JiyoSmiling
@JiyoSmiling
16 Years
Comments: 0 · Posts: 58 · Topics: 3
About dating & sex
Well, I'm inexperienced...lol...but I think if you sleep with someone too soon it can ruin the potential of the relationship.
I'm not sure if I would go as far as to say there should be a set time frame, because it would all depend on how much time you spent together, and on what depth/level you got to know eachother during that time.
I'm not sure if I would go as far as to say there should be a set time frame, because it would all depend on how much time you spent together, and on what depth/level you got to know eachother during that time.
Jiyo,
I read the same book! Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man. Yes, I do think that is a bit unrealistic. But I do also think that a woman should never be intimate with a man unless she feels completely comfortable AND i DO think that men should not just be handed sex unless that it is strickly a sexual relationship. In my opninion, it's about finding that balance.
But that is a pretty good book. 🙂
I read the same book! Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man. Yes, I do think that is a bit unrealistic. But I do also think that a woman should never be intimate with a man unless she feels completely comfortable AND i DO think that men should not just be handed sex unless that it is strickly a sexual relationship. In my opninion, it's about finding that balance.
But that is a pretty good book. 🙂
^ you're my new hero. 🙂
Posted by Aqualeo
These books such as 'act like a lady think like a man' are hilarious. A man writes them and he tells you that if you want to be with a man then you have to think like a man, kinda gay really!
Also seems to imply that how and what women think is irrelevant its strange don't you think considering that we are supposed to be liberalised!
AquaLeo...Have you read the book?
The book is not about trying to transform a woman into a man, it's quiet the opposite actually 🙂 The book is just an inside look at the way a man thinks & lets face it, men think differently than women. Men have different hormones. more or less of the ones that we do which all affects the way one operates. I can't know for certain exactly what it's like to be, think & act like a man but I don't mind insight from one if I'm at all interested in having a relationship with one. The book also says to ACT like a LADY, because a real man wants a lady not a female who acts like a man & we have a whole slew of those running around now.
It's kinda like your response to this post AquaLeo....you've never read the book yet you say that it's hilarious, gay (as in happy? or homosexual?) & then say that the book implies...when you wouldn't REALLY know would you having not read it. Now you can make a bunch of assumptions about men & how they think or feel but you wouldn't REALLY know if you're ignorant in the subject matter. The only way to gain knowledge is to educate yourself & have different life experiences. I certainly wouldn't throw on some scuba gear & jump into the sea if I wanted to go deep sea diving without 1st educating myself on how to deep sea dive so that I could have a nice, safe, enjoyable experience. SO I want a relationship with a man, I'd like to educate myself on men so that I can have a nice, safe, enjoyable experience. NOT so that I can change myself into a man LOL
Posted by Aqualeo
These books such as 'act like a lady think like a man' are hilarious. A man writes them and he tells you that if you want to be with a man then you have to think like a man, kinda gay really!
Also seems to imply that how and what women think is irrelevant its strange don't you think considering that we are supposed to be liberalised!
Also there is nothing in the book that discounts what a woman thinks, feels or wants. Again it's the opposite. If you would read the book you would see that much of the book, directed at women of course, encourages women to have standards & respect for herself & to not allow men run games on them.
Yes we are liberalized, liberal=free. Free from oppression, which I don't think has been a problem for some time now but you see women took equal rights & went CRAZY with the shit! & just so you know right now....I really am a woman 🙂 Women were given the right to work for equal pay, vote etc & YES we should have all of these rights but where in the womens movement did it say that women should start denying who they are & start acting like men? OR even worse, thinking & acting like we are BETTER than men? Because I see wayyy tooo much of that & I think it's vary sad indeed.
Look at Brianas icon for instance.... A woman standing OVER a man who is on his hands & knees with her finger pointing at him as if he is a child being chastised. As if to imply 🙂 that I am a woman, you will listen to what I say, I'm Better than you!
What if a man had an icon like that? With a woman down on her hands & knees? would that be acceptable to you. See that isn't equal. You want equal rights GOOD cuz I do too but I don't want to walk around with this air of I'm better than you, I don't need you, I'm miss independent Blah blah blah Anyone with half a brain knows that women are perfectly capable of being independent but I don't really see the point of shouting about it constantly. It's kinda reminds me of people who talk about how great they are all the time but underneath it all are just extremely insecure people trying to convince THEMSELVES of something. That's annoying IMO 🙂
Posted by JiyoSmilingPosted by Aqualeo
These books such as 'act like a lady think like a man' are hilarious. A man writes them and he tells you that if you want to be with a man then you have to think like a man, kinda gay really!
Also seems to imply that how and what women think is irrelevant its strange don't you think considering that we are supposed to be liberalised!
Also there is nothing in the book that discounts what a woman thinks, feels or wants. Again it's the opposite. If you would read the book you would see that much of the book, directed at women of course, encourages women to have standards & respect for herself & to not allow men run games on them.
