Things your Bartender Won't Tell You

1. Yell, whistle, or wave money and I'm going to make you wait. Make eye contact and smile, and I'll come over as soon as I can. Know what you want and have your money ready. Don't create a traffic jam.

2. Start a tab. If I swipe your card five times this evening, that's five times as much paperwork I have to do at 4 a.m.

3. You want a drink made 'strong?' Then order a double-for double the price.

4. Liquor sales in bars and restaurants were down 2.2 percent last year. Even beer sales are slow. But people scrimp on food first, drinks second.

5. A lot of bars have comp tabs, which allows me to give away drinks. It's smart business and helps build a base of regulars

6. Bars that don't have regulars (in hotels, airports) have started using wireless gadgets that measure how much is poured and automatically ring up each shot. They're meant to prevent overpouring and to cut losses, but I don't like them-neither do customers.

7. If your tipping guideline is still 'a buck a drink,' listen closely: That doesn't fly if you order a $ 12 cocktail. Tip at least 15 percent.

8. At some bars, the sliced fruit garnishes sit out until they??re gone, sometimes for days. Munch accordingly.

9. The smoothest guys compliment a woman, then walk away-it's very nonthreatening

10. I have the police on speed dial, and I never hesitate to call.

11. Don't order a round of drinks after last call. Last call applies to everyone-even you.

12. Some of us get a cut from the cab company when we call a taxi for a tipsy patron. Not that I've ever done that, of course.

13. Last week, a couple had a little too much and got into a dumb argument, then asked me to choose the 'winner' of the fight. There isn't a tip big enough to get me involved in that situation!

14.??If I cut you off, don't argue.?? If anything, you should apologize if you??ve made a scene.

15.??Get a room.?? The more you make out with your date, the closer you are to being cut off

16. ??I've heard it all. ??One guy told me I had the worst smile he—d ever seen. I found out that he thinks a girl won—t remember him unless he puts her down. I guess it worked; I'm telling you this story three weeks later.—?



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17.??Think tending bar isn't a real career— You??re wrong. The craft of bartending is coming back, and some of us are even called —mixologists?? now.

18.?? I love sharing what I know.?? If it's not busy, ask me about the history of drink or the latest cocktail I??ve invented. You??ll learn something new.

19.?? I like a sophisticated palate.??You??ll win points with me if you request gin in your martini

20.?? My knees hurt.?? Bar mats prevent slipping, but I really like them for the cushioning. I use sole inserts in my shoes, too

21.?? I can tell if your date is going well or not.?? And I notice if you bring in a new date every week

22.?? Everyone should bartend a few nights in his life.??You learn so much about people.

23.?? I'm not a piece of meat.?? If you??re going to hit on me all night, at least leave a big tip.

24.?? It happens every time.?? The songs you line up on the jukebox will play right as you??re leaving

25.?? I do more than mix drinks.?? I love being your psychiatrist-matchmaker-entertainer-friend. Otherwise, I wouldn't tend bar

26.?? Please, take a cab.——

Posted by CluelessCancer
or you could keep it hood and do it like chicks in Oakland and drink a bottle in your car. lol. ghetto!

Lol!!! Us country gals do that too! Patron shots in the care before, during and after!
Two of my BFFs even keep a flask in their purse!

car. Not care! lol!

So, has anyone tended bar? Curious to hear some feedback.

We would have a blast together!!!!

😈

Wait truecap, are you a bartender?

Nope. I copied it off a cosmo thing.

Truecap, add to that list,

?? double check your tab, I might have overcharged you for something, especially if you are drunk and rude

?? stop drooling all over the bar unless you tip well

?? if you want to drink out of a glass, make sure to wipe the rim off, excess lipstick is a bitch

?? don't call me names or be rude, see that bouncer at the door? he's my bf 😛

Posted by truecap
So, has anyone tended bar? Curious to hear some feedback.

I have... in the past.

the stories are many 😛

i never tended bar
i have supported many in my life.
they way we tip we ask the bar tender to have a drink with us
they take out the cost of a drink and tell you they will have it later.

