oh fu**, let me announce (Page 2)

Posted by M
The words he utters should turn to dust the moment they leave his lips. Do what you must to regroup, but he no longer has a part in this play. Period.

Only one tub of ice cream? I don't see the harm in two 😉 Merry Christmas FUM

awwww thank you, M 😄

*hugs*

Sorry...


Merry Christmas to you too, M. Merry Christmas to all of you who celebrate 😄

yeah this guy sounds horrible, and hopefully you have learned from this.

I'm a capguy and I would NEVER use anyone. Sorry that is not in my nature. this guy is a dick.

back. it got ugly.

I asked him when the ex came to his apartment. He turned his back and walked. I cursed at him. He said, she didn't come to his place. I asked, how come she is effing his downstair neighbour in the whole city she found your downstair neighbour— he said, leave me along. I left. then he called me.. are you crazy? she was never here... I will call her while you are with me and ask to her face directly... don't listen to this person or that person.. I will give you proof... i don't want her blah blah blah

Posted by FUMRedFairy_tales
back. it got ugly.

I asked him when the ex came to his apartment. He turned his back and walked. I cursed at him. He said, she didn't come to his place. I asked, how come she is effing his downstair neighbour in the whole city she found your downstair neighbour— he said, leave me along. I left. then he called me.. are you crazy? she was never here... I will call her while you are with me and ask to her face directly... don't listen to this person or that person.. I will give you proof... i don't want her blah blah blah

*sigh*

He still has you. Earlier, I wrote that they don't understand this type of emotional reaction/questioning, but really, they understand it too well. He knows that when you are really done you won't need an answer or explanation because you will no longer care. At this rate, he will be able to wiggle himself back in in no time. Good luck with everything.

elle dear... the Libra in me i seriously do not like lately.


the computer issue you brought up on why he gave such time bomb into my hands... and he KNOWS.. i caught him with the computer before.

He had this virus that wouldn't let you get into windows desktop. We tried many ways in getting to his desktop, but it wouldn't work. I suggested instead of trying to get rid of the virus, just to format the computer. Do you have anything important in there? he said, no. That is why he wasn't concerned giving it to me. But I didn't expect him to just run with it and he also wrote me down his password, etc. I found that cute 😛 (libra speaking 😉 )

I fixed the computer without having to format it. He still doesn't know how I got behind all that info. He thinks the ex contacted me.. it doesn't register yet.

But I didn't want to just openly write it out on here, because some naughty boyz may want to use tactics to get away from being caught? 😛

dearest elle,

what you wrote I read over and over again. I may keep repeating myself but your description of us is so flawlessly fitting. We have so much in common. For sure you described me. In this case, being giving has become a mistake for me.

This time, I wanted to make sure that I asked all those things if he can give me, the loyalty, devotion and love. He didn't just respond with a 'yes', but he also described me the latest changes in his life. The last 2 months, he has been following a life choice for himself, consisting of work and income status. He said, i'm done with looking for women on websites and all. He said, he wants to get his life straightened out. He doesn't even go on msn anymore.


I don't want to go on too much, because my Libra Venus may play tricks with me again. What I'm trying to do is to remember our times at the beginning of this year, which keeps me angry at him and my head straight. Today I could just sleep all day, but life is calling. It's Christmas time 🙂 and I have to get into the spirit with friends, which is quite hard to do.

Thank you all. Take good care of yourselves.

i don't know where to start.

Capman wrote me a couple of days ago.

I wrote back saying leave me alone.

He called tonight.

I didn't pick up.

He makes me feel sick.


Should I face him or just ignore??

I don't know if ignoring is an adult solution. But I'm so sick of everything.

Ignore. If you can get your number changed do it.

Dear FUM,

Oh lawrdy babes. You have gotten yourself into a pickle. I know it well and I can always see it from the outside but never the inside. From your original post I was already thinking "this can't be good" and well it wasn't, but as it was stated before... you knew way before you asked him to love you.

Unfortunately you fell into the trap of... if he says he loves me then he's not this jerk my subconscious knows him to be, nope, if he says that three word phrase he becomes the man I wrote the story about. You know that man, the one who you made all the excuses for? The one that had to be there to take place of all the uneasiness your subconscious was throwing at you. All the "I love you" was going to do was act as a band-aid to shut your subconscious up for a little longer. It was a control mechanism on your part.

