Cancer woman date #2.

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GOATAction
@GOATAction
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Thought it went really well, but slightly skeptical of a 3rd date happening.

We went to do an indoor putt-putt in black light. Looked super childish but it was actually very fun. Was 18 holes, I won, and we kissed a little after that (and she initiated it!) Had a beer there, talked a little, then took a walk to another bar where we had an app and a few drinks. Got a little deeper with our convo, we were both laughing, light teasing about stuff. Complimented her on her smarts and beauty, she complimented me on my eyes and lashes, said I had "Jake Gyllenhaal" looks in them.

Rode home in a Lyft, had the driver drop her off at her pad first. I stepped out, hugged, and kissed her some more. She left for home earlier today, but is typically kind of responsive. Chatted her asking if she got home safe, she did she says. Then, texted her saying I had a great time, and that I'm looking forward to the next date, already got some plans in mind. No response, but, she did accept my FB friend request (she sent me one on Instagram a few days ago to which I finally accepted yesterday---not on often).

I think I'll get another date and she's just busy with the family today, she did say yesterday her and the mom and sibs would be watching football and going shopping, so, I think I'll be aight. I just overthink things a lot that aren't my career lol 😢 and I'm more pessimistic than optimistic.

Got some plans but what do you guys suggest for a 3rd date? Leaning towards doing something around my apt like a wine tasting or something, then going back to it and watching a movie.
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Pink Bird
@pinkbird03
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Posted by GOATAction

Posted by pinkbird03

Ask her what she wants to do. Then do that.

She planned the 2nd date. I kind of feel like if there's a 3rd, I should do the planning. And, I often don't feel pressed on a timeline situation, but I'm gonna methodically plan to go back to my place, watch a movie, cuddle, and see what happens there.
click to expand



I know you want that but would she be comfortable with that? If you move too fast, she might pull away more.
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GOATAction
@GOATAction
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Posted by pinkbird03

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by pinkbird03

Ask her what she wants to do. Then do that.

She planned the 2nd date. I kind of feel like if there's a 3rd, I should do the planning. And, I often don't feel pressed on a timeline situation, but I'm gonna methodically plan to go back to my place, watch a movie, cuddle, and see what happens there.


I know you want that but would she be comfortable with that? If you move too fast, she might pull away more.
click to expand


She keeps on saying she's very easygoing, hard to disappoint. Describes herself as an eternal optimist whereas I'm more of a realist/pessimist. I don't think she'd get disappointed with anything I decide to do.

Honestly I'm already prepping myself for the bad news/ghosting but I'll know for certain in a few days. I'm not trying to put status on it ASAP, I just want her to know that I'm fully into her and me deleting my profile should say as much to her. Figured if any sign could appreciate that, it would be Cancer. Shows I'm not just about sex imo.
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GOATAction
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Posted by CancerAquaSagg

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by pinkbird03

Ask her what she wants to do. Then do that.

She planned the 2nd date. I kind of feel like if there's a 3rd, I should do the planning. And, I often don't feel pressed on a timeline situation, but I'm gonna methodically plan to go back to my place, watch a movie, cuddle, and see what happens there.


Either be aloof or dominant. But not pushy like a desperate puppy you know?
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In the dates I've been pretty dominant. Going in for the kiss, paying most of the bills, etc.
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Yodi
@Yodi
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I will have to agree with @pinkbird03.. if you move to fast then we'll typically take a step back..

may I suggest you take her out for the next date (dinner) and then give her the option to come over afterwards.

With the whole not texting back the next day thing.. is just her way of not trying to lose herself in a relationship to fast.. she's probably overthinking it too and doesn't want to come off clingy or desperate.. sometimes after a date I don't text the guy until the end of the day.. it gives me time to miss him and also something to talk about.

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GOATAction
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Posted by Yodi

I will have to agree with @pinkbird03.. if you move to fast then we'll typically take a step back..

may I suggest you take her out for the next date (dinner) and then give her the option to come over afterwards.

With the whole not texting back the next day thing.. is just her way of not trying to lose herself in a relationship to fast.. she's probably overthinking it too and doesn't want to come off clingy or desperate.. sometimes after a date I don't text the guy until the end of the day.. it gives me time to miss him and also something to talk about.



Good point. We had been texting pretty consistently for the past week until now. Almost felt like a relationship. Probably good to take a step back. I typically don't like texting, but I love the banter with her.
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GOATAction
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Posted by Black-Mamba

Do not delete your profile. Crabs like a challenge. We don't like anything too easy.

By the way i thought i have up on caps

But my cap friend is so funny. Omg he's so cold the way he talks shit about ppl

I just die

It really made me want to sleep with him

But we've made out before on one drunken night

But man i laughed a good 2 hours

I loved how he was able to get me out of my head

Damn, if I had known this I'd kept it up...but I honestly wasn't using it lately after going on a date with her.

A little situation backstory about me. About 1 month ago, I had a pregnancy scare with a ONS. Condom broke. It was just a mess for an entire week, from us being supportive of each other and texting for the first few days and me getting the plan B, to her not being responsive until she charged me on Venmo for $ 350 because "her gynecologist said she lost eggs due to what happened." It was super stressful, and I took it as God's and the Universe's way of telling me I should try to look for something with more substance when it comes to the opposite sex.

So that's where I'm at now. I've never had a relationship, and some things about it really scare me, but I think I'm finally ready to try. Retrograde Aquarius FTW.
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Pink Bird
@pinkbird03
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Comments: 975 ¡ Posts: 5791 ¡ Topics: 44
Posted by GOATAction

Posted by pinkbird03

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by pinkbird03

Ask her what she wants to do. Then do that.

She planned the 2nd date. I kind of feel like if there's a 3rd, I should do the planning. And, I often don't feel pressed on a timeline situation, but I'm gonna methodically plan to go back to my place, watch a movie, cuddle, and see what happens there.


I know you want that but would she be comfortable with that? If you move too fast, she might pull away more.

She keeps on saying she's very easygoing, hard to disappoint. Describes herself as an eternal optimist whereas I'm more of a realist/pessimist. I don't think she'd get disappointed with anything I decide to do.

Honestly I'm already prepping myself for the bad news/ghosting but I'll know for certain in a few days. I'm not trying to put status on it ASAP, I just want her to know that I'm fully into her and me deleting my profile should say as much to her. Figured if any sign could appreciate that, it would be Cancer. Shows I'm not just about sex imo.
click to expand



You’re getting way to far ahead of yourself my friend. Take it slower. Let things happen naturally for her. I don’t think she’s at the same level yet. I personally need time to develop feelings. Then once I know I like you a lot, I’m 100% all in. But if you pressure me in the beginning, I run. I think you’re walking that thin line right now. I hope you see this. You can have her if you move slower. And buy her a gift. I love gifts.
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GOATAction
@GOATAction
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Comments: 0 ¡ Posts: 726 ¡ Topics: 29
Posted by pinkbird03

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by pinkbird03

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by pinkbird03

Ask her what she wants to do. Then do that.

She planned the 2nd date. I kind of feel like if there's a 3rd, I should do the planning. And, I often don't feel pressed on a timeline situation, but I'm gonna methodically plan to go back to my place, watch a movie, cuddle, and see what happens there.


I know you want that but would she be comfortable with that? If you move too fast, she might pull away more.

She keeps on saying she's very easygoing, hard to disappoint. Describes herself as an eternal optimist whereas I'm more of a realist/pessimist. I don't think she'd get disappointed with anything I decide to do.

Honestly I'm already prepping myself for the bad news/ghosting but I'll know for certain in a few days. I'm not trying to put status on it ASAP, I just want her to know that I'm fully into her and me deleting my profile should say as much to her. Figured if any sign could appreciate that, it would be Cancer. Shows I'm not just about sex imo.


You’re getting way to far ahead of yourself my friend. Take it slower. Let things happen naturally for her. I don’t think she’s at the same level yet. I personally need time to develop feelings. Then once I know I like you a lot, I’m 100% all in. But if you pressure me in the beginning, I run. I think you’re walking that thin line right now. I hope you see this. You can have her if you move slower. And buy her a gift. I love gifts.
click to expand


Yeah I can see I'm walking a thin line. I don't have much XP with this. Have XP with women...but not in a relationship/trying to potentially get into one way. See my prior post.
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Yodi
@Yodi
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 1491 ¡ Posts: 3532 ¡ Topics: 2
Posted by GOATAction

Posted by Yodi

I will have to agree with @pinkbird03.. if you move to fast then we'll typically take a step back..

may I suggest you take her out for the next date (dinner) and then give her the option to come over afterwards.

