Minorities have you experienced this......

So a funny thing keeps happening to me.....

whenever I find myself in an environment in which I just met someone I know who hasn't really interacted much with African Americans this person

without fail at some point during the conversation will talk about the other black person they know and insist that i meet them. Most of the time they won't necessarily mention they are also black but 100% of the time without fail they are.

it's the strangest thing. I'm not offended per se especially I get that it probably has something to do with nervousness and trying to relate to me / make me feel comfortable but again I just find it curious

Like if the African Americans or other minorities did the opposite would white people not find it strange?

Like if you met an African American person and 20 min into a conversation and they were like you should meet my one white friend Tom as having the same skin color means you will automatically hit off/have common interests

Also, would white people find it strange if black people started randomly touching their hair without asking and without knowing the person well?

Haha! This made me laugh. It's just to relate. I could see my mom doing this.

Why is the majority of the world's population collectively referred to as a "minority?" It would seem that Europeans and European Americans, at less than two percent of births, are the actual minorities.

Posted by heliumfiasco
Haha! This made me laugh. It's just to relate. I could see my mom doing this.

right?

it's funny because it's absurd

Posted by PiscesMarsFighter29
Why is the majority of the world's population collectively referred to as a "minority?" It would seem that Europeans and European Americans, at less than two percent of births, are the actual minorities.

yeah it's not a great term

i usually don't use it for this very reason.

I feared the terms i normally use e.g- "historically disenfranchised" or "people from marginalized communities" would be even more alienating and subsequently discourage people from responding.

i also usually only use those terms when I write or am conducting some sort of political diatribe targeting social and economic injustice.

this post is supposed to be a lot lighter in tone.

Posted by ScorpioTruth
I've seen it in action. My sister does this with ME.. although I am white my son is biracial. She volunteers at a church to minister to kids and she always makes it a point to tell me about some little boy or girl and how they are black, as if it makes any difference in the world in regards to what she is talking about. It's irritating to me as well.

doesn't irritate me

just confuses the hell out of me.

but if I were you it would irritate me.

on one note it's positive that she is thinking about the welfare of your son

and making sure he is around people that look like him

on the other note it' also alienating and weird that even his own family member

possibly just see his race/thinks about it all the time

Posted by CaramelizedCoffee
I hate most other black women so please don't introduce me.

The hot pretty ones who are super successful or gay are my ride or dies . They're cute sweet and generally nice and smile at me.

But if it's a basic African American woman with fuking afro puffs

I'm out. I already know bytch hates me on sight

afro puffs are awesome

i love the movement black women are taking to embrace their natural hair

especially since it's been a source of shame and stigmatization for centuries.

i agree with bell hooks in that straightening our hair is a form of internalized white supremacy.

but yeah

most chocolate people...don't like me

we can't relate most times..

i love everyone though especially the black and brown.

That seems bizarre. Where do you live?

Yes it has happened, but each time it does it usually ends up like they're trying to validate the "diversity" of their friends, or think that for SOME reason I know them.

In a different state than I'm from.

That I've never been to.

"See? I have ___ friends!" Like hey, how many times do you actually hit this person up??

About the hair, I actually did this to prove a point. I just went around touching my friend's hair and they looked at me like "wtf are you doing". I simply told them if it's not alright for me to do it to you without asking, then you CAN'T F***ING DO IT TO ME WITHOUT ASKING. I kept doing it for a week until they finally got the point. If you wanna touch a small 'fro, go buy a wig, or ASK lmao

Posted by ScorpioTruth

Posted by Adreamuponwaking

Posted by ScorpioTruth
I've seen it in action. My sister does this with ME.. although I am white my son is biracial. She volunteers at a church to minister to kids and she always makes it a point to tell me about some little boy or girl and how they are black, as if it makes any difference in the world in regards to what she is talking about. It's irritating to me as well.

doesn't irritate me

just confuses the hell out of me.

but if I were you it would irritate me.