If you had taken things for as they are, recognized that inner voice that was shouting for you to run and punched the one that was telling you there was a reason or an excuse... you wouldn't be here, recovering from a lost love and betrayal. When it comes to a partner male, female, canine, plastic inflatable, what have you... LISTEN TO YOUR TRUE SELF. You always know best for you, you just convince yourself you don't.

Thankfully we are all hardwired with that resource, unfortunately we also learn self deprecation and many other wonderful tools to convince ourselves that we're wrong and that if we just stick it out, give chances, whatever.... that it will all turn out like that fairy tale we have written up in our heads.

I'm so sorry you are here and hurting. I hope you listen to yourself from here on out and send that doucher to the planet of people who don't exist anymore. Speaking of fantasy stories in our heads I gotta run, I think that was a knock at the door and I'm sure it's the Pisces I'm seeing. I'm sure he's here with dozens of roses, his heart on his sleeve and a pretty blue box that I'm quite sure says Tiffany's on it. I wonder if his white horse is tired and thirsty from his long journey and if his armor needs polishing.

*HUGS*

I picked up his call. Quarter to 1 am he called again. We were on the phone for about 20 minutes and neither him nor I spoke. I didn't know what to say except for 'what do you want?'. He asked me what I do for new years. I said, nothing. I don't feel up to anything, am staying home. We both were on the phone... silence... continued silence. Neither he hung up, nor I did. After 20 minutes silence, i said, i have to go. He said, OK, and we hung up.


It's not the same anymore. I'm so broken inside. I really do not know what to talk to him. I cannot trust him again. It is just not possible anymore. Who knows, maybe right now he is chatting with some chick, but he is someone elses problem from that time on. I'm out.


I appreciate your comments. I know, I should not have picked up, but I did.

amethyst

what does it matter anyway? I saw there is nothing recoverable. He sounded very sad. He made weird noises. But it still doesn't matter. Whatever I had inside me for him, is dead.

perhaps another scorpio can identify with that. The love I felt for him was very deep. He pulled out every bit of it. He used it all up. There is nothing left. And that is what I discovered with this phone call.

Posted by GemsRaGalsBestPal
Dear FUM,

Oh lawrdy babes. You have gotten yourself into a pickle. I know it well and I can always see it from the outside but never the inside. From your original post I was already thinking "this can't be good" and well it wasn't, but as it was stated before... you knew way before you asked him to love you.

Unfortunately you fell into the trap of... if he says he loves me then he's not this jerk my subconscious knows him to be, nope, if he says that three word phrase he becomes the man I wrote the story about. You know that man, the one who you made all the excuses for? The one that had to be there to take place of all the uneasiness your subconscious was throwing at you. All the "I love you" was going to do was act as a band-aid to shut your subconscious up for a little longer. It was a control mechanism on your part.

If you had taken things for as they are, recognized that inner voice that was shouting for you to run and punched the one that was telling you there was a reason or an excuse... you wouldn't be here, recovering from a lost love and betrayal. When it comes to a partner male, female, canine, plastic inflatable, what have you... LISTEN TO YOUR TRUE SELF. You always know best for you, you just convince yourself you don't.

Thankfully we are all hardwired with that resource, unfortunately we also learn self deprecation and many other wonderful tools to convince ourselves that we're wrong and that if we just stick it out, give chances, whatever.... that it will all turn out like that fairy tale we have written up in our heads.

I'm so sorry you are here and hurting. I hope you listen to yourself from here on out and send that doucher to the planet of people who don't exist anymore. Speaking of fantasy stories in our heads I gotta run, I think that was a knock at the door and I'm sure it's the Pisces I'm seeing. I'm sure he's here with dozens of roses, his heart on his sleeve and a pretty blue box that I'm quite sure says Tiffany's on it. I wonder if his white horse is tired and thirsty from his long journey and if his armor needs polishing.

*HUGS*

Gems, lol I had forgotten how a good fantasy story looks like with roses and the Tiffany 😄

I so hope for your Pisces man showed up at your door as you just described. I can imagine because my brother is the same way. He also is Pisces... very romantic,

charming and loves to spoil his (today wife) 🙂 When he heard about this CapMan, he told me 2 years ago to flick him like a cigarette. But I didn't listen then.

