How can I stop this cycle?

What is the nature of your interactions/communications. In person? Online??

Also is this long distance or are you both local?

Posted by LadyNeptune
What is the nature of your interactions/communications. In person? Online??

Also is this long distance or are you both local?

We live in the same town and work at the same place. Over the years it has been both in person and through text or IM. That being said for the last year it has been mostly via text.

He asked me to go out for a drink with him on his birthday (that went over my head until the next day when he explained himself because he didn't ask very directly) and then he very directly asked me to go out with him a few days later. Both times I had obligations to my daughter and couldn't go. Then I asked him if he wanted to get together in November. He wanted to meet immediately but again I had an obligation to my daughter and I suggested another time. He said that he was afraid he would overthink it before then. I told him to let me know. That time came and went and even though we were talking regularly he never brought it up again and I didn't want to pressure him so I didn't bring it up either.

And then came a conversation that I think we both overthought and we haven't talked in a week.

Posted by Juliiette
wildatheart is an awesome movie. the only one i could swallow cage. the role was made for him. dern looks so hawt there, best body ever.

It's such an over the top ridiculous movie with the craziest dialogue and it always makes me smile. Perfect fit for both Cage and Dern.

Posted by WildatHeart

Posted by LadyNeptune
What is the nature of your interactions/communications. In person? Online??

Also is this long distance or are you both local?

We live in the same town and work at the same place. Over the years it has been both in person and through text or IM. That being said for the last year it has been mostly via text.

He asked me to go out for a drink with him on his birthday (that went over my head until the next day when he explained himself because he didn't ask very directly) and then he very directly asked me to go out with him a few days later. Both times I had obligations to my daughter and couldn't go. Then I asked him if he wanted to get together in November. He wanted to meet immediately but again I had an obligation to my daughter and I suggested another time. He said that he was afraid he would overthink it before then. I told him to let me know. That time came and went and even though we were talking regularly he never brought it up again and I didn't want to pressure him so I didn't bring it up either.

And then came a conversation that I think we both overthought and we haven't talked in a week.

click to expand

If it hasn't happened in 7 years and you are in the same town/state whatever...then he just isn't that into you. Sorry but dudes go after what they want. I suspect you've been looking at him as a backup plan and he at you.

Cut out the comfortably familiarity and open yourself up to something new.

exactly. now i will read your post.





I would very much appreciate that. I am driving myself crazy with this today.

Posted by WildatHeart
Here's the situation that has been going on for 7 years - signs involved

Sun/Moon Virgo, Venus Libra, Mars in Cancer

Sun Cancer, Moon Cap, Venus Virgo, Mars in Taurus

There are definite feelings on both sides but we both overanalyze everything and then get stuck in our own heads and it creates problems. For the first year or so it was just a friendship and we talked daily, but as soon as feelings became involved and were shared it got weird. At the time neither of us was looking for, expecting or even wanting a relationship so we were kind of blindsided by the whole thing. And thus the cycle began:

both of us share intimate feelings, things are going along beautifully and then one of us (person A) says something that makes the other (person B) go into overthinking mode and disappear. Person A has no idea this has happened, they continue to try to communicate. Person B is either non-responsive (if through text), or suddenly becomes really flippant about their feelings if in person. Then Person A becomes flippant - suddenly things are said that are completely inconsistent with the way either of them actually feels until all conversation ceases for a period of time. That period of time may be a couple of hours but it has been as long as six months.

But always, always, without fail we miss each other like crazy and one of us shows up acting like nothing ever happened and we fall right back into the beautiful and intimate interactions.

I know he cares about me always, even when we aren't talking.

I care about him always, even when we aren't talking.

So if you have been in this situation, if you have one of these placements, if you understand what I'm saying I'd like some input. How do I stop this cycle and keep things moving forward at a steady pace.

Looks plutonic relationship. Check Pluto's in your synastry. If so, it's very difficult to stabilise. Both of you must be aware of what's going on and both of you need to adjust. Though shit

Posted by RooSagicorn
Do you both mirror each other?

