Why are virgos so hard to read-he puts me on edge

Dearest virgo men or any who have any insight into the virgo's brain. Is it just my own insecurity or what? i spent the whole day of sex, cuddling, kissing, sleeping with virgo man. It came to the point where i felt like he wanted me to leave--it was something i felt cuz he was supposed to go to a party with some of his friends but because i didn't want to be seen by his family he decided to stay and wait with me until his friends left him. Then afterwards i felt like he was getting antsy but he was not saying anything. i just said i'll go then cuz i felt uncomfortable cuz i felt he was giving off a vibe and he denied it. Then eventually we left and we sat in my driveway chitchatting--only because i didnt get out of the car but it was obvious he wanted to leave. i knew his mind had turned to work 😢 this guy is so hard to read because i'm thinking that we've made love because we still love each other regardless of the circumstances--but then he when i had gotten to his house before we even made love he mentioned that we should have a talk about "us" and what it means now that we're being involved and intimate again. Yikes that is scary--i am scared because i just want to take things easily and light between us but if i say that i don't want him to think that i don't want something serious and treat me just like a fwb. Virgo men any advice? What do i say to him when we have this "talk"?

What is your sign again Sweetie?

I'm a gemini

actually to be exact a taurus-gem cusp

Hmm... based on my experiences, I find Gemini women give into Virgo men easily, some even become obsessive.

The Virgo man tries to fix the Gemini, who goes along and no longer provides a "challenge" for him. Often the Virgo becomes bored... sadly.

As for your situation, his switch to "work mode" is quite normal and natural.

If he wants to talk about "us" this is definitely a good sign. However, you should make your stance clear and express your feelings rationally.
Continuing to give into his "carnal desires" without emotional backing, is a recipe for disaster.

I have read that virgo men show their affection through physical intimacy though as a man I'm quite sure that he wouldn't say no to the sex. In the past when we were in a relationship however there would be times when i would want sex and he would not giveme --for lack of a better term.

Though Cajun, as for being bored i often wonder about it but in my case i tend to be very closed with him--i try to fix this by being more open but majority of the time i am closed. Also, when i was in a relationship with him i find that i would be very uneasy and unsettled with him because as a virgo he is detached in his persona but he is also bipolar and I am extremely sensitive to emotions--so i pick up on things alot which adds to my already nervous gem personality. i get the feeling that he holds himself back alot and it confuses me because i think this means he doesnt care --if you love someone shouldn't you want to share your innermost feelings with them?

Well now i have no idea what to do because as for the carnal desires i'm feeling a bit guilty that i gave in to them esp since i don't know where we stand. He said he loves me etc and he shows that he does in his actions but somehow i feel unsettled.

Also, i may go away for a year in july and i told him about this. His reaction was to tense up and then he was like "that's great, you'll have fun and meet lots of guys" So i said what makes you think i'm interested in meeting other men and he's all like well it's part of the experience of going to another country, it will happen. it makes it seem like he's pushing me unto other men--does it mean he doesn't care? I was all excited and he just seemed very disinterested in me going.

i wanna know if this means that he doesnt want me to go because he's scared of losing me and also if now this means that he will find it impractical to be in a relationship with me since i may be leaving?

oh and what is it about virgo men when they say stuff like "u're missed" instead of "i miss you" and when i let him know i wanted to see him yesterday and it seemed like it couldnt work he's all like "i thought you wanted to see me" instead of "but i want to see you"

Posted by Lissanth

Though Cajun, as for being bored i often wonder about it but in my case i tend to be very closed with him--i try to fix this by being more open but majority of the time i am closed. Also, when i was in a relationship with him i find that i would be very uneasy and unsettled with him because as a virgo he is detached in his persona but he is also bipolar and I am extremely sensitive to emotions--so i pick up on things alot which adds to my already nervous gem personality. i get the feeling that he holds himself back alot and it confuses me because i think this means he doesnt care --if you love someone shouldn't you want to share your innermost feelings with them?

You are open yet uneasy?
How does that work?

How is he Bipolar?

Well now i have no idea what to do because as for the carnal desires i'm feeling a bit guilty that i gave in to them esp since i don't know where we stand. He said he loves me etc and he shows that he does in his actions but somehow i feel unsettled.

Your lack of conviction is understandable and my advice is to establish where you both stand, before you engage in intimacy again.

