Cancer boyfriend won't introduce me to his family

Hey, you guys were totally great in helping me out before. I was hoping someone could shed some light on a little problem I'm having.

I'm a Pisces and I've been seeing this great guy for about 5 months now. Things are going great, and I couldn't be happier with him - I stay at his place like every night and he's told me he loves me. This honestly is the deepest I've ever fallen for someone in my life. (I'm 28, he's 29)

Anyway, about 2 months ago his sister and brother came to town and I couldn't stay over because they were and he'd have no space. I didn't push the envelope, but he made no effort to introduce me, saying that he "didn't think it was all that important". When I came back to his place after they left I saw he'd hidden my toothbrush and dvds and stuff.

Now his sister is coming up again in 2 weeks, and he's already told me he doesn't want me to stay over that weekend because "it's a loft apt and I wouldn't want it to be awkward that we'd be in the same bed and she'd be on the couch."

What should I do? I feel really hurt by this. Do you think he doesn't really love me, or is ashamed of me or something? Isn't this really, really weird for a Cancer? Or am I just having a Pisces panic over nothing?

Just for the record I don't think he's cheating or just using me for sex - if he was I don't think we would have lasted 5 months.

People like you are scary because you wrap your whole world around a person and then you freak out from insecurity when things dont go your way. That is not healthy. You are way too clingy. Sleep in your bed at night and get a life.

No offense but ^^GP is totally right.

i do agree with both of them but it does seem important to u to meet his family. have u expressed an interest in wanting to meet them or is it only because u think this is appropriate from what u read about his sign?

i think ur reading too much into it personally. i would just ask him straight up but that's just me. maybe his family are hard core religious and if they saw any of that stuff, or u sleeping over, they'd flip out on him or something. maybe they're ultra nosey and he just doesn't wanna deal with it. who knows? besides, it's only been 5 months. maybe that cancerian part of him wants to wait til he is sure u guys are going in for the long haul.

That seems fishy, no introductions, hiding your things..Why hide things from family?

No offense but if he's not introducing you to his friends and family he is not all that serious about you, I might be wrong for saying this but there is a is chance that woman is not his sister, she is someone he's most likely having an intimate relationship with. Your too in love to believe he's capable so I'm sure your not going to agree but 2 weeks and you did not get introduced and now here she is coming back into town again and still no introduction of you as his girlfriend...sounds like a cheater to me.

It could be many different reasons but in all honesty it does sound pretty weird. Usually if not for anything else a man wants to "show off or show" his little doll off to friends first then fam. ESP a cancer man from what i've noticed. The thing that stands out most is...he was HIDING your stuff. Listen it's one thing for him not to be ready to do that and you shouldn't take it to heart BUT hiding your things too?..... I'm sorry that has shady all over it.

I don't think it's about being judgemental....When mostly everyone comes up with the same conclusion. The family part was okay he's just not ready he told her what he felt about it and thats that, But please tell me whos going to hide stuff after 5 months into a relationship & you can honestly say you wouldn't have any suspicion?

Hiding your things is a little strange, I agree. I can understand him not wanting to introduce you to the family just yet, some people like to wait, especially those who really cherish their family and respect their opinions. Meeting the family is serious business, really. I guess the part I don't understand is that he's trying to make it look like you don't exist when his family is around.

You shouldn't over think it, though. Instead of stewing, just ASK him. I mean, why sit there and feel uncomfortable with a situation? If you're not comfortable asking him to be truthful about it, then you probably shouldn't be in this relationship.

I agree with ninjamu and CC; just be bold and ask the guy upfront about it, if it concerns you a lot.

You got to remember just cuz he's a cancer doesn't mean he has the average cancerian traits that everyone likes to depict on this website.

Every single individual is different, no matter what sign they seem to fall under.

Juicy is right too, don't be stressin just cuz he hasn't introduced you yet. Family person is a true cancerian trait, so his family is very important. And introducing you to them is a huge ass step. Its only been 5months, you'll meet them in due time.

