pikeperch
@pikeperch
11 YearsPisces
Comments: 0 · Posts: 76 · Topics: 3
Is it more than friends?!!?
Pikeperch and Aquavita
Thanks for your advice. These conflicting thoughts go round in my mind however I think I should try to move on as she did play dumb. Although I do think this was partly to get me back as I didn't turn up that night..she's pretty sensitive.
I'm looking for a new job closer to home so this will help me to move on. I doubt I'll give up hope completely though.
The whole fighting thing makes me wonder why she puts so much energy into it.
Thanks for your advice. These conflicting thoughts go round in my mind however I think I should try to move on as she did play dumb. Although I do think this was partly to get me back as I didn't turn up that night..she's pretty sensitive.
I'm looking for a new job closer to home so this will help me to move on. I doubt I'll give up hope completely though.
The whole fighting thing makes me wonder why she puts so much energy into it.
She does love her boyfriend, she's just not in love with him. She told you that she loves him because he is probably a good guy or has a lot of good qualities and ACCEPTS her. But she likes you more in her heart. Your clue was what came after that statement about the bf and of course all the other stuff. She must be young. You aren't showing her that she can take a chance with you because it would mean hurting someone else. Classic behaviour... of some gems anyway. Curious, what sign are you?
Gemeliorist She's in her 30's. I'm a Capricorn...I know, I know not the wisest choice for me but first person I've really clicked with. What would you advise I do, show her its worth the risk?
She does go shy quite a lot when she's with me. I'm going to have a few chances of having a talk. If I do that it just seems that I'll be telling her twice how I feel.
She's not playing, IMO. She's behaving like a Gem who really wants you. For me, the biggest clue (among the tons of other clues) was the gifts she gives you. When I'm way into someone, I'm compelled to give him gifts.
Whether you want to involve yourself in a cheating situation is your call, but from your description of events it appears that you have the go-ahead from her.
Whether you want to involve yourself in a cheating situation is your call, but from your description of events it appears that you have the go-ahead from her.
I was a bit more forward/ flirty/ suggestive with her today but not in a sleazy way. Instead of objecting she would go quiet but didn't see a signal to go ahead. Do Geminis prefer action rather than words?
I wouldn't be forward anymore just yet. You made your feelings known, now just step back and chill a bit while she processes the new info. Be ready to respond when she shows interest again. Gem girls can like a chase, but then get confused about what we really want once we catch what we were after.
She's know for a few months now and we stopped going out during this time. But recently she showed interest again and we are now again spending time together.
Posted by Tron
Ok, well this is a somewhat complicated story but its been driving me crazy for over a year now and need some advice...please!
I met a gemini woman at work through meetings and other work related stuff and we hit it off straight away in a big way. Our work related emails quickly turned into personal chats and this turned into dozens of emails every day as we were trying to find out as much as we could about each other.
Flirting - then the flirting started, whether it be over email or exchanging secret glances across the office. Another reason to come to work! It got to a point where we couldn't go a day without chatting and this soon progressed to chatting on Facebook after work and at weekends. These chats lasted for hours.
We soon started going for lunch and also drinks after work with just the two of us. We just enjoyed being together. She always dressed up when we spent time together. HOWEVER, she has a boyfriend who she lives with.
This has played on my mind and I have never made a move but I think she has wanted me to. She has left small gifts on my desk, gave me a pet name, we have touched hands and had full body hugs which last for ages. I have asked if her boyfriend knows if we chat on Facebook and she says he just leaves her to it and goes to bed. I'm not sure how true this is.
There was a work leaving party which we were both invited to. She asked if I was going, as the other people going aren't that nice to her. She told me her boyfriend was going away and if I was coming out to play. I said I might do but not too sure. I didn't go and didn't let her know.
She didn't speak to me for 2 weeks after and when we did eventually go out for coffee she made a point of telling me how much she loves her boyfriend and that she has never been stood up before. I'm not sure what I was supposed to do here?! Was she hoping something would happen?? I was confused due to the boyfriend situation. She also tried to make me jealous by flirting with a work mate and then looking at me. We got back on track at xmas where we had one of those long hugs.
