Body Parts (Page 23)

This topic was created in the Miscellaneous forum by tubbyscubby on Friday, March 26, 2010 and has 1588 replies.

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@tubbyscubby
16 Years5,000+ Posts

RIGHTEOUS! @ chance. it's all about being one man. totally one with e-cypher. it's like we have an e-blunt dude and it's just going around the circle. purple haze man...purple haze!

and TOC we practically live together anyway. i think it will be awkward listening to him have sex but overall, i doubt he would flaunt his chickies in front of my face EXCEPT if it were to make me jealous.

i just need to find a renter and all that crap but i could save TONS this way and it'd be nice to go abroad and not have to worry so much about money or a job IF i find it difficult to get either. just can focus on improving my french and enjoying myself.

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@tubbyscubby
16 Years5,000+ Posts

aussies and their wackness.

i just heated up my backed potato and i'm trying to get the correct salt to sour cream ration going.

afterwards i shall watch some french tv and hopefully doze off after drinking the other half of my beer

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@tubbyscubby
16 Years5,000+ Posts

sorry venus but at least you can get rid of them.

back in high school i received a package in the mail. put the box on my bed and opened it. within DAYS i was being bit. by what pray tell?

^bed bugs!!! on the upside, i got a new bedroom set 😄

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@tubbyscubby
16 Years5,000+ Posts

lol...you're all in trouble! seriously, who are the other lice? can there be a clique of one?

j'ai peur!

she who shall not be named is going to exact her revenge.

prepare to be e-vanquished!

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@tubbyscubby
16 Years5,000+ Posts

i'm adding the rhinestones now! you will be BeDazzled!

but lice and mad cow disease are more along the lines of TOC and venus. i would sew in GPS tracking devices and hopefully some sort of mind control mechanism as it's my goal to rule the world of DXP and turn you all into my e-minions.

SIDE NOTE! ok, i'm watching maury and this chick has lost her damn mind. she keeps yelling/screaming/pleading "i swear to God" after having been told that not only did she fail the lie detector but the dude is NOT the father.

i mean even AFTER being proven a cheater and that the child isn't his, she's holding on to him screaming "i swear to God!!!!"

i'm sure there's some psychology involved in this but women make me sick sometimes.

Profile picture of tubbyscubby
@tubbyscubby
16 Years5,000+ Posts

i don't think i'm capable of working with others. i've tried but after about 6 months, i can't take it anymore. something about being around the same people all the time makes me feel like a prisoner and the reflexive biting begins. ESPECIALLY if the people are underhanded, lazy or mistake my kindness for blindness.

i once had a job in customer service during a summer when i was home from college. this older chick trained me and for a while there, we were cool. but one day i came to absolutely HATE her. was like a switch.

i think it was the fact that she was lazy and phony to our coworkers and customers and yet, they thought i was the bitch because i'd look at them like, "fuq the small talk. put your shit on the counter so i can ring you up and you can get the fuq outta my face. thanks!"

whereas she would smile in their face and then mumble shit under her breath or spend half her time eating/talking while i was taking most of the customers and had to beg her for a break. at the end of the day, i was there to work so i put up with it but after a while i got a lil pissed because i think that bitch thought i was her lil slave.

we ended up having a shouting match at one point and the things i said...i'm so evil.

that was the first time i realized that i don't work well with others and by the number of people i've left here with warm and fuzzy feelings, i know that comes as a surprise.

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@tubbyscubby
16 Years5,000+ Posts

how'd you know it was freakishly round?

back in college the football players voted me amongst the biggest booties on campus 😄 too bad i wasn't giving it up back then.

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@tubbyscubby
16 Years5,000+ Posts

nope, not seen superbad. that chick looks NOTHING like me. all that horse hair would make me itchy.

and yeah, i never got it. who do you want? the bitch that's quick, treats your stuff with respect and gets you in and out of the store as quick as possible or the heffer that comments on every garment you put on the counter and asks you how your day is going?

i don't have time for small talk. i don't even like small talk with my friends. if you're babbling on about complete bullshit you are more likely to get a blank stare from me than anything else.

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@tubbyscubby
16 Years5,000+ Posts

AA - AMERICAN football 😛 and back then you were like 12...literally.

and yea TOC, i can't really help it. i'm not a phony person. if you were to tell a joke and i didn't find it funny, where a normal person might laugh or smile. i'd say something like..."yea" and then silence. it's not deliberate either. i just can't fake it well so i don't. life's too short to be plastic.

*coughs*

i'm only a jackass if i'm working. if i get in your line and you're slow then i can normally wait patiently. very rarely am i rude to people doing stuff for me. you'd have to be a complete idiot/jackass/rude yourself and then i'd just storm off and say something like "fuq this shit" on my way out.