My boyfriend is a Virgo Moon, my ex husband Cap moon. Oh my! I can imagine the communication problems.

Somebody has to decide not to back up but go forward even when they want to backup. Otherwise, you will keep missing each other instead of truly connecting. The fact you keep coming back says something. Someone needs to step up though. I think if one does, the other will follow.

We have made huge strides in our communication and actually discussing where we are in our lives and how we feel and the possibility of moving forward. We aren't there yet though and I definitely still hold back, sometimes his expression of his feelings actually takes me by surprise and as soon as I pull back to analyze something he starts to wonder if he cares more than I do and he pulls way back. When he pulls back my instinct is to pull back. I've been trying to really pay attention to that this last few months and not let it happen. But...it kind of slipped through this time.

I was busy analyzing a question that he asked that I wasn't sure how to answer and wondering if I even understood the question when I answered it. By the time I sorted through that it had been almost a week and when I reached out to check in on him he didn't respond. So I'm currently in the "just be patient, he'll be back when he's done being in his head." But I know that just sets us back every time.

You are right, someone needs to step up and I am probably the one who is less afraid of getting hurt so it's probably going to have to be me.

If it hasn't happened in 7 years and you are in the same town/state whatever...then he just isn't that into you. Sorry but dudes go after what they want. I suspect you've been looking at him as a backup plan and he at you.

Cut out the comfortably familiarity and open yourself up to something new.

I do appreciate your concern and advice, and I always respect your honesty in threads but in this instance I am going to have to disagree at least in part. This is definitely not a case of "he's not that into you", I have no doubt about how he feels. What holds me back is that I will change my life to let him in and it won't work out. Been there, done that...don't need anymore sad t-shirts.

Do you guys have any power struggle, jealousy as well, sneaky way of controlling?

Posted by Sheever

Posted by WildatHeart
Here's the situation that has been going on for 7 years - signs involved

Sun/Moon Virgo, Venus Libra, Mars in Cancer

Sun Cancer, Moon Cap, Venus Virgo, Mars in Taurus

There are definite feelings on both sides but we both overanalyze everything and then get stuck in our own heads and it creates problems. For the first year or so it was just a friendship and we talked daily, but as soon as feelings became involved and were shared it got weird. At the time neither of us was looking for, expecting or even wanting a relationship so we were kind of blindsided by the whole thing. And thus the cycle began:

both of us share intimate feelings, things are going along beautifully and then one of us (person A) says something that makes the other (person B) go into overthinking mode and disappear. Person A has no idea this has happened, they continue to try to communicate. Person B is either non-responsive (if through text), or suddenly becomes really flippant about their feelings if in person. Then Person A becomes flippant - suddenly things are said that are completely inconsistent with the way either of them actually feels until all conversation ceases for a period of time. That period of time may be a couple of hours but it has been as long as six months.

But always, always, without fail we miss each other like crazy and one of us shows up acting like nothing ever happened and we fall right back into the beautiful and intimate interactions.

I know he cares about me always, even when we aren't talking.

I care about him always, even when we aren't talking.

So if you have been in this situation, if you have one of these placements, if you understand what I'm saying I'd like some input. How do I stop this cycle and keep things moving forward at a steady pace.

Looks plutonic relationship. Check Pluto's in your synastry. If so, it's very difficult to stabilise. Both of you must be aware of what's going on and both of you need to adjust. Though shit

click to expand

I don't understand the Pluto thing - but we both have Pluto in Libra 12 degrees apart

Posted by RooSagicorn

Posted by WildatHeart

Posted by RooSagicorn
Do you both mirror each other?

My boyfriend is a Virgo Moon, my ex husband Cap moon. Oh my! I can imagine the communication problems.

Somebody has to decide not to back up but go forward even when they want to backup. Otherwise, you will keep missing each other instead of truly connecting. The fact you keep coming back says something. Someone needs to step up though. I think if one does, the other will follow.

