TaurusFlower22
@TaurusFlower22
8 Years500+ Posts
Comments: 64 · Posts: 525 · Topics: 21
It's Been a Month...
Darling. You ended it! How could he not take it personally?
Posted by GemitatiBecause it seemed like that's what he wanted!
Darling. You ended it! How could he not take it personally?
You did the right thing. Guys don’t typically seek out friendships from girls, so when there is a breakup, the guy sees no point in continuing a friendship because it never really was one. An excellent read that helped me is “why men love bitches” you get to see the guys perspective.
Posted by MoonbutterI read that. But, a woman wrote that book.
You did the right thing. Guys don’t typically seek out friendships from girls, so when there is a breakup, the guy sees no point in continuing a friendship because it never really was one. An excellent read that helped me is “why men love bitches” you get to see the guys perspective.
I feel you though. Just kinda disappointed in the whole situation.
Posted by TaurusFlower22You can’t be sure! You made a hard choice based on what you thought he wanted! What if you thought wrong and he is deeply hurt and now just wondering why...Posted by GemitatiBecause it seemed like that's what he wanted!
Darling. You ended it! How could he not take it personally?click to expand
And you said also it was YOU who wasn’t ready.
So what is it really?
Posted by GemitatiHe said he didn't want me to leave him alone, but that he thinks it's what's best, considering his wants and mine.Posted by TaurusFlower22You can’t be sure! You made a hard choice based on what you thought he wanted! What if you thought wrong and he is deeply hurt and now just wondering why...Posted by GemitatiBecause it seemed like that's what he wanted!
Darling. You ended it! How could he not take it personally?
And you said also it was YOU who wasn’t ready.
So what is it really?click to expand
He said he eventually wanted a committed relationship with me.
I think that's a pile of crap, and if after almost a year of waiting, someone doesn't put forth any effort, they are bullshitting.
Aye.
I don't mean to be insensitive, because I know the pain.. But I'ma saying this plain.
Don't believe that he ever saw you in his future. Dude was just lonely. Everybody needs somebody, you know? You just happened to be the one available for him.
The best thing you have done is stopped contact. Constantly conversing and talking it out doesn't do anything but worsen the the conditions of the relations you two shared.
You on the right path. You need healing. If you he didn't want all of you, he had no business fucking with you.
That's only cool when it's a mutual agreement. So breaking it off was good for the both of you. You don't wanna drive him up a wall, and you don't wanna drive yourself crazy.
You made the decision to walk away. Don't look back at this.. It's DONE. It's dead.
If he comes back into your life, it's simply because he's curious and he has to see what's going on.
Everybody does that to people they haven't heard from. Never take someone's announcement personally. They are there for themselves, not you.
Fast healing and finding the light should be where your head is. Keep reading books, but don't become a structured woman through them.. It hurts you more than it helps, trust me. So just follow your heart if someone new is there for you.
Sometimes we gotta let go of beautiful things, but if it made you feel bad.. Was it really that beautiful?
I don't mean to be insensitive, because I know the pain.. But I'ma saying this plain.
Don't believe that he ever saw you in his future. Dude was just lonely. Everybody needs somebody, you know? You just happened to be the one available for him.
The best thing you have done is stopped contact. Constantly conversing and talking it out doesn't do anything but worsen the the conditions of the relations you two shared.
You on the right path. You need healing. If you he didn't want all of you, he had no business fucking with you.
That's only cool when it's a mutual agreement. So breaking it off was good for the both of you. You don't wanna drive him up a wall, and you don't wanna drive yourself crazy.
You made the decision to walk away. Don't look back at this.. It's DONE. It's dead.
If he comes back into your life, it's simply because he's curious and he has to see what's going on.
Everybody does that to people they haven't heard from. Never take someone's announcement personally. They are there for themselves, not you.
Fast healing and finding the light should be where your head is. Keep reading books, but don't become a structured woman through them.. It hurts you more than it helps, trust me. So just follow your heart if someone new is there for you.
Sometimes we gotta let go of beautiful things, but if it made you feel bad.. Was it really that beautiful?
So basically you just wanted the title?
Did yall act like a couple? How did he seem like he wanted it to end?
Did yall act like a couple? How did he seem like he wanted it to end?
Posted by YodiYep! The title and him making consistent time for me were important to me. However, he did neither. We'd see each other daily at 1st. Then, maybe like once a month, if that. He'd constantly make plans and then flake. I cannot stand flakey shit. Like, respect my time.
So basically you just wanted the title?
Did yall act like a couple? How did he seem like he wanted it to end?
