Last night was rough, I miss him and the kids, family and friends...Plus PMS isn't helping! LOL!
Aries Man Says He Needs Space (Page 2)
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Posted by grae64
I don't know if it just men or Aries...I wish they could just communicate and let others know what the heck is going on!
Men are not like women. As soon as you realize this, the faster you'll start to understand.
WHY do women constantly insert their own reactions and how they handle things in place of how men should act?
I don't even like how you have so many women here giving you shit advice. For some reason, women love to perpetuate the bs that we're constantly fighting against in dating and relating and it's utterly detrimental to us all.
The guy wants to friend zone you, keep benefits, all while he has the freedom to look for someone else. WHY are you entertaining keeping this dipshit around?
Way to be a beaten wife, honey. You ain't gonna get ANY respect from anyone if you tolerate this type of crap.
Posted by LIb4Life
...you're an idiot, sorry. This is far from a "positive" converstation and all of you are great examples of why I DON'T go to women for advice. You're all encouraging negative behavior under the guise of giving this poor girl what she wants to hear. That is far from positive and absolutely destructive to her overall wellbeing.
Now be gone. Women like you shouldn't be giving advice. You just make things worse. Same with the psycho virgo over there.
OP, none of this is good. I could drag in any of my guy friends to read your situation and they'd tell you the same thing. People here are skewing positivity into straight up delusion, and claims of "negativity" are covering up honesty.
Sure, it's your choice in what you want to do, but you came here, wanting to know what's going on and ultimately I'd hope that means wanting what's best for your overall wellbeing. Many of these coddling answers are anything but. You need to listen to logic, not your vagina.
"...but he makes my lady bits tingle."
He treats you like shit. Either put up and shut up, or drop his ass. It's that simple.
Posted by rockyroadicecreamPosted by LIb4Life
...you're an idiot, sorry. This is far from a "positive" converstation and all of you are great examples of why I DON'T go to women for advice. You're all encouraging negative behavior under the guise of giving this poor girl what she wants to hear. That is far from positive and absolutely destructive to her overall wellbeing.
Now be gone. Women like you shouldn't be giving advice. You just make things worse. Same with the psycho virgo over there.
OP, none of this is good. I could drag in any of my guy friends to read your situation and they'd tell you the same thing. People here are skewing positivity into straight up delusion, and claims of "negativity" are covering up honesty.
Sure, it's your choice in what you want to do, but you came here, wanting to know what's going on and ultimately I'd hope that means wanting what's best for your overall wellbeing. Many of these coddling answers are anything but. You need to listen to logic, not your vagina.
"...but he makes my lady bits tingle."
He treats you like shit. Either put up and shut up, or drop his ass. It's that simple.click to expand
I hate to admit it to myself but you are probably right...I just live in that eternal hope that he really does just need space...I truly have been preparing myself for the worst, but for once would just like to have it go my way...The sheer fact he can continue his life with friends and family with no regard to me tells me everything I REALLY need to know. I guess because I could NEVER do that to someone I don't want to believe he would do that...
I am an idiot, and usually am an idiot in every relationship I get into...Being nice doesn't get you sh**, and I have yet to learn how to be a bit**, seems to be the people who are in great relationships!
Im sorry this has been so long in coming. My computer was not playing internet nice...
I appreciate all of your views. I agree this relationship is not completely in my direction...but after 30 years, I have learned that picking my battles has become very important. The older we get the more set in our ways we are. SO! those of us on the outside have to either learn to adjust to someone we love or turn them completely away. Like I said before I have taken care of people since I was 19 (now almost 50) it is really hard to break that pattern...I want to know the answer to changing from being the "too nice" person to a bi***, because those are the people who seem to get where they are and what they want...
I appreciate all of your views. I agree this relationship is not completely in my direction...but after 30 years, I have learned that picking my battles has become very important. The older we get the more set in our ways we are. SO! those of us on the outside have to either learn to adjust to someone we love or turn them completely away. Like I said before I have taken care of people since I was 19 (now almost 50) it is really hard to break that pattern...I want to know the answer to changing from being the "too nice" person to a bi***, because those are the people who seem to get where they are and what they want...
Posted by grae64
I don't think you're an idiot. I think we've all been in a spot where we wanted to hope for the best of a person, but they just proved to be the douche they are.