on one note it's positive that she is thinking about the welfare of your son

and making sure he is around people that look like him

on the other note it' also alienating and weird that even his own family member

possibly just see his race/thinks about it all the time

I know she's not doing it to purposely irritate me but it does irritate me. Because in my opinion it does alienate him and black kids in general. Her kids are half Puerto Rican but I could never see myself saying something like "this little Puerto Rican baby is so cute". I hope I'm making sense...

click to expand

or worse every "Hispanic" kid you came across

not just Puerto Ricans

but Mexicans, Guatemalans ...

i know you are incapable of doing that but if you did as a teaching lesson...i think she might get the point

but yeah i totally get what you're saying.

Posted by LadyNeptune
That seems bizarre. Where do you live?

LA!!!!!!

that's why it's so crazy.

I mean I expect this behavior somewhere else but my hometown....really?

it did happen in places I rarely frequent though....

the most recent occurrence was in Chatsworth

Posted by ScorpioTruth
And she has always been awkward as hell, especially if we were in a room or nightclub that was full of predominately black people. I could literally see her squirm. She would ask to leave. She could never just relax. I love her to death but she's always been awkward and she knows I know that about her so maybe that's why she does it but then it just makes it even more awkward and irritates me. —

yeah i don't get it

i mean you can reframe it and understand that people like us are lucky in that we are privileged in knowing that phenotype doesn't make for innate difference.

we are all the same. we all want the same things in life.

Posted by ScorpioTruth

Posted by Adreamuponwaking

Posted by ScorpioTruth

Posted by Adreamuponwaking

Posted by ScorpioTruth
I've seen it in action. My sister does this with ME.. although I am white my son is biracial. She volunteers at a church to minister to kids and she always makes it a point to tell me about some little boy or girl and how they are black, as if it makes any difference in the world in regards to what she is talking about. It's irritating to me as well.

doesn't irritate me

just confuses the hell out of me.

but if I were you it would irritate me.

on one note it's positive that she is thinking about the welfare of your son

and making sure he is around people that look like him

on the other note it' also alienating and weird that even his own family member

possibly just see his race/thinks about it all the time

I know she's not doing it to purposely irritate me but it does irritate me. Because in my opinion it does alienate him and black kids in general. Her kids are half Puerto Rican but I could never see myself saying something like "this little Puerto Rican baby is so cute". I hope I'm making sense...

or worse every "Hispanic" kid you came across

not just Puerto Ricans

but Mexicans, Guatemalans ...

i know you are incapable of doing that but if you did as a teaching lesson...i think she might get the point

but yeah i totally get what you're saying.

Sorry I didn't mean to rant. Lol ? I've talked to my sons dad about this before.. it's bothered me for a while so funny that you posted this and the floodgates opened. Maybe I just need to have a talk with her.

click to expand

don't apologize

i think your feedback has been super constructive

i love your share

and i think that having a talk with your sister is a wonderful idea

...

i think it's especially important if your son is going to be around her

she could inadvertently do psychological harm.....

Posted by urbane101
Yes it has happened, but each time it does it usually ends up like they're trying to validate the "diversity" of their friends, or think that for SOME reason I know them.

About the hair, I actually did this to prove a point. I just went around touching my friend's hair and they looked at me like "wtf are you doing". I simply told them if it's not alright for me to do it to you without asking, then you CAN'T F***ING DO IT TO ME WITHOUT ASKING. I kept doing it for a week until they finally got the point. If you wanna touch a small 'fro, go buy a wig, or ASK lmao

*applauds*

Guilty as charged! I would NEVER touch hair but I always wanted to.

And I don't talk about my 'minority' friends to others of same skin color.

However I can totally relate.

And to be honest - it is suppressed prejudism in people. I do have plenty of white people around me with black partners. My family members who are Jewish adopted black kids after their friend died.

I admire them for adopting 2 kids and not separate them. Not for color but for the fact of adoption.

And I will bring it up ONLY if it is coming up in conversation naturally.

I can understand totally what OP is saying. However until world is all mixed up totally in one color - this issue will exist and I think honestly we all came a long way to better now. But it is still a long way to go.

