Gemini Men? Or any man, how can I get my Gemini man to appreciate me again?

I’m going to try not to write a book lol. But he’s a gem, Aries moon & Taurus Venus. To sum it up we’ve been together for 6 months now and this past month has been constant arguing and butting heads. He used to be super adventurous and always wanting to go out and do stuff & would do anything to make me happy. But lately no matter what I bring up, dinner, movies, or trying something new he doesn’t want to do it. I asked him if he’s saving money he says no. & he shops all the time. He only wants to do it if it benefits him. I still see him everyday, & if not every day we’re on FT. I’m thinking maybe he’s mad at me because I haven’t been focused on school so much.. because I’m still exotic dancing and I’m supposed to be stopping soon. But he never brings that up so I’m not sure he cares... I have so much stuff at his place, I call him everyday to make sure he ate something healthy and that he takes his vitamins lol. I’m constantly making sure he’s happy. But he never does the same for me anymore. All he wants to do is stay in the house. He’ll make promises and blow me off and go out with his friends without me even tho he knows I want to get out of the house. I finally got sick of it & texted him when I was drunk that I was done w him. I blocked his number being upset. I’ve been hoping and praying he’ll show me cares and call me because I unblocked him. (He has 3 phones btw and never tried to call on the other 2) But it’s been 2 days. I feel so depressed. I don’t want our love to go to waste. He’s my best friend and he tells me all the time he never wants to lose me but he doesn’t show it. I’m just So bored all he does is come over I cook for him, we have sex and he stays the night or stays for hours and leaves. Does anybody have any advice on how to get the old him back? I’m 24 and this is my first serious relationship and I’ve never wanted to be with someone so bad.

Btw I’m an Aqua, Leo moon, & Aqua Venus.

I’ve been dating a Gemini for almost a year now. He has cancer moon which makes him a homebody and sometimes that irritates me as well, as an extrovert who always likes to go out and be wherever the party is at.

It’s sorta funny, I dropped out of college shortly after meeting him. School just isn’t for everyone.

My advice is get friends to take your mind off him. The more busy you make yourself, the less concerned you’ll be on your relationship.

People here say you can’t change a Gemini because they don’t like being controlled, but I think if your requests are small enough they will shape their behavior to accommodate you, that is if they do love you.

Posted by tiziani

Your story makes me wonder if you both had any common interests?

Other than obviously the blocking and rejecting doesn't help your cause. just talk it out like adults and stick or split.

Well I thought we did but now it might be that he was just putting on a front because he knows that’s what I like. I feel he doesn’t care about making me happy anymore because he knows I won’t go anywhere. I don’t know how to change this.

Why do you need a fancy dinner or event to be able to connect with him?

Like I get the urge to go out and spend money and have fun in a public social environment. But at the same time...you should be able to have fun just chilln one on one.

Also appreciation isn’t in the form of how much $ $ a man can throw at you. All that means is your a prop for his ego.

Appreciation is when he listens and really hears you. Appreciation is when he gives you that quality time. Appreciation is when he opens up to you beyond the superficial level.

Fuckboy 🚨

Posted by LadyNeptune

Also appreciation isn’t in the form of how much $ $ a man can throw at you. All that means is your a prop for his ego.

Appreciation is when he listens and really hears you. Appreciation is when he gives you that quality time. Appreciation is when he opens up to you beyond the superficial level.

Nah it’s definitely more than the money. Trust me I know the difference. I offer to pay almost always & I’m always spoiling him but it’s not reciprocated. He gives me his time but I need more than that.

Posted by purplehearts94

Posted by LadyNeptune

Also appreciation isn’t in the form of how much $ $ a man can throw at you. All that means is your a prop for his ego.

Appreciation is when he listens and really hears you. Appreciation is when he gives you that quality time. Appreciation is when he opens up to you beyond the superficial level.

Nah it’s definitely more than the money. Trust me I know the difference. I offer to pay almost always & I’m always spoiling him but it’s not reciprocated. He gives me his time but I need more than that.

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What do you need?

