gemmygem
@gemmygem
16 Years
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Virgo/ Libra man (continued)
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Quick update:
Yesterday night after 01:00 am, I could not sleep and just wandering around my MSN and he came online. At first I did not say anything but after like 20 mins, he was still there so I sent this message: "hi, could not sleep like me i guess? 🙂" He replied saying he was out with some friends and just checking his messages before going to bed. He did not ask anything like how r u, or why u could not sleep, etc. So I asked if his parents were still with him and he said yes. I admit that it was stupid but I made one last effort and asked him "do you like jazz" (i know he likes) and he said "yeah, kind of". At that point I got that it was very bad timing to have a conversation (he was just at home, it's been a long day, he was sleepy and tired, etc. etc.) so i said "well, it feels good and relaxing especially in rainy days like this" and stopped writing. He did not respond and went offline like 5 mins later.
I felt bad at first because he did not ask a single question and was clearly uninterested but then, like i said the timing and occasion was not right, so i should understand his behaviour.
Upon this, I decided not to go online for at least a week, or in case i need to and i see him there, not initiate any conversation. I should completely cease my excuse-based communications and not rush anything otherwise with my impatient and attention seeking modes, I am sure I will ruin all my chances and I really do not want to do that. He is truly worth of all troubles afterall 🙂
Also next time we talk, I'll apologize about yesterday night, that I should not have bothered him 😢
I was just reading some old posts here, and in one Dyar says go find a Virgo man who is a. over 30, b. settled in his job, c. not living with parents, d. not gay and e. none of those: a trekkie, wannabe or freak. He fits that description and he does not seem to be a player either, so I really want to get first his attention, then possibly his friendship, trust and eventually: love. because I know myself, and I have been observing him a lot lately (I and did some good diggin') so all I need is some luck and some feminine strategy 🙂
Yesterday night after 01:00 am, I could not sleep and just wandering around my MSN and he came online. At first I did not say anything but after like 20 mins, he was still there so I sent this message: "hi, could not sleep like me i guess? 🙂" He replied saying he was out with some friends and just checking his messages before going to bed. He did not ask anything like how r u, or why u could not sleep, etc. So I asked if his parents were still with him and he said yes. I admit that it was stupid but I made one last effort and asked him "do you like jazz" (i know he likes) and he said "yeah, kind of". At that point I got that it was very bad timing to have a conversation (he was just at home, it's been a long day, he was sleepy and tired, etc. etc.) so i said "well, it feels good and relaxing especially in rainy days like this" and stopped writing. He did not respond and went offline like 5 mins later.
I felt bad at first because he did not ask a single question and was clearly uninterested but then, like i said the timing and occasion was not right, so i should understand his behaviour.
Upon this, I decided not to go online for at least a week, or in case i need to and i see him there, not initiate any conversation. I should completely cease my excuse-based communications and not rush anything otherwise with my impatient and attention seeking modes, I am sure I will ruin all my chances and I really do not want to do that. He is truly worth of all troubles afterall 🙂
Also next time we talk, I'll apologize about yesterday night, that I should not have bothered him 😢
I was just reading some old posts here, and in one Dyar says go find a Virgo man who is a. over 30, b. settled in his job, c. not living with parents, d. not gay and e. none of those: a trekkie, wannabe or freak. He fits that description and he does not seem to be a player either, so I really want to get first his attention, then possibly his friendship, trust and eventually: love. because I know myself, and I have been observing him a lot lately (I and did some good diggin') so all I need is some luck and some feminine strategy 🙂
I have just noticed that Mr. Virgo checked my online profile in one of the communities that both of us are registered & connected!
Hmmm... Except a short business email on Fri. (in which I asked for a critical decision and also kindly enclosed two articles and a white paper that I thought he might like just for a reading) to which he replied positively this morning and signed very candidly 🙂, I have not spoken with him for a week, no messages, nothing. I have seen him online but did not write anything either.
So this must be a good sign, huh?
He is not online today (I mean, he must have gone online because he checked my profile but he was not signed in on MSN, that's that only thing a bit strange...)
Anywaya, there is a possibility that I see him this Wed. or Thu. There, I'll find out what he's up to 🙂
Hmmm... Except a short business email on Fri. (in which I asked for a critical decision and also kindly enclosed two articles and a white paper that I thought he might like just for a reading) to which he replied positively this morning and signed very candidly 🙂, I have not spoken with him for a week, no messages, nothing. I have seen him online but did not write anything either.
So this must be a good sign, huh?
He is not online today (I mean, he must have gone online because he checked my profile but he was not signed in on MSN, that's that only thing a bit strange...)
Anywaya, there is a possibility that I see him this Wed. or Thu. There, I'll find out what he's up to 🙂
gemmygem are you happy chasing this guy?
chasing part: no. i don't like chasing men at all. but i like him very much and he makes me happy even when there is little hope and i think i have no other option 😢
Yesterday I saw him as I was hoping for. We both have just become members of this local business club and there was a meeting to welcome new members. I was not sure he would come though, so I mentioned this to him the day before on MSN and he said he would. He asked me if I would be there as well.
Anyways, he came a bit later than I did, and at first we did not speak to each other. I waited him to come to me first but the room was very crowded and he apparenty knew many people. I finally noticed him standing just next to me when I was refreshing my drink, he looked at me, I said hi, he asked me whats up but then he seemed he was out of questions. ?? asked him if he was bored and he said he did not like long meetings because that's what he was doing all day these days. I asked him about his dinner last night (he had mentioned last night that he was having friends over dinner), and he smiled and said a few words. He said his parents are leaving tonight so he wanted to introduce his friends to them. I asked if he had any siblings and he said he has an elder brother. (When I asked this he looked at me for a second with a puzzled face as like "why are you asking me this, why are you interested?". Then he paused and asked me again "So, what else is up?". I started talking about the club but he seemed he was distracted and he was looking at other people in the room, checking who else was there, then two women approached to say hi to him and he hugged them and introduced to me. Then he said he needed to talk with some people so he excused himself and left. At the end of the meeting I could not see him and figured out his colleague (another member guy who works at his company) was going to leave early so he went with him.
Back home, I wrote an email saying that I was surprised he left early, but the meeting did not last long after they left and if he and his friend had stayed I might have suggested having a coffee at a nice place nearby that I know well.
He had mentioned of a band that he liked very much at an earlier conversation. So I said by the way, I think I know what kind of music he likes and suggested a similar band to him that would play in our town in a few weeks and he might be interested seeing. I also added a link to one of their songs, saying it is one of my favorites.
He replied an hour later saying he left because his colleague and many others were leaving, but seem like he did not miss a lot. he adds that he listened to the song
Anyways, he came a bit later than I did, and at first we did not speak to each other. I waited him to come to me first but the room was very crowded and he apparenty knew many people. I finally noticed him standing just next to me when I was refreshing my drink, he looked at me, I said hi, he asked me whats up but then he seemed he was out of questions. ?? asked him if he was bored and he said he did not like long meetings because that's what he was doing all day these days. I asked him about his dinner last night (he had mentioned last night that he was having friends over dinner), and he smiled and said a few words. He said his parents are leaving tonight so he wanted to introduce his friends to them. I asked if he had any siblings and he said he has an elder brother. (When I asked this he looked at me for a second with a puzzled face as like "why are you asking me this, why are you interested?". Then he paused and asked me again "So, what else is up?". I started talking about the club but he seemed he was distracted and he was looking at other people in the room, checking who else was there, then two women approached to say hi to him and he hugged them and introduced to me. Then he said he needed to talk with some people so he excused himself and left. At the end of the meeting I could not see him and figured out his colleague (another member guy who works at his company) was going to leave early so he went with him.