A few months later she invited me to go and feed her friends cats with her at lunch as her friend was away. She came to work more dressed up than usual, wearing lipstick and perfume which she doesn't do too much at work. Anyway in the house she went really shy, she has never been this shy! Was she expect
^ I don't like home wreckers, what turns me off even more.. you know she has a boyfriend aaannD she lives with him? Let it be.
I have never become close with someone who has a boyfriend before, its just not my style . She has also become close. She was the one pursuing me first of all and leaving gifts and doing the other stuff so its not me attempting to steal someone's girlfriend or I would have made a move a year ago.
But the the interest is still there. Definitely something keeping us close despite all whats gone on.
But the the interest is still there. Definitely something keeping us close despite all whats gone on.
A
I agree with what everyone is saying. Sounds like shes loves her bf but is not 'In Love' with him. She definitely likes you because Gems don't waste their time with guys they are not interested in romantically if the guy has told them that he likes them as more than a friend, we would stay clear of you if we didn't like you like that, we don't keep people around incase we want to use them later that is not our style . She is testing your loyalty. And to be honest if she ever left her bf for you it would probably be a big mistake. Somewhere down the line as a Capricorn you would end up devaluing her for it. And the arguments between you would escalate as you would both want to lead.
Thanks for your comment. To be honest I gave learnt to accept her as she is. Her different sides and flirting is something I'm attracted to when its not in game play. She's opened up to me revealing her Insecure and sensitive sides which is the complete opposite to what she shows to everyone else. Definitely a strong bond keeping us together thats for sure which is kind of new to me.
Taken for a ride, possibly but it honestly doesn't seem like it. Thrilled about it, not at all dude.
But thanks for your comment.
But thanks for your comment.
Posted by tizianiPosted by Tron
Thanks for your comment. To be honest I gave learnt to accept her as she is. Her different sides and flirting is something I'm attracted to when its not in game play. She's opened up to me revealing her Insecure and sensitive sides which is the complete opposite to what she shows to everyone else. Definitely a strong bond keeping us together thats for sure which is kind of new to me.
You are being taken for a ride and it seems you're thrilled to death about it.click to expand
Really? ....I think you are embracing the stereotype. Sigh.
@Tron
I wanted to post several times and there was always some issue, technical or personal. Anyway... hope you are being patient and communicative when she reaches out. It's easy to play tag and reject the other out of hurt or uncertainty when they do come to you. This only continues the cycle until it either escalates into verbal sparring or someone or both gives up.
For a gem genuine acceptance is key. This makes a gem feel safe and secure maybe over more conventional or popular values like money, career etc.... but they are very adaptable so you can expect a lot of compromising as a relationship evolves.
I don't think it's a good thing to be the third person in someone's relationship. You need to let her know that you are her friend and if she wants something more than she has to come to you on her own. As a single person. This should apply to any sign.
But with a gem you have to be firm and if she seems to waffle, remain steady and don't waver. Grounding is important. We are so adaptable that we can and often lose ourselves in our thoughts and the object of our affection or significant other.
We carry opposing thoughts simultaneously. That's part of the duality and can't be change, only managed.
I wanted to post several times and there was always some issue, technical or personal. Anyway... hope you are being patient and communicative when she reaches out. It's easy to play tag and reject the other out of hurt or uncertainty when they do come to you. This only continues the cycle until it either escalates into verbal sparring or someone or both gives up.
For a gem genuine acceptance is key. This makes a gem feel safe and secure maybe over more conventional or popular values like money, career etc.... but they are very adaptable so you can expect a lot of compromising as a relationship evolves.
I don't think it's a good thing to be the third person in someone's relationship. You need to let her know that you are her friend and if she wants something more than she has to come to you on her own. As a single person. This should apply to any sign.
But with a gem you have to be firm and if she seems to waffle, remain steady and don't waver. Grounding is important. We are so adaptable that we can and often lose ourselves in our thoughts and the object of our affection or significant other.