With the whole not texting back the next day thing.. is just her way of not trying to lose herself in a relationship to fast.. she's probably overthinking it too and doesn't want to come off clingy or desperate.. sometimes after a date I don't text the guy until the end of the day.. it gives me time to miss him and also something to talk about.



Good point. We had been texting pretty consistently for the past week until now. Almost felt like a relationship. Probably good to take a step back. I typically don't like texting, but I love the banter with her.
click to expand



Awwie



You'll get her Mr. Cappy 💪🏿 be her friend first.. get to know her and still live your life. Once you have her heart you'll know.

And hold off on sex.. the first time is on our call.
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GOATAction
@GOATAction
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Comments: 0 ¡ Posts: 726 ¡ Topics: 29
Posted by pinkbird03

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by pinkbird03

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by pinkbird03

Ask her what she wants to do. Then do that.

She planned the 2nd date. I kind of feel like if there's a 3rd, I should do the planning. And, I often don't feel pressed on a timeline situation, but I'm gonna methodically plan to go back to my place, watch a movie, cuddle, and see what happens there.


I know you want that but would she be comfortable with that? If you move too fast, she might pull away more.

She keeps on saying she's very easygoing, hard to disappoint. Describes herself as an eternal optimist whereas I'm more of a realist/pessimist. I don't think she'd get disappointed with anything I decide to do.

Honestly I'm already prepping myself for the bad news/ghosting but I'll know for certain in a few days. I'm not trying to put status on it ASAP, I just want her to know that I'm fully into her and me deleting my profile should say as much to her. Figured if any sign could appreciate that, it would be Cancer. Shows I'm not just about sex imo.


You’re getting way to far ahead of yourself my friend. Take it slower. Let things happen naturally for her. I don’t think she’s at the same level yet. I personally need time to develop feelings. Then once I know I like you a lot, I’m 100% all in. But if you pressure me in the beginning, I run. I think you’re walking that thin line right now. I hope you see this. You can have her if you move slower. And buy her a gift. I love gifts.
click to expand


If I see her again what gift would you recommend?
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Pink Bird
@pinkbird03
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Comments: 975 ¡ Posts: 5791 ¡ Topics: 44
Posted by GOATAction

Posted by pinkbird03

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by pinkbird03

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by pinkbird03

Ask her what she wants to do. Then do that.

She planned the 2nd date. I kind of feel like if there's a 3rd, I should do the planning. And, I often don't feel pressed on a timeline situation, but I'm gonna methodically plan to go back to my place, watch a movie, cuddle, and see what happens there.


I know you want that but would she be comfortable with that? If you move too fast, she might pull away more.

She keeps on saying she's very easygoing, hard to disappoint. Describes herself as an eternal optimist whereas I'm more of a realist/pessimist. I don't think she'd get disappointed with anything I decide to do.

Honestly I'm already prepping myself for the bad news/ghosting but I'll know for certain in a few days. I'm not trying to put status on it ASAP, I just want her to know that I'm fully into her and me deleting my profile should say as much to her. Figured if any sign could appreciate that, it would be Cancer. Shows I'm not just about sex imo.


You’re getting way to far ahead of yourself my friend. Take it slower. Let things happen naturally for her. I don’t think she’s at the same level yet. I personally need time to develop feelings. Then once I know I like you a lot, I’m 100% all in. But if you pressure me in the beginning, I run. I think you’re walking that thin line right now. I hope you see this. You can have her if you move slower. And buy her a gift. I love gifts.

If I see her again what gift would you recommend?
click to expand



A keepsake. Something that will last forever. Like a necklace. Not flowers
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GOATAction
@GOATAction
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Posted by Marai

Posted by GOATAction

Kind of want to text her. Our last exchanged message was from her last night at 11:24pm.


Try to keep it light. As previous Cancers have said on this thread, we withdraw if we get a feeling you're calculating things. And that's what you're doing. Be a friend, do something silly, like clay pigeon shooting, bowling, play pool, midget golf or whatever, you'll gain more in on long term. Good luck!
click to expand


So hard. I just think with so much depth and intent. But I'll try.
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GOATAction
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Yeah, I got the text that confirmed my fears (and those ITT). After I texted her saying her thoughts on a particular third date, she texted me and said "she had a good time, but doesn't feel we're a good fit." For reference, I'm 28, she's 24. She's kind of still into the party scene (just got her Master's) and probably goes out about every weekend. Me? I don't mind having a good time and occasionally clubbing, but I'm content to be an introvert and focus on life/career goals. Small circle of friends.

I guess I just don't get why a person does and says things, but they ultimately hold little to no meaning. Just about everything I say and do has intent and can be taken to the bank.

I think I'm just too heavy, and scare some people and women off and make them uneasy. No one likes a super realistic/kind of pessimistic person, which I've said I am to her twice. Maybe I'm too self-aware also, and rather put out my shortcomings so that people get a solid idea of me and accept me for who I am. Venus natal retrograde for the loss smh lol.

Well, back to the dating apps.
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Yodi
@Yodi
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Posted by GOATAction

Yeah, I got the text that confirmed my fears (and those ITT). After I texted her saying her thoughts on a particular third date, she texted me and said "she had a good time, but doesn't feel we're a good fit." For reference, I'm 28, she's 24. She's kind of still into the party scene (just got her Master's) and probably goes out about every weekend. Me? I don't mind having a good time and occasionally clubbing, but I'm content to be an introvert and focus on life/career goals. Small circle of friends.

I guess I just don't get why a person does and says things, but they ultimately hold little to no meaning. Just about everything I say and do has intent and can be taken to the bank.

I think I'm just too heavy, and scare some people and women off and make them uneasy. No one likes a super realistic/kind of pessimistic person, which I've said I am to her twice. Maybe I'm too self-aware also, and rather put out my shortcomings so that people get a solid idea of me and accept me for who I am. Venus natal retrograde for the loss smh lol.

Well, back to the dating apps.


Fux her.. you'll find better.

I'm curious to know what did you guys talk about during your last date? Did something awkward happen that your leaving out? And do you put yourself down in front of her? What do you mean by your too heavy?
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GOATAction
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Posted by Yodi

Posted by GOATAction

Yeah, I got the text that confirmed my fears (and those ITT). After I texted her saying her thoughts on a particular third date, she texted me and said "she had a good time, but doesn't feel we're a good fit." For reference, I'm 28, she's 24. She's kind of still into the party scene (just got her Master's) and probably goes out about every weekend. Me? I don't mind having a good time and occasionally clubbing, but I'm content to be an introvert and focus on life/career goals. Small circle of friends.

I guess I just don't get why a person does and says things, but they ultimately hold little to no meaning. Just about everything I say and do has intent and can be taken to the bank.

I think I'm just too heavy, and scare some people and women off and make them uneasy. No one likes a super realistic/kind of pessimistic person, which I've said I am to her twice. Maybe I'm too self-aware also, and rather put out my shortcomings so that people get a solid idea of me and accept me for who I am. Venus natal retrograde for the loss smh lol.

Well, back to the dating apps.


Fux her.. you'll find better.

I'm curious to know what did you guys talk about during your last date? Did something awkward happen that your leaving out? And do you put yourself down in front of her? What do you mean by your too heavy?
click to expand


There was one convo about her choosing to be optimistic in everything she does and comes across. I think this was in response to me saying how I'm typically more of a grounded individual who focuses more on the half empty side of things. I didn't think this was awkward but maybe it was. I told her I liked that about her and that I need more of that in my approach.

I don't put myself down in front of people. But, I like to give them a picture of who I am, and I'd rather put the stuff out there I'm less confident about and get that on the table.

Honestly, this article pretty much describes me to a T, https://cafeastrology.com/articles/capricornmanlove.html

Basically, I don't like defining astrology for everything (and I don't), but after really getting into my chart this year, I've deduced I'm a "heavy" individual. Uber dependable and tons of substance, but maybe a little too much. Sun, Mercury, Saturn, Uranus, and Neptune in Capricorn, all of those planets in 8th minus Sun in 9th. Moon in Virgo, Venus in cool/detached Aquarius. Sometimes I feel like an alien lol.

Retrograded planets in Mercury, Venus, and Jupiter. Being "light" doesn't come easily for me.
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Yodi
@Yodi
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 1491 ¡ Posts: 3532 ¡ Topics: 2
Posted by GOATAction

Posted by Yodi

Posted by GOATAction

Yeah, I got the text that confirmed my fears (and those ITT). After I texted her saying her thoughts on a particular third date, she texted me and said "she had a good time, but doesn't feel we're a good fit." For reference, I'm 28, she's 24. She's kind of still into the party scene (just got her Master's) and probably goes out about every weekend. Me? I don't mind having a good time and occasionally clubbing, but I'm content to be an introvert and focus on life/career goals. Small circle of friends.