Back home, I wrote an email saying that I was surprised he left early, but the meeting did not last long after they left and if he and his friend had stayed I might have suggested having a coffee at a nice place nearby that I know well.
He had mentioned of a band that he liked very much at an earlier conversation. So I said by the way, I think I know what kind of music he likes and suggested a similar band to him that would play in our town in a few weeks and he might be interested seeing. I also added a link to one of their songs, saying it is one of my favorites.
He replied an hour later saying he left because his colleague and many others were leaving, but seem like he did not miss a lot. he adds that he listened to the song
and liked it very much, and I was so right in my guess about his music taste (adds a smile here). Then he says but unfortunately he may take a vacation around the concert date, so he is not sure whether he can see them. He thanks me anyway for sharing it and signs "Love" —
I replied to his response now saying that I was actually making some other guesses about him and listed a couple of them 🙂
I am writing whatever happens with him on a nearly daily basis and in detail, because I know there are many people like me who are reading these threads trying to figure out another Virgo in their world. I hope my experience (no matter I am making things right or wrong) helps them.
GG-
I replied to his response now saying that I was actually making some other guesses about him and listed a couple of them 🙂
I am writing whatever happens with him on a nearly daily basis and in detail, because I know there are many people like me who are reading these threads trying to figure out another Virgo in their world. I hope my experience (no matter I am making things right or wrong) helps them.
GG-
:::: shakes head :::::
I'm unsure what is sadder ... a woman who presents herself as desperate, or one who doesn't even realize that she is.
I'm unsure what is sadder ... a woman who presents herself as desperate, or one who doesn't even realize that she is.
P Angel,
If I like someone, what's wrong with showing it? This, I dont understand at all. People keep saying be genuine, be honest, no games and then when you present exactly how you feel you are being criticised.
Nope, sorry, this is not me. I am totally comfortable with who I am and what I do.
If I like someone, what's wrong with showing it? This, I dont understand at all. People keep saying be genuine, be honest, no games and then when you present exactly how you feel you are being criticised.
Nope, sorry, this is not me. I am totally comfortable with who I am and what I do.
What is wrong with it is how other people, mainly him, are viewing you .... and you have no clue that it is anything other than what you have as your self-image.
Of course you should be genuine ... however, if they guy isn't into you, then who are you being genuine for?
Yourself?
Yourself?
Because you like him so much ... you have yourself believing that he is enjoying/appreciating/loving your little gestures .. when in reality, he's just being polite .. and you've no clue.
You are making his responses into being things other than what they are because you want it to be so ... you see yourself as being so sweet to him because you like him and any response he has back to you, you are making them into things they aren't ... because you like him and so you want these things to mean somethign they aren't.
for example ....
"He thanks me anyway for sharing it and signs "Love" —"
You have the word love in quotes with a question mark ... to mean that because he used this word casually, you have zeroed in on it to question in hopes, that this word for the ending of a message means more than it does.
You are making his responses into being things other than what they are because you want it to be so ... you see yourself as being so sweet to him because you like him and any response he has back to you, you are making them into things they aren't ... because you like him and so you want these things to mean somethign they aren't.
for example ....
"He thanks me anyway for sharing it and signs "Love" —"
You have the word love in quotes with a question mark ... to mean that because he used this word casually, you have zeroed in on it to question in hopes, that this word for the ending of a message means more than it does.
Of course he's not into me. He does not know me yet. And I certainly do not want to misrepresent myself but as I said to tiki, I believe I have no other option. See, here is my challenge:
We are hardly in the same environment. Yes we work in a project together but we are more like in supporting roles, so expect the review meetings every other month, we do not get in the same room. And when we are in the room, we only speak business, nothing personal. So he sees only my professional face, for like 10 minutes, because those meetings are crowded and sometimes we even do not talk. I have been using these times just for observing him closely and it helped but they did not bring us any closer. I think Virgos look for some mental connection so unless we share some personal moment or space where we can have some talk and stare each other, we may never get that link established or it would take a decade. Therefore, I must find a way to see him out of work.
Secondly, I am an average gal at first look, because I do not like dressing, putting make up, pampering myself at all. I seldomly let my hair down and wear casual clothes with no high heels. But I am said to have a natural and nice facial beauty, with gorgeous eyes and smile. Plus, when I do dress and make up, I can turn many heads, so I am very confident that I can attract and seduce any man if I want to. However, again, I can not do that in a business environment because it will not fit in (Yes, I pay attention to what I wear and how do I look whenever I have a meeting with him but I have a certain style at work and I can not change that much, or it will get others attention). So, in order to physically get to him too, I have to make him take a second look at me out of work.
Third, I generally want to know a man in his natural ways preferable before he gets attracted to me because when they are attracted the way they behave changes and they get love blinded. I do not want that. Therefore I must be friends with him and spend as much time as I can with him as his bud' before he starts calling me hon'.
Finally, I am not good in speaking unless I am in the mood, but writing is definitely something that I am very talented at. I always choose the right words and I can be subtle, interesting, manipulating, enchanting, dominating, anything I want without the reader even can tell. So, I prefer reaching him with texts, emails and online chats rether than spoken words. I will keep doing that consiste
We are hardly in the same environment. Yes we work in a project together but we are more like in supporting roles, so expect the review meetings every other month, we do not get in the same room. And when we are in the room, we only speak business, nothing personal. So he sees only my professional face, for like 10 minutes, because those meetings are crowded and sometimes we even do not talk. I have been using these times just for observing him closely and it helped but they did not bring us any closer. I think Virgos look for some mental connection so unless we share some personal moment or space where we can have some talk and stare each other, we may never get that link established or it would take a decade. Therefore, I must find a way to see him out of work.
Secondly, I am an average gal at first look, because I do not like dressing, putting make up, pampering myself at all. I seldomly let my hair down and wear casual clothes with no high heels. But I am said to have a natural and nice facial beauty, with gorgeous eyes and smile. Plus, when I do dress and make up, I can turn many heads, so I am very confident that I can attract and seduce any man if I want to. However, again, I can not do that in a business environment because it will not fit in (Yes, I pay attention to what I wear and how do I look whenever I have a meeting with him but I have a certain style at work and I can not change that much, or it will get others attention). So, in order to physically get to him too, I have to make him take a second look at me out of work.
Third, I generally want to know a man in his natural ways preferable before he gets attracted to me because when they are attracted the way they behave changes and they get love blinded. I do not want that. Therefore I must be friends with him and spend as much time as I can with him as his bud' before he starts calling me hon'.
Finally, I am not good in speaking unless I am in the mood, but writing is definitely something that I am very talented at. I always choose the right words and I can be subtle, interesting, manipulating, enchanting, dominating, anything I want without the reader even can tell. So, I prefer reaching him with texts, emails and online chats rether than spoken words. I will keep doing that consiste
consistenly until he feels totally comfortable and open with me (which he will at one point, this never fails with me). Then, I will take it to the next level. (I mean, when I wrote about this concert, my goal was not going to the concert with him, I was just giving him the subtle message "hey, I am comfortable doing something with you, I dont take you as a stranger anymore, so you should feel the same way").
