How to get one last meeting with him?

Pisces male with Moon in Libra and Mercury, Venus, and Mars in Aries. I'm a Virgo female.

He and I started off great like every typical "new" relationship. We were together for 7 months, and I've known him for 10 months. We've been through a lot together in a short time. He took my virginity, and not only did we have to deal with crazy "baby mama drama" but also the loss of our baby. I know he felt like crap (especially when we lost our baby) and that I deserved better. I supported and loved him and had his back for whatever he needed. I really was his beacon of positivity, and he swears I'm happy all the time (though I'm not). And whenever he needed space when bad things occurred, I gave him that space, to which he'd always come back and "fuss" at me for not talking to him.

But since he started driving trucks by himself since July, he's grown distant and he's not talking to me at all. He can go days without talking and the conversation is getting more and more dry. He used to apologize for the dryness but now he doesn't even bother. I think he may be trying to get back with his ex who he has extensive history with or find someone else. Whenever I ask him about his behavior, he tells me he doesn't know what to tell me or he just says he doesn't know.

He feels like a stranger now, and he even treats me like one. Giving him space doesn't work, because he'd blow up my phone with a really bad temper and accuse me of messing with other dudes since I'm not talking to him (he has trust issues).

I'm more than willing to let him go, but I want one last encounter with him. I don't want him to know it's a last encounter because he'll get all clingy and mad. But it's for the best since I'm sensing I'm not what he wants anymore. I know he's not coming back this time, and it's not going to get any better. I just want to enjoy one last sexual encounter with him and leave him alone for good.

Any suggestions on how to do this without letting him know this will be the final time? I know the last time we talked about sex he sounded dissatisfied with the lack of variation. I'm more than willing to do it (if he doesn't stop me), but I don't think he believes I'll do it. So, I need some suggestions on how to get him to take the bait so I can meet him.

P. S.- He's a truck driver so it's hard to meet up with him already due to our schedules. Also, he has some items of mine and payments with me to make, but it's like he's avoiding to do it. I don't know why. Th

Why do this to yourself. No where did you state anything about him that you actually like or pleasant. As always sex doesn't make you see straight.

I'll share what a very wise Cancer said once, "Clutching at straws uses up energy you could use to swim to the other side."

Stop clutching at straws. You're only sinking fast.

^^^^^ what they said

Posted by LadyOfRebirth
So you paint yourself to be the victim in this relationship, but then want to secretly end it and trick him into giving you closure, but you can't do the same for him?

How people chose to end relationships says a lot about their character.


I hope for his sake he senses your deception and never meets you again. He deserves better than you.

No, I'm not painting myself as the victim, and I wasn't trying to get anyone to feel sorry for me. Matter fact, don't since I put myself in this for being in it so long. I'm stating things from A to Z, and it's what happened. That was our relationship, going from the good to what's happening now. I was there for him through everything but now it's time to do different things. I never said I wanted closure. We don't have to talk in person. I just wanted sex (at the rate this is going, it doesn't even have to be that anymore), to get my belongings from him, and be done with this whole situation. He knows it's the end as well and just doesn't want to tell me to maybe spare my feelings, so why put anything into words when we can just finish our business and be done?

There's nothing to talk about anymore. He wants to be a hoe, so I'm letting him go be one (literally his own words). We both know that the next time I see him I'll be getting my items from him, and he will tell me more lies about how we're going to go on dates again the next time he comes back. If anyone's being deceptive, it's him. He's going the extra mile to fill me with fluff when I've been nothing but real with him.

I wasn't asking for an analysis of my character. Maybe he does deserve better than me but I sure as hell deserve better than him. If he bothers to talk afterwards, I don't mind giving him closure. But my main goal is to simply finish the business I have with him and fully move on. Get my stuff and leave, but he's dragging the process out. I know full well if I tell him everything, he'll never return my things to me. Usually when people want things to be over, they finish any business they have together quickly and be done, so why can't he?

Posted by 88akka
@ OP - Post cut off------- continued below.

"I don't even have baby daddy drama in my life, why is this guy allowing it into his life " F- this shit - ..

I only gave him a quick advice, and did everything to let him know I wasn't interested in whatever drama he was with his ex.. Every time we were together there was something, I would simply turn around to focus on something else or changed the convo.

You should never be dragged into any baby-mama drama of any man. He needs to step up, be a man and handle it with the bitch without dragging you along.