I guess I just don't get why a person does and says things, but they ultimately hold little to no meaning. Just about everything I say and do has intent and can be taken to the bank.

I think I'm just too heavy, and scare some people and women off and make them uneasy. No one likes a super realistic/kind of pessimistic person, which I've said I am to her twice. Maybe I'm too self-aware also, and rather put out my shortcomings so that people get a solid idea of me and accept me for who I am. Venus natal retrograde for the loss smh lol.

Well, back to the dating apps.


Fux her.. you'll find better.

I'm curious to know what did you guys talk about during your last date? Did something awkward happen that your leaving out? And do you put yourself down in front of her? What do you mean by your too heavy?

There was one convo about her choosing to be optimistic in everything she does and comes across. I think this was in response to me saying how I'm typically more of a grounded individual who focuses more on the half empty side of things. I didn't think this was awkward but maybe it was. I told her I liked that about her and that I need more of that in my approach.

I don't put myself down in front of people. But, I like to give them a picture of who I am, and I'd rather put the stuff out there I'm less confident about and get that on the table.

Honestly, this article pretty much describes me to a T, https://cafeastrology.com/articles/capricornmanlove.html

Basically, I don't like defining astrology for everything (and I don't), but after really getting into my chart this year, I've deduced I'm a "heavy" individual. Uber dependable and tons of substance, but maybe a little too much. Sun, Mercury, Saturn, Uranus, and Neptune in Capricorn, all of those planets in 8th minus Sun in 9th. Moon in Virgo, Venus in cool/detached Aquarius. Sometimes I feel like an alien lol.

Retrograded planets in Mercury, Venus, and Jupiter. Being "light" doesn't come easily for me.
click to expand



Yeah.. the way you explained it doesn't seem cringeworthy enough to cut you off.. maybe you're negative without realizing it? How did you respond to her text? Maybe she's testing you? Did you reactivate your account before or after that text?

I get that this is an astrology forum but don't let that sh!!t define you.. if there's something you don't like about yourself then change it.. for you tho.. not for anybody else. I hate to say this but she probably has someone else or just pushing you away to focus on life and something you did or said turned her off and made her put her walls back up.. it's hard to tell.

Anywhoo.. My moon is in 8th but idk wtf it means 🤷🏿‍♀️ I have nothing in the 9th.
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GOATAction
@GOATAction
7 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 0 ¡ Posts: 726 ¡ Topics: 29
Posted by Yodi

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by Yodi

Posted by GOATAction

Yeah, I got the text that confirmed my fears (and those ITT). After I texted her saying her thoughts on a particular third date, she texted me and said "she had a good time, but doesn't feel we're a good fit." For reference, I'm 28, she's 24. She's kind of still into the party scene (just got her Master's) and probably goes out about every weekend. Me? I don't mind having a good time and occasionally clubbing, but I'm content to be an introvert and focus on life/career goals. Small circle of friends.

I guess I just don't get why a person does and says things, but they ultimately hold little to no meaning. Just about everything I say and do has intent and can be taken to the bank.

I think I'm just too heavy, and scare some people and women off and make them uneasy. No one likes a super realistic/kind of pessimistic person, which I've said I am to her twice. Maybe I'm too self-aware also, and rather put out my shortcomings so that people get a solid idea of me and accept me for who I am. Venus natal retrograde for the loss smh lol.

Well, back to the dating apps.


Fux her.. you'll find better.

I'm curious to know what did you guys talk about during your last date? Did something awkward happen that your leaving out? And do you put yourself down in front of her? What do you mean by your too heavy?

There was one convo about her choosing to be optimistic in everything she does and comes across. I think this was in response to me saying how I'm typically more of a grounded individual who focuses more on the half empty side of things. I didn't think this was awkward but maybe it was. I told her I liked that about her and that I need more of that in my approach.

I don't put myself down in front of people. But, I like to give them a picture of who I am, and I'd rather put the stuff out there I'm less confident about and get that on the table.

Honestly, this article pretty much describes me to a T, https://cafeastrology.com/articles/capricornmanlove.html

Basically, I don't like defining astrology for everything (and I don't), but after really getting into my chart this year, I've deduced I'm a "heavy" individual. Uber dependable and tons of substance, but maybe a little too much. Sun, Mercury, Saturn, Uranus, and Neptune in Capricorn, all of those planets in 8th minus Sun in 9th. Moon in Virgo, Venus in cool/detached Aquarius. Sometimes I feel like an alien lol.

Retrograded planets in Mercury, Venus, and Jupiter. Being "light" doesn't come easily for me.


Yeah.. the way you explained it doesn't seem cringeworthy enough to cut you off.. maybe you're negative without realizing it? How did you respond to her text? Maybe she's testing you? Did you reactivate your account before or after that text?

I get that this is an astrology forum but don't let that sh!!t define you.. if there's something you don't like about yourself then change it.. for you tho.. not for anybody else. I hate to say this but she probably has someone else or just pushing you away to focus on life and something you did or said turned her off and made her put her walls back up.. it's hard to tell.

Anywhoo.. My moon is in 8th but idk wtf it means 🤷🏿‍♀️ I have nothing in the 9th.

click to expand


The 8th house is a heavy house. Death, depths, hidden power, sexuality. I've got a stellium here, I think it kind of draws the opposite sex to me easy. Capricorn is a heavy/cold sign. Pair these two together and I'm not predisposed to be the stuff of suns and rainbows.

I completely deleted my profiles. Unfriended her on facebook. Told her I think we could be a great fit and that I'd be open to trying again, but the choice is hers. I try to detach professionally and cordially now, which is something I didn't do years ago.

If she's testing me, I'm not about it. I rarely enjoy mind games. I've no time for them. I'll never understand women and why someone would do this. If she knew she wasn't about me, I don't get the compliments and the kissing.
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GOATAction
@GOATAction
7 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 0 ¡ Posts: 726 ¡ Topics: 29
Posted by RooSagicorn

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by Yodi

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by Yodi

Posted by GOATAction

Yeah, I got the text that confirmed my fears (and those ITT). After I texted her saying her thoughts on a particular third date, she texted me and said "she had a good time, but doesn't feel we're a good fit." For reference, I'm 28, she's 24. She's kind of still into the party scene (just got her Master's) and probably goes out about every weekend. Me? I don't mind having a good time and occasionally clubbing, but I'm content to be an introvert and focus on life/career goals. Small circle of friends.

I guess I just don't get why a person does and says things, but they ultimately hold little to no meaning. Just about everything I say and do has intent and can be taken to the bank.

I think I'm just too heavy, and scare some people and women off and make them uneasy. No one likes a super realistic/kind of pessimistic person, which I've said I am to her twice. Maybe I'm too self-aware also, and rather put out my shortcomings so that people get a solid idea of me and accept me for who I am. Venus natal retrograde for the loss smh lol.

Well, back to the dating apps.


Fux her.. you'll find better.

I'm curious to know what did you guys talk about during your last date? Did something awkward happen that your leaving out? And do you put yourself down in front of her? What do you mean by your too heavy?

There was one convo about her choosing to be optimistic in everything she does and comes across. I think this was in response to me saying how I'm typically more of a grounded individual who focuses more on the half empty side of things. I didn't think this was awkward but maybe it was. I told her I liked that about her and that I need more of that in my approach.

I don't put myself down in front of people. But, I like to give them a picture of who I am, and I'd rather put the stuff out there I'm less confident about and get that on the table.

Honestly, this article pretty much describes me to a T, https://cafeastrology.com/articles/capricornmanlove.html

Basically, I don't like defining astrology for everything (and I don't), but after really getting into my chart this year, I've deduced I'm a "heavy" individual. Uber dependable and tons of substance, but maybe a little too much. Sun, Mercury, Saturn, Uranus, and Neptune in Capricorn, all of those planets in 8th minus Sun in 9th. Moon in Virgo, Venus in cool/detached Aquarius. Sometimes I feel like an alien lol.

Retrograded planets in Mercury, Venus, and Jupiter. Being "light" doesn't come easily for me.


Yeah.. the way you explained it doesn't seem cringeworthy enough to cut you off.. maybe you're negative without realizing it? How did you respond to her text? Maybe she's testing you? Did you reactivate your account before or after that text?

I get that this is an astrology forum but don't let that sh!!t define you.. if there's something you don't like about yourself then change it.. for you tho.. not for anybody else. I hate to say this but she probably has someone else or just pushing you away to focus on life and something you did or said turned her off and made her put her walls back up.. it's hard to tell.

Anywhoo.. My moon is in 8th but idk wtf it means 🤷🏿‍♀️ I have nothing in the 9th.



The 8th house is a heavy house. Death, depths, hidden power, sexuality. I've got a stellium here, I think it kind of draws the opposite sex to me easy. Capricorn is a heavy/cold sign. Pair these two together and I'm not predisposed to be the stuff of suns and rainbows.