So this is not desperation. I am doing what ?? should do rahther than leaving everyting to fate's hands. If it will not work, it will not work, but I am more than willing to take my chances, because I think he's worth it (if he was not, I would not even move my finger).
So this is not desperation. I am doing what ?? should do rahther than leaving everyting to fate's hands. If it will not work, it will not work, but I am more than willing to take my chances, because I think he's worth it (if he was not, I would not even move my finger).
And I questionmarked "Love", because he was not using this word before, he has started using it lately and consistently, after I began acting sweet. If I was trying to be polite but wanted to hint other person that I was not interested I would rather use a safer word like "see u" "take care" etc., which he used to before.
A question P Angel:
"Because you like him so much ... you have yourself believing that he is enjoying/appreciating/loving your little gestures .. when in reality, he's just being polite .. and you've no clue."
You say he is just being polite. If you were him and if you had really enjoyed/appreciated/loved my gestures, what would you do then? I mean, how can you tell that he is not?
"Because you like him so much ... you have yourself believing that he is enjoying/appreciating/loving your little gestures .. when in reality, he's just being polite .. and you've no clue."
You say he is just being polite. If you were him and if you had really enjoyed/appreciated/loved my gestures, what would you do then? I mean, how can you tell that he is not?
UPDATE!!!
Saw Virgo today (btw, he has not answered my last message in which I was listing some of my observations of him, including his personal traits). We were in the break room having some refreshments. I was standing at a corner, and he came by me after he spoke briefly to some people. We said hi and started talking about our project, but I noticed something strange. His looks I mean. He was like X-raying me, I mean he was asking a question then was listing to me while he was like scanning my whole face. I've never seen anything like that! Then at one point, I said something funny about how stubborn I could be sometimes, he similed and said "So you think I am stubborn, too? Even more than you?" (I had mentioned he was in my message). I was frozen for a second and I think I blushed. I got serious and said "You may be stubborn but you are a very nice man I think". He looked into my eyes and did not say anything, just a very slight but grateful smile... It was a very delicate moment! Then he said he needed to get back to his meeting, he started to walk, then turned around and called my name. When I looked, he said in a hesitant way "maybe I call you later"?? (Not sure if it means anything, but, among the things we talked, there is nothing that will require him to contact me businesswise. I mean, when he said he would call, I though he meant it in a personal way, like "I call you to have a talk" etc.
I think it is progress. IDK but this is the first time that he's showed some interest in me.
Saw Virgo today (btw, he has not answered my last message in which I was listing some of my observations of him, including his personal traits). We were in the break room having some refreshments. I was standing at a corner, and he came by me after he spoke briefly to some people. We said hi and started talking about our project, but I noticed something strange. His looks I mean. He was like X-raying me, I mean he was asking a question then was listing to me while he was like scanning my whole face. I've never seen anything like that! Then at one point, I said something funny about how stubborn I could be sometimes, he similed and said "So you think I am stubborn, too? Even more than you?" (I had mentioned he was in my message). I was frozen for a second and I think I blushed. I got serious and said "You may be stubborn but you are a very nice man I think". He looked into my eyes and did not say anything, just a very slight but grateful smile... It was a very delicate moment! Then he said he needed to get back to his meeting, he started to walk, then turned around and called my name. When I looked, he said in a hesitant way "maybe I call you later"?? (Not sure if it means anything, but, among the things we talked, there is nothing that will require him to contact me businesswise. I mean, when he said he would call, I though he meant it in a personal way, like "I call you to have a talk" etc.
I think it is progress. IDK but this is the first time that he's showed some interest in me.
If there is anything I've learned in the pass year or so it's that anything a person chases in life runs away. Specifically so if it's a woman chasing a man. I'm not saying I'm happy with this observation, just something that is true.
I've been through a similar situation with a Virgo before, except he approached me and trust me if he hadn't approached me there would have been no way our paths would have ever crossed.
But P is right, you are putting yourself forward as a little desperate. I mean come on you sent him an email in which you stated the observations you made of him, plus his personal trait. If I were him I would have thought it was creepy hence not respond back. I'm sure he knows by now that you are interested. You're just delusional right now and are making excuses for him.
I mean you said he was worth it, yet in another post you said you didn't know him at all. I'm sorry yes, you can observe someone, but one can not by no means compile the complexity of someones personality through observation alone.
If there is one thing about Virgos I've learned is they don't like confrontation so in attempts to avoid that they will be, as P described, "polite."
*phew* man I don't know how you do this P-Angel. I'm just getting frustrated trying to explain this to her.
Bleh... I'm tired.
I'm just thinking of all the things you could say in response to my post and it's just going to be a regressive circle.
Do what you want, if you want to waste your time chasing him go do it. All I can say is that if it's meant to happen, it will happen. But it seems to me you're forcing this relationship to happen and it might very well happen but it just won't work out. I've seen this too many times, women forcing things to happen, forcing men to change, forcing him to be in a relationship and it always backfires on him.
I know you will say "I'm not forcing him to do anything" of course your not, but you're forcing it by manipulating the situation. And if you don't think you're manipulating it than look back at your post and read all of your pre-meditated steps. With the whole concert thing... You even said yourself you can manipulate your words so people feel and think a certain way.
Seriously P how do you do this—? I give up.
I've been through a similar situation with a Virgo before, except he approached me and trust me if he hadn't approached me there would have been no way our paths would have ever crossed.
But P is right, you are putting yourself forward as a little desperate. I mean come on you sent him an email in which you stated the observations you made of him, plus his personal trait. If I were him I would have thought it was creepy hence not respond back. I'm sure he knows by now that you are interested. You're just delusional right now and are making excuses for him.
I mean you said he was worth it, yet in another post you said you didn't know him at all. I'm sorry yes, you can observe someone, but one can not by no means compile the complexity of someones personality through observation alone.
If there is one thing about Virgos I've learned is they don't like confrontation so in attempts to avoid that they will be, as P described, "polite."
*phew* man I don't know how you do this P-Angel. I'm just getting frustrated trying to explain this to her.
Bleh... I'm tired.
I'm just thinking of all the things you could say in response to my post and it's just going to be a regressive circle.
Do what you want, if you want to waste your time chasing him go do it. All I can say is that if it's meant to happen, it will happen. But it seems to me you're forcing this relationship to happen and it might very well happen but it just won't work out. I've seen this too many times, women forcing things to happen, forcing men to change, forcing him to be in a relationship and it always backfires on him.
I know you will say "I'm not forcing him to do anything" of course your not, but you're forcing it by manipulating the situation. And if you don't think you're manipulating it than look back at your post and read all of your pre-meditated steps. With the whole concert thing... You even said yourself you can manipulate your words so people feel and think a certain way.
Seriously P how do you do this—? I give up.
lol, xtina, it takes a lot of my souls energy ... but, I care, so, it's worth it to me. Alot of meditation to recapture lost energy.
Unfortunately, this is the ways of the female Gemini. It is recognized that GemGal was like this .. however, it takes a long time for people to realize that this is a female Gem trait. It's really very disheartening to come to the full realization that a woman could lower herself to such a degree ... AND not even know it, even when told.
Gemmygem ...
"Following Friday's missed opportunity, I decided to keep it cool. So have not messaged him during the weekend. Since he was not online either (he normally is for like half an hour almost every night) I thought he was on vacation or had someone at home with him.
Sunday afternoon he finally showed up. I waited for a while then dropped a short "hi, whats up".