I know where you're coming from. I've been there before and it sucks. Yes, it would be nice for once for it to work out in your favor. It gets old that these douchelords behave like this with no consequence to their actions.
But you gotta remember two things- if you put your foot down and do NOT tolerate, thus putting them in their place is rather empowering. You have to really experience it to get why it feels so good... and why you would want to do it again down the road to any jerk who tries this crap.
The other thing is that you may not see it now, but karma WILL get them. It's something I've learned as I've gotten older. The people who screw you over WILL get theirs. It may not be now, but it eventually will. In my experience, every guy who fell into the douchelord category eventually had karma catch up to them.
...And I loled.
Posted by starlover
Ladies, i started to talk to a man online...seemed okay, then he pulled back and i sensed he was *scared* ... got a reading from my psychic and she said this
*he is confused (not in relations to you and him conversing) , more so confused in what he wants out of life*.
I found out he was 48 and an Aries (sun, merc and venus)
Aaaaahhh what is wrong with these men?? Do they ever grow up and man up?
:rollseyes:
OMGEEEE what the FFFFF...that's the same exact chart as my ex.
Confusion/not knowing what he wants/regret over being too confused and not knowing what he wants out of life and his past relationships/more confusion/then anxiety because so confused. Round and round they go weeeeeee. I almost feel sorry for them.
Sorry - don't mean to hijack either 😛
Posted by SassyVirgoPosted by grae64Posted by rockyroadicecreamPosted by LIb4Life
...you're an idiot, sorry. This is far from a "positive" converstation and all of you are great examples of why I DON'T go to women for advice. You're all encouraging negative behavior under the guise of giving this poor girl what she wants to hear. That is far from positive and absolutely Destructive to her overall wellbeing.Now be gone.Women like you shouldn't be giving advice. You just make things worse. Same with the psycho virgo over there."...but he makes my lady bits tingle."
He treats you like shit. Either put up and shut up, or drop his ass. It's that simple.
click to expand
rockyroadicecream even though I agree with you on this "particular" post, which is rare...just because a person speaks of positiveness doesn't make them an idiot! And I'm no fuckin body's idiot! so you BE GONE!! Life is what you make it and Grae64 was just asking for advice, so I doubt very seriously if she is stupid enough to NOT see the writing on the wall with this foul azz Aries man she was involved with, and just for the record, there's a positive side to every fucked up situation when you look at the big picture, and in her case the positive side is now she is rid of this azz hole. It may hurt now, but she'll be better off in the long run because a selfish, self centered azzhole like him can only make her life more miserable, so I think she's doing damn good. Plus, I don't know about other women, but there is no amount of dick on this planet to make me compromise the dignity and the respect that I have for myself. If need be, I can make my own lady bits tingle...damnit! and that's why I would never go to a man for advice.
Thank you for all of the support. I really am just looking for thoughts and opinions that I may not have already thought about. I don't take offense to anything anyone says, we all have our opinions and I put it out there for them to come back.I try to take in everything as a learning experience and look at sides I may not always think about or even want to hear, but it can all be very valuable.
Posted by starlover
grae..do you know his chart apsects at all.....i am interested to test my theory 😄
I hope this is what you are looking for: April 8, 1964, not sure of time, birthplace Cuyahoga Falls, Ohio, if the information below is wrong.
Zodiac in degrees 0.00 Time unknown
Sun Aries 18.53
Moon Aquarius 29.00
Mercury Taurus 7.59
Venus Gemini 4.37
Mars Aries 7.57
Jupiter Aries 29.09
Saturn Pisces 1.35
Uranus Virgo 6.26 R
Neptune Scorpio 17.12 R
Pluto Virgo 12.04 R
Lilith Sagittarius 9.27
Asc node Cancer 5.34
Sun House 10
Moon House 8
Mercury House 10
Venus House 11
Mars House 9
Jupiter House 10
Saturn House 8
Uranus House 2
Neptune House 4
Pluto House 2
Chiron House 8
Ceres House 6
Pallas House 5
Juno House 5
Vesta House 7
Node House 12
Lilith House 5
Fortune House 11
I hope this is right.