Posted by truecap
So, has anyone tended bar? Curious to hear some feedback.

Very briefly, in my 20's.

I despised waitressing/serving (it's an art, and I tip well), but cocktail servers don't have to bother with perpetual refills of "sweet or unsweet" tea, making sure the food is right, and kids making a mess smooshing french fries all over the floor, etc.

It's really hard to screw up booze. 😄

It has its own pitfalls, to be sure-- but they are more manageable to me.

One time, a couple had been drinking for a few hours-- and they were nothing out of the ordinary-- but not only did they stiff me, they left a bible tract that was folded up and printed to look like a $ 20 bill.

That was wrong on SO MANY levels.

And yeah, a lot of folks are rude, but there is usually someone apologizing for them and tipping to offset the fact that they broke the table (or something... lol)-

Obviously, I'd rather have the latter party return. Jeez.

But it's a good skill to have-- you never know. *shrugs*

🙂

If I see you walk out with one of my glasses, rest assured I will chase you down the road, no matter how fast you run.

If you want me to accidentally pour more, I'd like you to accidentally drop some money in my pocket.

Telling me I'm sexy doesn't get you a free drink, it'll usually end up in me saying you're too drunk so you should gtfo.

If you order a cocktail, I expect you to know what's in it. Don't cry later.

And no, you cannot have 10 drinks on last call, GET OUT!

I noticed a lot more tip related things in the US lol. Non existent here. Maybe on a good day when someone's feelings generous or scanning the floors for drunken people dropping their $ 20s or $ 50s.

I used to bartend in my early 20's so I've got my OWN list lol

1. Stop coming to the bar all smug like I'm supposed to remember your drink even though you only come once a year. In a given year, I serve hundreds of people, so don't be offended that I didn't remember just how you like your drink.

2. Staring me down like a creepy stalker will only make me want to limit the amount of alcohol I give you. The way I see it, the more drunk you are, the worse your creepy act will get. No more alcohol for you buddy!

3. Starting bar fights is the most pu***sy thing a man can do. No it's not macho. No it's not masculine. Don't expect any respect from me if the only time you've got balls is when you've got alcohol in you. Try starting that same fight in HIS turf & when you're completely sober. Bet you won't! .....Wuss

4. If you order food while you're sitting at the bar, don't take it out on me if your food comes out messed up. Why? B/c unlike a server, I can't always leave my bar to go in the kitchen every 5 minutes. I can't b/c I'm probably too busy dealing with the guys in 1-3

5. You see I'm busy right? You see that 10 new people just approached my bar. So why are you starring me down, mean mugging me as if doing so will make me make your drink faster?! You are just 1 of 100 honey, you are not special! In fact, people like you who use mean-mugging to intimidate your own bartender are the kinds who suck at tipping

6. Use your freakin' eyes! Actually try looking to see what beers I have on tap before asking me! If there's a big ole sign that says "Budwiser" right next to me, why act like an illiterate Ahole who can't read & ask me what all we have?! LOOK first, then ask me. Or else I'll think you're illiterate. And I don't take demands or respond well to purposely-illiterate people. Sorry

7. If you're miserable enough that you have to frequent a bar every single hour of every single day, to the point where I know your first middle & last name, along with your life story, don't be so surprised when I refuse to give you my number or bite the bait. Hell no, I don't want an alcoholic! And yes, if I see you every day, you ARE an alcoholic

Oooh now that I've gotten that off my chest.....lol.....I feel much better

Posted by Arielle83
I hate it when you ask someone what they would like and they say: BEER

lol! It's funnier when they give you a funny look as if you were trolling them asking "which?" and then repeat again "JUST beer".

BRITS AND EURO'S ON THE MOST PART ARE CHEAP BASTARDS THEY DON'T TIP WORTH A SHIT

AS FOR RUNNING A DINE AND DASH DOWN
A FRIEND OF MY FGATHERS DID THAT AND GOT SHOT
HE LIVED BUT IT FUCKED HIM UP.