This is what you wrote at the beginning of this thread, when you were flushing out the details of your original train of thought, so I know it's exactly what you did ... and what you did was to wait and watch for a whole weekend, with bated breath, and conjuring up ways to zero in on him.
And then when it is pointed out to you, your flaw in this, in that it makes you look desperate to chase a man down .... you say the two of you barely know each other and you are just trying to get him to notice you .. which means = trying to tell you what we said jsut flew over your head because you actually believe that this chasing is the right thing to do, so there is no comprehension of how small and pathetic you make yourself in the viewing eyes of every other person except yourself.
Again ... you are reacting/responding according to your own self image of yourself, without any awareness that how other people are seeing you is entirely different. And this would include him.
What you have described here is your part in taking all advantages you can on what you consider an opportunity .... no loving feelings have been conveyed.
You are looking at him like he is an object, ((((( something ))))) you want, and in all this rambling on you've done, you haven't projected anything to leave an impression that there are sincere feelings present ......... just the avenues you've been taking to obtain a goal, in this case the object being a person.
Unfortunately, this is the ways of the female Gemini. It is recognized that GemGal was like this .. however, it takes a long time for people to realize that this is a female Gem trait. It's really very disheartening to come to the full realization that a woman could lower herself to such a degree ... AND not even know it, even when told.
Gemmygem ...
"Following Friday's missed opportunity, I decided to keep it cool. So have not messaged him during the weekend. Since he was not online either (he normally is for like half an hour almost every night) I thought he was on vacation or had someone at home with him.
Sunday afternoon he finally showed up. I waited for a while then dropped a short "hi, whats up".
This is what you wrote at the beginning of this thread, when you were flushing out the details of your original train of thought, so I know it's exactly what you did ... and what you did was to wait and watch for a whole weekend, with bated breath, and conjuring up ways to zero in on him.
And then when it is pointed out to you, your flaw in this, in that it makes you look desperate to chase a man down .... you say the two of you barely know each other and you are just trying to get him to notice you .. which means = trying to tell you what we said jsut flew over your head because you actually believe that this chasing is the right thing to do, so there is no comprehension of how small and pathetic you make yourself in the viewing eyes of every other person except yourself.
Again ... you are reacting/responding according to your own self image of yourself, without any awareness that how other people are seeing you is entirely different. And this would include him.
What you have described here is your part in taking all advantages you can on what you consider an opportunity .... no loving feelings have been conveyed.
You are looking at him like he is an object, ((((( something ))))) you want, and in all this rambling on you've done, you haven't projected anything to leave an impression that there are sincere feelings present ......... just the avenues you've been taking to obtain a goal, in this case the object being a person.
xtina,
First of all, thank you for your comments.
"I'm just thinking of all the things you could say in response to my post and it's just going to be a regressive circle."
No, I will not say anything 🙂 except that no matter how it looks from there, for me, every opinion counts. If I am not going to care what you say just because you don't approve me, then what I am doing here asking for advice— You are more than welcome... However, it is important how you voice your opinion. P Angel has been very negative, right from the start. And she thinks she's above everyone, therefore I am not going to be discouraged by what she says. I mean, come on, you can tell me "I THINK that he's just being polite" but you can't tell "A ha, he IS just being polite, he does not feel you." How do you know for sure? The two are very different and I do not have time listening to any "know-it-all"s crap. Sorry...
"I mean you said he was worth it, yet in another post you said you didn't know him at all."
He is worth to explore, to get to know, I meant. And yes, I know very little about him but I am learning new things everyday. So, yes, he is still worth the effort I say.
"I'm sorry yes, you can observe someone, but one can not by no means compile the complexity of someones personality through observation alone."
No, you can't. I agree with that. On the other hand, I did not give him a three pages detailed report on his personality. I just made a few comments based on my observations in the past 6-8 months. For instance he gets feisty when something (computer, phone, clock, etc.) does not work, so I said it. I said nice things too, for example I have heard him many times talking about his new apartment (he moved to a new place 2 mts ago), his furniture, his new paintings etc. He likes his home environment, and he spends quite a long time there. I told him that as well, " I think you are a home sweet home person" I said. This kind of stuff... No big deal.
So, thanks again, point taken: My acts may seem desperate, so I will try to cool it down a bit.
You say that you have dated a Virgo but I have not seen any posts from you on that. Can you give some details?
GG
First of all, thank you for your comments.
"I'm just thinking of all the things you could say in response to my post and it's just going to be a regressive circle."
No, I will not say anything 🙂 except that no matter how it looks from there, for me, every opinion counts. If I am not going to care what you say just because you don't approve me, then what I am doing here asking for advice— You are more than welcome... However, it is important how you voice your opinion. P Angel has been very negative, right from the start. And she thinks she's above everyone, therefore I am not going to be discouraged by what she says. I mean, come on, you can tell me "I THINK that he's just being polite" but you can't tell "A ha, he IS just being polite, he does not feel you." How do you know for sure? The two are very different and I do not have time listening to any "know-it-all"s crap. Sorry...
"I mean you said he was worth it, yet in another post you said you didn't know him at all."
He is worth to explore, to get to know, I meant. And yes, I know very little about him but I am learning new things everyday. So, yes, he is still worth the effort I say.
"I'm sorry yes, you can observe someone, but one can not by no means compile the complexity of someones personality through observation alone."
No, you can't. I agree with that. On the other hand, I did not give him a three pages detailed report on his personality. I just made a few comments based on my observations in the past 6-8 months. For instance he gets feisty when something (computer, phone, clock, etc.) does not work, so I said it. I said nice things too, for example I have heard him many times talking about his new apartment (he moved to a new place 2 mts ago), his furniture, his new paintings etc. He likes his home environment, and he spends quite a long time there. I told him that as well, " I think you are a home sweet home person" I said. This kind of stuff... No big deal.
So, thanks again, point taken: My acts may seem desperate, so I will try to cool it down a bit.
You say that you have dated a Virgo but I have not seen any posts from you on that. Can you give some details?
GG
P Angel,
And you keep doing it...
"You are looking at him like he is an object, ((((( something ))))) you want, and in all this rambling on you've done, you haven't projected anything to leave an impression that there are sincere feelings present ........."
I have just said that yesterday I told him he was a very nice man and I blushed when I said this. Anyone can tell lies but you can't fake a blush... he looked in my eyes, he saw that I liked him... as a person.
No. No. No. I do not see him as an object. All I want to gain at this point is more time with him, not himself. My prize would be knowing him closely, being his friend.
Anyway, thank you to you as well...
And you keep doing it...
"You are looking at him like he is an object, ((((( something ))))) you want, and in all this rambling on you've done, you haven't projected anything to leave an impression that there are sincere feelings present ........."
I have just said that yesterday I told him he was a very nice man and I blushed when I said this. Anyone can tell lies but you can't fake a blush... he looked in my eyes, he saw that I liked him... as a person.
No. No. No. I do not see him as an object. All I want to gain at this point is more time with him, not himself. My prize would be knowing him closely, being his friend.
Anyway, thank you to you as well...
Well From a virgo point of view I don't think he is that in to u I would just chill and let him cum to u. I'm on another astrology site and I see a whole bunch of gems with the same problems with virgo men and they are just like u. They won't give up seeing it being more than what it is u can look on here and see ur fellow gems and they have the same tone as u. I personally think u have more of a chance than the others but I would slow down. We will chase if u give us a chance and i'm seeing u are not doing this or he is not chasing u fast enough 4 u. Personally I think all of these gems are interested in virgo men bc it's such a challenge that we don't fall under ur spell like ever other guy in the zodiac does. That is bc we think talk is cheap and most gems are just talk no action. so if I was u I would chill out and wait 4 him and try to get him with action good luck.
virgoking,
Thanks so much. I was reading your post and got curious. Why do you think I have more chance than other Gemini gals? According to the majority, all I was doing so far was wrong -or, was exactly the same as what others have been doing-.
