
😉 me likes cakeyyy 😄
If you promise to become a Naked News presenter 🙂click to expand
Just because you were nice to me, I will eat cakey in the nakey for you.... and present the news while doing it. 😄
I can multi-task.... might be my Virgo cusp.
Posted by CajunspiritPosted by LeoLadyLovesToBeLoved
As was this comment:
"Leos hang posters of themselves on their walls."
Hey, why not?
*Falls off chair laughing*
The only reason I would consider this is because of my Leo Moon 😛
click to expand
Just embrace it & hang those posters! Try having Leo Sun, Moon and Venus!!!
And to think I actually even have photos of OTHER people on my wall! AMAZING!
I still don't know how that happened 😄
Take it easy. I will be ignoring you from Here on OUT lol PEACE.
You're a strange dude.. alright peace and all but peace.
Posted by Shaks
Yummy yummy food for my tummy (thanks Lady M!) one thing I can NOT NEVER deny about these Leonine girls is they are RAWRRRRRRRrrr in bed 😄
Not that it has anything to do with you 😛 hehe
me starting to like Leolovestobeshagged 🙂
RAWRRRRR!!!
What?.... Shaks is warming up to me? I'm saving this post....
Was it the Virgo cusp that won you over or was it my willingness to get naked for you?
I kinda like that new name only you forgot the Lady part...... 😉
Or maybe you didnt! lol
Posted by VirLeogurl09
I actually DID that when I was younger LOL Sad, but true.
I'm guilty of it myself 😛
Then I found the button!!! 😄
Posted by CajunspiritPosted by VirLeogurl09
I actually DID that when I was younger LOL Sad, but true.
I'm guilty of it myself 😛
Then I found the button!!! 😄click to expand
It was a strange habit I must say, until we figure out how the damn thing works =P
Poppin' some more crack aren't ya?
lol I officially have a Stalker.
Shaks, what the hell is wrong with you today?!?! LOL You're taking this WAY too seriously. Where's your sweet cappie? 🙂
Okay, now you're scaring me. I gotta hit the road soon, I have to leave on a 3-4 hour drive.. have fun on dxp nips.
shaks wants to be tha only virgo asshole in tha world lmao
Ha, I've got VirgoHero u take the Lead.
Posted by Shaks
dude Ive been just playing all along, teasing Virgirs is quite amusing, to get them to reveal their other faces (other than their "holy virgin" one) is a good laugh 😛
This is true. I used to give shit to my virg girl ALL the time and she would bite..hook line and sinker!
I have to leave.
Posted by Shakshttp://www.hawkproxy.com/index.php?q=aHR0cDovL3d3dy5keHBuZXQuY29tL29waW5pb24vbWVzc2FnZXMuYXNwP3A9NCZpZD0xNzk3MzY2IzE3OTgxOTU% 3D##1798195">Posted by VirLeogurl09
Ha, I've got VirgoHero u take the Lead.
I thought Virgo girls were supposed to be manly, whats wrong with you?click to expand
a MAN? What have u been drinking?
I think Shak doesn't want to admit he has a Feminine side lol .. Anyway I don't have time for this, chat with LeoLadyLovesToBeLoved she was blockquoting you. Don't miss out on her. Peace.
Posted by Ike 2.0
Damn i should hang posters of myself ! why haven't i thought of that ? treetrunking brilliant i say !
lmfao
Posted by VirLeogurl09
^
I do. I have to leave.
Posted by Shakshttp://www.hawkproxy.com/index.php?q=aHR0cDovL3d3dy5keHBuZXQuY29tL29waW5pb24vbWVzc2FnZXMuYXNwP3A9NCZpZD0xNzk3MzY2IzE3OTgxOTU% 3D##1798195">Posted by VirLeogurl09
Ha, I've got VirgoHero u take the Lead.
I thought Virgo girls were supposed to be manly, whats wrong with you?
a MAN? What have u been drinking?
I think Shak doesn't want to admit he has a Feminine side lol .. Anyway I don't have time for this, chat with LeoLadyLovesToBeLoved she was blockquoting you. Don't miss out on her. Peace.click to expand
😉
Posted by CajunspiritPosted by VirLeogurl09
I actually DID that when I was younger LOL Sad, but true.
I'm guilty of it myself 😛
Then I found the button!!! 😄click to expand
haha...i did it too!!
but not because i couldn't find the button, but rather because i wanted to see what tricky move angle i could find to make it STILL be open and yet off 😉 i don't know why but i found it amusing..lol
Posted by ABee
haha...i did it too!!
but not because i couldn't find the button, but rather because i wanted to see what tricky move angle i could find to make it STILL be open and yet off 😉 i don't know why but i found it amusing..lol
Hahahahaha!
Just reading this is making me feel happy and nice inside 🙂
Posted by Ike 2.0
Damn i should hang posters of myself ! why haven't i thought of that ? treetrunking brilliant i say !
You mean you don't do that? WTF is wrong with you Ike?!! LOL
Posted by CajunspiritPosted by ABee
haha...i did it too!!
but not because i couldn't find the button, but rather because i wanted to see what tricky move angle i could find to make it STILL be open and yet off 😉 i don't know why but i found it amusing..lol
Hahahahaha!
Just reading this is making me feel happy and nice inside 🙂click to expand
🙂 it makes me happy that you understand how fun that was 😉
wanna know one more secret friend? i own a cheese holder plate with a round glass cover that has the words "cheese" on the plate so that people have no excuse to be moving it around hahaha...i am serious, i was laughing so hard when i read our description and found that! :p
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It is easy to freak out a Virgo. Tell them they have something between their teeth. Then watch them scrub frantically at the imaginary thing. Virgos are a hell of a lot of fun for assholes like us.
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Virgos are cool because they will do your laundry for you. They'll separate everything by color and fabric until it consists of fourteen loads of three things apiece. Then they will put them in the washer in alphabetical order by name of manufacturer.
Virgos are often found opening and shutting the refrigerator door, attempting to trick the light inside. Don't put cheese where it doesn't belong in a Virgo's refrigerator. He or she will go Jack Torrence on your ass. You will be stabbed with a cuticle pusher. Jack Torrence was probably a Virgo in the first half of "The Shining". After that, he went all Leo.