God bless us all!!! ?

Posted by ScorpioTruth

Posted by Adreamuponwaking

Posted by ScorpioTruth
And she has always been awkward as hell, especially if we were in a room or nightclub that was full of predominately black people. I could literally see her squirm. She would ask to leave. She could never just relax. I love her to death but she's always been awkward and she knows I know that about her so maybe that's why she does it but then it just makes it even more awkward and irritates me. —

yeah i don't get it

i mean you can reframe it and understand that people like us are lucky in that we are privileged in knowing that phenotype doesn't make for innate difference.

we are all the same. we all want the same things in life.

Exactly. People are people. I don't get it either.

click to expand

people watch too much tv

or don't critically think

....

but again i know hat I'm lucky to have grown up with people from many different backgrounds...and not just seeing them

i went to school and was friends with japanese, Korean , Indian , Columbian , and jamaican kids

white people were the minority actuality at this school i went to

it also helps that i have a very fair mother...green eyes...blonde hair...

while my dad is darker than me but has more recent western European ancestry.....

so basically

from a very young age i knew that we were all mixed...and "race" was essentially BS

...not everyone has the same background as me though

so i get it

Posted by 5TwentyOne
Randomly touching my hair = foreplay.

if I was a white dude with any hair texture and a girl did it....

i would be like hell yeah it's on....

when you are a black woman and your Indian boss does it

or some white women you recently met who you aren't even friends with

different story

People like to point out that they had a best friend that is black, at some point in their life.

Posted by Adreamuponwaking

Posted by LadyNeptune
That seems bizarre. Where do you live?

LA!!!!!!

that's why it's so crazy.

I mean I expect this behavior somewhere else but my hometown....really?

it did happen in places I rarely frequent though....

the most recent occurrence was in Chatsworth

click to expand

Strange.

Posted by CaramelizedCoffee
I hate most other black women so please don't introduce me.

The hot pretty ones who are super successful or gay are my ride or dies . They're cute sweet and generally nice and smile at me.

But if it's a basic African American woman with fuking afro puffs

I'm out. I already know bytch hates me on sight

What hair style s are the super successful ones?

Posted by CaramelizedCoffee

Posted by Adreamuponwaking

Posted by CaramelizedCoffee
I hate most other black women so please don't introduce me.

The hot pretty ones who are super successful or gay are my ride or dies . They're cute sweet and generally nice and smile at me.

But if it's a basic African American woman with fuking afro puffs

I'm out. I already know bytch hates me on sight

afro puffs are awesome

i love the movement black women are taking to embrace their natural hair

especially since it's been a source of shame and stigmatization for centuries.

i agree with bell hooks in that straightening our hair is a form of internalized white supremacy.

but yeah

most chocolate people...don't like me

we can't relate most times..

i love everyone though especially the black and brown.

I disagree. I don't think style of hair has anything to do with how you feel about yourself internally

click to expand

not so much hair style ......

straightening your hair

and the language around it........

in the black community, it is known.......

there is a lot of shaming that goes on...especially by black women....

references to hair texture and terms like "good hair"..... are ubiquitious

however talking to other black women about this has been really inspiring.....

i know a lot of women including myself started wearing braids or their hair natural in response

to our recent social climate regarding racial injustices...

it's for political solidarity

Posted by CaramelizedCoffee

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by CaramelizedCoffee
I hate most other black women so please don't introduce me.

The hot pretty ones who are super successful or gay are my ride or dies . They're cute sweet and generally nice and smile at me.

But if it's a basic African American woman with fuking afro puffs

I'm out. I already know bytch hates me on sight

What hair style s are the super successful ones?

I digress. Black women come in all shapes and sizes

African American women tend to hate me. The ones i found that didn't were super happy and confident with themselves...

So i shouldn't generalize about 1 or 2 individuals

click to expand

So only successful/confident women or lesbians like you?

Women must feel threatened by you. Which is ironic when you think about it... If only they knew you were your own worse enemy.