We have made huge strides in our communication and actually discussing where we are in our lives and how we feel and the possibility of moving forward. We aren't there yet though and I definitely still hold back, sometimes his expression of his feelings actually takes me by surprise and as soon as I pull back to analyze something he starts to wonder if he cares more than I do and he pulls way back. When he pulls back my instinct is to pull back. I've been trying to really pay attention to that this last few months and not let it happen. But...it kind of slipped through this time.

I was busy analyzing a question that he asked that I wasn't sure how to answer and wondering if I even understood the question when I answered it. By the time I sorted through that it had been almost a week and when I reached out to check in on him he didn't respond. So I'm currently in the "just be patient, he'll be back when he's done being in his head." But I know that just sets us back every time.

You are right, someone needs to step up and I am probably the one who is less afraid of getting hurt so it's probably going to have to be me.

I’m an aqua moon & my bf & i have the same problem. Someone advised me to do this & said it would have to be me. So I’ve been trying more not to back up when I’m not sure.. and actually reach out, ask the question instead of analyzing it. It really has been helping. 🙂

Are you the Cap moon or Virgo Moon?

click to expand

I'm the Cap moon, and now that you say that it makes sense. The only time we have problems is when I am not willing to "bother" him by asking for clarification on a question or a statement. I am way to old to be this lame honestly.

Posted by WildatHeart

Posted by Sheever

Posted by WildatHeart
Here's the situation that has been going on for 7 years - signs involved

Sun/Moon Virgo, Venus Libra, Mars in Cancer

Sun Cancer, Moon Cap, Venus Virgo, Mars in Taurus

There are definite feelings on both sides but we both overanalyze everything and then get stuck in our own heads and it creates problems. For the first year or so it was just a friendship and we talked daily, but as soon as feelings became involved and were shared it got weird. At the time neither of us was looking for, expecting or even wanting a relationship so we were kind of blindsided by the whole thing. And thus the cycle began:

both of us share intimate feelings, things are going along beautifully and then one of us (person A) says something that makes the other (person B) go into overthinking mode and disappear. Person A has no idea this has happened, they continue to try to communicate. Person B is either non-responsive (if through text), or suddenly becomes really flippant about their feelings if in person. Then Person A becomes flippant - suddenly things are said that are completely inconsistent with the way either of them actually feels until all conversation ceases for a period of time. That period of time may be a couple of hours but it has been as long as six months.

But always, always, without fail we miss each other like crazy and one of us shows up acting like nothing ever happened and we fall right back into the beautiful and intimate interactions.

I know he cares about me always, even when we aren't talking.

I care about him always, even when we aren't talking.

So if you have been in this situation, if you have one of these placements, if you understand what I'm saying I'd like some input. How do I stop this cycle and keep things moving forward at a steady pace.

Looks plutonic relationship. Check Pluto's in your synastry. If so, it's very difficult to stabilise. Both of you must be aware of what's going on and both of you need to adjust. Though shit

I don't understand the Pluto thing - but we both have Pluto in Libra 12 degrees apart

click to expand

It takes some time to dig, but can give you some clue. You have to do a synastry chart of you as a couple. By looking at the chart, check the pluto contacts of each side and what. Then look up on the Internet from various sources what those connections looks like.

Posted by RooSagicorn

Posted by WildatHeart

If it hasn't happened in 7 years and you are in the same town/state whatever...then he just isn't that into you. Sorry but dudes go after what they want. I suspect you've been looking at him as a backup plan and he at you.

Cut out the comfortably familiarity and open yourself up to something new.

I do appreciate your concern and advice, and I always respect your honesty in threads but in this instance I am going to have to disagree at least in part. This is definitely not a case of "he's not that into you", I have no doubt about how he feels. What holds me back is that I will change my life to let him in and it won't work out. Been there, done that...don't need anymore sad t-shirts.

Omg. I had the same issue. Well at some point, you have to take the risk or it will not happen. Your choice.

click to expand

I think we are around the same age from other posts I've read. Early 40's? Once you've been through a ridiculously long relationship that you thought was the one it's hard not to question everything going into the next one. I guess eventually you just have to jump in and hope you know how to swim.

