Aquas and death

I am curious to what you need most from a significant other when someone close to you passes away. My boyfriend's father passed away and although I have an instinct to what to do, I'd like to get an aquarius point of view. I told him that some people need to talk about it and some don't like to and whatever he needs I am here for him. He said he doesn't know what he will need since hes never been through this before. Understable. Suppose I'll let him take the lead and play it by ear.

Thanks for your thoughts and advice.

I've been to many funerals it hurt because the one I tried to save began to slip through my fingers like the ones around her. I didn't cry but everyday after for the past 3 years I've cried enough tears for everyone who showed in attendance. I never let anyone see me that weak although I hold it in it still hurts.

I think Aquarius has the mental acuity to handle death better than most BUT the emotions to death are probably more overwhelming then one would like to admit.

My Aqua grandmother died only a few years ago and that was pretty harsh. But, i've never had a parent die so I couldn't really say....

sorry for your loss ??_..I think the best thing you can do is to draw his grief out as he may bottle it up??_??_My brother died in 2010 and I was living with my ex and I was in shock at the time and my ex gave me a hug and I started to sob on his shoulder and he was like "ok thats enough" and I was thinking "you fucking cunt"! at the time because since that happened I wasn't able to cry properly over it until we buried his ashes in 2012??_.and the whole time I didn't cry I was beating myself up[ inside because I felt like I didn't care about him enough to cry but the fact was that I still felt he was still alive and didn't accept his death??_.so in conclusion really grab him by the arms shake him and tell him his father is dead he's not coming back and think about all the good times u shared??_..one thing I found myself doing was writing out really long msgs to my brother on Facebook I would tell him how much I missed him and just talk about things in my day and eventually I would just be bawling my eyes out once I realised I'm just typing to no one

what about you, truecap? how do you handle death?

Everyone believes that so and so and so under a sun sign is not gonna feel anything, well who doesn't feel a damn thing when a loved one is gone?? you think that it's easy and people can easily move on??
doesn't matter if an aqua has pisces in his/her chart. They're heartless human beings if they don't cry and feel shit about someone who is supposedly part of their lives. Maybe, huh, just maybe some of these folks are cold blooded people who could probably be serial killers!! Like that Green River killer who is an Aquarius sun cusp and had water in his chart too!

sigh i just get so riled up and irked when i read these things. I hate death, who likes it huh? who wants their loved ones gone??
no one.

Yeah I'd say leave him be for now. I've never been a person to seek comfort personally but like 11th if you see me plain as day looking like shit a hug might just set off a pretty emotional outburst. I loathe sharing what's going in my head when I'm still processing it and rather be left alone until either I'm done or I start talking about it myself.

So it's more like... leave me alone, unless you are able to revive the dead so I could speak to them one last time myself otherwise just let me process it until it's out of my system. I do lash out aggressively, that's how violent some of the emotions and thoughts are and definitely the reason I'd rather not talk about it.

It'll depend on how he was with his dad though. It's always worse when there's some underlying guilt or an aspect of that father-son relationship that needs closure. When my grandma passed I had a sulk for a bit but I'm grateful she went peacefully.

We celebrate death cuz it symbolizes progress. The person has moved onto bigger and things, so we bless them and wish them peace on their journey without our company.

Thanks everyone for your input. I know its a hard thing to deal with. Appreciate the insight.

Posted by lisabethur8
what about you, truecap? how do you handle death?

Everyone believes that so and so and so under a sun sign is not gonna feel anything, well who doesn't feel a damn thing when a loved one is gone?? you think that it's easy and people can easily move on??
doesn't matter if an aqua has pisces in his/her chart. They're heartless human beings if they don't cry and feel shit about someone who is supposedly part of their lives. Maybe, huh, just maybe some of these folks are cold blooded people who could probably be serial killers!! Like that Green River killer who is an Aquarius sun cusp and had water in his chart too!

Gee thanks Lisa, you've been oh so helpful. Sorry I irritated you by asking.

I know what I need and thats why I ask. See, what I want, and yes, I think some of the other caps would agree, is I want hugs and a shoulder to cry on in private. In public, I'd rather my significant other be beside me but pleade dont hug me. If he were to hug me, that safety would break open the emotions and I would fall apart in public, which would be unacceptable for me. Whereas my sag mom needs to talk about the decased. My aries dad doesnt want to talk. My cancer aunt wants someone to comfort her so she can cry publically.