I completely deleted my profiles. Unfriended her on facebook. Told her I think we could be a great fit and that I'd be open to trying again, but the choice is hers. I try to detach professionally and cordially now, which is something I didn't do years ago.

If she's testing me, I'm not about it. I rarely enjoy mind games. I've no time for them. I'll never understand women and why someone would do this. If she knew she wasn't about me, I don't get the compliments and the kissing.


Well the realism/pessimism is hard for an optimist & if you’re being heavy it’s kinda hard to know what to do with that. Plus the differences in life style .. it just sounds like maybe she’s telling the truth.. it’s not a good fit even if she liked you a little ( enough to kiss & compliment you).
click to expand


Yeah I've probably torpeoded prior potential relationships because I have a tendency to dwell on the negative. It's who I am though at my core. But I'm also perceptive and intuitive, I didn't want to believe it but I just had a feeling that she was out. Like I said, still don't understand the physical and verbal vibes she was giving me (I can overlook words, but kisses definitely leads someone on, and they were pretty good kisses, not quick pecks). That's not me, to lead a person on.

Since I'm in the midst of my first return I've already made some changes (loosened up my grip on control, changed careers, etc), but I know I have to try and make this one, or at least fake it.

Profile picture of Yodi
Yodi
@Yodi
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 1491 ¡ Posts: 3532 ¡ Topics: 2
Posted by GOATAction

Posted by Yodi

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by Yodi

Posted by GOATAction

Yeah, I got the text that confirmed my fears (and those ITT). After I texted her saying her thoughts on a particular third date, she texted me and said "she had a good time, but doesn't feel we're a good fit." For reference, I'm 28, she's 24. She's kind of still into the party scene (just got her Master's) and probably goes out about every weekend. Me? I don't mind having a good time and occasionally clubbing, but I'm content to be an introvert and focus on life/career goals. Small circle of friends.

I guess I just don't get why a person does and says things, but they ultimately hold little to no meaning. Just about everything I say and do has intent and can be taken to the bank.

I think I'm just too heavy, and scare some people and women off and make them uneasy. No one likes a super realistic/kind of pessimistic person, which I've said I am to her twice. Maybe I'm too self-aware also, and rather put out my shortcomings so that people get a solid idea of me and accept me for who I am. Venus natal retrograde for the loss smh lol.

Well, back to the dating apps.


Fux her.. you'll find better.

I'm curious to know what did you guys talk about during your last date? Did something awkward happen that your leaving out? And do you put yourself down in front of her? What do you mean by your too heavy?

There was one convo about her choosing to be optimistic in everything she does and comes across. I think this was in response to me saying how I'm typically more of a grounded individual who focuses more on the half empty side of things. I didn't think this was awkward but maybe it was. I told her I liked that about her and that I need more of that in my approach.

I don't put myself down in front of people. But, I like to give them a picture of who I am, and I'd rather put the stuff out there I'm less confident about and get that on the table.

Honestly, this article pretty much describes me to a T, https://cafeastrology.com/articles/capricornmanlove.html

Basically, I don't like defining astrology for everything (and I don't), but after really getting into my chart this year, I've deduced I'm a "heavy" individual. Uber dependable and tons of substance, but maybe a little too much. Sun, Mercury, Saturn, Uranus, and Neptune in Capricorn, all of those planets in 8th minus Sun in 9th. Moon in Virgo, Venus in cool/detached Aquarius. Sometimes I feel like an alien lol.

Retrograded planets in Mercury, Venus, and Jupiter. Being "light" doesn't come easily for me.


Yeah.. the way you explained it doesn't seem cringeworthy enough to cut you off.. maybe you're negative without realizing it? How did you respond to her text? Maybe she's testing you? Did you reactivate your account before or after that text?

I get that this is an astrology forum but don't let that sh!!t define you.. if there's something you don't like about yourself then change it.. for you tho.. not for anybody else. I hate to say this but she probably has someone else or just pushing you away to focus on life and something you did or said turned her off and made her put her walls back up.. it's hard to tell.

Anywhoo.. My moon is in 8th but idk wtf it means 🤷🏿‍♀️ I have nothing in the 9th.



The 8th house is a heavy house. Death, depths, hidden power, sexuality. I've got a stellium here, I think it kind of draws the opposite sex to me easy. Capricorn is a heavy/cold sign. Pair these two together and I'm not predisposed to be the stuff of suns and rainbows.

I completely deleted my profiles. Unfriended her on facebook. Told her I think we could be a great fit and that I'd be open to trying again, but the choice is hers. I try to detach professionally and cordially now, which is something I didn't do years ago.

If she's testing me, I'm not about it. I rarely enjoy mind games. I've no time for them. I'll never understand women and why someone would do this. If she knew she wasn't about me, I don't get the compliments and the kissing.
click to expand



Death?! As in we like it or is surrounded by it? How do I find my stellium?..

hmm caps come off as cold but I know better.. if you guys are into someone you'll open up quick but the heavy and the controlling part.. I get

my cap bestie doesn't see how she can turn a man off during the early stages of dating but then when things end she'll secretly blame her physical appearance instead of working on her inner self.. she'll spend money on things to enhance her look ( clothes, hair etc.)

I don't get it because she's only knew the guy for a week and fail to realize she's placing too much pressure on someone she doesn't even know.. why give a stranger so much power over you 🙄🤔

I could see why you feel like she played you but.. how else would she have known ya'll wasn't going to work out unless she dated you?

I'm in a similar situation as you but we've been kickin it for a little over 2 months and I still don't know if I want to be his gf.. I was extremely attracted to him in the beginning but something changed.. it has to do with his personality and the way he handles certain situations.

Crabs play games I'm not going to sit here and lie to you and we're also moody asf.. if I sent that text during one of my episodes and you responded by deleting me everywhere I'd think you never liked me to begin with and only wanted me for my looks.. deadass that's how I'd feel.. even if I pulled the trigger 😅 we (or me) like fighters/ riders.. I have to know how much of me you can handle before I completely let you in.
Profile picture of GOATAction
GOATAction
@GOATAction
7 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 0 ¡ Posts: 726 ¡ Topics: 29
Posted by Yodi

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by Yodi

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by Yodi

Posted by GOATAction

Yeah, I got the text that confirmed my fears (and those ITT). After I texted her saying her thoughts on a particular third date, she texted me and said "she had a good time, but doesn't feel we're a good fit." For reference, I'm 28, she's 24. She's kind of still into the party scene (just got her Master's) and probably goes out about every weekend. Me? I don't mind having a good time and occasionally clubbing, but I'm content to be an introvert and focus on life/career goals. Small circle of friends.

I guess I just don't get why a person does and says things, but they ultimately hold little to no meaning. Just about everything I say and do has intent and can be taken to the bank.

I think I'm just too heavy, and scare some people and women off and make them uneasy. No one likes a super realistic/kind of pessimistic person, which I've said I am to her twice. Maybe I'm too self-aware also, and rather put out my shortcomings so that people get a solid idea of me and accept me for who I am. Venus natal retrograde for the loss smh lol.

Well, back to the dating apps.


Fux her.. you'll find better.

I'm curious to know what did you guys talk about during your last date? Did something awkward happen that your leaving out? And do you put yourself down in front of her? What do you mean by your too heavy?

There was one convo about her choosing to be optimistic in everything she does and comes across. I think this was in response to me saying how I'm typically more of a grounded individual who focuses more on the half empty side of things. I didn't think this was awkward but maybe it was. I told her I liked that about her and that I need more of that in my approach.

I don't put myself down in front of people. But, I like to give them a picture of who I am, and I'd rather put the stuff out there I'm less confident about and get that on the table.

Honestly, this article pretty much describes me to a T, https://cafeastrology.com/articles/capricornmanlove.html

Basically, I don't like defining astrology for everything (and I don't), but after really getting into my chart this year, I've deduced I'm a "heavy" individual. Uber dependable and tons of substance, but maybe a little too much. Sun, Mercury, Saturn, Uranus, and Neptune in Capricorn, all of those planets in 8th minus Sun in 9th. Moon in Virgo, Venus in cool/detached Aquarius. Sometimes I feel like an alien lol.

Retrograded planets in Mercury, Venus, and Jupiter. Being "light" doesn't come easily for me.


Yeah.. the way you explained it doesn't seem cringeworthy enough to cut you off.. maybe you're negative without realizing it? How did you respond to her text? Maybe she's testing you? Did you reactivate your account before or after that text?

I get that this is an astrology forum but don't let that sh!!t define you.. if there's something you don't like about yourself then change it.. for you tho.. not for anybody else. I hate to say this but she probably has someone else or just pushing you away to focus on life and something you did or said turned her off and made her put her walls back up.. it's hard to tell.