And 2 years after, still nothing has changed. My fault. And it is said to be patient with Cap. I guess with those who are worth it.

Posted by amethyst2002

You can only blame him for so much, for so long.. if you continue to tolerate this treatment, you'll no longer be the victim. You'll be just as bad as he is for allowing it to happen over and over and over.

This is. It gets old really fast when someone allows this shit to happen for so long. Hopefully this phone call is what does it for her. From here on out, she's bringing the rest upon herself. She's known for a loong time that this guy is bad news, yet she keeps going back because of the stupid little inklings and voices telling her that there's more to it than he leads on. There isn't. It's been proved over and over.

Now all she needs to do is retreat and allow herself to heal so she can finally move on from his manipulation and mind games. Beaten wife syndrome is hard to get over and you can't really do it if you keep exposing yourself to the douchebag. Let him be, "miserable." He deserves it. Not her.

click to expand

Amethyst, I truly appreciate your concern. I have my very own Aries daughter in the house who tells me the same every day.

I drove out of the city for several days just to get away from all this. On my return I saw phone calls lined up by him. Also he had messaged me on facebook which I first disregarded, but then responded to leave me alone because he has put up some cynical remarks on his cousin's FB wall that involved me. I'm FB friends with cousin who is just another douche like him if not worse I figure. I used to think he is the smart guy cuz he is teaching at a university.

Anyway... all of them annoy me at the moment. The universe still has to prove to me that there is a Capman out there who is what a Scorpio girl thinks he is. CAP males have all the right ingredients to be wonderful for Scorpio (i'm talking just for my zodiac sign). I just hope a Cap male learns to put all those good ingredients together in the right order.

Sorry, I may sound bitter. There are all these wonderful male Caps on these boards... like M 🙂 and others. We just have to meet them.

Posted by QuietSt0rm

Posted by amethyst2002


This is. It gets old really fast when someone allows this shit to happen for so long. Hopefully this phone call is what does it for her. From here on out, she's bringing the rest upon herself.

I concur.

But like I said, it's not our decision to make so we can only advise, then live & let live/learn.

I agree with you 100% . Sometimes it takes others a little longer for it to sink in, that they deserve better. Some people are just a glutton for punishment. Some women like the drama, I don't know. Different strokes for different folks.

My sister has been with an abusive man for over a decade. She reached a point where she got away, my dad hired an attorney for her.. we thought she was on her road to freedom. Not quite.. she went right back to that shit. I'm convinced that's just what works for her. *shrug*

I dunno...

click to expand

QuietStorm 🙂

It is a conflicting feeling that I experience at the moment for seeing myself from a distance... which frustrates me. Then I see myself close-up (the person who let's this man abuse my trust). I go far and close in my mind. Right now I am looking from a distance at myself. Loyalty is what I strive for. I was married to a verbally abusive man for 15 years. One day, it was like a snap. In one day, I let him know I'm leaving and I did leave a few provinces away. Quite far away that I never had to see him again. We still don't talk although we have a daughter.

I hope for your sister that she brings her mind together and learns respecting herself. For her to get away from such relationship is far more difficult than it is for me and CapMan. I kept CapMan away from my home and close proximity, because he never passed my tests enough to be allowed closer. I loved him in my own way and hoped he will figure out and put his ducks in a row one day. But that is not going to happen. I lost respect for him. You will know what I mean by that. I feel disgusted by him at the moment. I'm really looking down on him. At the moment, I feel in a silent stage before a storm. Once that withering passes, I'm done.

The thrill is gone. The charm has dispersed.

It's just the course of how I deal with things. It's a very slow process for me once I have opened myself up so much. I wish I could say

... it took me only 2 weeks 😛 lol

cheers, everyone.

I'm happy to have your support on here.

He is a douchebag... regardless of his sign, of course.

It took me 2 years to realize this... excuses, excuses.. excuses...

When he called, my caller ID shows instead of his name *have respect for yourself, FUM*. I will change that to *Asshole*.

I don't want to delete his number so I don't pick up by accident.

Posted by QuietSt0rm

Posted by FUMRedFairy_tales

Should I face him or just ignore??