Personally, I won't even think about introducing my girlfriend to my family until I'm quite cetain she's the girl for me. Normally that's a long time. Longer than 5 months lol.

But its no thing, don't be worrying so much.

Firefox, I read some of your posts before this one. This man has told you UPFRONT that he does not want the same thing that you want with him. In my own personal opinion, I stated that you are just hanging around for the string along ride.

He told you he didn't want marriage or a family. He is not hiding anything from you. He is not a cheater, he is not a liar, he is being himself. The man who told you he was not ready. In your mind, you have made up a relationship with this man that is imaginary. Just because he allows you to sleep over his house alot does not mean that he is in love with you. He wants sex. Love and sex don't mean the same thing to a man. Some men can relate love with sex but not in all cases.

Don't put any thought into it, don't stress it, just go and BOLDLY confront this man and I am willing to bet that he will say, hey, I told you upfront that I did not want to get married. He warned you already and stated to you that if you stick around with him, you are doing it at your own risk.

Given this guy's relationship history he may be scared of telling his family he is dating ANYONE - hence hiding your things if he hasn't even told them he's seeing anyone let alone who - he may not want them asking questions just yet. Since he has had bad experiences in the past it may be that introducing someone to his family has gotten complicated for him, especially when the relationship is over - he could see introducing you to his family as the begining of the end. It may just be a superstition - or he could even just be enjoying keeping you to himself for now. His behavior does not indicate anything one way or the other to be honest and the only way you are going to know for sure is to ask him about it. Don't be confrontational just say "Hey, I would love to meet your family sometime and was wondering why all the secrecy?" Don't be pushy or accusatory - give him a chance to explain himself before jumping to conclusions.

I met my cancer man late winter and he brought me to meet the family in the summer to his homeland.
I guess it depends on how cancer sees the relationship, if he can trust you with his whole heart, not to play the field with him etc ;
I remember having numerous conversations/heavy discussions about it every now and then
because cancer man MUST know if I was innit for the long run at the time, which I was and still am.
I came to realise that by letting me meet his family, is his way to show how serious he is with me.


Perhaps you at the time didnt show him how serious you were w him cos I think cancer can sense that by themselves

I Am sooooo guilty of this. I JUST got out of a relationship. I was with a man 4 years. 2Mo afterwards i started dating a guy i was very serious about, and still am. When my mom would come over i would make him HIDE! I didnt want my family to jdg him and start to judge me, because i oved him somuch, that if my family was disapointed with me and just gave him the cold shoulder over me moving to quick. I would of left him. Were sill together and now my family loves him. Of course i am with an Aries Man, they are very nderstandng and down to earth. LoL

I don't introduce people quickly to my family either. You need to get the most important approval mine, and I have to determine where we stand. It takes a long time of observation for me to feel secure of someone.

Well you can look at this many different ways. 1. You might have to face the possibility that him not willing/wanting to introduce you to his family could symbolize his lack of love for you or how he really feels about the intensity of the relationship. The fact that he HID your things means that he's literally wanting to "hide you" vs. the excuse he gave you about space. Your things being where they were in his apartment weren't gonna take up any space for his family. So if I were you, I'd be more concerned about what he DID with your stuff & how he handled that situation vs. him actually not yet being comfortable introducing you to his family. You've only been together 5 months & to some people this is not long enough. If his reasoning for not introducing you to his family yet stem from him just wanting to make sure you two will last, then I have all the respect for him for having that mindset. Regardless of him being a Cancer or not, this guy might have a very strong bond with his siblings & thus might really care for their opinions. He might not want to hear or be ready for any possible criticism from them until he's 100% sure that you're the right one for him. Just b/c he spends time with you everyday doesn't mean that he loves you. Hell, nowadays, even enemies spend more time with eachother than they do with the people they like/love. This guy may like/love you BUT may not be as into you or invested in you the way that you are with/to him. Does his family even know about you? Plus, who knows, this guy might have a really judgmental family & his way of keeping you from any hurt or criticism might be way of him literally keeping you from that. Just focus on your relationship with him right now b/c at the end of the day, you're with him and not his family. If you two had been together a year or longer & yet he still hadn't introduced you to his family, then that'd be a whole 'nother story b/c clearly by that time, someone should know whether or not if they can see themselves being with that person long-term. But relax, you two have only been together less than 6 months. If he stopped hanging out with you, THEN you'd have a concern, but he didn't so relax. Perhaps, you should tell him how you really feel like you did with us on Dxp & demand that he be 100% upfront & honest with you.