Yes we are liberalized, liberal=free. Free from oppression, which I don't think has been a problem for some time now but you see women took equal rights & went CRAZY with the shit! & just so you know right now....I really am a woman 🙂 Women were given the right to work for equal pay, vote etc & YES we should have all of these rights but where in the womens movement did it say that women should start denying who they are & start acting like men? OR even worse, thinking & acting like we are BETTER than men? Because I see wayyy tooo much of that & I think it's vary sad indeed.
Look at Brianas icon for instance.... A woman standing OVER a man who is on his hands & knees with her finger pointing at him as if he is a child being chastised. As if to imply 🙂 that I am a woman, you will listen to what I say, I'm Better than you!
What if a man had an icon like that? With a woman down on her hands & knees? would that be acceptable to you. See that isn't equal. You want equal rights GOOD cuz I do too but I don't want to walk around with this air of I'm better than you, I don't need you, I'm miss independent Blah blah blah Anyone with half a brain knows that women are perfectly capable of being independent but I don't really see the point of shouting about it constantly. It's kinda reminds me of people who talk about how great they are all the time but underneath it all are just extremely insecure people trying to convince THEMSELVES of something. That's annoying IMO 🙂click to expand
Yeah. I do that in real life.....................................
It's a complete and literal representation of how I really feel about men.
😄
for me personally, there's no set time frame. but generally, i'd much rather go 90 days than only three dates.
Three dates is not realistic, that guy is an asshole (rofl well in the case of a lady at least 😉).
For women the least you should wait is a month... well at least that is my rule, I do so because I want to feel out the guy and truly see what he's about, I try to push for more than a month though just to see if he's worth it and if he would wait.
For women the least you should wait is a month... well at least that is my rule, I do so because I want to feel out the guy and truly see what he's about, I try to push for more than a month though just to see if he's worth it and if he would wait.
Here's my two cents. Some propose waiting a month, 5 dates and that is fine.
But that isnt exactly realistic when you are in the working world. I work unpredictable, sometimes long shifts at different times just to pay the rent.
And why it is almost impossible for me to be in a relationship right now. I'm betting a lot of others male and female are in the same boat.
I've been seeking a FWB for that same reason. If there is chemistry and things are going well, then why does hooking up on the 2nd let alone first date matter? Basically if I like you and you like me, let's cut the crap and see what happens
For us now being in the 21st century, America still has extremely puritannical views on sexuality. I place fault on both men and women for that stalled prgoression.
If more men would quit having that extreme old school view of "she's gotta be a slut if we're having sex on the first date" then women wouldnt make a big issue out of timing with sex. I personally guarantee that if half of the female posters on here knew there would be no judgement coming from men, reservations about hooking up too soon go out the window.
I've said it before,but is true that men and women take dating much too seriously. You dont always have to be primarily looking for Ms. Right or Prince Charming. Especially if your work schedule nixes any chance of having a real relationship.
That's why a lot of relationships/marriages are failing now adays. Because some men and women wont admit that they really cant balance gruelling work schedules and a relationship.
But that isnt exactly realistic when you are in the working world. I work unpredictable, sometimes long shifts at different times just to pay the rent.
And why it is almost impossible for me to be in a relationship right now. I'm betting a lot of others male and female are in the same boat.
I've been seeking a FWB for that same reason. If there is chemistry and things are going well, then why does hooking up on the 2nd let alone first date matter? Basically if I like you and you like me, let's cut the crap and see what happens
For us now being in the 21st century, America still has extremely puritannical views on sexuality. I place fault on both men and women for that stalled prgoression.
If more men would quit having that extreme old school view of "she's gotta be a slut if we're having sex on the first date" then women wouldnt make a big issue out of timing with sex. I personally guarantee that if half of the female posters on here knew there would be no judgement coming from men, reservations about hooking up too soon go out the window.
I've said it before,but is true that men and women take dating much too seriously. You dont always have to be primarily looking for Ms. Right or Prince Charming. Especially if your work schedule nixes any chance of having a real relationship.
That's why a lot of relationships/marriages are failing now adays. Because some men and women wont admit that they really cant balance gruelling work schedules and a relationship.
Hey Bull nice to see you too.
You're so right, I'm the total douchebag for being honest and upfront with a girl about having a good time. Instead of being like every other cowardly asshat who leads women on into a "serious" relationship when all they're wanting is steady sex, not love.
Not everything is black and white. I'm not going to waste somebody's time with a relationship if we are hardly able to see each other due to crap work schedules.
I get tired of the media and some (not all) females on here trying to paint the picture of women not just wanting sex for the sake of it. Yes, there are women who need a romantic connection to have sex.