Posted by GemFallOut

Not a guy, but I am a Gemini with a Taurus Venus.

To be honest, arguing to a certain point is fun, then it becomes a headache. I had a relationship with an Aquarius before that was my first love and that's all we did as well. I was super crazy about him as well. Like did things for him financially that I will not most likely ever make outside of my husband ever again. I too, like your bf, went out of my way to make him happy and in a lot of ways, he was detached and nonchalant about it.

At times, yes he was caring about me, but for the most part, we fought all the time, and one day... something happened. I just didn't care anymore. He broke it off with me for the last time and I didn't go running after him. I let it go because a part of me had clocked out already. Also, apart of me wanted to see what else was out there as the fighting had worn me down.

If your Gemini hasn't come looking for you and it's been over a week in time.... with a Venus in Taurus, he may be almost clocking out. That Venus will keep me in relationships I know are dying but the loyalty it instills is tough to break.

I'm not sure what you guys are fighting about but it's time to make a decision. Either be alone or figure out what needs to change on both sides to slow the arguing down.

He’s pretty loyal to my knowledge. I just want to save my relationship. & get back to how things used to be.

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by purplehearts94

Posted by LadyNeptune

Also appreciation isn’t in the form of how much $ $ a man can throw at you. All that means is your a prop for his ego.

Appreciation is when he listens and really hears you. Appreciation is when he gives you that quality time. Appreciation is when he opens up to you beyond the superficial level.

Nah it’s definitely more than the money. Trust me I know the difference. I offer to pay almost always & I’m always spoiling him but it’s not reciprocated. He gives me his time but I need more than that.

What do you need?

click to expand

To not be in the house every day caked up, eating up everything in the house & watching him play 2k lol. I’m cool with that as long as we’re together but recently the past couple weeks he doesn’t want to leave the house. He knew what he signed up for. That’s how he got me, most guys want to show me off and go to the club but he wanted to go to water parks, the museum, the beach, just anything. Doesn’t even cost that much and now I’m BEGGING HIM. The last straw was him saying that we were going to our to eat but he COMPLETELY ignored my phone calls and blew me off. & then went out with friends. I couldn’t take it. I miss him he’s my best friend, I just want to make it work 😢

Posted by purplehearts94

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by purplehearts94

Posted by LadyNeptune

Also appreciation isn’t in the form of how much $ $ a man can throw at you. All that means is your a prop for his ego.

Appreciation is when he listens and really hears you. Appreciation is when he gives you that quality time. Appreciation is when he opens up to you beyond the superficial level.

Nah it’s definitely more than the money. Trust me I know the difference. I offer to pay almost always & I’m always spoiling him but it’s not reciprocated. He gives me his time but I need more than that.

What do you need?

To not be in the house every day caked up, eating up everything in the house & watching him play 2k lol. I’m cool with that as long as we’re together but recently the past couple weeks he doesn’t want to leave the house. He knew what he signed up for. That’s how he got me, most guys want to show me off and go to the club but he wanted to go to water parks, the museum, the beach, just anything. Doesn’t even cost that much and now I’m BEGGING HIM. The last straw was him saying that we were going to our to eat but he COMPLETELY ignored my phone calls and blew me off. & then went out with friends. I couldn’t take it. I miss him he’s my best friend, I just want to make it work 😢

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I feel you.

People also get complacent once the courting phase is over. He feels he has you and is getting comfy. Let him know what’s up. THEN get upset and mad if he doesn’t do anything about it.

Btw I’m with a Gemini man but I have the Aries moon, Taurus ven and I definitely carve out time for my friends. I need the alone space and social time with friends outside of the relationship. Way healthier that way I feel.

Posted by GemFallOut

Posted by purplehearts94

Posted by GemFallOut

Not a guy, but I am a Gemini with a Taurus Venus.

To be honest, arguing to a certain point is fun, then it becomes a headache. I had a relationship with an Aquarius before that was my first love and that's all we did as well. I was super crazy about him as well. Like did things for him financially that I will not most likely ever make outside of my husband ever again. I too, like your bf, went out of my way to make him happy and in a lot of ways, he was detached and nonchalant about it.

