Aries Detachment

Is it just me or is it an Aries thing? ??_I find it hard to get emotionally close to people, I like meeting people, I like hanging out with others, and I can be very friendly with almost anyone (so long as they are) but the moment someone tries and take it further and be closer to me as a friend or whatever (guys or girls) I start running ??_

Like for example, I know a nice girl at work, I??ve known her for 5 months; we talk and stuff at work, sometimes we have lunch together, but if she asked me 2 days in a row to join her, I would feel annoyed, it's like I don't want her to take it as a habit of me going with her for lunch all the time, and when she asks me to join her and do some activities on the weekend or something I just refuse, she is very nice and all and we have good conversation, but I just don't like the idea of getting close to her or anyone.

Even my manager (a very old man so don't get any ideas), we've always got along together, but lately he is been telling me secrets and stuff about things that happens at work, and it makes me feel weird, like —why you telling me this? As if I am your best friend :s?? ??_ Is there something wrong with me?

I only cared about very people in my whole entire life (especially Mr. Cap, it is like he had me under a magic spell, and that's why I cant let him go, because he made me feel things I never felt for anyone else) ??_ and few other friends that I lived with for a while, but hardly anyone else ??_ Can anyone relate?

Space is very important to me. You have to be very special before I will share it with you.

I also tend to find people pretty boring. I really don't care about your dog! Please don't relate how many times he fetched a stupid stick, again!!!!


I am way intense much (too much) of the time. I really don't like leaving burnt out hulks in my wake, so I tend to be guarded with myself. I find it better if people are cool to me, as compared to actually hostile after I have spun them around a few times, and left them totally befuddled with what just happened. Don't stand to close to the whirlygig, you might get caught up in it.

^^^Opps, I totally love your dog, though ImpressMe....

Did I mention I am pretty much clueless, and it saves a lot of pain and suffering if I am left alone..

It isn't you oxlostxo. You see things differently, and relate to people on different levels. If you WERE friends you would enjoy their company etc. Just because someone gets up all in your business and invites you all the time to go out doesn't mean they are a friend or even loved one. Doesn't mean you can't relate to them, just you don't want to be in a mediocre relationship. And there is nothing wrong with that.

At work, I don't mind going out with the gang at work for lunch even if it is lame most of the time, but heck if I am going to be all gushy about it 100% . If we all had some connection besides sitting in the same office then maybe, or maybe if they were interesting people beyond having likes and dislikes and lived in the same area.

We are deeper than the stereotype of us is, we just want I guess something to work with at times, and other times we want absolute effortless companionship. For me there is nothing worse between me and another person where I try to attend the lunches and the evenings out, and I just don't feel like everything is clicking, then later I am like why did I go out just for the sake of going out, when I could have read a book or something.

Then! there is the wonderful connections. That make your heart sing. I love my best friends, though they are sprinkled around the country, I get so zoned in when talking or hanging out, and mind you these are friends I may not have anything in common but we definitely share an interest in each others lives.

Don't feel like it is you is what I am trying to say. And definitely don't dwell on some false idea that other people are at issue with anything. Just know some people relate on different levels, and you have a go with the flow attitude most of the time, but deep connections matter to you as well.

*wipes her brow* ... phew ... I thought I was some sort of a weirdo for a while there. But then you guys kind of made it clearer. Yes heroic guy, the connection is the thing, I don't connect to many people, it's like I am very picky of who I put on my friend list ... there are people that I call friend just because there is no other way of refering to them, and then there are the FRIENDS FRIENDS and those are the ones that have a special place in my heart (those are mainly people I shared an important experience with) and like you said heroic guy, we might not share anything in common, but there is that connection and a comfort in their company.

And ImpressMe you are right, I need my space to recharge as well, I expect people around me to know when to talk and when to leave me alone. But there are just too many personal space invaders lol ..

Hello oxlostxo, i hope you ared oing fine, despite this post! 😉

In your profile i look at your placements, i think this is you Capricorn Ascendant combined with Saturn in Scorpio. I have the same too, and i can relate to what you are talkign about.

Many times i have hard time to connect and suddenly a person appear and i have an immediate connection. I don't feel this with many people, in fact it is rare.
But doN't compare yourself to others, until it start to bother you. I mean i see people around me who "seems" to be connected to each other (even as husband and wife), then suddenly i get an insight to the relationship and i realise that there is no real soul connection.

I think Cap asc makes you trust harder, or open up harder, but it is the Scorpio Saturn who is kind of strict with feeling. I am not sure if you are the same, but sometimes i think i only want to experience some feelings with only one person in my whole life. I am not somebody who could go out with different men every month. Because i would definitely not let myself to connect them. maybe i would be even disgusted to give my most precious and secretive feeling to them.

And when i hold back with the feelings (for different reasons) it means i can't connect.

But opposite of the popular belief i don't think it's wrong. We should accept it, and stop comparing ourselves to others.

About your manager. Truthfully, i know many people who start to talk about his/her problem to me. You may feel the need that you should connect to her, but why? Just because she tells you something? I think it's because inside you are somehwta pure, and a sincere person. You feel if she trust you you should respect that, or listen or i don't know. But i know many people who doesn't tell me their problems because they connect to me. They are not thinking on this level at all. They just share themselves with whoever they meet. It's not bad, just they work differently in this question. They just share, mand make connection but the quality of that connection is not always equal the definiton of your connection.

Also, when there is a bit more depressed period in my life, i have harder time to connect.
Don't push yourself. If you can't connect to every people you meet, don't force it, or don't feel as less of a person. I am sure making a good, quality connection takes time.

I am not sure if i could help. I read some good answers, but wanted to talk to you a bit. 🙂 Good luck with Mr. Cap! ;

If I feel I have a real connection with you, you are someone I have known for a long time, then I may, possibly, listen to your sad story. I sort of feel that I need to be there for you, and to be truly sincere and try and help.

But, if you are just another phony, political hack with a chronic case of verbal diarrhea, get the hell out of my face!!!

I have actually got to sit and chat with a boss or two about being "blunt." If you are an insincere, backstabbing, hateful person, don't expect me to care, listen, or pretend to care or listen. If you have real hurt and need, and there is something I can do, even listening, I will be there for you.


Huge differences here, as we are all aware.

Hey Flora! *hug*

Thanks for checking up on me 🙂

Posted by FlorasSecret
I am not sure if you are the same, but sometimes i think i only want to experience some feelings with only one person in my whole life. I am not somebody who could go out with different men every month. Because i would definitely not let myself to connect them. maybe i would be even disgusted to give my most precious and secretive feeling to them.

Yes spot on, I totally agree with this one, but when mr.cap came alone, suddenly there is this connection that I never felt before, and I know now that if this doesn't work out, no one else will make me feel in the same way. I am not the lovey dovey sort of person, but he brings the soft side out of me and no one else has ever managed to do that.
And as for friendship, I also don't want to share it with just anyone, and I thought that was weird, but you are right, I shouldn't worry about what the other people are like, it is probably like you said anyone, something that's on the surface but once you look deeper into it, there isn't much to see.

Yeah me too..I also feel emotionally detached. I don't like being overwhelmed emotionally and I like to spend some time alone.
I always have so much going on in my mind and never feel alone even when I am alone LOL.