But, he always told me how much he likes me ("I like you in extreme amounts of like" lol), and yes when we were actually together, we acted exactly like a couple.
Watch videos my Matthew Hussey on You Tube, that guy is a relationship genius and really hits home about how to set your standards in relationships, how to deal with flaky guys and guys that aren't actually investing in the relationship.
Posted by WildatHeartOmg, I've seen a couple of his YouTube vids. Love him! Forgot about him. Lol thanks, I'll check out his new stuff. 😊
Watch videos my Matthew Hussey on You Tube, that guy is a relationship genius and really hits home about how to set your standards in relationships, how to deal with flaky guys and guys that aren't actually investing in the relationship.
Posted by TaurusFlower22Just know that it could be very possible that he was in love with you or that he loved you but wasn't emotionally mature enough to express that to you. I know it's very painful, but you did the right thing.
It's been a month since I contacted the Cancer man. I ended things with him like a week prior because I wanted a relationship, and he "wasn't ready" for one after almost a year of the casual thing we had going on.
I miss him. But, I guess he doesn't miss me. After leaving him alone and reading "Women Who Love Too Much" by Robin Norwood, I realize that I'm not ready for a relationship. I need time to heal, so I no longer attract the type of men who aren't ready/aren't sure.
I really didn't think he'd take me ending it so personally that he would just disappear completely and not even want a friendship. But, I guess he has.
I'm not going to contact him, but it's just really unfortunate and heartbreaking.
Posted by taurusgirl9000I'm very confident that he loved me. I felt it. He showed it in so many ways, when we were actually together. And I love him too...very deeply.Posted by TaurusFlower22Just know that it could be very possible that he was in love with you or that he loved you but wasn't emotionally mature enough to express that to you. I know it's very painful, but you did the right thing.
It's been a month since I contacted the Cancer man. I ended things with him like a week prior because I wanted a relationship, and he "wasn't ready" for one after almost a year of the casual thing we had going on.
I miss him. But, I guess he doesn't miss me. After leaving him alone and reading "Women Who Love Too Much" by Robin Norwood, I realize that I'm not ready for a relationship. I need time to heal, so I no longer attract the type of men who aren't ready/aren't sure.
I really didn't think he'd take me ending it so personally that he would just disappear completely and not even want a friendship. But, I guess he has.
I'm not going to contact him, but it's just really unfortunate and heartbreaking.click to expand
But, I had to be upfront about my needs. I had to put those first. I'm not about to wait around for any man to decide he wants to make me a priority.
But, this hurts like hell. Especially because I occasionally creep on his social (he deleted me from everything after I ended things), and he posts things about him not being ok and trying to learn to unlove someone.
I was hoping he'd still want to be in my life. But, I guess not.
Posted by justagirlwithdreamsLol I'm laughing because you're absolutely right. That's exactly what he did! He tried to play the victim and definitely blamed me for everything in not so nice ways actually. He even accused me of "spending time" with other men. He said he believes that's why I ended things, to make myself feel better about spending time with these men. 😂
Dear TaurusFlower22, I know the type of man this cancer man is. Actually, this man is trying to play the victim here and blaming things on you in a rather nice way. Just leave him already. He doesn't deserve you.
Looking on the flip side, whatever happens, happens for a reason. Had you two ended up together, he would have fed you crap for the major part of your life. Enjoy your life dear. There's so much more. The best is yet to come. My best wishes.
Truth is, other men would approach me. But I was very loyal. I hadn't been with any other man since meeting him...even though we weren't officially together. Still haven't. We had agreed on exclusivity.
Posted by justagirlwithdreamsWe did have an argument. It lasted days. He is a poet, and his words are very powerful. He knows how to hurt me with them when he wants to. That's what I learned from that argument. Also learned how insecure he is...very! And insecure men can be unpredictable and even dangerous at worst.
Actually, I was about to say the same thing. The fact that you choose to see the best part of him(even if it was a nill amount) already speaks volumes about your loyalty. Earlier, you mentioned in one of your posts that you 'felt' he actually loved you. He might have. But he allowed his insecurities take over him and act irrationally. Yes, that's what he is. INSECURE. I sense that you two definitely exchanged a heated argument during your break up and in the process, he stated his defences (which were actually baseless) all the while making you the culprit. As if it was because of you, he did that particular thing. And dear this is known as making someone feel guilty. He knows he possess that kind of power over you. He knows his words will pinch your heart. And he's taking advantage of it.
Posted by justagirlwithdreamsThat's going to be difficult...the mentally blocking him. Idk if I can. I know I should. Hopefully time will make this easier.