Anywhoo.. My moon is in 8th but idk wtf it means 🤷🏿‍♀️ I have nothing in the 9th.



The 8th house is a heavy house. Death, depths, hidden power, sexuality. I've got a stellium here, I think it kind of draws the opposite sex to me easy. Capricorn is a heavy/cold sign. Pair these two together and I'm not predisposed to be the stuff of suns and rainbows.

I completely deleted my profiles. Unfriended her on facebook. Told her I think we could be a great fit and that I'd be open to trying again, but the choice is hers. I try to detach professionally and cordially now, which is something I didn't do years ago.

If she's testing me, I'm not about it. I rarely enjoy mind games. I've no time for them. I'll never understand women and why someone would do this. If she knew she wasn't about me, I don't get the compliments and the kissing.


Death?! As in we like it or is surrounded by it? How do I find my stellium?..

hmm caps come off as cold but I know better.. if you guys are into someone you'll open up quick but the heavy and the controlling part.. I get

my cap bestie doesn't see how she can turn a man off during the early stages of dating but then when things end she'll secretly blame her physical appearance instead of working on her inner self.. she'll spend money on things to enhance her look ( clothes, hair etc.)

I don't get it because she's only knew the guy for a week and fail to realize she's placing too much pressure on someone she doesn't even know.. why give a stranger so much power over you 🙄🤔

I could see why you feel like she played you but.. how else would she have known ya'll wasn't going to work out unless she dated you?

I'm in a similar situation as you but we've been kickin it for a little over 2 months and I still don't know if I want to be his gf.. I was extremely attracted to him in the beginning but something changed.. it has to do with his personality and the way he handles certain situations.

Crabs play games I'm not going to sit here and lie to you and we're also moody asf.. if I sent that text during one of my episodes and you responded by deleting me everywhere I'd think you never liked me to begin with and only wanted me for my looks.. deadass that's how I'd feel.. even if I pulled the trigger 😅 we (or me) like fighters/ riders.. I have to know how much of me you can handle before I let you completely in.

click to expand


I feel like by me telling her that I'd still be interested if she ever wanted to try again should let her know that I would welcome the opportunity to try again. and I'm not just into her for looks.

As for deleting, it's hard for me to remain connected with someone who I'm interested in on a romantic level and the feeling's not there on her level. I'd rather just cut them out of my life, instead of seeing a post or two and wonder "what if?"

The more I think about it, I think I lost her on the 2nd half of the 2nd date. We discussed our worldviews (realist/optimist), why we were single (I gave a Cap answer about committing myself to my career and business ventures, I've never had a real relationship but this is true, focus on my career and I've built a successful review website from the ground up over four years ago), and even social media (she seems to post a lot, sharing a ton of moments. I don't, and I got a little opinionated about Snap/IG, saying the selfie culture's not for me). I could see how she'd consider that incompatible and maybe think of me as a no-fun, semi-neurotic individual who she could not enjoy for long stretches or around her friend.

Something I gotta improve on, play the game a little while longer so that once someone's all in on me, they just see those traits as idiosyncrasies who make me me and not negatives that could derail a potential relationship.

You can find your placements by running your natal chart.
Profile picture of Yodi
Yodi
@Yodi
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 1491 ¡ Posts: 3532 ¡ Topics: 2
Posted by GOATAction

Posted by Yodi

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by Yodi

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by Yodi

Posted by GOATAction

Yeah, I got the text that confirmed my fears (and those ITT). After I texted her saying her thoughts on a particular third date, she texted me and said "she had a good time, but doesn't feel we're a good fit." For reference, I'm 28, she's 24. She's kind of still into the party scene (just got her Master's) and probably goes out about every weekend. Me? I don't mind having a good time and occasionally clubbing, but I'm content to be an introvert and focus on life/career goals. Small circle of friends.

I guess I just don't get why a person does and says things, but they ultimately hold little to no meaning. Just about everything I say and do has intent and can be taken to the bank.

I think I'm just too heavy, and scare some people and women off and make them uneasy. No one likes a super realistic/kind of pessimistic person, which I've said I am to her twice. Maybe I'm too self-aware also, and rather put out my shortcomings so that people get a solid idea of me and accept me for who I am. Venus natal retrograde for the loss smh lol.

Well, back to the dating apps.


Fux her.. you'll find better.

I'm curious to know what did you guys talk about during your last date? Did something awkward happen that your leaving out? And do you put yourself down in front of her? What do you mean by your too heavy?

There was one convo about her choosing to be optimistic in everything she does and comes across. I think this was in response to me saying how I'm typically more of a grounded individual who focuses more on the half empty side of things. I didn't think this was awkward but maybe it was. I told her I liked that about her and that I need more of that in my approach.

I don't put myself down in front of people. But, I like to give them a picture of who I am, and I'd rather put the stuff out there I'm less confident about and get that on the table.

Honestly, this article pretty much describes me to a T, https://cafeastrology.com/articles/capricornmanlove.html

Basically, I don't like defining astrology for everything (and I don't), but after really getting into my chart this year, I've deduced I'm a "heavy" individual. Uber dependable and tons of substance, but maybe a little too much. Sun, Mercury, Saturn, Uranus, and Neptune in Capricorn, all of those planets in 8th minus Sun in 9th. Moon in Virgo, Venus in cool/detached Aquarius. Sometimes I feel like an alien lol.

Retrograded planets in Mercury, Venus, and Jupiter. Being "light" doesn't come easily for me.


Yeah.. the way you explained it doesn't seem cringeworthy enough to cut you off.. maybe you're negative without realizing it? How did you respond to her text? Maybe she's testing you? Did you reactivate your account before or after that text?

I get that this is an astrology forum but don't let that sh!!t define you.. if there's something you don't like about yourself then change it.. for you tho.. not for anybody else. I hate to say this but she probably has someone else or just pushing you away to focus on life and something you did or said turned her off and made her put her walls back up.. it's hard to tell.

Anywhoo.. My moon is in 8th but idk wtf it means 🤷🏿‍♀️ I have nothing in the 9th.



The 8th house is a heavy house. Death, depths, hidden power, sexuality. I've got a stellium here, I think it kind of draws the opposite sex to me easy. Capricorn is a heavy/cold sign. Pair these two together and I'm not predisposed to be the stuff of suns and rainbows.

I completely deleted my profiles. Unfriended her on facebook. Told her I think we could be a great fit and that I'd be open to trying again, but the choice is hers. I try to detach professionally and cordially now, which is something I didn't do years ago.

If she's testing me, I'm not about it. I rarely enjoy mind games. I've no time for them. I'll never understand women and why someone would do this. If she knew she wasn't about me, I don't get the compliments and the kissing.


Death?! As in we like it or is surrounded by it? How do I find my stellium?..

hmm caps come off as cold but I know better.. if you guys are into someone you'll open up quick but the heavy and the controlling part.. I get

my cap bestie doesn't see how she can turn a man off during the early stages of dating but then when things end she'll secretly blame her physical appearance instead of working on her inner self.. she'll spend money on things to enhance her look ( clothes, hair etc.)

I don't get it because she's only knew the guy for a week and fail to realize she's placing too much pressure on someone she doesn't even know.. why give a stranger so much power over you 🙄🤔

I could see why you feel like she played you but.. how else would she have known ya'll wasn't going to work out unless she dated you?

I'm in a similar situation as you but we've been kickin it for a little over 2 months and I still don't know if I want to be his gf.. I was extremely attracted to him in the beginning but something changed.. it has to do with his personality and the way he handles certain situations.

Crabs play games I'm not going to sit here and lie to you and we're also moody asf.. if I sent that text during one of my episodes and you responded by deleting me everywhere I'd think you never liked me to begin with and only wanted me for my looks.. deadass that's how I'd feel.. even if I pulled the trigger 😅 we (or me) like fighters/ riders.. I have to know how much of me you can handle before I let you completely in.



I feel like by me telling her that I'd still be interested if she ever wanted to try again should let her know that I would welcome the opportunity to try again. and I'm not just into her for looks.

As for deleting, it's hard for me to remain connected with someone who I'm interested in on a romantic level and the feeling's not there on her level. I'd rather just cut them out of my life, instead of seeing a post or two and wonder "what if?"

The more I think about it, I think I lost her on the 2nd half of the 2nd date. We discussed our worldviews (realist/optimist), why we were single (I gave a Cap answer about committing myself to my career and business ventures, I've never had a real relationship but this is true, focus on my career and I've built a successful review website from the ground up over four years ago), and even social media (she seems to post a lot, sharing a ton of moments. I don't, and I got a little opinionated about Snap/IG, saying the selfie culture's not for me). I could see how she'd consider that incompatible and maybe think of me as a no-fun, semi-neurotic individual who she could not enjoy for long stretches or around her friend.

