Bringing out the dominance in a Gemini man?

Hi guys! Well, my long-term boyfriend is a Gemini, and I am an Aquarius. Things in our relationship are pretty much based on equality and we share responsibilities. But I would like to inspire him to be more dominant sometimes, I like that in a man. Any ideas on what I should do?

His ascendant is in Pisces, so he acts extra feminine sometimes. His moon is in Sagittarius, his Venus is in Gemini and his Mars is in Virgo.

What makes you Gemini people feel strong? (Or people with similar placements)

Thanks in advance!

How can I post it? I know his birth date.

Wrap his hands around your throat when he’s fucking you. He’ll get the message and take it from there

Yes, he was born in Thessaloniki, Greece on 23/5/1997.

He knows I am submissive but is a bit indifferent about such stuff. However, he gets turned on about sex and other activities impulsively most of the time, like if I am direct in my approach, I won't be able to turn him on. It has to be veeery subtle.

He generally gives off signals of dominance naturally but doesn't express it much in bed... He doesn't express submissiveness either.

Posted by rejuvenatedheart

Posted by helenaqua

Yes, he was born in Thessaloniki, Greece on 23/5/1997.

He knows I am submissive but is a bit indifferent about such stuff. However, he gets turned on about sex and other activities impulsively most of the time, like if I am direct in my approach, I won't be able to turn him on. It has to be veeery subtle.

He generally gives off signals of dominance naturally but doesn't express it much in bed... He doesn't express submissiveness either.

Is he younger than you? What's the age difference?

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He is 3 months younger than me.

How long have you been together?

And in what ways do you want him to be more dominant??

Posted by LadyNeptune

How long have you been together?

And in what ways do you want him to be more dominant??

About three years, I mean sexually dominant.

Posted by nanobot

Holy hell, that's a lot of mutable energy. I think that gem sun/sag moon peeps are super chill and docile. You need to find a way to activate his virgo mars because virgo energy, I have found to be very "out there" and open sexually.

I think that if you can't be bold or direct - then that might be problematic. But I agree with LadyNeptune.. you need to give him the opportunity to take control in a situation and let him have the lead. You can start by doing what she said, or asking him to spank you, suggest doing some lite bondage, or anything else that will force him to step into the role and work your way up from there. Oh and gemini men respond well to dirty talk.. maybe this will get him in a more "animalistic" thus dominant mood. Baby steps. Hopefully he will start to enjoy these things and it will progress.

I actually had the same situation going with my aquarius ex, but I would say that he definitely let his dominant side out over time.

We have engaged in some d/s stuff, he has stepped into the role, and twice he got into domspace, which scared him in the beginning and then intrigued him. Thing is, he doesn't seem to take on the role as a natural, usual part of his sexuality, instead it is only when I ask him of it or when he remembers to do it for me... He always felt very guilty and awkward when he did stuff that he thought hurt me.

Nevertheless, he is getting used to the role. It's like a tiny flame that is veryyy slowly growing. So I was wondering what I could do to bring him closer to feeling dominant in general, like should I try to boost his ego? Make him angry, jealous or threatened, to cause a reaction? Maybe just wait it out? What do you think he would respond better to?

Posted by starlord

Posted by LadyNeptune

Wrap his hands around your throat when he’s fucking you. He’ll get the message and take it from there

Careful with that though. First couple of times with a gem he was good and dominant to a good degree. But at the ens of the weel he was hurting me, going too hard and slapping too hard and hands around the neck too hard. He got lost in it. Glad to have said bye bye to that.

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That's true about me too!! Sometimes he goes overboard, but I don't mind...

How did you initiate d/s play? Did he initiate?

Posted by VenusRetrogade

Posted by helenaqua

Yes, he was born in Thessaloniki, Greece on 23/5/1997.

He knows I am submissive but is a bit indifferent about such stuff. However, he gets turned on about sex and other activities impulsively most of the time, like if I am direct in my approach, I won't be able to turn him on. It has to be veeery subtle.

He generally gives off signals of dominance naturally but doesn't express it much in bed... He doesn't express submissiveness either.

damn. same birthday as me just im older. haha and i am engaged to an aqua. LOL.

my man and i argued once because he wanted me to take the lead and i didnt. it was a petty thing like deciding on what to eat. the thing is, i can take the lead but i prefer not to especially with an aqua. because for one aquas can be stubborn. i wouldnt wanna fight with my man so i let him. decide and go with it. but when push comes to shove and i decide on something or take a lead on something, rest assured i will follow through til its completed. i gave him a taste of it and he was miserable for days. aquas say they want us to lead but deep down you know u dont want to. and deep down, i know it. gems have very little ego to feed and very little need for us to validate ourselves. aquas do have the need to lead so we let you. not because of weakness but because we love you.

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I feel what you said... It's a reality. Maybe I should leave him more space to be dominant.

But how does being dominant as a role play sound to you? Not a real fight, no one is getting miserable...

Hmm... as Gemini my self and after meeting other geminis I’d say we’re rather dominant...with submissive traits. I think we like a challenge, so maybe actually trying to dominate him might bring out his more dominant nature. For me I’m rather submissive but when I want to play...I want to play and can get more dominant. If the partner is right they’ll pick up on this and just take control in other ways...it’s weird, to me being dominant is different than being gentle aggressive (sexually). Me giving foreplay and being in control feels dominant when in reality I probably come across as rather submissive. Doing all the things the man wants.

If you want aggressive submissive (pushing, pining spanking etc) maybe be bad, like really bad. Talk so dirty you’ll feel ashamed after. Put your self in a very submissive behaviour, but guide him. Tell him how you want things done and hopefully slowly he’ll get caught up in it and soon it will become natural.

An example maybe is to tell him to tie you up, and then express how good it’s making you feel. Tell him things he can and can’t do, when us gems are given to much room we don’t actually know what to do. We do like rules despite what other people say.

Hope some of this helps, I’m a young gem (early twenties) so I’m still learning my self.

Ugh the gemini I know is so reluctant ... guess that's just a Gemini trait that you got to deal with. 3 years you are so patient to be honest ... what's your moon?

Thank you all so much for the tips!

It is going much better, I think his Mars in Virgo is awkward until he feels he is approaching perfection... Now he knows what he is doing is exactly what I want him to do and he's really enjoying it!

@TxOgal My moon is in Taurus!

I love this: gems have very little ego to feed and very little need for us to validate ourselves.

We do right?

And we don’t...👍

Posted by LadyNeptune

Wrap his hands around your throat when he’s fucking you. He’ll get the message and take it from there

Lol whenever I try this my man just laughs.

I never understand how telling him what to do is going to bring dominance.

Just tell him that you are his sex doll and he can do whatever he wants to you and that you are there to please him. He needs to feel in charge.