Also, understand that how he perceives you may not be the way that his family, after just meeting you will. Remember, he's gotten the chance to get to know you & it's taken time for him to notice all of the sweet things about you. BUT his family might be a different story. They may be very judgmental or might have strong opinions (which he deeply cares for and/or takes into consideration) about the subject of 2 people living together. If his family doesn't even know about you then that will clearly make more sense as to why he didn't want them to meet you under the circumstances that you're living with him. Think about it. If you didn't tell your family about the guy you were dating, the LAST way you'd want them to meet him is by way of them coming over & finding out about him b/c they didn't have a choice. What happend to a man bringing a woman TO his family? Or a people bringing their partner over to their familie's house with the sole purpose of meeting that person's family? Depending on what kind of family he has, it may not be the smartest idea for them to arrive & be suprised & not even know who the hell you are. He may not be ready to tell his family about you OR he may not be ready to admit to them that you 2 have basically moved in together. After all, alot of people would disapprove of 2 people moving so fast before the 6 month mark. My moon is in Cancer & I will say that I am VERY careful about who I bring home. 1. B/c I don't want to face any harsh criticism or have to hear about how everyone else feels until I fully know how I feel. & 2. I don't want to hear any "I told you so's." By the time I feel strongly enough about someone enough to introduce them to my family, I'll be ready to take on AND overcome any objections or criticisms from them. It does sound like though that you are over-analyzing the situation. If you honestly feel that he's not cheating on you or hiding something from you, then you should have NOTHING to worry about. When it comes to Cancer men, they want to know exactly how they feel about you first before they subject their partners to open criticism or judgment (good or bad) from the people they love the most. It's only fair & half of the time, it's for YOUR best interest even though it may not seem like it. Try to dig deeper into this guy's family & his relationships with his siblings, past & current. You'll probably get more insight that way

He may not be ready to introduce you to his fam yet, if he has any intentions on ever doing so. They may be a tight knit family, or he may just be a private person. I don't know. But, 5 months really isn't a long time at all.

Meeting family says a lot about the seriousness of your relationship, and whether or not he plans to have you around for a long time. If it's that important to you, which it seems to be, just ask him about it. You may not be on the same page in terms of the pace and progression of the relationship.

women are different from men, women are more apt to wait for a man to meet her family, there are many many men that will introduce a woman to family especially American men (depending on ethnic background) to him it doesn't much matter because he's most likely okay with whatever the outcome of the relationship is. Back in the day men waited but there is now a huge percentage that don't do that anymore so it really isn't something women can use as an indicator that he's serious about her. I have been introduced to family on first meetings and some relationships progressed beyond and some didn't. I have to agree with Krys if he's hiding your things that is a SIGNAL that you should be concerned about plus this post is somewhat old, she is most likely not even with this guy which is fine if she's not, she deserves better treatment and if she is still with him then that's great, won't really know unless she comes back and clues everyone in on the progress of the relationship but what is clear is that he's made it known he was not all that serious or ready for a REAL relationship with anyone and that is not what she wanted.

she shouldn't feel like he's cheating and using her for sex because he's not, he's been very clear at that time that he wasn't ready for anything serious, she accepted that and thus she lost her voice/opinion when she allowed him to lead her in the non-committal direction. It's important that a man know day one that she isn't interested in being in a casual relationship, that commitment is important to her and I don't believe she ever said that to him.

Hey you are the same person who posted the same question in yahoo answers under horoscope section ? Am i right