I don't know if ignoring is an adult solution. But I'm so sick of everything.

At the end of the day, you just have to ask yourself whether this is something you can put up with... If this is the type of shit you wanna deal with in the future, because he's not likely to change. And if you can see yourself being content being with someone that has proven he's not trustworthy, then go on & hear him out.

click to expand

I agree with you, but want to throw this in as well.

If you are dealing with a water sign male that is in his 30s, then there is the distinct chance that he has matured a lot better than a capricorn has.

Most here on this forum will agree that capricorn males tend to age backwards for some reason.

They start off serious and even grown up at a very early age, but end up acting like teenagers when they are in their late 20s and throughout their 30s, 40s and so forth.

It's going to be hard for someone to break free of such a controlling relationship, but with some self-confidence and "a little help from your friends," you should be okay.

Do not give way to a master manipulator and controller, as he will ruin you from the inside and out.

Scubafish

*It's going to be hard for someone to break free of such a controlling relationship, but with some self-confidence and "a little help from your friends," you should be okay.*

This is a first for me that something has dragged on for so long. It is true that "the help of friends" and I mean the ones on here.. on DXP, has helped me a lot. I think, I'd continue repeating my cycles with him. Every time he returns, he uses different techniques until he gets me, and then, it goes back to the old routine.


*Do not give way to a master manipulator and controller, as he will ruin you from the inside and out.*

I never would have known to what extend manipulation can be used as a powerful tool. I never allowed it before, but I have become my own worse enemy. I still don't believe Capman is doing this on purpose. He is wrapped up in a cycle himself and he pulls with that gravity every woman who allows to be caught up in his spin.

Posted by QuietSt0rm
I know, I've been seeing a cap for almost 3 years.. they are definitely not easy men to walk away from. But when a situation is bad for you, it's just plain bad for you. All that extra stuff about them aging backward or forward is irrelevant to me.

If any situation is doing more harm than good, it's a no-brainer to get out before you become even more involved.

I so agree with you on the *not easy men to walk away from*. It might be that we (Cap/Scorp) have a deep understanding for each other. When hit, it hits -- most possibly -- both of us.

And I so agree with *when bad for you, it's bad for you*. Don't fool yourself away.

I can't figure the reverse aging part. As far as I experience looking at myself, I was more mature when in my 20s and much earlier. I had stricter rules for myself, which I followed to the T. Now things have changed for me. I am living partially my teenage years. I have been in this rebellious mode for the past 4 years about. I hope I can snap out of this.

The master manipulative Cap is actually a Cap that isn't aware he's being manipulative. The most manipulating thing a Cap can do is be himself, in all honesty.

Inana,

I am not referring to all Caps, just to the one I was in a relationship with. I hope I didn't make an offensive comment. I know he is not aware of what he is doing sometimes. He has set himself goals and as he ages, he seems in some kind of panic to fulfill them. He showed remorse for his past behaviour. He did say the past months he decided to stay out of any kind of relationship, which I also saw on his computer. First I thought he cheated on me with the ex again, but I saw he didn't. My anger is for the past not after he said, I love you. He did ask if he can call me for business. After testing the waters of conversation topics, he has turned his calls into a business one, because I don't want to go into personal conversations anymore. When he asks me personal questions, I go quiet because I don't want to give him reasons to nest himself back into my life again. He calls me up for business. There was some unfinished business and I can't just keep ignoring him. After that deal he is working on, he may disappear, but I stopped thinking that way. I stopped waiting for him. He is someone elses problem. It feels good. He said, he had a miserable New Year's eve. I am glad he did feel miserable. I also hope he remembers how he felt.

anyway.. just ranting.

Posted by FUMRedFairy_tales
Inana,

I am not referring to all Caps, just to the one I was in a relationship with. I hope I didn't make an offensive comment. I know he is not aware of what he is doing sometimes. He has set himself goals and as he ages, he seems in some kind of panic to fulfill them. He showed remorse for his past behaviour. He did say the past months he decided to stay out of any kind of relationship, which I also saw on his computer. First I thought he cheated on me with the ex again, but I saw he didn't. My anger is for the past not after he said, I love you. He did ask if he can call me for business. After testing the waters of conversation topics, he has turned his calls into a business one, because I don't want to go into personal conversations anymore. When he asks me personal questions, I go quiet because I don't want to give him reasons to nest himself back into my life again. He calls me up for business. There was some unfinished business and I can't just keep ignoring him. After that deal he is working on, he may disappear, but I stopped thinking that way. I stopped waiting for him. He is someone elses problem. It feels good. He said, he had a miserable New Year's eve. I am glad he did feel miserable. I also hope he remembers how he felt.

anyway.. just ranting.