Something I gotta improve on, play the game a little while longer so that once someone's all in on me, they just see those traits as idiosyncrasies who make me me and not negatives that could derail a potential relationship.

You can find your placements by running your natal chart.
click to expand



That could be it but only she knows the answer to that.. and like I've stated before.. you being ambitious toward your career shouldn't have been a turn off for her 🤷🏿‍♀️ At least you are learning from this and is choosing to grow rather then dwell.

Don't be to hard on yourself.. you will find someone that loves you for you.
Profile picture of bkbella86
bkbella86
@bkbella86
14 Years5,000+ PostsAries

Comments: 3 ¡ Posts: 7849 ¡ Topics: 52
Posted by GOATAction

Thought it went really well, but slightly skeptical of a 3rd date happening.

We went to do an indoor putt-putt in black light. Looked super childish but it was actually very fun. Was 18 holes, I won, and we kissed a little after that (and she initiated it!) Had a beer there, talked a little, then took a walk to another bar where we had an app and a few drinks. Got a little deeper with our convo, we were both laughing, light teasing about stuff. Complimented her on her smarts and beauty, she complimented me on my eyes and lashes, said I had "Jake Gyllenhaal" looks in them.

Rode home in a Lyft, had the driver drop her off at her pad first. I stepped out, hugged, and kissed her some more. She left for home earlier today, but is typically kind of responsive. Chatted her asking if she got home safe, she did she says. Then, texted her saying I had a great time, and that I'm looking forward to the next date, already got some plans in mind. No response, but, she did accept my FB friend request (she sent me one on Instagram a few days ago to which I finally accepted yesterday---not on often).

I think I'll get another date and she's just busy with the family today, she did say yesterday her and the mom and sibs would be watching football and going shopping, so, I think I'll be aight. I just overthink things a lot that aren't my career lol 😢 and I'm more pessimistic than optimistic.

Got some plans but what do you guys suggest for a 3rd date? Leaning towards doing something around my apt like a wine tasting or something, then going back to it and watching a movie.


A house date after getting her liquored up for a third date? Seems too fast to me. Why are you thinking of that?
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bkbella86
@bkbella86
14 Years5,000+ PostsAries

Comments: 3 ¡ Posts: 7849 ¡ Topics: 52
Posted by GOATAction

Posted by CancerAquaSagg

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by pinkbird03

Ask her what she wants to do. Then do that.

She planned the 2nd date. I kind of feel like if there's a 3rd, I should do the planning. And, I often don't feel pressed on a timeline situation, but I'm gonna methodically plan to go back to my place, watch a movie, cuddle, and see what happens there.


Either be aloof or dominant. But not pushy like a desperate puppy you know?

In the dates I've been pretty dominant. Going in for the kiss, paying most of the bills, etc.
click to expand



Most of the bill?
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bkbella86
@bkbella86
14 Years5,000+ PostsAries

Comments: 3 ¡ Posts: 7849 ¡ Topics: 52
Posted by GOATAction

Posted by Black-Mamba

Do not delete your profile. Crabs like a challenge. We don't like anything too easy.

By the way i thought i have up on caps

But my cap friend is so funny. Omg he's so cold the way he talks shit about ppl

I just die

It really made me want to sleep with him

But we've made out before on one drunken night

But man i laughed a good 2 hours

I loved how he was able to get me out of my head

Damn, if I had known this I'd kept it up...but I honestly wasn't using it lately after going on a date with her.

A little situation backstory about me. About 1 month ago, I had a pregnancy scare with a ONS. Condom broke. It was just a mess for an entire week, from us being supportive of each other and texting for the first few days and me getting the plan B, to her not being responsive until she charged me on Venmo for $ 350 because "her gynecologist said she lost eggs due to what happened." It was super stressful, and I took it as God's and the Universe's way of telling me I should try to look for something with more substance when it comes to the opposite sex.

So that's where I'm at now. I've never had a relationship, and some things about it really scare me, but I think I'm finally ready to try. Retrograde Aquarius FTW.
click to expand



Lmaooo she lost eggs and that’s your fault? Wtf

How? How did she even know this?
Profile picture of VenusAquarius
"So I can show off my gold chain, gold ring. Roll through the hood on them gold thangs"
@VenusAquarius
13 Years10,000+ Posts

Comments: 4341 ¡ Posts: 13269 ¡ Topics: 69
Posted by bkbella86

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by Black-Mamba

Do not delete your profile. Crabs like a challenge. We don't like anything too easy.

By the way i thought i have up on caps

But my cap friend is so funny. Omg he's so cold the way he talks shit about ppl

I just die

It really made me want to sleep with him

But we've made out before on one drunken night

But man i laughed a good 2 hours

I loved how he was able to get me out of my head

Damn, if I had known this I'd kept it up...but I honestly wasn't using it lately after going on a date with her.

A little situation backstory about me. About 1 month ago, I had a pregnancy scare with a ONS. Condom broke. It was just a mess for an entire week, from us being supportive of each other and texting for the first few days and me getting the plan B, to her not being responsive until she charged me on Venmo for $ 350 because "her gynecologist said she lost eggs due to what happened." It was super stressful, and I took it as God's and the Universe's way of telling me I should try to look for something with more substance when it comes to the opposite sex.

So that's where I'm at now. I've never had a relationship, and some things about it really scare me, but I think I'm finally ready to try. Retrograde Aquarius FTW.


Lmaooo she lost eggs and that’s your fault? Wtf

How? How did she even know this?
click to expand



MF is deep init? Talk about game.
Profile picture of bkbella86
bkbella86
@bkbella86
14 Years5,000+ PostsAries

Comments: 3 ¡ Posts: 7849 ¡ Topics: 52
Posted by Yodi

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by Yodi

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by Yodi

Posted by GOATAction

Yeah, I got the text that confirmed my fears (and those ITT). After I texted her saying her thoughts on a particular third date, she texted me and said "she had a good time, but doesn't feel we're a good fit." For reference, I'm 28, she's 24. She's kind of still into the party scene (just got her Master's) and probably goes out about every weekend. Me? I don't mind having a good time and occasionally clubbing, but I'm content to be an introvert and focus on life/career goals. Small circle of friends.

I guess I just don't get why a person does and says things, but they ultimately hold little to no meaning. Just about everything I say and do has intent and can be taken to the bank.

I think I'm just too heavy, and scare some people and women off and make them uneasy. No one likes a super realistic/kind of pessimistic person, which I've said I am to her twice. Maybe I'm too self-aware also, and rather put out my shortcomings so that people get a solid idea of me and accept me for who I am. Venus natal retrograde for the loss smh lol.

Well, back to the dating apps.


Fux her.. you'll find better.

I'm curious to know what did you guys talk about during your last date? Did something awkward happen that your leaving out? And do you put yourself down in front of her? What do you mean by your too heavy?

There was one convo about her choosing to be optimistic in everything she does and comes across. I think this was in response to me saying how I'm typically more of a grounded individual who focuses more on the half empty side of things. I didn't think this was awkward but maybe it was. I told her I liked that about her and that I need more of that in my approach.

I don't put myself down in front of people. But, I like to give them a picture of who I am, and I'd rather put the stuff out there I'm less confident about and get that on the table.

Honestly, this article pretty much describes me to a T, https://cafeastrology.com/articles/capricornmanlove.html

Basically, I don't like defining astrology for everything (and I don't), but after really getting into my chart this year, I've deduced I'm a "heavy" individual. Uber dependable and tons of substance, but maybe a little too much. Sun, Mercury, Saturn, Uranus, and Neptune in Capricorn, all of those planets in 8th minus Sun in 9th. Moon in Virgo, Venus in cool/detached Aquarius. Sometimes I feel like an alien lol.

Retrograded planets in Mercury, Venus, and Jupiter. Being "light" doesn't come easily for me.


Yeah.. the way you explained it doesn't seem cringeworthy enough to cut you off.. maybe you're negative without realizing it? How did you respond to her text? Maybe she's testing you? Did you reactivate your account before or after that text?

I get that this is an astrology forum but don't let that sh!!t define you.. if there's something you don't like about yourself then change it.. for you tho.. not for anybody else. I hate to say this but she probably has someone else or just pushing you away to focus on life and something you did or said turned her off and made her put her walls back up.. it's hard to tell.

Anywhoo.. My moon is in 8th but idk wtf it means 🤷🏿‍♀️ I have nothing in the 9th.



The 8th house is a heavy house. Death, depths, hidden power, sexuality. I've got a stellium here, I think it kind of draws the opposite sex to me easy. Capricorn is a heavy/cold sign. Pair these two together and I'm not predisposed to be the stuff of suns and rainbows.

