
CancerLeoDynamite
@CancerLeoDynamite
13 Years1,000+ Posts
Comments: 0 · Posts: 1074 · Topics: 32


Posted by starlover
Because people become complacent when they are in a relationship...it finishes..they start to change..i had two Aqua men do this to me. The guy that buys the woman flowers because he is guilty or scared of losing her comes to mind
They seem to love the push/pull dynamic ~ not sure about you, but i am not interested in that kind of r.ship

Posted by truecap
I think everyone gains weight when in a relationship. I call it happy pounds. 🙂
Men get lazy though once they know they've got ya. Then when they lose you or are about to lose you, they try harder. Most of the time, by then, it's too little, too late.
Men can be clueles sometimes. Maybe he thinks you walked because HE gained weight? —?
*shrugs*

Posted by truecap
I think everyone gains weight when in a relationship. I call it happy pounds. 🙂
Men get lazy though once they know they've got ya. Then when they lose you or are about to lose you, they try harder. Most of the time, by then, it's too little, too late.
Men can be clueles sometimes. Maybe he thinks you walked because HE gained weight? —?
*shrugs*






Posted by IrresistableScorp
Aquas can be passive-agressive and can dig in their heels especially if it has to do with their "individualism." Even to the detriment of their relationships. They'll hold onto their "individualism" before they compromise even if their individualism includes crappy behavior. At least that's what I've found. I'm going through this right now with my mom. But I also know that Aquas will think about needed compromises in their own time and eventually make adjustments--just don't expect them to acknowledge it or let you know that they they changed for you.
Also, deep down, Aquas can be very insecure. There can be a distinct undercurrent of pessimism in there.

Posted by JamjamPosted by IrresistableScorp
Aquas can be passive-agressive and can dig in their heels especially if it has to do with their "individualism." Even to the detriment of their relationships. They'll hold onto their "individualism" before they compromise even if their individualism includes crappy behavior. At least that's what I've found. I'm going through this right now with my mom. But I also know that Aquas will think about needed compromises in their own time and eventually make adjustments--just don't expect them to acknowledge it or let you know that they they changed for you.
Also, deep down, Aquas can be very insecure. There can be a distinct undercurrent of pessimism in there.
I agree with this as an Aquarius. We know we need to change but tell us we need to change and you will find that we do the opposite!! We have to do it on our own terms.
I know this is frustrating but you won't get anywhere by constantly hounding an aqua, even if it's for their own benefit.click to expand

uote>Posted by starlover
Did you ever try being single for a while?
Posted by starlover
Either way, i don't intend to go there again. Love Aqua men...but as friends
Re the *love* thing ~ i have come to realize, sometimes loving someone from afar, is preferable to one's health and sanity lolclick to expand

Posted by truecap
I think everyone gains weight when in a relationship. I call it happy pounds. 🙂
Men get lazy though once they know they've got ya. Then when they lose you or are about to lose you, they try harder. Most of the time, by then, it's too little, too late.
Men can be clueles sometimes. Maybe he thinks you walked because HE gained weight? —?
*shrugs*

Posted by lisabethur8
what's his chart, CLD?
if he is heavy.....

Posted by IrresistableScorp
Aquas can be passive-agressive and can dig in their heels especially if it has to do with their "individualism." Even to the detriment of their relationships.
Also, deep down, Aquas can be very insecure. There can be a distinct undercurrent of pessimism in there.

Posted by IAmMystified
@scorp
Yep, I have seen the pessimism. Kind of in a 2 faced sort of way.
To the general public, happy go lucky. Then later on, bitching and complaining about everything adn the people they were happy go lucky with a few minutes prior.
Such a turn off
Posted by CancerLeoDynamitePosted by truecap
I think everyone gains weight when in a relationship. I call it happy pounds. 🙂
Men get lazy though once they know they've got ya. Then when they lose you or are about to lose you, they try harder. Most of the time, by then, it's too little, too late.
Men can be clueles sometimes. Maybe he thinks you walked because HE gained weight? —?
*shrugs*
He knows I did not leave him because of his weight, I left him because he had a problem with mine.
I'm not even mad that he had a problem with mine, I truly believe you can't just change your appearance drastically in a relationship and expect your partner to remain attracted to you, but I also don't deserve the nightmare self esteem issues that come along with being with a man who is clearly not attracted to me and I really have to ask myself, if things were working out so well why was I gaining so much weight?
Well whatever I've lost over a stone so far and feel happier than I have in months.click to expand

Posted by CancerLeoDynamitePosted by IAmMystified
@scorp
Yep, I have seen the pessimism. Kind of in a 2 faced sort of way.
To the general public, happy go lucky. Then later on, bitching and complaining about everything adn the people they were happy go lucky with a few minutes prior.
Such a turn off
I found my Scorpio did this.
Aqua is content to let everyone know he is a pessimistic bastard 😆
Except small children and animals who he is actually endearingly sweet to.click to expand


Posted by lisabethur8
that's what I mean. It is insecurity. Because HONESTLY, he does NOT show you any SECURITY.
if he did, you wouldn't hesitate or complain right?
If you felt SECURE, you'd be happy and all those "flaws" are nothing. He is a superficial man, who is looking for "perfect" in his idealistic brain. there is nothing PERFECT.
A woman needs to feel secure, and if he's complaining about "weight" and showing about how awesome he is, then what does that mean? It means he's still idealising or dreaming about the past of what he wishes and it is hopeless. He'll never be happy because he's looking for something that does not exist.
A woman will never be secure in his eyes. You got away good; he didn't love you at all. That's not love. Let him be.