My comment was directed towards scuba, or whoever it was, that said Caps are master manipulators.

UPDATE:

It was a week from hell. I had hopes by the new moon for new beginnings. Yes it is a new beginning for me, but I did not expect it would require such hard battle.


Mr. CapGuy continued calling me, of course. I am happy he had a shitty Christmas and a shitty New Years and all that shittiness in between. I don't think he can pay off my past pains in a few days.

The ex girlfriend got envolved in our cause. Apparently, before he had announed his love to me, he had beaten her up a couple of days ago. Broke her tooth. She invaded his house and a fight broke. In his SICKO head he believed she is cheating on him with downstair neighbour. Long story short, he runs in between us.

It went thus far that he continuously called me and hung up on me the other day. He couldn't take out his anger and started throwing threats and insults at me. He said, he wants to kill me. Cut me into pieces. Tie stones around my feet and throw me into a lake. He went totally nuts. Then he started saying that he feels disgusted for ever touching me... I look like a monkey, and more insults. I hung up on him and issued him a written warning to discontinue contacting and verbally harassing me or else I will take legal action.

He immediately blocked me on Facebook. He had hacked into his ex Scorp's account THAT is how he got the virus in his computer. I had told him that. He downloaded some software to hack into her account. Her account is blocking me too now, but we started talking to each other on the phone. That is how everything came out.


Today his ex Scorp called and told me he is suing me for $ 8,000 that he claims he lend me. Which is absolute bull crap. I can't believe that this man I once so cared for and loved, turns into such abusive MONSTER.


Not only that, apparently he broke ex Scorp's finger in the past. And just in December when she invaded his house, he broke her tooth. We compared dates and it turned out whenever he was back with me, he treated her badly.

Now he is trying to make it work with her again. Asked her to marry her... She allowed him back into her life for 6 years. Mine is 2. WoW... what a lesson, but it doesn't seem to be over yet.

I'm posting this so women with similar stories are aware how ugly it can get if they believe EVERY RETURN of his man will change his behaviour to you. It only gets worse!!! Sociopaths have no remorse.

Really? WTH??

He sounds crazy, and his ex sounds crazier!! Is she trying to get revenge on him or something? Why is she invading his house??

You need to file a restraining order, and get your number changed. I wouldn't pick up the phone if he called ever again. Guys like this never change, ever.

The times when he wasn't with me, he made use of the EX. Not at the same time, but it was a back and forth. When he asked me if he can bring my parents for dinner and I declined, he went back with the EX. She says he just came and went to her house as he pleased. She cooked for him, she washed his laundry, she shopped for clothes for him. She says, he lives free off me. In November he was staying with her for a week or two. Midnight he received a phone call. She wanted to know who it was. He got angry and left to live back in his own place.


She then went to his house to see what he was up to. If he was with another woman. She says, I don't give him sex anymore. I wouldn't trust for I can catch a disease. When she appeared at his place, he started beating her up. She says he accused her of sleeping with downstair neighbour. Then downstair and upstair neighbours came in between and police was called.

He told me he wanted her out of his life. But sleeping with neighbour sounded quite wacko to me at the time.

Meanwhile, he was back with me.

He told her that I came to his door, cried outside and started taking my clothes off so he took me in. HAHAHAAAA (believe me, this is a freaking nervous laugh)

EX told him that she doesn't believe him anymore. She believes me.

The EX was very desperate when she contacted me. We both came behind his using us.

She said, they would be together and then, he would just disappear. --> the way he did to me!

He told her that I begged him for sex.

I told her, that I wanted to know where I stand with him. We didn't have sex. I asked CapMan I am not coming up to his place, he should meet me at his door.