I completely deleted my profiles. Unfriended her on facebook. Told her I think we could be a great fit and that I'd be open to trying again, but the choice is hers. I try to detach professionally and cordially now, which is something I didn't do years ago.

If she's testing me, I'm not about it. I rarely enjoy mind games. I've no time for them. I'll never understand women and why someone would do this. If she knew she wasn't about me, I don't get the compliments and the kissing.


Death?! As in we like it or is surrounded by it? How do I find my stellium?..

hmm caps come off as cold but I know better.. if you guys are into someone you'll open up quick but the heavy and the controlling part.. I get

my cap bestie doesn't see how she can turn a man off during the early stages of dating but then when things end she'll secretly blame her physical appearance instead of working on her inner self.. she'll spend money on things to enhance her look ( clothes, hair etc.)

I don't get it because she's only knew the guy for a week and fail to realize she's placing too much pressure on someone she doesn't even know.. why give a stranger so much power over you 🙄🤔

I could see why you feel like she played you but.. how else would she have known ya'll wasn't going to work out unless she dated you?

I'm in a similar situation as you but we've been kickin it for a little over 2 months and I still don't know if I want to be his gf.. I was extremely attracted to him in the beginning but something changed.. it has to do with his personality and the way he handles certain situations.

Crabs play games I'm not going to sit here and lie to you and we're also moody asf.. if I sent that text during one of my episodes and you responded by deleting me everywhere I'd think you never liked me to begin with and only wanted me for my looks.. deadass that's how I'd feel.. even if I pulled the trigger 😅 we (or me) like fighters/ riders.. I have to know how much of me you can handle before I completely let you in.

click to expand



Bs games that hurt people. Not cool.
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bkbella86
@bkbella86
14 Years5,000+ PostsAries

Comments: 3 ¡ Posts: 7849 ¡ Topics: 52
Posted by VenusAquarius

Posted by bkbella86

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by Black-Mamba

Do not delete your profile. Crabs like a challenge. We don't like anything too easy.

By the way i thought i have up on caps

But my cap friend is so funny. Omg he's so cold the way he talks shit about ppl

I just die

It really made me want to sleep with him

But we've made out before on one drunken night

But man i laughed a good 2 hours

I loved how he was able to get me out of my head

Damn, if I had known this I'd kept it up...but I honestly wasn't using it lately after going on a date with her.

A little situation backstory about me. About 1 month ago, I had a pregnancy scare with a ONS. Condom broke. It was just a mess for an entire week, from us being supportive of each other and texting for the first few days and me getting the plan B, to her not being responsive until she charged me on Venmo for $ 350 because "her gynecologist said she lost eggs due to what happened." It was super stressful, and I took it as God's and the Universe's way of telling me I should try to look for something with more substance when it comes to the opposite sex.

So that's where I'm at now. I've never had a relationship, and some things about it really scare me, but I think I'm finally ready to try. Retrograde Aquarius FTW.


Lmaooo she lost eggs and that’s your fault? Wtf

How? How did she even know this?


MF is deep init? Talk about game.
click to expand



Girllll
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Yodi
@Yodi
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 1491 ¡ Posts: 3532 ¡ Topics: 2
Posted by bkbella86

Posted by Yodi

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by Yodi

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by Yodi

Posted by GOATAction

Yeah, I got the text that confirmed my fears (and those ITT). After I texted her saying her thoughts on a particular third date, she texted me and said "she had a good time, but doesn't feel we're a good fit." For reference, I'm 28, she's 24. She's kind of still into the party scene (just got her Master's) and probably goes out about every weekend. Me? I don't mind having a good time and occasionally clubbing, but I'm content to be an introvert and focus on life/career goals. Small circle of friends.

I guess I just don't get why a person does and says things, but they ultimately hold little to no meaning. Just about everything I say and do has intent and can be taken to the bank.

I think I'm just too heavy, and scare some people and women off and make them uneasy. No one likes a super realistic/kind of pessimistic person, which I've said I am to her twice. Maybe I'm too self-aware also, and rather put out my shortcomings so that people get a solid idea of me and accept me for who I am. Venus natal retrograde for the loss smh lol.

Well, back to the dating apps.


Fux her.. you'll find better.

I'm curious to know what did you guys talk about during your last date? Did something awkward happen that your leaving out? And do you put yourself down in front of her? What do you mean by your too heavy?

There was one convo about her choosing to be optimistic in everything she does and comes across. I think this was in response to me saying how I'm typically more of a grounded individual who focuses more on the half empty side of things. I didn't think this was awkward but maybe it was. I told her I liked that about her and that I need more of that in my approach.

I don't put myself down in front of people. But, I like to give them a picture of who I am, and I'd rather put the stuff out there I'm less confident about and get that on the table.

Honestly, this article pretty much describes me to a T, https://cafeastrology.com/articles/capricornmanlove.html

Basically, I don't like defining astrology for everything (and I don't), but after really getting into my chart this year, I've deduced I'm a "heavy" individual. Uber dependable and tons of substance, but maybe a little too much. Sun, Mercury, Saturn, Uranus, and Neptune in Capricorn, all of those planets in 8th minus Sun in 9th. Moon in Virgo, Venus in cool/detached Aquarius. Sometimes I feel like an alien lol.

Retrograded planets in Mercury, Venus, and Jupiter. Being "light" doesn't come easily for me.


Yeah.. the way you explained it doesn't seem cringeworthy enough to cut you off.. maybe you're negative without realizing it? How did you respond to her text? Maybe she's testing you? Did you reactivate your account before or after that text?

I get that this is an astrology forum but don't let that sh!!t define you.. if there's something you don't like about yourself then change it.. for you tho.. not for anybody else. I hate to say this but she probably has someone else or just pushing you away to focus on life and something you did or said turned her off and made her put her walls back up.. it's hard to tell.

Anywhoo.. My moon is in 8th but idk wtf it means 🤷🏿‍♀️ I have nothing in the 9th.



The 8th house is a heavy house. Death, depths, hidden power, sexuality. I've got a stellium here, I think it kind of draws the opposite sex to me easy. Capricorn is a heavy/cold sign. Pair these two together and I'm not predisposed to be the stuff of suns and rainbows.

I completely deleted my profiles. Unfriended her on facebook. Told her I think we could be a great fit and that I'd be open to trying again, but the choice is hers. I try to detach professionally and cordially now, which is something I didn't do years ago.

If she's testing me, I'm not about it. I rarely enjoy mind games. I've no time for them. I'll never understand women and why someone would do this. If she knew she wasn't about me, I don't get the compliments and the kissing.


Death?! As in we like it or is surrounded by it? How do I find my stellium?..

hmm caps come off as cold but I know better.. if you guys are into someone you'll open up quick but the heavy and the controlling part.. I get

my cap bestie doesn't see how she can turn a man off during the early stages of dating but then when things end she'll secretly blame her physical appearance instead of working on her inner self.. she'll spend money on things to enhance her look ( clothes, hair etc.)

I don't get it because she's only knew the guy for a week and fail to realize she's placing too much pressure on someone she doesn't even know.. why give a stranger so much power over you 🙄🤔

I could see why you feel like she played you but.. how else would she have known ya'll wasn't going to work out unless she dated you?

I'm in a similar situation as you but we've been kickin it for a little over 2 months and I still don't know if I want to be his gf.. I was extremely attracted to him in the beginning but something changed.. it has to do with his personality and the way he handles certain situations.

Crabs play games I'm not going to sit here and lie to you and we're also moody asf.. if I sent that text during one of my episodes and you responded by deleting me everywhere I'd think you never liked me to begin with and only wanted me for my looks.. deadass that's how I'd feel.. even if I pulled the trigger 😅 we (or me) like fighters/ riders.. I have to know how much of me you can handle before I completely let you in.




Bs games that hurt people. Not cool.
click to expand



Meh.. nobodies perfect. This is my truth
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Yodi
@Yodi
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 1491 ¡ Posts: 3532 ¡ Topics: 2
Posted by Black-Mamba

We like riders/ fighters—

Funny that at the first sign of emotional hurt we're the first ones to escape

That's wanting alot for not being able to provide the same

A person can only ride/ fight for someone so much before they're out of good intentions


Yup.. I like a fighter.

To catch me you have to show me you are willing to stick it out with me amongst other things. If I'm in love nothing will cause me to leave my man unless he cheats.. I'll get mad and want space for other issues but I don't escape.
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Yodi
@Yodi
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 1491 ¡ Posts: 3532 ¡ Topics: 2
Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by Yodi

Posted by Black-Mamba

We like riders/ fighters—

Funny that at the first sign of emotional hurt we're the first ones to escape

That's wanting alot for not being able to provide the same

A person can only ride/ fight for someone so much before they're out of good intentions


Yup.. I like a fighter.