I have stopped all personal communications with him for now. I want to give him time to think, and I want him to be comfortable and feel safe with me. But I will be accessible, in case he wants to get in touch.
When he told me he could not come to the concert because he would be on vacation it crossed my mind that he might be using this just as an excuse. I've learned today from a coworker that he is really going out of town. So I realized once more that, Virgos are very honest, upfront people (the Virgo I dated 5 years back at grad school was this way), whenever you ask somethinbg direct, they give clear answers. And if they say something they mean it. No word-twisting. And when they say something they are not sure, it shows 🙂 This is one of the things that I appreciate the most in Virgos.
GG
Thanks so much. I was reading your post and got curious. Why do you think I have more chance than other Gemini gals? According to the majority, all I was doing so far was wrong -or, was exactly the same as what others have been doing-.
I have stopped all personal communications with him for now. I want to give him time to think, and I want him to be comfortable and feel safe with me. But I will be accessible, in case he wants to get in touch.
When he told me he could not come to the concert because he would be on vacation it crossed my mind that he might be using this just as an excuse. I've learned today from a coworker that he is really going out of town. So I realized once more that, Virgos are very honest, upfront people (the Virgo I dated 5 years back at grad school was this way), whenever you ask somethinbg direct, they give clear answers. And if they say something they mean it. No word-twisting. And when they say something they are not sure, it shows 🙂 This is one of the things that I appreciate the most in Virgos.
GG
"He will make his way around to you if he wants you."
Thanks Starfish225,
I hope so 🙂
Thanks Starfish225,
I hope so 🙂
well gemmygem it's seems u really like him and reading ur post u seem to be patients the other gems clearly give me the feel that they are only interested in there virgos 4 curiosity sake bc they are so use to men falling 4 there charm easily. And here cums a virgo not falling 4 there spell. 4 Some gems is there ego getting hurt, other are just curios and seeing u already dated a virgo u should know what to expect. But to me u feel genuine and I'm sure he can tell to.. just live by the virgo saying if it's meant to be it will be. U did enough now u just wait.
But to me u feel genuine and I'm sure he can tell to.. just live by the virgo saying if it's meant to be it will be. U did enough now u just wait.
I get this too, you've done enough for now. You need to stop contacting him and let him realize you're someone that he wants to have around. He seems to like you as a person as he comes to talk with you when he sees you but if he feels you are chasing him and he hasn't made up his mind where he wants you in his life then he may just take the high road and stop all communication. Point is Dont scare him off, he may start to feel like he is being stalked!
The other thing is I hope you are also open if he is not interested in you as anything more than a work collegue.
I get this too, you've done enough for now. You need to stop contacting him and let him realize you're someone that he wants to have around. He seems to like you as a person as he comes to talk with you when he sees you but if he feels you are chasing him and he hasn't made up his mind where he wants you in his life then he may just take the high road and stop all communication. Point is Dont scare him off, he may start to feel like he is being stalked!
The other thing is I hope you are also open if he is not interested in you as anything more than a work collegue.
Thanks virgoking and sweethearts. I am completely off the scene right now. I see him online but I do not say anything. I will probably see him this week, our project group is having a workshop on Thu so if he shows up it would be great. I want to kind of see him before his vacation and (I will not talk to him if he does not talk to me but I will definitely treat him very friendly and nice, and will smile to him everytime he looks towards me, and will try to find an excuse to ask him for a little help on something he could feel useful and will thank him with all my heart, so maybe I can make him think of me on his vacation (you know, people tend to think about themselves and their lives, problems, dreams, plans etc. when they're on vacation or travel). I really hope he comes!
My concern is all the energy your putting into this man especially when he's not reciprocating is creating distance not connection.
Aren't there any men that don't work with you that is attempting to capture your attention and date you? Your looks aren't the problem, it would be more about if you have a great attitude, I suggest join a paid dating service or find a matchmaker, be original in your pursuits, they have dinner for 8 were your surrounded by 4 men and 3 other women, I think it's called eight at eight dating club and you all get to know one another and you will find what you want or taking a dating cooking course were they pair you up with someone, this will not only build confidence you will also INCREASE your male magnetism which will draw other men into you...
men that hardly reciprocate interest and choose to not go out there way to build a connection aren't interested, yet all isn't lost if you KNOW how to create attraction in men that are slightly resistent, so you actually can build interest but the way your doing it is the hard way, there could many reasons why he's choosing to not have an office affair which I can't really blame him.
The easiest quickest way to find out if he's truly paying attention without you having to go to him is slightly do something different, nothing over the top, maybe comb your hair to the left instead of the right or add a hair ornament or pin a small flower on your jacket, wear a different kind of perfume or make up or if you don't wear make up add some lip stick and see if he says something, if none of that is not possible remove all your attention and shift your focus elsewhere, If he's truly interested he should notice and get hot in his pursuit to grab you. I find when a woman decides to move on that's when a man will take full notice and do something to recapture her attention...worth a try
all the time, energy and focus your giving him is a complete turn off, he won't budge...
Aren't there any men that don't work with you that is attempting to capture your attention and date you? Your looks aren't the problem, it would be more about if you have a great attitude, I suggest join a paid dating service or find a matchmaker, be original in your pursuits, they have dinner for 8 were your surrounded by 4 men and 3 other women, I think it's called eight at eight dating club and you all get to know one another and you will find what you want or taking a dating cooking course were they pair you up with someone, this will not only build confidence you will also INCREASE your male magnetism which will draw other men into you...
men that hardly reciprocate interest and choose to not go out there way to build a connection aren't interested, yet all isn't lost if you KNOW how to create attraction in men that are slightly resistent, so you actually can build interest but the way your doing it is the hard way, there could many reasons why he's choosing to not have an office affair which I can't really blame him.
The easiest quickest way to find out if he's truly paying attention without you having to go to him is slightly do something different, nothing over the top, maybe comb your hair to the left instead of the right or add a hair ornament or pin a small flower on your jacket, wear a different kind of perfume or make up or if you don't wear make up add some lip stick and see if he says something, if none of that is not possible remove all your attention and shift your focus elsewhere, If he's truly interested he should notice and get hot in his pursuit to grab you. I find when a woman decides to move on that's when a man will take full notice and do something to recapture her attention...worth a try
all the time, energy and focus your giving him is a complete turn off, he won't budge...
Posted by gemmygem
Thanks virgoking and sweethearts. I am completely off the scene right now. I see him online but I do not say anything. I will probably see him this week, our project group is having a workshop on Thu so if he shows up it would be great. I want to kind of see him before his vacation and (I will not talk to him if he does not talk to me but I will definitely treat him very friendly and nice, and will smile to him everytime he looks towards me, and will try to find an excuse to ask him for a little help on something he could feel useful and will thank him with all my heart, so maybe I can make him think of me on his vacation (you know, people tend to think about themselves and their lives, problems, dreams, plans etc. when they're on vacation or travel). I really hope he comes!
