Need insight from Virgo men

Hi all :-)

I need some advice regarding my Virguy co-worker. Here's the situation. Over the last 2 years, we've been getting to know each other, first as co-workers and then as friends. We've been having lunch together, just the two of us, once a week for almost a year now. So around this time last year, I was seeing all the signs that he was into me and even other co-workers would mention it. We texted every day through this game app we played, we both invented work-related reasons to spend time together, he was always always there to help whenever I needed anything, he had started letting me in and talking about his family and some personal issues, he stared at me so hard I thought he was trying to look right to the bottom of me, he had begun touching me (hand on the small of my back when crossing the street and stuff like that), etc etc. But - he kept it at the office. Turned me down whenever I asked if he wanted to go out, never saying no, always saying he couldn't. So at one point, I openly declared my interest and he said he really appreciated our relationship but his life was complicated at the moment and we were just friends.

I found out he was dating someone, which he had never mentioned me to me at all. I didn't confront him, I mean we still had to work together and I didn't want to cause a scene. So I kind of worked it into a conversation matter-of-factly, just so he'd know I knew. From then on, he didn't mention her by name or ever talk about her any more than he had before, but the texting stopped. The lunches didn't and neither did all the rest.

Now I know he's not seeing her anymore since before Christmas, but obviously he wasn't the one who told me. It seems now that his interest has ramped up, now he's touching my hair, my hips, he sits so close to me when we're working on something that our shoulders touch, he tells me I'm pretty or I smell good every day. I had a week vacation and he told me that his week was long and boring and to never do that again. He actually agreed to go see a movie with me when it comes out at the end of the month. He specified he wants us to go to a theater I had mentioned to him last year and that we should go on a Friday or Saturday, not during the week.

So previously, I had felt that I was in the "work" category before because we never saw each other outside of work. Is he now switching me over to "personal life" category? Also, for the first time, he told me all about his ex, the mother of his daughter, whom he had been with for 17 years and is now divorced from for 4. He had never really gone into so much detail before. He asks me tons of questions and I don't push him with questions of my own because he hates that. He's even told me he appreciates that about me.

Anyway, I guess my question is that I don't know if we're still just friends or if he's leaning toward more. Last year I was the one inviting him out and declaring my feelings and I guess I don't want to ask him direct

He isn't going to act on this.

The Virgo is subservient in relationships. He will continue to give you the vibe of his interest, while waiting for you to take control.

You will have to lead, while he follows. If you can't be the leader/initiator in a relationship .. then you're barking up the wrong tree.

Thanks! I can be the leader, I have no problem with this. I just don't want him to play the friendship card again if I do. I'll take the lead then and see how he reacts.

Ok, to clarify, he does answer my questions when I ask them! What I meant is that I don't go all 20-questions on him all the time, I wait until I feel he's open and then I ask questions and he answers. At this point, I know more about him than people who have been working with him for longer than I have.

I was just wondering if it's "normal" behaviour for Virgos to act like you want more when you don't. I've never met a man as confusing as he is!! When it gets to the point that everyone around you is already convinced you're together, then I'm not imagining things, right?

s a Leo moon, Virgo Venus and Scorpio Mars, if that changes anything.

Posted by PurpleAqua

I was just wondering if it's "normal" behaviour for Virgos to act like you want more when you don't.

You make the assumption that he doesn't want more.

If you already have decided his mind for him, then what's the point of this thread, exactly?

You already laid it out on the line with him. If he was interested, he'd be asking the questions AND asking you out.
He's not.. After 2 years, one would think you have a life outside this Virgo..why not go live it?

If a Virgo wants you THEY WILL LET YOU KNOW especially after you've let one know you want them.

Move on.