Posted by The_eleventh_sign_11
What is it with cancerians and catfish??

Posted by GobshitePosted by IrresistableScorp
Aquas can be passive-agressive and can dig in their heels especially if it has to do with their "individualism." Even to the detriment of their relationships. They'll hold onto their "individualism" before they compromise even if their individualism includes crappy behavior. At least that's what I've found. I'm going through this right now with my mom. But I also know that Aquas will think about needed compromises in their own time and eventually make adjustments--just don't expect them to acknowledge it or let you know that they they changed for you.
Also, deep down, Aquas can be very insecure. There can be a distinct undercurrent of pessimism in there.
I agree. Been there, done that.
The problem is, some of their crappy behaviour can be detrimental to the relationship. Time waits for no-man and life is too short. Sometimes, the non-Auqa partner has no choice but to pull the plug for the sake of their sanity.click to expand
Posted by CancerLeoDynamitePosted by lisabethur8
that's what I mean. It is insecurity. Because HONESTLY, he does NOT show you any SECURITY.
if he did, you wouldn't hesitate or complain right?
If you felt SECURE, you'd be happy and all those "flaws" are nothing. He is a superficial man, who is looking for "perfect" in his idealistic brain. there is nothing PERFECT.
A woman needs to feel secure, and if he's complaining about "weight" and showing about how awesome he is, then what does that mean? It means he's still idealising or dreaming about the past of what he wishes and it is hopeless. He'll never be happy because he's looking for something that does not exist.
A woman will never be secure in his eyes. You got away good; he didn't love you at all. That's not love. Let him be.
It's true he never loved me. I am pretty broken up about it, it is a major blow to my ego.
I don't say that in some pathetic whiny girl wah he doesn't love me way, I mean just calmly, genuinely as fact.
He loves me the way you love a friend.
he has never been IN love with me.
TBH I'm not sure I was ever IN love with him either so aside from my ego I'm not sure wtf I'm so upset about.
I don't like being compared unfavorably to his ex.
He lives in the past, how am I at 32 supposed to compare to his memory of a 19 year old he was head over heels in love with as a man in his young 20s?
It's ridiculous.
It seems a lot of men I meet are unable to move on from their first real loves, and it's absolutely pathetic.
Stop living in the past and make the most of NOW.
click to expand

Posted by GobshitePosted by lisabethur8Posted by CancerLeoDynamitePosted by lisabethur8
that's what I mean. It is insecurity. Because HONESTLY, he does NOT show you any SECURITY.
if he did, you wouldn't hesitate or complain right?
If you felt SECURE, you'd be happy and all those "flaws" are nothing. He is a superficial man, who is looking for "perfect" in his idealistic brain. there is nothing PERFECT.
A woman needs to feel secure, and if he's complaining about "weight" and showing about how awesome he is, then what does that mean? It means he's still idealising or dreaming about the past of what he wishes and it is hopeless. He'll never be happy because he's looking for something that does not exist.
A woman will never be secure in his eyes. You got away good; he didn't love you at all. That's not love. Let him be.
It's true he never loved me. I am pretty broken up about it, it is a major blow to my ego.
I don't say that in some pathetic whiny girl wah he doesn't love me way, I mean just calmly, genuinely as fact.
He loves me the way you love a friend.
he has never been IN love with me.
TBH I'm not sure I was ever IN love with him either so aside from my ego I'm not sure wtf I'm so upset about.
I don't like being compared unfavorably to his ex.
He lives in the past, how am I at 32 supposed to compare to his memory of a 19 year old he was head over heels in love with as a man in his young 20s?
It's ridiculous.
It seems a lot of men I meet are unable to move on from their first real loves, and it's absolutely pathetic.
Stop living in the past and make the most of NOW.
i agree with you. I hate those types. That's why i got with a hubby that does not even mention Ex's at all!!! that is a HUGE red flag if a guy talks about his "ex" this and "ex" that. Something is seriously wrong with him that he can't "let go"..... PATHETIC!!
So, I guess that makes the women who do this pathetic as well...click to expand
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Now before you even go there no he isn't cheating.
Yes I know this for a fact. There's just no way it's not his style (I have known him a long time) and he is constantly calling, available ANY TIME I want to call or txt him he's just not - in fact I almost wish he were, because at least that would make sense.
anyway
Okay fine, it's not working I'm not good enough or whatever the fuck so I walked.
He wanted to remain friends, fine whatever sure I didn't much fancy the idea of just throwing away someone I have thought of as my best friend for several years now
So wtf
he is calling me every day
He is still using his bf tone of voice, you know the one aquas would rather die than be caught using with anyone else ever?
He calls me sweetypie etc when we say goodbye.
He has said things like "well maybe we can try again in a little bit after we've gotten our lives in order"
I think what he means by that is after I lose weight.
Fuck that
yes I gained weight over the last year..
I gained weight EATING THE WAY HIS FAT ASS EATS.
yes I am losing it and when I do I want to find someone who is as interested as I am in living a healthy life style .
I can't tell you how many times I suggested we go for a walk, or eat salad and he had ZERO INTEREST.
Anyway now he's dropping hints that he has been working out etc.
So explain this to me, WHY THE HELL WASN'T HE DOING ANY OF THIS WHEN WE WERE TOGETHER?
Things were clearly not working if we weren't having sex and now my leo pride is hurt.
I just don't even know what to think at this point, please if you can enlighten me as to this aquas crazy thought process here.