Posted by CaramelizedCoffee

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by CaramelizedCoffee

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by CaramelizedCoffee
I hate most other black women so please don't introduce me.

The hot pretty ones who are super successful or gay are my ride or dies . They're cute sweet and generally nice and smile at me.

But if it's a basic African American woman with fuking afro puffs

I'm out. I already know bytch hates me on sight

What hair style s are the super successful ones?

I digress. Black women come in all shapes and sizes

African American women tend to hate me. The ones i found that didn't were super happy and confident with themselves...

So i shouldn't generalize about 1 or 2 individuals

So only successful/confident women or lesbians like you?

Women must feel threatened by you. Which is ironic when you think about it... If only they knew you were your own worse enemy.

And others if they step to me

I'm a thug.

click to expand

since when are you a lesbian?lol

Yea I've been in this situation before .. It's amusing & doesn't bother me much .. I view it as a person trying their best to relate to me

title: Minorities have you experienced this......

Posted by Adreamuponwaking

.... who hasn't really interacted much with African Americans

Racist black people are absurd.

NOW, you believe that blacks are the only minorities ....

Posted by LadyNeptune
That seems bizarre. Where do you live?

This isn't bizarre, it's a common occurrence unfortunately. Kind of like "I have a best friend that's black" It's sad.

I have a french friend that loves getting a rise out of people by moving her purse out of the way when a Caucasian comes near her. She thinks it's payback for what her mixed boys will go through when they get older.

Funniest shit EVER. You should see the shocked look on their faces when she does this.

Posted by juliettee

Posted by Adreamuponwaking
So a funny thing keeps happening to me.....

whenever I find myself in an environment in which I just met someone I know who hasn't really interacted much with African Americans this person

without fail at some point during the conversation will talk about the other black person they know and insist that i meet them. Most of the time they won't necessarily mention they are also black but 100% of the time without fail they are.

it's the strangest thing. I'm not offended per se especially I get that it probably has something to do with nervousness and trying to relate to me / make me feel comfortable but again I just find it curious

Like if the African Americans or other minorities did the opposite would white people not find it strange?

Like if you met an African American person and 20 min into a conversation and they were like you should meet my one white friend Tom as having the same skin color means you will automatically hit off/have common interests

Also, would white people find it strange if black people started randomly touching their hair without asking and without knowing the person well?

it sounds like when straight people who have a gay friend immediately want to introduce them with another gay friend, cause they just have to get along lol.

click to expand

yeah or worse they try to set them up.

I've experienced this too btw

Posted by Adreamuponwaking
So a funny thing keeps happening to me.....

whenever I find myself in an environment in which I just met someone I know who hasn't really interacted much with African Americans this person

without fail at some point during the conversation will talk about the other black person they know and insist that i meet them. Most of the time they won't necessarily mention they are also black but 100% of the time without fail they are.

it's the strangest thing. I'm not offended per se especially I get that it probably has something to do with nervousness and trying to relate to me / make me feel comfortable but again I just find it curious

Like if the African Americans or other minorities did the opposite would white people not find it strange?

Like if you met an African American person and 20 min into a conversation and they were like you should meet my one white friend Tom as having the same skin color means you will automatically hit off/have common interests

Also, would white people find it strange if black people started randomly touching their hair without asking and without knowing the person well?

Lol. It doesn't happen (minus the hair reference....happens all the time), but I often get the reference to "black" music, artist or social/political issues.

"So what do you think about.....?" I like to mess with people 90% of the time so I usually respond with some weird answer that throws them off.

I once referred to Obama as "...oh that Mexican guy".

Since we are on this topic lol 😄

I also can't stand when someone is describing an incident and they say " And then this black guy..... " I never hear them say "This White guy" Why does color have to be included when some guy did something. It irritates the heck out of me. It's one of my pet peeves and I'll stop listening to the conversation.