We carry opposing thoughts simultaneously. That's part of the duality and can't be change, only managed.
Thanks for all the advice.
We have been out for lunch once or twice recently and full on with messages but now back to being distant. I'll just listen to your advice and be patient.
We have been out for lunch once or twice recently and full on with messages but now back to being distant. I'll just listen to your advice and be patient.
Just when I thought things were getting back on track with her it was all completely turned on its head this week.
I thought she was more distant this week and a little standoffish compared to a full on week last week. Very long between replies such as a whole day, etc and saying she was too busy to go for lunch. Today she had dressed up. I found out she sneeked out for lunch with a junior, shes mangement.
so i know i dont own this person or im not her bf but i feel like ive been played and she's getting attention from someone else and she seems to be sneeking about and the same way she initially did with me.
advice appreciated as im in turmoil
I thought she was more distant this week and a little standoffish compared to a full on week last week. Very long between replies such as a whole day, etc and saying she was too busy to go for lunch. Today she had dressed up. I found out she sneeked out for lunch with a junior, shes mangement.
so i know i dont own this person or im not her bf but i feel like ive been played and she's getting attention from someone else and she seems to be sneeking about and the same way she initially did with me.
advice appreciated as im in turmoil
😢
Just when I thought things were getting back on track with her it was all completely turned on its head this week.
I thought she was more distant this week and a little standoffish compared to a full on week last week. Very long between replies such as a whole day, etc and saying she was too busy to go for lunch. Today she had dressed up. I found out she sneeked out for lunch with a junior, shes mangement.
so i know i dont own this person or im not her bf but i feel like ive been played and she's getting attention from someone else and she seems to be sneeking about and the same way she initially did with me.
advice appreciated as im in turmoil
I thought she was more distant this week and a little standoffish compared to a full on week last week. Very long between replies such as a whole day, etc and saying she was too busy to go for lunch. Today she had dressed up. I found out she sneeked out for lunch with a junior, shes mangement.
so i know i dont own this person or im not her bf but i feel like ive been played and she's getting attention from someone else and she seems to be sneeking about and the same way she initially did with me.
advice appreciated as im in turmoil
Posted by pikeperch
I'd suggest you move on. I doubt she has any romantic feelings towards you, if she had wouldn't she said something about it when you confessed your feelings for her instead of playing dumb?
From what I know about Geminis (a Gemini friend who is a girl) they're very social creatures, if you catch their they eye they will want to know everything about you, they will find you so interesting and you will have these long chats with them and just lots of fun spending time together, going places, doing things. If you're lucky they will continue to find you interesting, if you're not they might kind of forget about you after some time (or maybe it's just me).
Even if she is flirting with you and you're reading into everything right it still doesn't look like she will just drop her boyfriend for you. She probably enjoys your company and attention but I doubt she has any genuine romantic feelings for you.
Of course all my experience with a Gemini is second hand, so it's possible Geminis will correct me if I said something wrong.
As a gemini i'd have to say that is totally correct.
Posted by Tron
Taken for a ride, possibly but it honestly doesn't seem like it. Thrilled about it, not at all dude.
But thanks for your comment.
What's your sign?
Capricorn. Apart from the games, we get on really well, apart from the odd argument.
She wanted me to notice she was going out with someone else. Do you think this was an attempt to make me jealous or perhaps testing me?
She wanted me to notice she was going out with someone else. Do you think this was an attempt to make me jealous or perhaps testing me?
Posted by Tron
Capricorn. Apart from the games, we get on really well, apart from the odd argument.
She wanted me to notice she was going out with someone else. Do you think this was an attempt to make me jealous or perhaps testing me?
Maybe both. It can be a way of testing if you do get jealous or not. probably checking if you're still interested. However, i am certainly not her s this would still be my own interpretation. But if she's already in a relationship then i guess it best to stay away.
I was thinking of talking to her straight and saying if we're just friends then no more games. Do you think this approach may work?
Ok, thanks.
I think she met her bf online.
I think it has a lot to do with me not turning up on a night out when her bf was away. She took that as a rejection. Took a while to get back on speaking terms.
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