To catch me you have to show me you are willing to stick it out with me amongst other things. If I'm in love nothing will cause me to leave my man unless he cheats.. I'll get mad and want space for other issues but I don't escape.




I think that's every person tho
click to expand



Naw.. if I say "every person" then other crabs will claim something different and blah blah blah.
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GOATAction
@GOATAction
7 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 0 ¡ Posts: 726 ¡ Topics: 29
Posted by Black-Mamba

Posted by GOATAction

Yeah, I got the text that confirmed my fears (and those ITT). After I texted her saying her thoughts on a particular third date, she texted me and said "she had a good time, but doesn't feel we're a good fit." For reference, I'm 28, she's 24. She's kind of still into the party scene (just got her Master's) and probably goes out about every weekend. Me? I don't mind having a good time and occasionally clubbing, but I'm content to be an introvert and focus on life/career goals. Small circle of friends.

I guess I just don't get why a person does and says things, but they ultimately hold little to no meaning. Just about everything I say and do has intent and can be taken to the bank.

I think I'm just too heavy, and scare some people and women off and make them uneasy. No one likes a super realistic/kind of pessimistic person, which I've said I am to her twice. Maybe I'm too self-aware also, and rather put out my shortcomings so that people get a solid idea of me and accept me for who I am. Venus natal retrograde for the loss smh lol.

Well, back to the dating apps.


She's young in her prime. This isn't a crab thing but a young woman thing.

I'm sorry it didn't work out, but maybe you're just too together for her

Crabs have to suffer alot too find happiness

We're kind of stupid about relationships
click to expand


Technically I'm in my prime too at 28. But, after going through that situation, it's kind of spurred me to look for something real, try to give my heart a little more.
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GOATAction
@GOATAction
7 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 0 ¡ Posts: 726 ¡ Topics: 29
Posted by bkbella86

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by CancerAquaSagg

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by pinkbird03

Ask her what she wants to do. Then do that.

She planned the 2nd date. I kind of feel like if there's a 3rd, I should do the planning. And, I often don't feel pressed on a timeline situation, but I'm gonna methodically plan to go back to my place, watch a movie, cuddle, and see what happens there.


Either be aloof or dominant. But not pushy like a desperate puppy you know?

In the dates I've been pretty dominant. Going in for the kiss, paying most of the bills, etc.


Most of the bill?
click to expand


1st date: I paid all ( $ 40, I almost always pay on 1st date)

2nd date: Got the car ride, picked her up, and paid for a few drinks. Only thing she paid for was drinks because she lost our competition lol.
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GOATAction
@GOATAction
7 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 0 ¡ Posts: 726 ¡ Topics: 29
Posted by Ellygant

Don’t take the loss heavy.

Cancers are great, long time fangirl here. I notice that with the exception of those who don’t marry their first loves, a majority don’t get too committed until they’re older. They spend most of their time giving to their friends and family and putting their own love lives on the back burner at best or using relationships as fuel to their ego at worst. Especially if she’s is still partying. Young water signs like drama, thinking it’s the only kind of passion there is. And unless there’s is a dominant air influence in their chart as well, a lot love people that are very unavailable to or detached from them until they finally learn to love themselves first, before family, before career and before romance.

As for you, you are not too serious or pessimistic for love. Someone will be enamoured by these qualities in you, they’ll smile big and goofy at them and flirt over them. Maybe it’ll be another cancer too, who is a better fit for your vibe. You’re a cap, keep climbing and keep on, you guys shine under those circumstance. You got it.

I honestly just think I caught her at the wrong time. She's only been in two relationships, one while she was in college and she was in it for most of her college career. Looking under the scope of that, she probably doesn't want anything serious now.

Typically, I don't go for anything super serious, but this pregnancy scare I had has kind of pushed me to begin trying to open up more with women and not be so scared/fearful of being with someone in a relationship.
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GOATAction
@GOATAction
7 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 0 ¡ Posts: 726 ¡ Topics: 29
Posted by bkbella86

Posted by GOATAction

Thought it went really well, but slightly skeptical of a 3rd date happening.

We went to do an indoor putt-putt in black light. Looked super childish but it was actually very fun. Was 18 holes, I won, and we kissed a little after that (and she initiated it!) Had a beer there, talked a little, then took a walk to another bar where we had an app and a few drinks. Got a little deeper with our convo, we were both laughing, light teasing about stuff. Complimented her on her smarts and beauty, she complimented me on my eyes and lashes, said I had "Jake Gyllenhaal" looks in them.

Rode home in a Lyft, had the driver drop her off at her pad first. I stepped out, hugged, and kissed her some more. She left for home earlier today, but is typically kind of responsive. Chatted her asking if she got home safe, she did she says. Then, texted her saying I had a great time, and that I'm looking forward to the next date, already got some plans in mind. No response, but, she did accept my FB friend request (she sent me one on Instagram a few days ago to which I finally accepted yesterday---not on often).

I think I'll get another date and she's just busy with the family today, she did say yesterday her and the mom and sibs would be watching football and going shopping, so, I think I'll be aight. I just overthink things a lot that aren't my career lol 😢 and I'm more pessimistic than optimistic.

Got some plans but what do you guys suggest for a 3rd date? Leaning towards doing something around my apt like a wine tasting or something, then going back to it and watching a movie.


A house date after getting her liquored up for a third date? Seems too fast to me. Why are you thinking of that?
click to expand


Figured the sex would have drawn her closer to me.
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GOATAction
@GOATAction
7 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 0 ¡ Posts: 726 ¡ Topics: 29
Posted by bkbella86

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by Black-Mamba

Do not delete your profile. Crabs like a challenge. We don't like anything too easy.

By the way i thought i have up on caps

But my cap friend is so funny. Omg he's so cold the way he talks shit about ppl

I just die

It really made me want to sleep with him

But we've made out before on one drunken night

But man i laughed a good 2 hours

I loved how he was able to get me out of my head

Damn, if I had known this I'd kept it up...but I honestly wasn't using it lately after going on a date with her.

A little situation backstory about me. About 1 month ago, I had a pregnancy scare with a ONS. Condom broke. It was just a mess for an entire week, from us being supportive of each other and texting for the first few days and me getting the plan B, to her not being responsive until she charged me on Venmo for $ 350 because "her gynecologist said she lost eggs due to what happened." It was super stressful, and I took it as God's and the Universe's way of telling me I should try to look for something with more substance when it comes to the opposite sex.

So that's where I'm at now. I've never had a relationship, and some things about it really scare me, but I think I'm finally ready to try. Retrograde Aquarius FTW.


Lmaooo she lost eggs and that’s your fault? Wtf



How? How did she even know this?
click to expand


Told me she went to her gyno who said this. Honestly, I just fuxd with a crazy person. She's bisexual, her IG seems to point to her leaning towards women, looks like she's in a relationship now with one. I'm guessing she just wanted me that one night, and wanted to see if she could get money out of me.
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GOATAction
@GOATAction
7 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 0 ¡ Posts: 726 ¡ Topics: 29
Posted by solidsnake

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by solidsnake

Cancers w9men dont normally stick with men who are overly nice & emotional. I guess they figure they carry enough emotions for 2. They kinda like guys who are nice but rude at the same time. I think youd be better off with taurus or pisces. Thry are more lovey dovey sensitivo

Well, my sense of humor is pretty dry and dark tho lol.


Cancers also have dark sense of humor, just not dry. I think cancers like when you show passion behind your words and actions. Caps can be this way but they have to be comfortable first.

P.s. never take advice from other cancer women on dating cancer women. They will have you getting used & abused.
click to expand


Yeah. I live my life with discipline, duty, and dedication/loyalty. But I wouldn't call it passionate or emotional living. I'm trying, but it doesn't come easy.
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Yodi
@Yodi
7 Years1,000+ Posts

Comments: 1491 ¡ Posts: 3532 ¡ Topics: 2
Posted by solidsnake

Posted by GOATAction

Posted by solidsnake

Cancers w9men dont normally stick with men who are overly nice & emotional. I guess they figure they carry enough emotions for 2. They kinda like guys who are nice but rude at the same time. I think youd be better off with taurus or pisces. Thry are more lovey dovey sensitivo

Well, my sense of humor is pretty dry and dark tho lol.


Cancers also have dark sense of humor, just not dry. I think cancers like when you show passion behind your words and actions. Caps can be this way but they have to be comfortable first.

P.s. never take advice from other cancer women on dating cancer women. They will have you getting used & abused.
click to expand



😌🖕🏿

Yeah You're the one to talk..
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