So can you see why I wanted an aquarius viewpoint?

Posted by tsar322
We celebrate death cuz it symbolizes progress. The person has moved onto bigger and things, so we bless them and wish them peace on their journey without our company.

I like that outlook.

Posted by lisabethur8
sigh i just get so riled up and irked when i read these things. I hate death, who likes it huh? who wants their loved ones gone??
no one.

Duh! That had nothing to do with my question. Did you really think I was asking how aquas felt about death? No. I asked what do you need from your partner.

Oh, and what yall are saying is pretty much what I thought. I will definitely keep it in mind and understand when he needs space. I will also pay attention to his body language as a guide and listen when he talks. Yall have helped a lot.

Posted by truecap

Posted by lisabethur8
what about you, truecap? how do you handle death?

Everyone believes that so and so and so under a sun sign is not gonna feel anything, well who doesn't feel a damn thing when a loved one is gone?? you think that it's easy and people can easily move on??
doesn't matter if an aqua has pisces in his/her chart. They're heartless human beings if they don't cry and feel shit about someone who is supposedly part of their lives. Maybe, huh, just maybe some of these folks are cold blooded people who could probably be serial killers!! Like that Green River killer who is an Aquarius sun cusp and had water in his chart too!

Gee thanks Lisa, you've been oh so helpful. Sorry I irritated you by asking.

I know what I need and thats why I ask. See, what I want, and yes, I think some of the other caps would agree, is I want hugs and a shoulder to cry on in private. In public, I'd rather my significant other be beside me but pleade dont hug me. If he were to hug me, that safety would break open the emotions and I would fall apart in public, which would be unacceptable for me. Whereas my sag mom needs to talk about the decased. My aries dad doesnt want to talk. My cancer aunt wants someone to comfort her so she can cry publically.

So can you see why I wanted an aquarius viewpoint?

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it's a weird question, because, when someone is grieving...why is it there is a "rule" for this? You reach out to people who need it obviously. You pretty much covered it, truecap. Your aqua is a guy so therefore, he's gonna act like a guy. Believe me, at funerals, the men don't cry!!! all of them in different sun signs. They cry in private.

Yes, I know theres not a rule on what to do. Everyone is different and need different things and i know just because you guys are aquas and hes an aqua that he will want the same thing as you. Just wanted to discuss it. Its okay if you dont want to share what you would want your husband to do for you if one of your parents passed away. I get it.

Once again, I appreciate everyone who was open and willing to offer their prefrences. It does help. Its a very helpless feeling not knowing what to say or what to do. Getting different perspectives and discussing it helps me to help him.

I meant he might not want the same things as you.

Posted by truecap
Yes, I know theres not a rule on what to do. Everyone is different and need different things and i know just because you guys are aquas and hes an aqua that he will want the same thing as you. Just wanted to discuss it. Its okay if you dont want to share what you would want your husband to do for you if one of your parents passed away. I get it.

Once again, I appreciate everyone who was open and willing to offer their prefrences. It does help. Its a very helpless feeling not knowing what to say or what to do. Getting different perspectives and discussing it helps me to help him.

y'know i dont really know... i hope not for a long time.

Posted by lisabethur8

Posted by truecap
Yes, I know theres not a rule on what to do. Everyone is different and need different things and i know just because you guys are aquas and hes an aqua that he will want the same thing as you. Just wanted to discuss it. Its okay if you dont want to share what you would want your husband to do for you if one of your parents passed away. I get it.

Once again, I appreciate everyone who was open and willing to offer their prefrences. It does help. Its a very helpless feeling not knowing what to say or what to do. Getting different perspectives and discussing it helps me to help him.

y'know i dont really know... i hope not for a long time.

click to expand

Me too! Wouldn't wish this on anyone.

First, sorry for the loss. I know he was your bf father but you guys have been together for a few tears and I am assuming you have gotten to know his dad, so sympathy to all of you.

As for the grief, that's a tough one since everyone deals with it differently. I throw myself into work to avoid those emotions. Others will have a good cry and be over it. I think perhaps his moon might tell you a bit more on how he may deal with this since it is emotions. Do what others have suggested give him space but let him know you are there. You know that weird balance of support without being overbearing you have to walk with us Aquas. 🙂

Hugs to you all.

Thanks justagirl. I appreciate it and thanks. His moon is virgo.