Posted by PhoenixRising

Posted by Adreamuponwaking
So a funny thing keeps happening to me.....

whenever I find myself in an environment in which I just met someone I know who hasn't really interacted much with African Americans this person

without fail at some point during the conversation will talk about the other black person they know and insist that i meet them. Most of the time they won't necessarily mention they are also black but 100% of the time without fail they are.

it's the strangest thing. I'm not offended per se especially I get that it probably has something to do with nervousness and trying to relate to me / make me feel comfortable but again I just find it curious

Like if the African Americans or other minorities did the opposite would white people not find it strange?

Like if you met an African American person and 20 min into a conversation and they were like you should meet my one white friend Tom as having the same skin color means you will automatically hit off/have common interests

Also, would white people find it strange if black people started randomly touching their hair without asking and without knowing the person well?

Lol. It doesn't happen (minus the hair reference....happens all the time), but I often get the reference to "black" music, artist or social/political issues.

"So what you think about.....?" I like to mess with people 90% of the time so I usually respond with some weird answer that throws them off.

I once referred to Obama as "...oh that Mexican guy".

click to expand

lol

i like your style

Posted by urbane101
If you wanna touch a small 'fro, go buy a wig, or ASK...

Lol.

I'll stick with they need to buy a wig. I'm not a pet to be fondled. Unless you're my stylist or my man, keep your hands off my head.

I slapped someone hand back so hard once pulling on my curls.

Posted by juliettee

Posted by saggurl88
Since we are on this topic lol 😄

I also can't stand when someone is describing an incident and they say " And then this black guy..... " I never hear them say "This White guy" Why does color have to be included when some guy did something. It irritates the heck out of me. It's one of my pet peeves and I'll stop listening to the conversation.

that's true, why would anyone mention color. but don't le

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sorry my kid had a thought. she also hates when someone touches her. these gybreshe is her's. sorry!

click to expand

Wow! Your kid knows how to work the quote button too. Very nice!!

Posted by seraph
The American Experience is so weird.

It's as if ethnocultural diversity started there just last Saturday.

This isn't isolated to Americans.

Posted by PVJamz

Posted by PhoenixRising

Posted by urbane101
If you wanna touch a small 'fro, go buy a wig, or ASK...

Lol.

I'll stick with they need to buy a wig. I'm not a pet to be fondled. Unless you're my stylist or my man, keep your hands off my head.

I slapped someone hand back so hard once pulling on my curls.

I had a French canadian roommate in college. This is back when I used to relax, one day we were both in the bathroom doing our hair and I felt something in the back of my head and was like wtf... Looked up in the mirror and she had her fingers in the back of my head. Uh..I understand the curiosity but asking first is always a good idea.

click to expand

I don't give permission even if someone asks me. I won't go off, I will just politely decline.

I just find it offensive. Although it is no where is the same category, it feels reminiscent of the experience of women like Sarah Baartman. It's hair. It's made of keratin, water, has cuticles and grows just like yours does. There is no need to analyze, pick at it or inspect it like it's some phenomenon.

Posted by CaramelizedCoffee
I hate most other black women so please don't introduce me.

The hot pretty ones who are super successful or gay are my ride or dies . They're cute sweet and generally nice and smile at me.

But if it's a basic African American woman with fuking afro puffs

I'm out. I already know bytch hates me on sight

How do you know that they hate you on site? I love seeing other Black women. I smile and majority of them smile back.

This happens a little too often to me. lol

On the phone with customers, noticeable southern, urban accent, professional though.

They're able to immediately spot my race from my accent.

They go into stories of how their best friends, cousin, sister's, aunt twice removed was so sweet and if I also ate chitterlings or because Im from a certain city, I must know (insert random black name) as well.

In the office where I work, don't let me switch up my hair style . I'm natural but I get my hair blown out or I'll get it braided or a sew in. Hooooonnnneeeyyyyy, as soon a Debra says, "GREAT hair Bianca" I have to say, "don't yall start this petting shit today" lol

They get it now. I had to throw them off a bit by randomly invading their personal space. lol.

This is why love her - (Hilarious)