Posted by Sheever

Posted by WildatHeart

Posted by Sheever

Posted by WildatHeart
Here's the situation that has been going on for 7 years - signs involved

Sun/Moon Virgo, Venus Libra, Mars in Cancer

Sun Cancer, Moon Cap, Venus Virgo, Mars in Taurus

There are definite feelings on both sides but we both overanalyze everything and then get stuck in our own heads and it creates problems. For the first year or so it was just a friendship and we talked daily, but as soon as feelings became involved and were shared it got weird. At the time neither of us was looking for, expecting or even wanting a relationship so we were kind of blindsided by the whole thing. And thus the cycle began:

both of us share intimate feelings, things are going along beautifully and then one of us (person A) says something that makes the other (person B) go into overthinking mode and disappear. Person A has no idea this has happened, they continue to try to communicate. Person B is either non-responsive (if through text), or suddenly becomes really flippant about their feelings if in person. Then Person A becomes flippant - suddenly things are said that are completely inconsistent with the way either of them actually feels until all conversation ceases for a period of time. That period of time may be a couple of hours but it has been as long as six months.

But always, always, without fail we miss each other like crazy and one of us shows up acting like nothing ever happened and we fall right back into the beautiful and intimate interactions.

I know he cares about me always, even when we aren't talking.

I care about him always, even when we aren't talking.

So if you have been in this situation, if you have one of these placements, if you understand what I'm saying I'd like some input. How do I stop this cycle and keep things moving forward at a steady pace.

Looks plutonic relationship. Check Pluto's in your synastry. If so, it's very difficult to stabilise. Both of you must be aware of what's going on and both of you need to adjust. Though shit

I don't understand the Pluto thing - but we both have Pluto in Libra 12 degrees apart

It takes some time to dig, but can give you some clue. You have to do a synastry chart of you as a couple. By looking at the chart, check the pluto contacts of each side and what. Then look up on the Internet from various sources what those connections looks like.

click to expand

Thank you, I will do that

Posted by Sheever
Do you guys have any power struggle, jealousy as well, sneaky way of controlling?

I think initially there was a definite desire for each of us to manipulate the situation so that we were in control. I don't have any jealousy, if he does he isn't visibly displaying it.

Posted by WildatHeart

If it hasn't happened in 7 years and you are in the same town/state whatever...then he just isn't that into you. Sorry but dudes go after what they want. I suspect you've been looking at him as a backup plan and he at you.

Cut out the comfortably familiarity and open yourself up to something new.

I do appreciate your concern and advice, and I always respect your honesty in threads but in this instance I am going to have to disagree at least in part. This is definitely not a case of "he's not that into you", I have no doubt about how he feels. What holds me back is that I will change my life to let him in and it won't work out. Been there, done that...don't need anymore sad t-shirts.

click to expand

Sorry but its already changed your life. You've been holding onto this for the last 7 years.

How much more time and energy are you going to give him?

Posted by Juliiette
Sun/Moon Virgo, Venus Libra, Mars in Cancer

Sun Cancer, Moon Cap, Venus Virgo, Mars in Taurus

ok astrology wise, though i'm far from an expert i get the connection and the pulling back. sex is awesome? like out of this world if you don't talk. i mean dirty talk doesn't count lol.

anyway i hate to say it and i might be wrong but you are not right for each other. none of you is going to push forward. or if someone can, that should be you. but that cap moon you have is very restrictive. for a cancer. try to use your cardinal traits. but i def mean it's on you.

We have never slept together, the chemistry is insane though. Part of why we are avoiding each other right now is because we know that in the place we have gotten to recently, with all of the secrets out there is no way we are going to hang out without something physical taking place. I think for both of us that is kind of the point of no return.

When you say astrologically speaking we are not right for each other is that purely because you don't think either one of us can step up and make this happen? Or are there other indications?