Also, i may go away for a year in july and i told him about this. His reaction was to tense up and then he was like "that's great, you'll have fun and meet lots of guys" So i said what makes you think i'm interested in meeting other men and he's all like well it's part of the experience of going to another country, it will happen. it makes it seem like he's pushing me unto other men--does it mean he doesn't care? I was all excited and he just seemed very disinterested in me going.

Oooh boy... this sounds like me with one of my Scorpio exes.

You have an effect on him, he cares about you, he loves you, he will not refuse intimacy with you... but he probably can not see a future with you...

Trouble...

i wanna know if this means that he doesnt want me to go because he's scared of losing me and also if now this means that he will find it impractical to be in a relationship with me since i may be leaving?

click to expand

Quite the contrary, he wants you to find someone new, so you can move on from him and he can give up his emotions for you more easily.

oh and what is it about virgo men when they say stuff like "u're missed" instead of "i miss you" and when i let him know i wanted to see him yesterday and it seemed like it couldnt work he's all like "i thought you wanted to see me" instead of "but i want to see you"

He's manipulating your mind, trying to have the upper hand 😛

hmm..well he was diagnosed with bipolarity and though i try to be open i am still closed with him.

As for seeing a future with him---what makes you think that? And if he indeed does not see a future with me how would he know? He makes comments like "are you going to invite me to your wedding" and makes comments about "my husband" and then he says stuff about us having children blah blah but then i get a little uneasy and school my expression. Then he seems to retreat.

He said that it is his insecurity to think about me finding another man--so why do you think that he does in fact want me to move on?

Posted by Cajunspirit
Continuing to give into his "carnal desires" without emotional backing, is a recipe for disaster.

Caje, when's your book coming out? LOL! Good stuff!

Posted by **StringsAttached**
Caje, when's your book coming out? LOL! Good stuff!

As soon as I get a Virgette who loves me to death and will critique it for me lol

Posted by Lissanth

As for seeing a future with him---what makes you think that? And if he indeed does not see a future with me how would he know? He makes comments like "are you going to invite me to your wedding" and makes comments about "my husband" and then he says stuff about us having children blah blah but then i get a little uneasy and school my expression. Then he seems to retreat.

Haha, he really is reminding me of myself.
Used to have lots of fun seeing the reactions these kinds of statements got out of my exes.

Having fun.

But the suggesting you find new guys thing, I only do that when I want a girl to FORGET me and move on.
We never really think we are good enough for anyone...

Posted by Ccdarling
Very true never change for a Virgo, he doesn't really want this. Be true to your chaotic nature as a Gemini. This he will find a challenge in because he can never ever fix you. It will drive him crazy. Be indecisive as heck just be yourself you should never change who you are for someone else. I hate to say but make him sort of your slave lover, they love this although they won't admit it.

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....

Ummm yeah, that sounds like a nightmare.
Maybe First and Third Decans like that lol

Hey liss how have you been it sounds like he still cares for you but not sure if you feel the same.. he was just in work mode it was nothing against you we do that sometimes its normal.. your ok, your just being a gem and thinking to much lol

Posted by Cajunspirit

Posted by **StringsAttached**
Caje, when's your book coming out? LOL! Good stuff!

As soon as I get a Virgette who loves me to death and will critique it for me lol

click to expand

Well, I likes ya a lot and I'll critique ANYTHING, lol! Of course, you know that already, since I'm a Virgo. 😉

Hi Virgoking, i am good. How are you? You haven't been posting much on the other site :p

Cajun. why would you tease your gfs like that? Oh yeah and what's up with the manipulating of minds that virgos do huh?

Posted by **StringsAttached**
Well, I likes ya a lot and I'll critique ANYTHING, lol! Of course, you know that already, since I'm a Virgo. 😉

Oooo baby, time to whip out the red pen!
This little boy needs some correcting 😉

LOL

Posted by Lissanth

Cajun. why would you tease your gfs like that? Oh yeah and what's up with the manipulating of minds that virgos do huh?

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It's... fun.
It is also a test, but mostly fun 😄

i have been doing good beautiful liss 😉 i don't post that much on sass.. all they talk about is scorpio this and scorpio that... i read the articles about charts bc people over there are good with charts... you should check out my post about why virgos are different on this site.. i have a link that break each virgo down by the day they were born its true for me lol..

Hi Vk, i can't access the info in the link--do i have to buy it?