At times, yes he was caring about me, but for the most part, we fought all the time, and one day... something happened. I just didn't care anymore. He broke it off with me for the last time and I didn't go running after him. I let it go because a part of me had clocked out already. Also, apart of me wanted to see what else was out there as the fighting had worn me down.

If your Gemini hasn't come looking for you and it's been over a week in time.... with a Venus in Taurus, he may be almost clocking out. That Venus will keep me in relationships I know are dying but the loyalty it instills is tough to break.

I'm not sure what you guys are fighting about but it's time to make a decision. Either be alone or figure out what needs to change on both sides to slow the arguing down.

He’s pretty loyal to my knowledge. I just want to save my relationship. & get back to how things used to be.

I'm sure he is. It's probably time to have a real adult conversation. None of that I'm done and blocking him out as with a Gemini we will pick up the mind game and immediately know you want us to chase and most times it won't happen. I refuse to do that kind of thing now. If you want a real adult relationship you gotta start making adult moves in the direction you are trying to go.

Telling someone to leave you alone and blocking numbers is high school stuff and the opposite of what you want him to do which I come close. Don't do that to him or better yet yourself. It's only costing you in the end if your goal is to keep him.

Talk with him and not from a level if you do this wrong or you do this wrong but from a level of mutual care and love. " babe I notice and I feel like so and so.. I may be wrong.. which is why I'm bringing it to the table." It may get rough but no real conversation regarding healing isn't. I'm sure if he's retreating he feels slighted as well. Hear him out and see his side while speaking your truth. Find the middle. It's going to be ok.

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Thanks for that. I’ve tried talking to him but maybe a heart to heart would be good. I’ve been trying not to argue with him anymore and we were doing good for about 2 weeks. He really hurt my feelings tho.. like I understand if you need time out but he doesn’t even tell me or let me know. Idk man. I’m gonna unblock his number and give it a few days for him to hopefully reach out when he’s ready.

Posted by LadyNeptune

Btw I’m with a Gemini man but I have the Aries moon, Taurus ven and I definitely carve out time for my friends. I need the alone space and social time with friends outside of the relationship. Way healthier that way I feel.

Ya I’ve been trying to make more friends but they’re all strippers lmao. Not good friends to have in a relationship most of the time. I’m cool w him doing that I just don’t like it when he disrespects me by blowing off without a phone call. I’m scared he’s not into me anymore to keep it real.

Posted by GemFallOut

Posted by purplehearts94

Posted by GemFallOut

Posted by purplehearts94

Posted by GemFallOut

Not a guy, but I am a Gemini with a Taurus Venus.

To be honest, arguing to a certain point is fun, then it becomes a headache. I had a relationship with an Aquarius before that was my first love and that's all we did as well. I was super crazy about him as well. Like did things for him financially that I will not most likely ever make outside of my husband ever again. I too, like your bf, went out of my way to make him happy and in a lot of ways, he was detached and nonchalant about it.

At times, yes he was caring about me, but for the most part, we fought all the time, and one day... something happened. I just didn't care anymore. He broke it off with me for the last time and I didn't go running after him. I let it go because a part of me had clocked out already. Also, apart of me wanted to see what else was out there as the fighting had worn me down.

If your Gemini hasn't come looking for you and it's been over a week in time.... with a Venus in Taurus, he may be almost clocking out. That Venus will keep me in relationships I know are dying but the loyalty it instills is tough to break.

I'm not sure what you guys are fighting about but it's time to make a decision. Either be alone or figure out what needs to change on both sides to slow the arguing down.

He’s pretty loyal to my knowledge. I just want to save my relationship. & get back to how things used to be.

I'm sure he is. It's probably time to have a real adult conversation. None of that I'm done and blocking him out as with a Gemini we will pick up the mind game and immediately know you want us to chase and most times it won't happen. I refuse to do that kind of thing now. If you want a real adult relationship you gotta start making adult moves in the direction you are trying to go.