Find yourself a new man who cares enough not drag you along with this bull shit and wants to make you happy. Virgos are lovely and yes you are always there for us when we go through hard times ,,, but know who to sacrifice for- that whom you are doing it for . will jump as quick as you do when you need help or need support.

Good luck sweetie and that you find happiness and do give yourself closure without him being present.

Thank you for being one of the few people to not bite my head off about this and being understanding. I don't really care if he does contact me ever again after this meeting. I know I should've been gone out of this long ago, but all the "should've could've would've" won't change the past. I just want to finish it, but he's not being receptive or trying to give me my items. Maybe I was being overly hopeful with the sex since I did like it, but I wasn't going to use it to manipulate him or get him back. I don't want him back. I want my things back.

Posted by livictori
Why do this to yourself. No where did you state anything about him that you actually like or pleasant. As always sex doesn't make you see straight.

I guess I was trying to get to the main point quickly while providing some background. I admired his drive and how he always went out the way to make sure I was ok. He knew exactly how to cheer me up and when I was sad. I guess what got my attention was his fun-loving side. He always made sure I was on point when I was slacking and supported me when I was feeling down. Just being there for me, and I for him was what kept us going. I was trying to put out there how we went through a lot back to back and stayed strong until he got on the road by himself. Maybe it wasn't as strong as I thought or he made me to believe.

Posted by Nemilicious
how do you finish things by having sex with him?

Have you not heard of couples having sex for the last time? They both know that it's over, so they have one last event together and go their separate ways. It's not a foreign concept or all that rare. That's kinda what I was going for, but from what you guys say it's not gonna happen.

Posted by 88akka
@ aphelps18


You are welcome. 🙂


About your things, if it is not of very importance or high value that you would have a hard time replacing.
let go of wanting to get them back or just ask him to do that last favor for you and mail them to you. I don't think he does not want to give them back, Pisces generally does not put high value on tangible things. So he may feel you don't either and doesn't think you care about them as he wouldn't care if he left a few things of his in your place.

He would be more shocked to know you don't want to see him to even get your things back than from you wanting to get your things back and see him again.

These things are very important to me and i can't replace these, and I really did not intend on leaving them at the time. I was rushing and completely forgot them at his place recently. Trust me, if I could replay the day when I left them, I would've grabbed all that stuff no matter how great we were doing at the time. I've been trying to get them back since that day, but he's been out on the road. He knows the importance of these things and that he has to pay me back. If he knows doing these things will get me out of his hair then why won't he just do it asap? i've already suggested he mails it and etc, but he hasn't done it yet.

Posted by Nemilicious

Posted by aphelps18

Posted by Nemilicious
how do you finish things by having sex with him?

Have you not heard of couples having sex for the last time? They both know that it's over, so they have one last event together and go their separate ways. It's not a foreign concept or all that rare. That's kinda what I was going for, but from what you guys say it's not gonna happen.

break up sex is a dumb concept. it's so sad that people can't leave each other with some dignity and pride these days. whatever floats your boat though.

click to expand

well that's your opinion miss.

Posted by aphelps18

Have you not heard of couples having sex for the last time?

It's not a foreign concept or all that rare.

Having break up sex, or last time sex is a foreign concept and very rare .... when the guy has told the woman he doesn't like her sex.

In fact, to have a conversation about sex, means there's been a sexual issue between you that needed discussion. He tells you that he's not satisfied with what you've got to give ....... and the above justification is your response to it when someone notices how foolish you sound?

Did your mother drop you on your head when you were a baby? And no, that isn't intended as an insult. I seriously want to know.

...... because if you suck in bed, according to him, yet, you are so oblivious to that that you think having sex with him is a good idea on your part to try and calm the waters the long enough to get your belongings is right up there with one of the most ignorant things I've heard a person say in here in a while.

Oh, and yes, I fully read between the lines here that you only want to try to have sex with him so you can trick him, because you've made it perfectly clear that he won't give you your things, so you have to think up another way to manipulate the situation.

But, how bizarre that you think sex is valid tool to use for your tricking ....

Posted by aphelps18

I know the last time we talked about sex he sounded dissatisfied with the lack of variation.

click to expand

Posted by aphelps18

I just wanted sex (...), to get my belongings from him

I know full well if I tell him everything, he'll never return my things to me.