Posted by Lissanth
Hi Vk, i can't access the info in the link--do i have to buy it?

no liss it should show u pages from the book.. its not showing you nothing wats his bday

his bday is aug 31 and mine is may 24. I tried clicking on the book but i cant see the pages...

Hi Ccdarling, thanks for your advice--so ure a gem?? I don't believe in playing games --i have been there done that and it has always backfired on me not mention given me no satisfaction in the end. I've only driven myself crazy because I have found that virgo men don't "take the bait"--so i dont get the reaction i want---the end result is pure frustration and heartache plus i dont want a relationship built on games. Also i dont believe in "catching a man". He should want to be with me for himself.

Oh and virgos --when you ask a virgo man for help and he says "oh i don't really know much about that stuff, but yeah--i hope i don't distract you" what does that mean??

If you like somebody, then show them you like them. IF you don't like somebody and want to keep them on edge, then play games with them to keep them guessing. That is what he's doing to you. He's not serious about you. If he is, he will be upfront with you and not keep you on edge. Trust me, I know this now..... it's fun to play the game at first, but it grows tiresome when you see that the game is a fisade to cover other aspects of one's life. That's not a sign thing, that's a people thing.

Posted by Lissanth
Oh and virgos --when you ask a virgo man for help and he says "oh i don't really know much about that stuff, but yeah--i hope i don't distract you" what does that mean??

It means that he doesn't want to get entangled with your situation or your problems. The Virgo that I was seeing would always be up for being the problem solver in my life. He always was that stable ground for me..... until he became the problem and doesn't know how to fix it because it requires fixing himself.

I felt that way--him not wanting to become entagled--surprisingly it hurts very much. I did not respond and he hasn't called or texted me since. Is his aloof and distanced behaviour a punishment because i hurt him by breaking up with him and not speaking to him over a month or has he gotten used to not communicating with me on a daily basis?

Posted by Lissanth
I felt that way--him not wanting to become entagled--surprisingly it hurts very much. I did not respond and he hasn't called or texted me since. Is his aloof and distanced behaviour a punishment because i hurt him by breaking up with him and not speaking to him over a month or has he gotten used to not communicating with me on a daily basis?

Not only is he a virgo, but he's a male. They are creatures of habit, so if it was like that in the beginning where communication could of been strained, then the likelihood of having communication at the end is going to be the same.

I learned that with my Virgo..... we had a close bond, but our communication skills sucked. Plus I felt like I couldn't express how I felt, but I did it anyways, because supressing is regressing. Moreover, I'm an Aries, and when I got something to say, it needs to be said, coz the last thing that should happen is that I play shit out in my head.

When I found out what was going on behond my back, I knew why he was being so secreative. I knew before hand, in my gut, but I waited for the moment of opportunity to grant me the serenity. I have bowed out gracefully, told him how I feel about the situation, expressed my dissappointment in him as someone who was so close to me, and bowed out.

I have yet to talk to him, and doubt I ever will. Some things are better left unsaid, after all...... I've wiped my hands clean of that mess, and I'm happier now that I don't have to worry about him. And that's where you need to get with this virgo..... you need that clean cut, express yourself out so that you can stop worrying about him, what he's thinking, if he's thinking about you, blah, blah, blah.....

You're a woman.,.... he should be coming to YOU!!!! All these females chasing their men!!!! I could care less if my virgo is thinking about me. He fucked up, mistreated me, and betrayed my trust. 3 no-no's in my book, and they were consecutive no-no's. Men are to court women...... if a man doesn't want you, than a man doesn't want you. Getting all hooked up and emotionally bent because he isn't paying attention is weak sauce. It's a manipulation tool, and it's effective. GIVE HIM THE SILENT TREATMENT!!!! IT WILL DRIVE HIM UP THE WALLS AND WILL PUT THE POWER IN YOUR HANDS!!!

Thanks M.I.A., I needed to hear that! I haven't texted Virgo in a week and a half and he hasn't tried to contact me. I know he has a lot going on by his bands posts and play dates but that is no excuse for no time for at least a hello or something. I may just let this one go. 😢 (It does hurt though) I am worth more than that for sure!
I have other men that want to talk to me so I may just have to let Virgo go his own way even though we seemed to get on so well and the sex was absolutely fabulous! "wink wink" There are other fish in the sea! "wink wink"

I really need to remember the preview button...there shouldn't have been two winks...lol. Oops!