All of this I will not talk to him unless he talks to me is grade school talk, your an adult act like one, being nice to a man doesn't make a man like you more, you can be attractive and be nice and he will accept it but that won't inspire him to think about you or want anything with you, again it just seems your doing this the hard way, you need a male attraction 101 course, you simply seem not to know how attraction works for a man so your just making this so hard for yourself, it really is hard to read your post, I cringe because I know how much power you have as a woman but you don't use it! I hope he talks to me, think about me is the equivalent of begging as if your not worth having the best or having what you want, your so busy begging that what you want is passing you by, it says a lot about your social life and how you think of yourself. Why are you making this so hard gemmygem?
Hi tiki 33,
Actually I got an email today from him, saying he was really sorry for not calling me yet as he said last week. He said he was thinking of me but could not find the right time, so he wanted to just write and tell me that he will do it when things are less hectic and hopefully soon. And he again finishes with "Love". He looks pretty reciprocating to me?
Your post is long so I read it twice carefully and thank you for your advice. Unfortunately he's the only soul on earth that I am interested in right now 😢
I don't have a problem with my looks, I like myself as I am and as I said I am very confident on my attraction skills. However, I don't want to use them, at least not yet. And as I explained in my response to P Angel, I am not in a position to practice any womanhood now, as long as we are in a work environment. Besides, I want to look better only for my special guy, not to attract other men. This may be strange for some but I have always behaved that way, I wanted to be pretty only when I was dating someone. If there is no one at that time, I don't even dress up for a friends wedding hoping that I might meet someone there 🙂
Also, I don't want to play any games with him and you are giving me exactly this advice. Yes, I will not talk to him unless he talks first, because I don't want to bother him. But curling my hair one day just to get his attention, and when he notices and shows interest looking away and acting cold?? That's a game and I don't want to play it. I??ll treat him friendly because I dont't want to confuse him by suddenly stopping communications and not talking first. I think I should reassure him of my feelings in a non-threatening way. I said I want to make him think of me later, because I want to get in his head, before his heart. I will get there by my acts, honest, loving and consistent acts. That's a strategy, yes but not fake, I'll do all that genuinely, and I will enjoy it.
Paid dating service, singles nights, matchmakers, even blind dates... Not for me. I want to fall in love but I want it to come naturally, as it is now, otherwise I am better off by myself. I don't need anyone because I don't feel lonely. I have friends, family and even some guy friends that flirt with me all the time.
Sorry I sound like I defend myself a lot but I think about all posts and try to learn lessons from them.
This song comes from F. Valli to all G & V couples: Beggiiinn' put your loving hand out baby 🙂
Actually I got an email today from him, saying he was really sorry for not calling me yet as he said last week. He said he was thinking of me but could not find the right time, so he wanted to just write and tell me that he will do it when things are less hectic and hopefully soon. And he again finishes with "Love". He looks pretty reciprocating to me?
Your post is long so I read it twice carefully and thank you for your advice. Unfortunately he's the only soul on earth that I am interested in right now 😢
I don't have a problem with my looks, I like myself as I am and as I said I am very confident on my attraction skills. However, I don't want to use them, at least not yet. And as I explained in my response to P Angel, I am not in a position to practice any womanhood now, as long as we are in a work environment. Besides, I want to look better only for my special guy, not to attract other men. This may be strange for some but I have always behaved that way, I wanted to be pretty only when I was dating someone. If there is no one at that time, I don't even dress up for a friends wedding hoping that I might meet someone there 🙂
Also, I don't want to play any games with him and you are giving me exactly this advice. Yes, I will not talk to him unless he talks first, because I don't want to bother him. But curling my hair one day just to get his attention, and when he notices and shows interest looking away and acting cold?? That's a game and I don't want to play it. I??ll treat him friendly because I dont't want to confuse him by suddenly stopping communications and not talking first. I think I should reassure him of my feelings in a non-threatening way. I said I want to make him think of me later, because I want to get in his head, before his heart. I will get there by my acts, honest, loving and consistent acts. That's a strategy, yes but not fake, I'll do all that genuinely, and I will enjoy it.
Paid dating service, singles nights, matchmakers, even blind dates... Not for me. I want to fall in love but I want it to come naturally, as it is now, otherwise I am better off by myself. I don't need anyone because I don't feel lonely. I have friends, family and even some guy friends that flirt with me all the time.
Sorry I sound like I defend myself a lot but I think about all posts and try to learn lessons from them.
This song comes from F. Valli to all G & V couples: Beggiiinn' put your loving hand out baby 🙂
gemmy in no way did I tell you to play games and I definitely don't tell women to act cold, I see there is a language barrier or maybe it's a lack of understanding for the both of us...you seem pretty edgy and off balance but if your okay then I see nothing wrong with any of it especially if it's bring you what you want...in my opinion your the one playing games yet you label it as genuine hmmmm that's interesting, I don't actually see genuine but maybe there is a difference in culture....to each her own d:
good luck
good luck
Maybe it's because I'm a Scorp and I like my privacy but if someone I barely knew (only catted with a few times) emailed me an "observation" of my personality I'd freak the hell out. That would make me feel so creeped out and violated beyond belief. Sorry but that's stalker shit right there. Especially the stuff about his home and knowing when he moved?!?! *shudder* But I'm super private so...... *shrug*
I mean you know his favorite type of music and what times he is online and for how long? Umm... that's just strange unless he's personally told you these things in an intimate type converstaion. There is nothing wrong with be observant but to confront a person with "I know what you do/like hahaha" is straight up creepy. I'd run .......RUN away. At least make it appear to be a lucky guess!
"I bet you like Jazz"
"Wow, how did you know?
"Lucky guess 😉"
It seems to me you think you are closer with him then you actually are. You seem to be over stepping personal boundries by miles. And the others are right is smells of desperation. That is not attractive at all.
I mean you know his favorite type of music and what times he is online and for how long? Umm... that's just strange unless he's personally told you these things in an intimate type converstaion. There is nothing wrong with be observant but to confront a person with "I know what you do/like hahaha" is straight up creepy. I'd run .......RUN away. At least make it appear to be a lucky guess!
"I bet you like Jazz"
"Wow, how did you know?
"Lucky guess 😉"
It seems to me you think you are closer with him then you actually are. You seem to be over stepping personal boundries by miles. And the others are right is smells of desperation. That is not attractive at all.
*only chatted*
catted sheesh! That sounds bad!
catted sheesh! That sounds bad!
Oh Gingerscorp, I think you've only scanned my posts because you seem like missing a few details:
I've known this guy for like 10 months through work so we don't just barely know each other. We work in the same project group and in the beginning we were meeting like every other week but I did not have any feelings or thoughts about him then. He was just a nice and friendly guy. Then, right after new year I met him at a party by coincidence and we had a long conversation that started everything. Before we were only talking business, but there we exchanged phone numbers and started texting every now and then for small stuff. His move and other things about his apartment, he told me himself at different times. I just put together pieces and told him what I see, also it makes a big difference how you say things and I certainly did not say it in a creepy way. It was more like... humorous and I assume he liked it, because he mentioned it in our short conversation later in a positive and curious way. Another thing is, I have looked up for him on Google once but I only checked public information, not anything beyond that. (He also checked my online profile a couple of times, I found out but it did not freak me out, because that's normal, people can get curious and search engines are free). I said that we've been also communicating online for more than a month, and I know when he's there because I figured out that he's pretty consistent, I mean if he comes online, he comes always around the same time, so I can guess when he'll be there. But I certainly did not stalk him or sit in front of the computer all day and wait for him to go online and catch him. As I said for the past few days I see him but I do not talk to him most of the time.