Moon House 8
Mercury House 10
Venus House 11
Mars House 9
Jupiter House 10
Saturn House 8
Uranus House 2
Neptune House 4
Pluto House 2
Chiron House 8
Ceres House 6
Pallas House 5
Juno House 5
Vesta House 7
Node House 12
Lilith House 5
Fortune House 11
I hope this is right.
Wow you nailed that one pretty well...His job requires him to be somewhat available most of the day via phone/email, and he does like his alone time. When your Aries would need space/break did he usually come back around?
He is not controlling at all, except for right now when all of this is under his control! LOL
While my Aries never officially told me he needed a break, towards the end one of the things I did notice is that when he had his daughter he would be up my azz Fri/Sat/Sun but then when he didn't have her he was MIA. Texts were few and far between and I found I would be the one initiating most of them. I called him out and he got a tude with me. Okayy, so I'm ok to bring your daughter around (which I guess is a compliment) but I'm not ok to have a r/s and do the everyday stuff with? Now I'M confused! Makes you feel used. Like I said before, to this day he uses pics of his daughter to start texts but if I ask anything about anything his family, co-workers etc he fades out. What gives?
Just be careful with him and the kids - don't let him try to take advantage of you. Not saying he will, not going to dog all Aries men in general, you just sound very nice and giving, would hate for him to pull that stunt. Not sure if these guys consciously take advantage and know it or they just flip flop wanting u/not wanting u - STILL CONFUSED??
Just be careful with him and the kids - don't let him try to take advantage of you. Not saying he will, not going to dog all Aries men in general, you just sound very nice and giving, would hate for him to pull that stunt. Not sure if these guys consciously take advantage and know it or they just flip flop wanting u/not wanting u - STILL CONFUSED??
OMG, confused is a total understatement...
The funny thing with mine is, when he has his daughter, that is pretty much "their" time, unless they are going to dinner or she wants me to come over or whatever. I help with the kids and I love the fact that they are comfortable with me. He introduced them to me 4 days after we had gone out, which to me was WAYYYY to soon, I also have kids, and they are grown I still waited to introduce them even though his boys know my daughter.
Who knows, they are all weird...I will just be curious to see how it all comes out, if this will just blow over like things have with his friends or not...
I don't know how you can go from spending weekends with someone, texts, talks, etc., then just totally shut them out forever. I could understand more if something specific had happened. The one thing I am sure of other than going to talk to him for that few minutes is this is not about me so I can't beat myself up over that. He is basically shutting everyone else out too.
The funny thing with mine is, when he has his daughter, that is pretty much "their" time, unless they are going to dinner or she wants me to come over or whatever. I help with the kids and I love the fact that they are comfortable with me. He introduced them to me 4 days after we had gone out, which to me was WAYYYY to soon, I also have kids, and they are grown I still waited to introduce them even though his boys know my daughter.
Who knows, they are all weird...I will just be curious to see how it all comes out, if this will just blow over like things have with his friends or not...
I don't know how you can go from spending weekends with someone, texts, talks, etc., then just totally shut them out forever. I could understand more if something specific had happened. The one thing I am sure of other than going to talk to him for that few minutes is this is not about me so I can't beat myself up over that. He is basically shutting everyone else out too.
Yeah, it can seem weird if you think about it. Mine had weekends where he wouldn't leave his apt. Not answer calls/texts - would just be him and his imagination, he would sometimes send me dark pics of himself...maybe he was in a state of depression when he would do that, who knows. He lost his dad in 2010 and he took it really hard.
Re: the kids, I take it to be they felt at ease with us and wanted to share that side of their lives...but it stops there? Enter 'THE CONFUSION'...oooooh scary. I would help him with his daughter bcuz she was a toddler and a handful. He didn't have much experience but me and my kids would just take over with her and I could almost hear his sigh of relief. Hey, I know being a single parent isn't easy when they're little but come on...if you're wanting to spend time with your gf mostly when you have the baby, you don't think she's gonna see the pattern after a while?
In the beginning he would ask me if I loved him and call me babe...I was like whoa ok. At the end of that year he went into a funk over the holidays and I was barely hearing from him at all. We went out one night to have a couple of drinks and that's when he apologized and says he was missing his dad but he really did love me and I made him feel better. About 6 mos after that he began distancing himself from me and that was Year 2 coming to a close.
Do Aries men typically fall in/out of love quickly?