Telling someone to leave you alone and blocking numbers is high school stuff and the opposite of what you want him to do which I come close. Don't do that to him or better yet yourself. It's only costing you in the end if your goal is to keep him.

Talk with him and not from a level if you do this wrong or you do this wrong but from a level of mutual care and love. " babe I notice and I feel like so and so.. I may be wrong.. which is why I'm bringing it to the table." It may get rough but no real conversation regarding healing isn't. I'm sure if he's retreating he feels slighted as well. Hear him out and see his side while speaking your truth. Find the middle. It's going to be ok.

Thanks for that. I’ve tried talking to him but maybe a heart to heart would be good. I’ve been trying not to argue with him anymore and we were doing good for about 2 weeks. He really hurt my feelings tho.. like I understand if you need time out but he doesn’t even tell me or let me know. Idk man. I’m gonna unblock his number and give it a few days for him to hopefully reach out when he’s ready.

You're dealing with a Gemini. Freedom is huge to us and that freedom can look different to each of us. Also.. that can change based on the mood we are in. So.. if you and him are arguing.. he wants to be free.. and he probably feels like freedom is where you won't know. He's not going to tell you.

Come to think if it.. I only tell my guy if I'm somewhere if he ask. My aqua use to throw fits about it and it would tick me off as he's not my parent but bf. Not even husband. I can go where I like whenever I like.

Also.. honestly again.. if you want to have a relationship worth having pride has got to go. You told him to leave you alone and blocked his number. He's doing just what you said. If you want something different.. you need to say that now as well. It's not fair to shift responsibility to him on contacting you when you cut off contact. Gotta start somewhere.

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Ya you’re right. But I’m always reaching out to him. To the point I feel like it’s only me really trying. & ya aqua’s can be super clingy when I’m love. I think it’s because we’re used to not caring so when we actually do it’s devastating to think about losing it knowing how hard that is to find. I want him to be happy but I also love it when he goes out of his way to make me happy. I want him to miss me. And in the past giving him space makes him try harder. I know that’s manipulative lol but when I do give him everything he does $ hit like this.

Posted by GemFallOut

To be real.... Have you guys done a love language test?

It seems like you both are having issues with quality time and money... which are two different love languages. lol, funny enough both are mine top love languages. I'm also a Gemini with a cancer moon and Taurus venus so homebody is def. me, but at the same time I can go out to parties and have fun... but then I miss my babe and want to go home to him. It's a difficult blend. I'm sure for him it's a diff. blend too.

As well, I know you touched on it and none has brought it up, so I will.... do you think even though he hasn't said anything about it, that fact that you dance bothers him? I know a couple in real life where the girl danced and that's how they met, they really did hit it off but when his feelings for her deepened and got real... he didn't want her doing that anymore, because it was "degrading" to him of how he saw her. It was just a progression of the relationship. It's weird to me, but on a logical stance, I get it. When you start dating really no feelings are involved, but as time goes on, feelings deepen and now that person is a piece of you... I don't know how my Venus in Taurus would deal with it, but honestly... I don't think I'd be down for it in the long run. Only you know the answer to this though and that's for you to know. Not something you have to explain to a forum full of strangers. 🙂

Nah I appreciate the honesty. He wants me to stop dancing & I’m hoping he doesn’t give up on me. I feel like I’m not doing my best to stop & I think he sees that, well I know he does because he brought it up. He thinks I could try harder but it’s been hard for me for some reason. Im used to it. I’m scared of being dependent on him completely. Basically if I stop dancing and get a job he’ll help me start a business and help with the bills I might not be able to pay. I wouldn’t be ok with that if I didn’t really love him & see a future. He already tells me I “need” him a little to much lol.

Sounds like you both have asked things of the other and no one is following through.

He asked you to stop dancing...you dont want to.

You asked him to go out with you more...he doesnt want to.

No one takes the other serious enough to make changes the other has asked.

Gemini ASC + Mars

Show to him that you are learning new things and love it...

Show that you are Always on the move