You are very ignorant. You believe of yourself to be honest, and to not be manipulative ... yet, you ARE deceptive and manipulative and you describe yourself to be when you convey your thoughts to us.

The problem here isn't that you are this ignorant ... it's that you have no clue to this ignorance. he knows this. I know this just from this one thread, so certainly, he knew from the beginning that you were an easy target.

You say you know full well that you can't tell him everything, which the assumption has to be made here that what you are referring to is that you can't tell him that the only reason you're sticking your puss in his face is because you want him tricked by seduction so that you can grab your things and run ... which is a clear indication that you are operating under false pretenses, admittedly.

All the while, having zero clue that your puss is good enough to him to be seduced by it .... yeah, you're really that dumb.


As much as I feel bad for you, because you were likely used up by this guy ... at the same time, if you're this stupid, in where you can't put two and two together on simple equations .... then you probably deserve to be used.



My suggestion to you is to not try and date anyone at all, and work on trying to become more aware of your surroundings and aware of yourself.

Posted by aphelps18

I know he's not coming back this time

For you to say "this time" ... indicates that there have been times before this that you two have split up. So, the logical assumption is that there has been an on-going problem with you two.

and then couple that with the below ......

Posted by aphelps18

I know the last time we talked about sex he sounded dissatisfied with the lack of variation.

click to expand

To say that the "last time" you talked about sex with him clearly implies that there were times before this last time ....


... so, it's not a far reach to reach the conclusion that your relationship problems are sexual, in where you're not good enough for him to be satisfied.


You are having a break up with a guy because you can't keep him sexually ... so you decide to charm your way back in by offering up your pussy.


really?


dude, this guy picked up on this condition you have of being dumbass a long time ago, and just ran with it until the expiration date ran out. I'm not trying to hurt your feelings, because frankly, I don't believe you are capable of even grasping what I've been typing out here.

But, I'm not trying to insult you .. I'm trying to tell you straight up = you're too stupid for a Pisces.

Fish pick up on intentions before you've even spoken. He saw what you meant on your facial expression before you ever opened your mouth. And then what fell out of your mouth showed him that you are completely unaware of reality, at that point you were just a statistic, and enough to keep as a toy for entertainment for a time or two.


Do yourself a favor, and find yourself before you ever attempt another Fish.

@P-Angel:

Well thank you for your humble opinion as insulting and "real" as it may be, but I'll take it in stride since I did put my issues out there for everyone to scrutinize. I understand where you're coming from. I already am aware of how naive I was for how long this went on "til the expiration date ran out". I'm not going to beat myself up for it though. It happened, and I learned who to take seriously and who not to. He was not it since he did not see my value.

And just for the record, I've always been sincere with him so do not try to paint me into being this manipulative blonde succubus while the incubus is also a participant in this farce. And in sex, actually I was the first one voicing dissatisfaction because he never wanted to change up positions. He wouldn't let me grow. He was the one who felt like crap because he couldn't satisfy me. I only mentioned what he said recently about it (which is an exact copy of what I told him previously), not our whole sexual past since this was supposed to be all about him and what he feels. It was fun until I told him I wasn't getting off anymore, which all happened before ish hit the fan beyond repair. But yeah, I can't keep this man because I suck in the sack with him. I had one job lol. Maybe all his screams, begging, and toe-curling was fake. That's fine, but I know there's someone out there who is fine with what I offer. It's not him. Cool.

I'm not trying to "charm" my way back in with him. He doesn't want to tell me anything to spare my feelings, but I know we're done. The "expiration date" is well past, and it's time to finish our business dealings. My intentions with him have always been good and sincere. I'm not using sex (well I'm not trying to) to get back with him or to get my things. I simply wanted advice as to how to meet with him, have breakup sex, and get my things from him. I should've just said that and went into no details (or put everything out there) since it was going to be taken completely out of proportion with the bits you guys do "know". It really was all misconstrued, but if you want to paint me as this evil, "stupid", "ignorant", and basic person then fine but I know who I am.