Posted by RooSagicorn

Posted by WildatHeart

Posted by RooSagicorn

Posted by WildatHeart

If it hasn't happened in 7 years and you are in the same town/state whatever...then he just isn't that into you. Sorry but dudes go after what they want. I suspect you've been looking at him as a backup plan and he at you.

Cut out the comfortably familiarity and open yourself up to something new.

I do appreciate your concern and advice, and I always respect your honesty in threads but in this instance I am going to have to disagree at least in part. This is definitely not a case of "he's not that into you", I have no doubt about how he feels. What holds me back is that I will change my life to let him in and it won't work out. Been there, done that...don't need anymore sad t-shirts.

Omg. I had the same issue. Well at some point, you have to take the risk or it will not happen. Your choice.

I think we are around the same age from other posts I've read. Early 40's? Once you've been through a ridiculously long relationship that you thought was the one it's hard not to question everything going into the next one. I guess eventually you just have to jump in and hope you know how to swim.

Ha! I’m older. 53. But yes that’s exactly the problem. You have to jump in if it looks right. It’s hard. My Virgo Moon & I have done a lot of starts and stops but we are in a good place now. So when he started backtracking recently I realized I need to make sure he gets where I’m at. So no more backing up if I am feeling unsure about something.. ask the question, reach out anyway. For god’s sake, he’s planning the damn future I can do my part. 🙂

click to expand

And he is receptive to that? I have a Cap moon so I am really good at holding back. I am always afraid if I let the Cancer side take over and really show how I feel it'll scare him. I know he's the Virgo but my feelings always seem to come off as the more logical ones even when I'm bouncing around like a 12 year old girl in love on the inside.

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by WildatHeart

If it hasn't happened in 7 years and you are in the same town/state whatever...then he just isn't that into you. Sorry but dudes go after what they want. I suspect you've been looking at him as a backup plan and he at you.

Cut out the comfortably familiarity and open yourself up to something new.

I do appreciate your concern and advice, and I always respect your honesty in threads but in this instance I am going to have to disagree at least in part. This is definitely not a case of "he's not that into you", I have no doubt about how he feels. What holds me back is that I will change my life to let him in and it won't work out. Been there, done that...don't need anymore sad t-shirts.

Sorry but its already changed your life. You've been holding onto this for the last 7 years.

How much more time and energy are you going to give him?

click to expand

I suppose just as much time and energy as he continues to give me.

Posted by Juliiette

Posted by WildatHeart

Posted by Juliiette
Sun/Moon Virgo, Venus Libra, Mars in Cancer

Sun Cancer, Moon Cap, Venus Virgo, Mars in Taurus

ok astrology wise, though i'm far from an expert i get the connection and the pulling back. sex is awesome? like out of this world if you don't talk. i mean dirty talk doesn't count lol.

anyway i hate to say it and i might be wrong but you are not right for each other. none of you is going to push forward. or if someone can, that should be you. but that cap moon you have is very restrictive. for a cancer. try to use your cardinal traits. but i def mean it's on you.

When you say astrologically speaking we are not right for each other is that purely because you don't think either one of us can step up and make this happen? Or are there other indications?

yes. but if anyone has astro indications to step forward it's you.

Sun/Moon Virgo, Venus Libra, Mars in Cancer

Sun Cancer, Moon Cap, Venus Virgo, Mars in Taurus

again: his sun and your venus, your sun and his mars, maybe conjunctions, probably, which are intense aspects. and those trines. i say make the first move and be done with it, or grow out of it. my 2 cents.

click to expand

Seems to be the common consensus 🙂

Posted by WildatHeart

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by WildatHeart

If it hasn't happened in 7 years and you are in the same town/state whatever...then he just isn't that into you. Sorry but dudes go after what they want. I suspect you've been looking at him as a backup plan and he at you.

Cut out the comfortably familiarity and open yourself up to something new.

I do appreciate your concern and advice, and I always respect your honesty in threads but in this instance I am going to have to disagree at least in part. This is definitely not a case of "he's not that into you", I have no doubt about how he feels. What holds me back is that I will change my life to let him in and it won't work out. Been there, done that...don't need anymore sad t-shirts.