So please do yourself a favor and stop any kond of contacts with him. He's a toxic person. He brings negativity into your life. Try to mentally block him and enjoy the peace. Good luck.
Oh! And just for the record, I like your eyes. 😉
And thank you! People always tell me they're "intense". LOL
Posted by TaurusFlower22Okay.Posted by YodiYep! The title and him making consistent time for me were important to me. However, he did neither. We'd see each other daily at 1st. Then, maybe like once a month, if that. He'd constantly make plans and then flake. I cannot stand flakey shit. Like, respect my time.
So basically you just wanted the title?
Did yall act like a couple? How did he seem like he wanted it to end?
But, he always told me how much he likes me ("I like you in extreme amounts of like" lol), and yes when we were actually together, we acted exactly like a couple.click to expand
You need to completely erase him from your life.. no more staking on social media.
Posted by TaurusFlower22Posted by MoonbutterI read that. But, a woman wrote that book.
You did the right thing. Guys don’t typically seek out friendships from girls, so when there is a breakup, the guy sees no point in continuing a friendship because it never really was one. An excellent read that helped me is “why men love bitches” you get to see the guys perspective.
I feel you though. Just kinda disappointed in the whole situation.click to expand
I went through similar... insecure guy turned toxic for me and I had to decide if I loved him more then myself. It was super hard, but the best thing to leave him, heal and find the amazing man I’m with now who I don’t have to be in a state of confusion or misled. You will find that too, it’s just unfortunate sometimes we need to end up in these toxic relationships to appreciate the good ones, but it’s worth it 😊
What I learned with the cancer man is that if he truly loves you his actions would show so much you don’t need a title because you already know he’s committed in your case I think he really likes you and care about you but he doesn’t love you yet because I cancer who loves someone is afraid to lose that someone . The first 2 years I was with my cancer and thought he loved me , he was emotionally not really for a relationship and kept saying one day . 4 years later it wasn’t until this last year that looking back I realized he only started loving me now . Because you feel so strongly it’s easy to think the other person feel the same . And then you break up with them and they play victim like the above said and think you’re even more sure that if he is hurting like that he must love you .
This cancer really like she you . Until he realize and begin to love you , that’s the only time they’ll commit . Unfortunately he’s not there yet and you’re ready for that commitment so walking away was the right thing to do . Men aren’t good liars when he let you go because he didn’t think he could live up to your need he wasn’t lying .
Stop reading those to try to analyze where you went wrong . Take it as you were in a different place and it didn’t work . Start healing . Mentally do a no contact . You don’t think about where he is or what he’s doing or how he’s feeling. It doesn’t matter anymore
This cancer really like she you . Until he realize and begin to love you , that’s the only time they’ll commit . Unfortunately he’s not there yet and you’re ready for that commitment so walking away was the right thing to do . Men aren’t good liars when he let you go because he didn’t think he could live up to your need he wasn’t lying .
Stop reading those to try to analyze where you went wrong . Take it as you were in a different place and it didn’t work . Start healing . Mentally do a no contact . You don’t think about where he is or what he’s doing or how he’s feeling. It doesn’t matter anymore
Thank you guys. You're right. I know you're right. It's soooo much easier said than done. There's something or someone that always reminds me of him whenever I try to mentally let go.
This morning, I got a friend request from a man on fb. I saw that we had lile 6 friends in common, so I accepted. He sent me a few dms.
Once I accepted, I was able to see his family members section. Lo and behold, his brother is, you guessed it...Cancer man. -____-
I'm not from this state. Just moved here about 2 years ago, so I know very few people. But yep, that's his half brother.
Someone upstairs is having a good laugh. This feels like a cruel joke. Lol
This morning, I got a friend request from a man on fb. I saw that we had lile 6 friends in common, so I accepted. He sent me a few dms.
Once I accepted, I was able to see his family members section. Lo and behold, his brother is, you guessed it...Cancer man. -____-
I'm not from this state. Just moved here about 2 years ago, so I know very few people. But yep, that's his half brother.
Someone upstairs is having a good laugh. This feels like a cruel joke. Lol
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I miss him. But, I guess he doesn't miss me. After leaving him alone and reading "Women Who Love Too Much" by Robin Norwood, I realize that I'm not ready for a relationship. I need time to heal, so I no longer attract the type of men who aren't ready/aren't sure.
I really didn't think he'd take me ending it so personally that he would just disappear completely and not even want a friendship. But, I guess he has.
I'm not going to contact him, but it's just really unfortunate and heartbreaking.