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@tubbyscubby
16 Years5,000+ Posts

well AA, that would be the arien way to handle things now wouldn't it?

my way is to not respond and make the person feel awkward in the midst of the silence. now SOMETIMES i will just over talk their laughter...keep the conversation going in another direction.

caps/virgos girls are amongst the most unfunny folk. i mean they have senses of humor but if i'm laughing around them, 9 times out of 10 i told a joke/said something funny.

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@tubbyscubby
16 Years5,000+ Posts

awkward silences used to bother me. i mean, i'd get nervous and everything or i'd be thinking in my head, OMG, SOMEONE SAY SOMETHING!

but as i've gotten older, it's whatever. i could literally be in your presence and not utter a word for hours if need be. for me, that's a reflection on you, not me because i obviously am rather gabby. if i'm quiet, you're either uninteresting or stupid. so fault yourself not me because i'm AWESOME!

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@tubbyscubby
16 Years5,000+ Posts

aren't the two of you opposites?

maybe you should learn from libra AA and TOC from you. obviously she needs to learn how to stop being such a bitch and hiding behind "i don't like conflict" and you as an aries need to learn that the first thing that comes to your mind is sometimes better left unsaid.

*playing psychoanalyst*

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@tubbyscubby
16 Years5,000+ Posts

you're having naughty thoughts about a "spit roast—"

and AA, are you saying that you have had people who have good conversations with you but then tell someone else that you're a bore? hmm, that would suck. but are you a bore? totally unfunny in person? pick your nose whilst talking?

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@tubbyscubby
16 Years5,000+ Posts

well, i have a lot of planets in aries and the end result is, i say exactly what is on my mind sometimes and afterward i think, "wow, was that appropriate?" and the answer is, i don't know and i don't care.

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@tubbyscubby
16 Years5,000+ Posts

what the F? TOC, i have heard of a lot of things but that one...WHAT? the kids these days and their wacky terms.

one of my fantasies is to be with two guys but i don't think i could ever do it.

1. what if they started getting into each other? that would sorta be hot but only if i was drunk and got to leave before everyone woke up and was in Las Vegas

2. what if the both suck in bed?

3. what if they both have lil wee? JESUS MARY AND JOSEPH i would know what to do with myself then.

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@tubbyscubby
16 Years5,000+ Posts

what is it with you and all these fainting spells? what drugs are you on!?!?!

and i agree, your moms primary concern should've been your health because truth is, in that case, her friends, if they are friends, should've been worried about you. "is he ok?" is the first thing that comes to mind not "what is wrong with him?"

BUT AA "what is wrong with him?" does eventually come to mind. it just seems your mom has it out of order. appearances second is the way you see things but not libra because they're vain and self-absorbed. right TOC?

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@tubbyscubby
16 Years5,000+ Posts

i have a friend who is a swinger and the gross shit he does is just beyond me. he said that each swingers club has its own rules. the ones he joins require that the men NEVER have engaged in homosexual activity and if it's discovered that they have, they are removed from the club.

and then when they're going around the room sexing each other, the women will tell them certain things. like "don't cum on face."

when he said that all i could think is, "WHAT?!?" seriously, i have never had the need to tell a guy that. gross 😛

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@tubbyscubby
16 Years5,000+ Posts

ok, not that my laughing fit is over.

AA, why were you bullied? that's a shame. i wasn't a bully but no one ever dared bully me. i think i had a "i'll whoop your ass" vibe about me.

i did fight a boy once on the way home. i'm not sure what came over me but he pissed me off and that was all she...i wrote.

and i got into a fight with one of my good friends once. she kept mouthing off. it was irritating me. so in the immortal words of the late eazy-e, "i grabbed the stupid bitch by her nappy ass weave."

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@tubbyscubby
16 Years5,000+ Posts

that line was funny and you meant it to be funny so don't even try it.

fire signs are like that. they tell you something tragic but do it in a way that you can't help but laugh.

weirdos...

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@tubbyscubby
16 Years5,000+ Posts

jackass i just told you that i wasn't 😛

OH! a now NBA star tried to steal some money from me on the way home. it was my fault for counting it out in the open but he gave it back...bitch. beyond that, i never had any run-ins. but girls are different from boys.

i think the only time a girl risks getting bullied as she gets older is if it involves a boy.

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@tubbyscubby
16 Years5,000+ Posts

beer flavored what?

how'd you know i was going to drink a beer? i bought a 6 pack yesterday. i'm on beer #2 for tonight.

see TOC, i can handle more than one...when i'm not already tired.

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@tubbyscubby
16 Years5,000+ Posts

i'm trying to decide what movie to watch. all this talk of high school and popular girls makes me want to watch Teen Witch but i'm eating fish and french fries and that makes me think of Formula 51.

decisions, decisions...