Leave everything aside, he contacted me yesterday and told me that he was thinking of me and will call me when he's available. I am not saying "Yes! that's it, I got him" but this is a very good sign that he's okay with me so far. Anyway, I will not force anything to happen but I will not be shy either 🙂
P.S.: There may be misunderstandings on my part when I comment on your post and others, because like u said I am not a native English speaker, so apologize in advance.
GG
I've known this guy for like 10 months through work so we don't just barely know each other. We work in the same project group and in the beginning we were meeting like every other week but I did not have any feelings or thoughts about him then. He was just a nice and friendly guy. Then, right after new year I met him at a party by coincidence and we had a long conversation that started everything. Before we were only talking business, but there we exchanged phone numbers and started texting every now and then for small stuff. His move and other things about his apartment, he told me himself at different times. I just put together pieces and told him what I see, also it makes a big difference how you say things and I certainly did not say it in a creepy way. It was more like... humorous and I assume he liked it, because he mentioned it in our short conversation later in a positive and curious way. Another thing is, I have looked up for him on Google once but I only checked public information, not anything beyond that. (He also checked my online profile a couple of times, I found out but it did not freak me out, because that's normal, people can get curious and search engines are free). I said that we've been also communicating online for more than a month, and I know when he's there because I figured out that he's pretty consistent, I mean if he comes online, he comes always around the same time, so I can guess when he'll be there. But I certainly did not stalk him or sit in front of the computer all day and wait for him to go online and catch him. As I said for the past few days I see him but I do not talk to him most of the time.
Leave everything aside, he contacted me yesterday and told me that he was thinking of me and will call me when he's available. I am not saying "Yes! that's it, I got him" but this is a very good sign that he's okay with me so far. Anyway, I will not force anything to happen but I will not be shy either 🙂
P.S.: There may be misunderstandings on my part when I comment on your post and others, because like u said I am not a native English speaker, so apologize in advance.
GG
Oh Well.... Like I said I have issues with privacy and I would not like for someone to "guess" or observe me. That's me though. A private Scorp 😛
I'd lay off and let him come to you. No google, no observations, no one sided chats on the internet. Let HIM do the chasing.
I'd lay off and let him come to you. No google, no observations, no one sided chats on the internet. Let HIM do the chasing.
Actually, I find this to be a Gemini woman trait and can see it in all GemFems .... there is a certain idea in mind, a desire to want (something), in this case, a someone ... and anything beyond this (something) isn't even considered.
GemGal was nortorius for being oblivious to anything anybody said to her that didn't coincide with what she had in her head.
::: sighs :::
GemGal was nortorius for being oblivious to anything anybody said to her that didn't coincide with what she had in her head.
::: sighs :::
Posted by P-Angel
Actually, I find this to be a Gemini woman trait and can see it in all GemFems .... there is a certain idea in mind, a desire to want (something), in this case, a someone ... and anything beyond this (something) isn't even considered.
GemGal was nortorius for being oblivious to anything anybody said to her that didn't coincide with what she had in her head.
::: sighs :::
Shakes head...I'm glad someone can explain this insanity...Thanks P
Posted by P-Angel
Actually, I find this to be a Gemini woman trait and can see it in all GemFems .... there is a certain idea in mind, a desire to want (something), in this case, a someone ... and anything beyond this (something) isn't even considered. GemGal was nortorius for being oblivious to anything anybody said to her that didn't coincide with what she had in her head. ::: sighs :::
i thought i was the only one thinking that lol. it seems like gems have a hard time believing that sum one does not like them. or they can change the persons mind set. and i believe these guys are hurting there ego by not falling for them.
Nobody is perfect, neither you. Gems (at least myself and the ones that I've known) are at least comfortable with who they are. We know our flaws better than anyone, so even if it's insanity for you, to me, my love or the way I love him is still the best feeling in the world.
Posted by gemmygem
Nobody is perfect, neither you. Gems (at least myself and the ones that I've known) are at least comfortable with who they are. We know our flaws better than anyone, so even if it's insanity for you, to me, my love or the way I love him is still the best feeling in the world.
yet apparently he's not loving you back, it's like your living in this make believe situation were he's just being polite and your in love, I mean this is his job, he can't risk his job by telling you to get lost, sorry not interested especially since he's seen a bit of your obsessing over him, which could make one think if I reject her full out maybe she will flip out and make my work experience a negative environment which could bring all kinds of complications, seems he's attempting to keep peace...i'm sure he feels awkward over this, I know I would if a guy at my work liked me in this way and I did nothing to provoke any of it.
to give one your heart before you even know him is begging for heartbreak and disappointment....it's ass backwards behavior
I would have completely agreed with you tiki if he had not contacted me after I stopped. He might have done this just to keep the peace, however he did not come to the project meeting this morning but his boss and one colleague was there, and they mentioned that "he was buried to work lately".
That indicates:
1. He is really very busy, and that's the reason that I don't get to see him/ hear from him, not because he's hiding from me.
2. He's thinking of me even when he's buried to work and try to make time to keep contact just to make sure I do not get the wrong message.
Now, these are the facts on one side... and on the other is you, telling me that I'm daydreaming solely based on your past observations with other Gemini women and their stories. I mean, I may be seeing the half of the glass full, but looking at this picture, I don't see myself that insane...
That indicates:
1. He is really very busy, and that's the reason that I don't get to see him/ hear from him, not because he's hiding from me.
2. He's thinking of me even when he's buried to work and try to make time to keep contact just to make sure I do not get the wrong message.
Now, these are the facts on one side... and on the other is you, telling me that I'm daydreaming solely based on your past observations with other Gemini women and their stories. I mean, I may be seeing the half of the glass full, but looking at this picture, I don't see myself that insane...
I have no past observations with gemini women, I'm an air sign as well and I know we can be slap silly over men that don't want us, we put men in awkward positions to semi-reject us, they like us liking them but they don't wanna give back, they string us along but have no intentions of giving back, not all air signs behave this way but it's something about female air signs, we always want we can't have and we love chasing men that don't want to be caught. Your behavior is insane, YOUR NOT insane, the behavior is insanity. Men that are interested in you MAKE TIME, they make time for women they like, they stick around, they chat and talk and seek you out and date you, they want to get to know you, find out who you are, if he's not making time then he's not interested yet for some insane reason you think if you stick around and wait and hope and wish that he will suddenly make time. Your not doing anything but making yourself seem desperate for him, how you think that's going to make him feel good about you I have no idea, your inviting mistreatment and rejection, your inviting a man to use you and take advantage of your goodness.
2. He's thinking of me even when he's buried to work and try to make time to keep contact just to make sure I do not get the wrong message.
::::: sighs :::::
Right, the wrong messege of ... I better contact her, so she doesn't think I'm so into her that it's scarring me and so I have to hide because I'm not.
::::: sighs :::::
Right, the wrong messege of ... I better contact her, so she doesn't think I'm so into her that it's scarring me and so I have to hide because I'm not.
Your not a pitiful person, I'm sure your not but you just have this pitiful desperate vibe and I know if we can sense it I'm sure he does as well and it seems he just gives you these pity responses (again not wanting to ignore you completely ie hurt you or be confronted) it all feels forced to me, I wish men like him would just be honest and tell the truth so women like you can let go because when the feelings are so strong and one sided everything gets misunderstood and misinterpreted and then he's the bad guy for not being upfront day one...