You've posted more than enough for me, and everyone else to see, that you should be completely done with him. The both of you should leave him and all the drama behind you. No more wondering where you stand, what he's doing, who he is with...who cares at this point? Leave it alone.

If you have to keep in touch with the other girl so the two of you can be support to eachother to keep away, then do that. She doesn't need to fall back into the drama either. She sounds broken, and that will happen when you are abused. I've witnessed with Caps myself to never invade their space/privacy and to never follow them. He is a monster indeed, but running back will only give him more power and put the blame on you.

I am trying to get away from him, but he unblocked me on facebook and wrote me lettter full of lies he is telling the EX. He asks me to repeat from her mouth.

He is threatened me some more today. He says he has friends and will send them to my parents. He wrote that I don't even know what I'm capable of. The EX told me be aware he has filed a petition in court that I owe him 8,000 bucks which he also claims in that letter to me as if it is truth.

I blocked him.

I blocked the cousin.

I don't want any dealings with him which I also told the EX. She wants to confront him with me. She wanted to have us meet at some coffee shop. I declined of course. I said, I don't want any dealings with him anymore. I was loud and clear. I am not going to meet him anywhere. If you want me to talk to him on the phone, put your loudspeaker on, because you have to hear it too.

Am expecting a call.

If he continues contacting me, I will have to go to the police because this guy was a (so called) freedom fighter. He has been part of some terrorist group.

*sigh*

Never make it harder than it has to be. If/when you are really done you won't have to "try" to get away from him. Obviously, he hasn't pissed you off good enough yet.

No call as of yet.

Looks like CapMan has talked himself out to EX 🙂

If I'd be angry --- it takes me a loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong time to get angry -- then he would find his ass in jail.

I don't want to go there. I hope they (CapMan and EX) make it work for each other in the end and are happy for ever.

I will count my blessing. Already I feel happy I kept him away from my home. Not sure if that was Scorp intuition...


farewell to them

obviously Scorp EX likes to believe she has control of the relation. lol

oh... one more input

CapMan said to her, *let's go for dinner and talk, but you have to pay the bill*


lol

*sigh again*

This ain't over folks LoL.

*waits for the next update*

I'm just remembering what we talked earlier with EX, Inana.

Not forcing people to read my post.. just trying to show how funny sometimes someone elses story can sound.

Posted by FUMRedFairy_tales
I'm just remembering what we talked earlier with EX, Inana.

Not forcing people to read my post.. just trying to show how funny sometimes someone elses story can sound.

I know your not forcing anyone to read. I think her story sounds sad, and I just hope that you are not sucked back into the drama in anyway.

you are right, honey.

I feel sorry for her too. But with this I like to be able to show how self-delusional we can be by hoping things may change. It doesn't. At this point, I believe, she DOES believe once she caught him... he may change. We all know he won't.

Anniversary 2 is bad,

BUT

Anniversary 6 is pretty bad.


I want them to be each other's problem.. not mine anymore. She should leave him on her own terms... not mine. I want him off my collar.

She believes he came to her because I cornered him and left him.


She keeps hunting for clues that he does things to her, he doesn't do to me. Not sure if I make sense.... but she is looking for excuse to get him back.

I already pushed him away. I also warned her. I explained how *I* kept taking him back.


I wholeheartedly hope they can make it work if they both are meant for each other. She knows what he is doing to me, but if she wants him back no-matter-what... then I feel no guilt because I was honest and available for her.

She kept blaming me that she tried contacting me multiple times to put an ending to what she is going through. She wanted an honest answer from me that I did not provide to her, or else... she had other options but kept waiting for this guy who continued manipulating her and me. Now she has me on her side...

The rest is up to her.

She said to him and me if he is going to bring me to court, she will be witness on MY side, because she believes me.

sigh

hope it never gets there.

LOL chaos 😄

OK... let me spell this out.


This all reminds me of the movie *My Best Friend's Wedding*.

Look at the end result.

He threatens ME.

He is back with EX.


🙂

caribbean

i was trying to run but got caught by some tornado


it is silent now. am hoping it is over... i may receive a supina by this freak... if so.. i am planning on sticking that document right into his where the sun doesn't shine. I will see him in court. He is a crave digger.

Oh mah lawd!

I think I saw this dude.... wasn't he the guest star on the Maury show?