Sorry but its already changed your life. You've been holding onto this for the last 7 years.

How much more time and energy are you going to give him?

I suppose just as much time and energy as he continues to give me.

click to expand

So your thread title "How do I stop this cycle?"....the way you stop it is to tell him good luck and good bye and go no contact.

But its sounding like thats not what you really want...

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by WildatHeart

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by WildatHeart

If it hasn't happened in 7 years and you are in the same town/state whatever...then he just isn't that into you. Sorry but dudes go after what they want. I suspect you've been looking at him as a backup plan and he at you.

Cut out the comfortably familiarity and open yourself up to something new.

I do appreciate your concern and advice, and I always respect your honesty in threads but in this instance I am going to have to disagree at least in part. This is definitely not a case of "he's not that into you", I have no doubt about how he feels. What holds me back is that I will change my life to let him in and it won't work out. Been there, done that...don't need anymore sad t-shirts.

Sorry but its already changed your life. You've been holding onto this for the last 7 years.

How much more time and energy are you going to give him?

I suppose just as much time and energy as he continues to give me.

So your thread title "How do I stop this cycle?"....the way you stop it is to tell him good luck and good bye and go no contact.

But its sounding like thats not what you really want...

click to expand

I understand that this is something you would not allow to continue in your life. Thank you for providing a differing opinion. I hear what you are saying but I am not willing to end things because it will only leave me with regrets. As you stated I have invested a lot of time and energy into this and so has he, we've both tried the saying goodbye and good luck option only to spend months miserably waiting for someone to break down and reach out. Someone always does. Which really only leaves the options of jumping all of the way in or continuing the cycle indefinitely. If I jump in and it doesn't work out, then I will take your advice and walk away from it without regrets.

Posted by Juliiette

Posted by WildatHeart

Posted by Juliiette

Posted by WildatHeart

Posted by Juliiette
Sun/Moon Virgo, Venus Libra, Mars in Cancer

Sun Cancer, Moon Cap, Venus Virgo, Mars in Taurus

ok astrology wise, though i'm far from an expert i get the connection and the pulling back. sex is awesome? like out of this world if you don't talk. i mean dirty talk doesn't count lol.

anyway i hate to say it and i might be wrong but you are not right for each other. none of you is going to push forward. or if someone can, that should be you. but that cap moon you have is very restrictive. for a cancer. try to use your cardinal traits. but i def mean it's on you.

When you say astrologically speaking we are not right for each other is that purely because you don't think either one of us can step up and make this happen? Or are there other indications?

yes. but if anyone has astro indications to step forward it's you.

Sun/Moon Virgo, Venus Libra, Mars in Cancer

Sun Cancer, Moon Cap, Venus Virgo, Mars in Taurus

again: his sun and your venus, your sun and his mars, maybe conjunctions, probably, which are intense aspects. and those trines. i say make the first move and be done with it, or grow out of it. my 2 cents.

Seems to be the common consensus 🙂

i haven't read the other responses. we have this girl who had a "dance" with a virgo for far too long. cancer as well. i'm not sure should we summon her. @ladyneptune what you think?

click to expand

Was it CC? Because I watched that whole thing go down 5 years ago.

Posted by RooSagicorn

Posted by WildatHeart

Posted by RooSagicorn

Posted by WildatHeart

Posted by RooSagicorn

Posted by WildatHeart

If it hasn't happened in 7 years and you are in the same town/state whatever...then he just isn't that into you. Sorry but dudes go after what they want. I suspect you've been looking at him as a backup plan and he at you.

Cut out the comfortably familiarity and open yourself up to something new.

I do appreciate your concern and advice, and I always respect your honesty in threads but in this instance I am going to have to disagree at least in part. This is definitely not a case of "he's not that into you", I have no doubt about how he feels. What holds me back is that I will change my life to let him in and it won't work out. Been there, done that...don't need anymore sad t-shirts.