Maybe I did make myself an easy target by going with the flow so hard, but I also had my fun. I enjoyed the energy we gave each other. We were definitely in a fantasy land together. You really didn't have to further point that out, but thank you anyway for taking the time out of your busy

OP-cut off:

to point that out at the subatomic level. You should know us Virgos beat ourselves up way harder than anyone. I know I do have plenty of growing and learning to do, but it's a process. I'm not experienced like you in life. Can anyone fully say they haven't done anything stupid in their lives or done anything to embarrass themselves or even done something crazy out of hurt or love? Ever just thought about doing something stupid but never acting on it? But anyway, really thank you for really pointing out this monstrous and naive side of mine. I'm not even being sarcastic. Eye-opening.

As for your comment about my being "too stupid" for a Pisces though, I don't see how that could be entirely true since some of my longest and most meaningful relationships have been with Pisces. All of them are currently cool with me, ask me for advice, and value my opinion as an equal. Even with this one, we were cool together and we have tons of fun when feelings aren't involved. Probably 90% of my dating pool has been Pisces completely unintentionally (ironically). I'm trying to avoid them now. lol.

And also aren't Pisces known for being out of touch with reality themselves though intuitive to others? Like problems with Pisces arise from them being "detached" or off in their own world?

Anyway, this all got so off point that I had to reanalyze what I wanted (not what happened), but thank you for your input. I got my voice back, so really thank you.

P.S.- What I was implying by "he's not coming back this time" was that whenever I gave him the space he wanted he always swam back to me after some time to recuperate. I understood because of the particular situation we were dealing with. As I said above, we dealt with a lot of things together. It wasn't ever just sex. It was a lot more tied into our problems. But I should expect you not being capable of understanding because you weren't in it, and I haven't told the whole story. Regardless, thank you for taking the time to help me see how flawed as a human being I am with what very little I gave you. I'm not going to play this game since that's sending off this message that I'm a horrible person when I know I'm not. ^_^ lol.

Nobody said you were horrible, I certainly didn't.

Talk about taking something out of context.


You ARE too stupid for a Pisces. And if you have all of those wonderful Pisces who are so awesome and helpful and such powerful forces in your life .... then what are you doing here whining to strangers who don't know your heart?

Unless maybe you're just lying, and only said that to try and look better than you are.


Credit should be given where it's due, and it is your credit that you realize that people can only comment on what you've said. Most people go off on some irrational tangent saying bullshit like, "you don't know me" .... no shit Sherlock, we only know what you've said. You have enough wits about you to comprehend that whatever people say in here is a response to what you've said. Most people aren't bright enough to actually get that concept.


Back to sex. It's irrelevant how many times you've curled his toes, and in you describing your sex with him because you were feeling defensive is irrelevant to the point.

the point is .... he's not satisfied NOW. What happened in the past as far as his satisfaction, is the past. We are talking NOW.

NOW, he doesn't want your pussy .... yet, you weren't bright enough to put the two and two together and came in here to state that you wanted to have break up sex ..... when he doesn't want your puss in his face.


It's like you're standing there banging your head against the wall and complaining because you can't figure out why you have a headache.

If you really want to help this situation ... then back off, and let the dust settle.

it appears as though you want to keep stabbing a horse that is already dead.

If you are bright enough for a Pisces ... then act like it.



Fall away. Your possessions aren't as important as your dignity. And he doesn't want your ass anylonger, so have some decency to realize it, and stop making a fool of yourself.

I truly hope you find yourself.

Posted by aphelps18

..... since July, he's grown distant and he's not talking to me at all. I think he may be trying to get back with his ex who he has extensive history with or find someone else.

.... we talked about sex he sounded dissatisfied with the lack of variation. I'm more than willing to do it (if he doesn't stop me), but I don't think he believes I'll do it.

I just want to enjoy one last sexual encounter with him and leave him alone for good.

So, I need some suggestions on how to get him to take the bait so I can meet him.

As I go back through this, reading between the lines ..... the truth becomes clear. Putting the quotes of yours above together ... this is how it appears ...


1. you realize that he's not present, that perhaps he is with another woman, maybe the ex

2. there is something sexual that you aren't doing ... you even refer to this action as "it" ... so whatever "it" is that you're not doing that he wants, you NOW want to do "it". You want to have this last encounter to prove to him that you will do "it"

3. so this last encounter that you want is so you can put "it" to him, to show him that you're capable of sticking it to him, if the only time you're willing to do "it" for him, is as you are walking out of the door.

that's vengeance. you only want to fuck him once last time to try and maneuver him.

4. bait? so you can say the word "bait", describe the intention behind the deception ... and still believe you are being honest?



wow .... just wow