Lust or love

Lust or love how do you know the difference?

If friends for a while and then the chemistry changes is it love? If the trust issue etc has been dealt with and you are great friends can lust really come about or is it more?

Not talking about any special relationship here but looking back generally at relationships I have been in.

Well this is only an opinion, but I will tell you some signs that you are in love.
1. you feel butterflies or very excited every time you see them.

2. you want to be with them all the time

3. you love them unconditionally. For instance, you hate that he snores, or the way he eats, or his choice in cologne, he ticks you off a lot, but yet you still stay and you accept all the good things along with the bad.

4. you include him or her in every decision. For instance, you have an offer for a new job out of the state. You are excited about the job offer, but you also consider asking him to move with you. Or also, you may start working you schedule around that person so you can see them.

Okay, LUST!

1. you always want sex with the person

2. you like looking at them

3. you are happy to be with him because he is so good looking

4.there is nothing else in the relationship of substance.

5. you are not willing to sacrifice for the person.

Hope this helps!


twinkee77

145,
If your foundation is already built on a great friendship and the trust issues have been dealt with, then yes i would say that it is more than lust at that point. No not really. Are you looking to the other out of loneliness or desperation knowing that the other person is easily accessible? Another question, have you always looked at one another as prospects, or one day you both looked up and thought you might be falling in love after being friends for a while?

We need more to go on. What's the other persons sign— That might help.

I generally tend to think I'm in love every time, then it only really becomes clear in hindsight. Actually even in hindsight it's not really clear - I've either never been in love, or in love with hundreds of people. It really doesn't take much for me to fall in love/lust with a person - sometimes it's just someone who's pulled up in the car next to me at the lights - then all of a sudden I'm overlooking those glaring physical deformities and planning the rest of my life with them - actually it generally works the other way around for me than what is stated in twinkee's black and white checklist. Within the first few minutes of meeting someone i'm allready viewing them as my life partner, and yet when i'm in a relationship with someone i no longer want to look at them/have sex with them and generally as a pattern, move to another city without telling them. (and you all thought you had issues! 🤢gt; )

Oh, yeah, anyway back to the question - is there really any point in trying to figure out whether it's lust or love? Does the terminology change the way you feel, or are you just looking for validation/confirmation of the way you're supposed to feel?

Cortica, I totally agree with you! Like when I first start dating someone, I feel like I love them like right away, but I use that checklist to figure it out. I think we gems like to chase also because once i was dumped I felt like I was so in love with my ex. After a while, I figured out that I was not in love with him at all. It was just the fact that I couldn't have him! Now when I see him, it's like i never knew him. So strange!

"Oh, yeah, anyway back to the question - is there really any point in trying to figure out whether it's lust or love? Does the terminology change the way you feel, or are you just looking for validation/confirmation of the way you're supposed to feel?"


I am looking for ownership! I want the guy I'm with to keep me totally like his possession; keep me chained to the house! I want someone who is dominating and controlling, for real! This is what I want, and to each their own! Whatever works for ya'll is your business!

Cortica,

I think you have trust issues and have been hurt. Maybe you were too trusting and loving and kind and got screwed over? This is just my opinion! You are afraid of comittment? I bet deep down inside you long for it. Can you go through life alone, forever?? You are young now, but there will come a time you will think about the winter time.

205,
Have you ever thought about hooking up with a Scorpio, Aquarius, or Taurus—
I'm sure one of them will surely give you what you're looking for.

i dont know about everyone else, but i like the guy chasing after me. o_O And i'd like it if the guy did the same even after hes "caught" me MWAHAHA. *shrugs*...LuZOkay that was off the topic so lust or love? Hmm... i think sex and love both should go together. Is there really true love out there? Let's say that you're mom left you and you only had ur dad at home now. Would you still love her for leaving you? Would you feel any kind of betrayal? Durno, I dont know how anyone would still have the same feeling after a bad experience, so what is true love? Is there really true love? OKAY, YES THERE IS. I just thought of my last relationship -_- erm..bad experience. *cough* Aaaaaanyway, theres horny GIVE IT TO ME sex and love sex. lol. i dont know if that makes any sense, but i hope it does. There is a difference to love and lust, love is more like when you just feel that you can spend ur life with this person without any hestitations, well maybe cus some ppl just are afraid to commit and go into that next "level" but yeah, and also like the little things, for instance just being comfortable with that person and wanting to just spend time with that person and having those silent comfortable moments without thinking "er...k" Yep. While lust is more when you just want things for sexual purposes or other particular reasons that erm i wouldnt know. Anyway, i

LOL - what is this topic doing on the gemini board anyway!?

we're apparently the sign who's f u c ked when it comes to relationships - i have enough trouble trying to figure out what's going on with the other side of my personality, let alone a whole other person!!!

203.134,
You haven't lied yet. We're a mystery unto ourselves.

I was nosying around on here..I'm a libra. Thought I'd add my 6 cents.

Libras seem to fall in love constantly. If someone has similar interests as me and can feel the way I do then I manage to fall in love with immediately and seem to think we are going to be together forever.It's happened 4 times this year. LOL! Granted, each time it's only lasted a month and then they are suddenly not interested in a relationship. ugh.

I just met a gemini who was pursuing me recently, we went out, had a great time, talk a lot on the phone, went out again..then he tells me he really likes hanging out with me and wants to continue but doesn't want to date...that he isn't ready for a relationship. Huh? Then why bother is what I want to ask.He is working 24/7 in the company he is a huge part of...cited that as the reason. That he has no time.

any insight? And sorry this is in the middle of this thread.

pwahahahaha, not all gemini's are playaazzz 😉LuZ

64,
We're focused man! Business before pleasure. Once we set our sights on something then that's our primary focus.We're not letting anyone or anything stop us or get in our way of accomplishing our goal.

Please Believe It!!!!!!

what? what are you talking about? and do you know anything about a white car?

you're all full of crap! Don't listen to them! My experience with Gems is to run! They are not worthy! The one I knew anyway! focused my ass! Focused on the next piece they could get!!! And they are lousy providers! Don't know the meaning of work!

k..LOL ur funny, ur seriousness amuses me 😄LuZ

and goals! hah! who is gonna pass the next bowl?? lol

No, I am kidding, really! My knowledge first hand on the subject is they are wonderful people! I just like causing trouble now and again!

205,
Stop hating! You can't help but love us or should I say love to hate us.
Com'on now, have you ever had the pleasure of witnessing the GEM-IN-I.
Yeah, I know we're heyy but so what.

IM FOCUSED MAN!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, I feel that geminis are very restless period! I am a gemini. I have sometimes felt like I was in love with someone if I was pursuing them, but as soon as we got together and became comfortable, I was no longer interested as before. I relationships, we are very loving and caring, we just need mental stimulation and have to do something different all the time. Keep us entertained, basically! I am not a playa at all, just undecided about some things.

I Agree with both Cortica and Twinkee,

Gems are very fickle when it comes to relationships and love. It's like we're looking for the perfect combination when it comes to love. Not too much of that, a little bit more of that... and yes, we must be menatally stimulated. We NEED a mate that's an eclectic...nothing more+ nothing less-