After months. One word text.

My Cancer lady whom I previously wrote about finally texted me. After months. She moved out and hasn't spoken to me in many months. I have tried everything but to no avail.

We were together for years.

Finally tonight she texted me one word. "Hi"

I was at a loss for words. All I could say back was "Hi"

Haven't heard from her since.

Will she come back?

Can I ask what exactly happened between you two?

Possibly, what were the circumstances of the breakup?

Posted by Chuckcem
Possibly, what were the circumstances of the breakup?

She wanted to have an open relationship and I completely lost it. We got in a huge screaming match, and I called her names and accused her of cheating. So she left. I tried everything but she refused to speak to me. I think I traumatized her fragile spirit with my outlandish reaction.

I still can't accept an open relationship. I was just hurt and didn't know where her request was coming from. I let my temper get the better of me.

Posted by Earthgoddess

Posted by Thatgayal

Posted by Chuckcem
Possibly, what were the circumstances of the breakup?

She wanted to have an open relationship and I completely lost it. We got in a huge screaming match, and I called her names and accused her of cheating. So she left. I tried everything but she refused to speak to me. I think I traumatized her fragile spirit with my outlandish reaction.

I still can't accept an open relationship. I was just hurt and didn't know where her request was coming from. I let my temper get the better of me.

The question should be do u want her to come back?

Like really

click to expand

I want to understand her and her request. I need to understand. I also feel sorry for my reaction.

@Thatgayal Oh, that's not good. First, never "lose it". You're the man, you're the one who is supposed to be emotionally centered. Losing your cool and getting into a screaming match with your lady just shows that she can rattle your cage.

Women who are looking for an emotionally stable man will lose confidence if a man can't control his emotions. Some people feel that you must yell to appear strong. This simply isn't the case. True strength comes from being able to keep things steady, even in moments of duress. By screaming at her you showed your breaking point, which brings me to my next point...

This could have all been a test. Women will sometimes throw things out there to see how you handle it. They want to know that their men can handle anything. The more confident they are in you, the less they test and the easier the tests become. However if a woman knows she can rile you up easily, she'll continue to test and rock the boat.

Don't get me wrong, it's possible the Cancer woman actually wanted an open relationship. It's also possible she was toying with the idea to see how you'd respond. Regardless, you failed that test either way. As a Leo I can understand how you would feel insulted by receiving such a request. In a Leo relationship, there's no room for a third party. However the way you respond to situations like this is everything.

The best thing to do would have been to ask, "What do you mean?" Once she explained what she wanted, you could have responded, "Look, that makes me uncomfortable so I unfortunately I can't agree to that. I'm not looking to add an additonal person to this relationship." If she persisted then you could put your foot down by saying, "Hey if that's what you truly want, then it won't be with me. I care about you, but I'm not cool with that. So let me know if you change your mind, but I need to find someone who wants to be with only me." Then leave it at that. There's no need to scream or make threats.

By remaining calm and secure, you flip the tables and boost your value in her eyes. No woman (in fact no person) wants to miss out on a good thing. A woman must know that if she pushes to far, you will walk. She must know someone else could possibly reap the benefit of her letting you go. So it's up to you to set your boundaries. A man without boundaries, is not a man a woman can respect. If she can't respect you, then she definitely can't love you.

My guess is the Cancer woman was already losing attraction for you, but you didn't notice. Cancers definitely need Need NEED to feel emotionally secure with their partners. Her request to open up the relationship may have been her way of saying, "I don't feel emotionally secure with you, so I want to keep my options open." She probably felt like things were starting to go south with you, but didn't want to give up just yet in case it turned around. When you screamed at her though, you showed that you didn't understand her at all. As a result she no logner felt safe with you.

So what do you do? Well my first bit of advice is to find another woman. The relationship essentially ended when she moved out and stopped talking to you. So it's time to remove your focus from her. IF she decides to come back, she'll test the waters first (by small sending texts). Let her initiate communication and come back to you at her own speed. You've already seen the results when you've tried contacting her. Getting in touch needs to be her decision.

However just know that if you two reconcile, it's possible that she may still want an open relationship. So the real question is, is that what YOU want? Will it be worth getting her back knowing that information. Make sure that you don't get so wrapped up in reattracting her, that you don't consider the reality of the situation.

I'm a cancer woman and let me tell you an open relationship is NEVER something we want.. If my bf came up to me with that request blood will be shed 😂.. No joke though he wouldn't be my bf anymore.. Its betrayal