I've no clue why women chase men, tiki ... seriously .. why?
I mean, let's think about this ... a woman wants more than anything in this world to feel special by a man who adores her, wants her, a man to whom cherishes her. This is what we want, for a man to express his love for us in this fashion so we can feel so secure in our womanhood ..... he loves me !!!!
But, if you take a situation in which a man is NOT showing any of that, there is no expressions made to the woman to make her feel those things ..... so she chases him down to get these non-expressions?
Does the woman actually believe in her head that her efforts of trying to convince a person through attention diligence ... that this is going to create attraction vibes?
Seriously .... wtf ... I don't get it.
I mean, let's think about this ... a woman wants more than anything in this world to feel special by a man who adores her, wants her, a man to whom cherishes her. This is what we want, for a man to express his love for us in this fashion so we can feel so secure in our womanhood ..... he loves me !!!!
But, if you take a situation in which a man is NOT showing any of that, there is no expressions made to the woman to make her feel those things ..... so she chases him down to get these non-expressions?
Does the woman actually believe in her head that her efforts of trying to convince a person through attention diligence ... that this is going to create attraction vibes?
Seriously .... wtf ... I don't get it.
Second thought .. maybe he is hiding from you.
Because I just went back to re-read all of this .... and you follow his every move very closely, and if I were him, and knowing that you follow me ... I would probably get worried.
It's really obssessive .. please stop it.
Because I just went back to re-read all of this .... and you follow his every move very closely, and if I were him, and knowing that you follow me ... I would probably get worried.
It's really obssessive .. please stop it.
I dunno P, I seriously don't get it either....most women walk away bruised from behaving this way, when your young with no care in the world it's fun but after a certain age it's counter productive and it's dinging her self esteem everytime she chases a man and get's rejected, not only is she not feeling cherished, loved, adored she also begins to question her womanhood, question her reality of being able to do a real relationship with men, it kills her confidence in herself because she's creating a toxic relationship cycle not only with herself but with bad men which usually ends on bad terms.
The women that chase men never think how it effects every part of her life, she's suddenly a woman that men run from and not chase and that has to suck.
Assclown city, that is all she's going to attract are ambivalent men that play head games and send mixed messages.
There are 3.3 billion men on this planet, can you imagine how big a man's ego is if she's only waiting, wishing, hoping on him LOL
The women that chase men never think how it effects every part of her life, she's suddenly a woman that men run from and not chase and that has to suck.
Assclown city, that is all she's going to attract are ambivalent men that play head games and send mixed messages.
There are 3.3 billion men on this planet, can you imagine how big a man's ego is if she's only waiting, wishing, hoping on him LOL
Ladies you will not believe me but I have just spoken with him online.
He came in and said "Hi" to me! 🙂
I asked how he was and he listed everything he has done today so far 🙂
He said he's preparing a report but he could type in at the same time and kept talking 🙂
Then he sent me some links where I could see the details of his last project. He was very proud of it and asked me if I liked it or not 🙂
I said I liked it very much and that I was impressed the way he handles many tasks/ projects at a time. He seemed very happy and gave me more details on his days at work and how he's also managing other stuff (I think he was showing off a bit, because he was saying things like "oh, this is piece of cake. It takes only 10% of my time. But I also do that and this and that". 🙂
Then he asked me a few personal questions 🙂
He also asked me how was my day and seemed interested in what I did. 🙂
We exchanged a few jokes 🙂
Then I said I had to go and went offline first. When I said bye, he thanked me for this lovely chat and also for my time 🙂
We spoke for like half an hour and overall it was a very nice and easygoing conversation and I felt like he was more interested in me than before and was more willing to keep it going.
Another important thing is: He can always hide his online status from me, I mean he can be invisible only to me if he wants, but he never did it.
I think it is happening, I mean he has started to accept me/ see me as a friend which is the only thing I want at this point.
He came in and said "Hi" to me! 🙂
I asked how he was and he listed everything he has done today so far 🙂
He said he's preparing a report but he could type in at the same time and kept talking 🙂
Then he sent me some links where I could see the details of his last project. He was very proud of it and asked me if I liked it or not 🙂
I said I liked it very much and that I was impressed the way he handles many tasks/ projects at a time. He seemed very happy and gave me more details on his days at work and how he's also managing other stuff (I think he was showing off a bit, because he was saying things like "oh, this is piece of cake. It takes only 10% of my time. But I also do that and this and that". 🙂
Then he asked me a few personal questions 🙂
He also asked me how was my day and seemed interested in what I did. 🙂
We exchanged a few jokes 🙂
Then I said I had to go and went offline first. When I said bye, he thanked me for this lovely chat and also for my time 🙂
We spoke for like half an hour and overall it was a very nice and easygoing conversation and I felt like he was more interested in me than before and was more willing to keep it going.
Another important thing is: He can always hide his online status from me, I mean he can be invisible only to me if he wants, but he never did it.
I think it is happening, I mean he has started to accept me/ see me as a friend which is the only thing I want at this point.
I don't believe you...
Niether do I ... awefully coincidental that once we say the things in which we have, that suddenly he is reciprocating.
He couldn't even make a meeting he was so busy ... now suddenly, he can handle a distraction? If that were the case, he would have made the meeting.
In your attempt to convince us that your behaviour isn't loony .... you add more craziness to the story. 😢 .. wtf?
Seriously .... step away from the edge, don't jump, just step away from the edge and we can talk about it.
He couldn't even make a meeting he was so busy ... now suddenly, he can handle a distraction? If that were the case, he would have made the meeting.
In your attempt to convince us that your behaviour isn't loony .... you add more craziness to the story. 😢 .. wtf?
Seriously .... step away from the edge, don't jump, just step away from the edge and we can talk about it.
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Following Friday's missed opportunity, I decided to keep it cool. So have not messaged him during the weekend. Since he was not online either (he normally is for like half an hour almost every night) I thought he was on vacation or had someone at home with him.
Sunday afternoon he finally showed up. I waited for a while then dropped a short "hi, whats up". He said his parents are visiting him so he's been with them all weekend. Then we started talking and I mentioned that I was going to cook but had a problem with the recipe. Being a generous Virgo, he offered help to straighten up my recipe in a humorous way. Then he said he needed to fix something at home and went offline. During the chat I was very politely showed some interest in his family and I think I've got good points for this because he sounded like he was glad. (And we did not talk about the Friday event, he did not ask if I went or not so I did not say anything).
Yesterday night I cooked using his tips and the result was not bad at all. I thought maybe I should keep some for him. So I packed a portion and had it delivered to his office in the morning with a very nice but brief thank you note.
I waited the whole day for his response but he did not call or text. I tried not to get disappointed. Then, just a few minutes ago, I went online an he came afterwards. But instead of IMing me, he sent a message by email just saying "got the package, thank you very much, it was very thoughtful of you, see you soon". He also adds a smile at the end and says "by the way it was good". I replied to his email shortly 10 mins later and told him that I was glad he got it and enjoyed.
My questions:
Do you see his way of response (also the content) as positive?
Why he did not use chat to thank me instead of e-mail?
What should be my next move? (I think even if by now he did not have any idea, he knows today I am definitely interested. I think he likes my attention too, in a way, but he plays very cool, he does not show any signs of being impressed, he is rather nonchalant).
I might see him within next week at another meeting. Maybe I should pull off a bit till then and when I see him I should just ask a few follow up questions, something about his parents for instance...