Omg. I had the same issue. Well at some point, you have to take the risk or it will not happen. Your choice.

I think we are around the same age from other posts I've read. Early 40's? Once you've been through a ridiculously long relationship that you thought was the one it's hard not to question everything going into the next one. I guess eventually you just have to jump in and hope you know how to swim.

Ha! I’m older. 53. But yes that’s exactly the problem. You have to jump in if it looks right. It’s hard. My Virgo Moon & I have done a lot of starts and stops but we are in a good place now. So when he started backtracking recently I realized I need to make sure he gets where I’m at. So no more backing up if I am feeling unsure about something.. ask the question, reach out anyway. For god’s sake, he’s planning the damn future I can do my part. 🙂

And he is receptive to that? I have a Cap moon so I am really good at holding back. I am always afraid if I let the Cancer side take over and really show how I feel it'll scare him. I know he's the Virgo but my feelings always seem to come off as the more logical ones even when I'm bouncing around like a 12 year old girl in love on the inside.

Well he’s receptive because I’m the one holding back & he is the one who tells me he loves me first. So when I hold back, he thinks I don’t love him too. We’ve been together 11 months as bf/gf though. But had a break for 3 months after 8 months due to this. I don’t mean you have to tell him all your feelings, just ask the question & reach out instead of analyzing. More attention instead of backing up will send the message. I’m guessing he is mirroring your back ups. So take that problem away.

click to expand

Good advice, thank you!

Posted by greylatern
I am a venus in libra with maturity jealous doesn't exist. Since your not together he has no right to be so he will not. He will mirror and tit for tat. I still working to understand caps and cap placements but the rest I understand. So after reading this whole thread and being a virgo sun and libra venus I going to tell you this. Stop fucking around and take the leap. It is only a matter of time until one of you gets swooped and the others gets their heart destroyed. If he is like me which is practial and emotional then if he loves you and it has been this long he will assume your not interested so he is taking what he can get. Mental, emotional, and you feel the passion too? It can't be in your head. What does your heart and intuition say?

7 years is a long time to be holding this. Stop hurting each other!

My heart and my intuition are definitely telling me to keep moving forward. It's my head that causes all of the problems.

Posted by CaramelizedCoffee
WAY too much EARTH "WildatHeart

Cancer Sun/Mercury, Cap Moon, Virgo Venus, Mars Taurus"



you really need to use your Cancer Sun more

fuking Slow poke azz

just wasting time...

That is exactly what I was just thinking, CC. I turned off all of that Cancer energy a really long time ago, it's so outwardly controlled now that it's just become 2nd nature. New Years resolution. Move the fuck forward and if it doesn't work out I can move the fuck on. It won't kill me to find out one way or another.

Posted by CaramelizedCoffee

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by WildatHeart

Posted by LadyNeptune
What is the nature of your interactions/communications. In person? Online??

Also is this long distance or are you both local?

We live in the same town and work at the same place. Over the years it has been both in person and through text or IM. That being said for the last year it has been mostly via text.

He asked me to go out for a drink with him on his birthday (that went over my head until the next day when he explained himself because he didn't ask very directly) and then he very directly asked me to go out with him a few days later. Both times I had obligations to my daughter and couldn't go. Then I asked him if he wanted to get together in November. He wanted to meet immediately but again I had an obligation to my daughter and I suggested another time. He said that he was afraid he would overthink it before then. I told him to let me know. That time came and went and even though we were talking regularly he never brought it up again and I didn't want to pressure him so I didn't bring it up either.

And then came a conversation that I think we both overthought and we haven't talked in a week.

If it hasn't happened in 7 years and you are in the same town/state whatever...then he just isn't that into you. Sorry but dudes go after what they want. I suspect you've been looking at him as a backup plan and he at you.

Cut out the comfortably familiarity and open yourself up to something new.

lol you're crazy, stop giving people advice please

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Why?

Update: In case you were wondering. I have completely forgotten how to use my Cancer bits, basically just did the same thing again.