Re: the kids, I take it to be they felt at ease with us and wanted to share that side of their lives...but it stops there? Enter 'THE CONFUSION'...oooooh scary. I would help him with his daughter bcuz she was a toddler and a handful. He didn't have much experience but me and my kids would just take over with her and I could almost hear his sigh of relief. Hey, I know being a single parent isn't easy when they're little but come on...if you're wanting to spend time with your gf mostly when you have the baby, you don't think she's gonna see the pattern after a while?
In the beginning he would ask me if I loved him and call me babe...I was like whoa ok. At the end of that year he went into a funk over the holidays and I was barely hearing from him at all. We went out one night to have a couple of drinks and that's when he apologized and says he was missing his dad but he really did love me and I made him feel better. About 6 mos after that he began distancing himself from me and that was Year 2 coming to a close.
Do Aries men typically fall in/out of love quickly?
Omg!!! What a loooooong thread! This should have stopped at page 4 😄
So this guy is just as old as you are and he's proposing fwb?
Why aren't you running yet?
Why aren't you running yet?
Posted by rockyroadicecream
So this guy is just as old as you are and he's proposing fwb?
Why aren't you running yet?
FWB has never come up, I'm not sure where that came from. I definitely would be running if that were the case, I would never agree to that. I am an all or nothing girl.
I am giving him a chance, he is really a great guy, this is the first time he has ever done anything like this. Like I said in my original post, everything with us was great, so that is where all my confusion comes from.
So I think I just found out one of the main reasons for this "space"...I get our Legal newspaper at work and saw that he is being sued for several thousands of dollars...Was recorded and delivered to him within 2 days of this whole mess...
WOW!!! I guess he will need much more space...
WOW!!! I guess he will need much more space...
Posted by grae64
So I think I just found out one of the main reasons for this "space"...I get our Legal newspaper at work and saw that he is being sued for several thousands of dollars...Was recorded and delivered to him within 2 days of this whole mess...
WOW!!! I guess he will need much more space...
Omg grae!!!!! U think you know someone!
Well at least u know it's not about you! No go live your life!!!!
Exactly what I am doing...Makes much more sense now.
That's crazy.. glad it wasn't about you though!
I want to go to him, send a text whatever. But then am I crossing the line of him asking for space? It is a double edged sword here...
So I finally got my answer...unfortunately not the answer I was hoping for. I received an email last night before I left my office saying, I was the perfect girlfriend, friend & companion, has nothing negative to say about me or our relationship, has been trying to find a time, place and way to talk to me about this for some time, basically just not in love with me. Questioning if he can't be in love with me then who can or will he ever be in love with, says he is damaged. Me with my personality want to jump back in there and "fix" him, but I know I cannot do this, he is the only one that can.
So again, I want to thank all of you for your insights and thoughts, but it is now over and I have to find a way to move on from a man, his family and friends that I love very much...Being an adult is sure not fun in anyway!
So again, I want to thank all of you for your insights and thoughts, but it is now over and I have to find a way to move on from a man, his family and friends that I love very much...Being an adult is sure not fun in anyway!
Ouch. Sorry to hear grae but there's something better in store for you out there.
Posted by tiziani
Irrespective of everything, you both gave each other the truth of the matter in the end. Some people go an entire lifetime without getting that much from each other. A lot of guys would rather just be the one that "rode off into the sunset" but he let you know the score. Good luck.
Good words tiz
Best of luck with everything grae
*hugs*
Thank you so much. Yes, as much as it was not what I wanted to happen, I know if it wasn't meant to be then it would never have worked. I also know that I got more out of him in his email than I ever would have sitting and talking or even on the phone, because emotions would have gotten in the way. He has always been and will always be a very honest man with everything he says and was very very sweet about me and our relationship.
It is still hard, I will miss him for a very long time. I returned things to him (his truck) this morning as well as picking things up out of the truck that he had of mine, has been a tough morning, but that is the end, that is until we run into each other since we only live 5 minutes apart and 2 of his kids are friends with my daughter...it will all be good!
Thanks again!
It is still hard, I will miss him for a very long time. I returned things to him (his truck) this morning as well as picking things up out of the truck that he had of mine, has been a tough morning, but that is the end, that is until we run into each other since we only live 5 minutes apart and 2 of his kids are friends with my daughter...it will all be good!
Thanks again!
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