But there is plenty of women who just want to get laid and not get mired down in a relationship due to whatever circumstances going on in their lives. It's just a lot of women in the country and some (again not all) on this board are too scared of being judged/criticized for only wanting to have a "happy" ending. Sex is great with love and can be just as fantastic without. Romantic attachments should be formed on mental connection, not clitoral and erectional ones.
I wish people would get some balls and stop caring about what others think. There's that saying not everybody's going to like you and that is true
It took me a long time to accept it though.
Bottom line, you cant live life by other people's standards. Cause most of the time judgemental people tend to be the biggest hypocrites of them all.
You're so right, I'm the total douchebag for being honest and upfront with a girl about having a good time. Instead of being like every other cowardly asshat who leads women on into a "serious" relationship when all they're wanting is steady sex, not love.
Not everything is black and white. I'm not going to waste somebody's time with a relationship if we are hardly able to see each other due to crap work schedules.
I get tired of the media and some (not all) females on here trying to paint the picture of women not just wanting sex for the sake of it. Yes, there are women who need a romantic connection to have sex.
But there is plenty of women who just want to get laid and not get mired down in a relationship due to whatever circumstances going on in their lives. It's just a lot of women in the country and some (again not all) on this board are too scared of being judged/criticized for only wanting to have a "happy" ending. Sex is great with love and can be just as fantastic without. Romantic attachments should be formed on mental connection, not clitoral and erectional ones.
I wish people would get some balls and stop caring about what others think. There's that saying not everybody's going to like you and that is true
It took me a long time to accept it though.
Bottom line, you cant live life by other people's standards. Cause most of the time judgemental people tend to be the biggest hypocrites of them all.
"personally guarantee that if half of the female posters on here knew there would be no judgement coming from men, reservations about hooking up too soon go out the window."
Totally agree. Sure, some women need to feel a 'connection' first, but I believe that a huge part for even needing to feel that connection in the first place, has to do with not wanting to feel like a slut.
Also keep in mind that MOST of the judgments come from other women, not men.
I've said it time and time again. Its not the sex that turns a man off (what sense does that even make), its the insecurity a woman displays after the fact, b/c of her guilt about going against societies rules about how long shes supposed to wait before 'giving it up'.
That term in and of itself, 'giving it up' reinforces said rules. It has a negative connotation. Rather than looking at sex as an equally enjoyable experience, women look at it as something being taken from them.
The key to not looking like a slut has little to do with not having sex on the first second or third date. Its about maintaining your self respect, worth and integrity, with WHATEVER you decide to do.
I have no 'rules' for when to have sex. If it feels right, I'm for it, whether that be the first date, the 8th date, or the 20th date.
Totally agree. Sure, some women need to feel a 'connection' first, but I believe that a huge part for even needing to feel that connection in the first place, has to do with not wanting to feel like a slut.
Also keep in mind that MOST of the judgments come from other women, not men.
I've said it time and time again. Its not the sex that turns a man off (what sense does that even make), its the insecurity a woman displays after the fact, b/c of her guilt about going against societies rules about how long shes supposed to wait before 'giving it up'.
That term in and of itself, 'giving it up' reinforces said rules. It has a negative connotation. Rather than looking at sex as an equally enjoyable experience, women look at it as something being taken from them.
The key to not looking like a slut has little to do with not having sex on the first second or third date. Its about maintaining your self respect, worth and integrity, with WHATEVER you decide to do.
I have no 'rules' for when to have sex. If it feels right, I'm for it, whether that be the first date, the 8th date, or the 20th date.
Posted by MsPisces.
"
Also keep in mind that MOST of the judgments come from other women, not men...
I have no 'rules' for when to have sex. If it feels right, I'm for it, whether that be the first date, the 8th date, or the 20th date.
I'll cosign. Instead of people worrying about what OTHERS will think of them and their actions, they need to be true to themselves. So, if that means waiting 80 dates, and that makes them feel comfortable, I say good for you, but for those random, arbitrary "rules" that people have because their friends/aunts/cousins/books told them to wait, then I (personally) can't get with that, nor understand it. To each his/her own.
And I do know some forthright men who tell women up front of what they are looking for; right, wrong, or indifferent. They pull no punches and allow her to decide if she wants to "stay & play", or find someone else that is better suited for the type of relationship she may be looking for and expecting. The expectations are set up front, so there is no "Oh, I thought you were going to be my man since we got busy..." scenarios later.
I say it depends on the woman and the man. as simple as that it has to be a up front thing. never take advantage if a woman is down for some reason and just wants some one pass on it.
Bull,
I'm very happy you know me so well. Let's address this first. You dont think I'm honest with these girls? This is the dryest spell I've gone through since high school.
You know why? Cause I've walked away from a lot of girls without even just trying to get the poon-tang. Because of these following reasons - The girl gives off wanting a relationship vibe very early on, 2nd she desires it for the wrong reasons (rebound, fear of being alone) or lastly, being so in love with herself that it makes David Lee Roth have humility in comparison.
The first two have been the most common experiences for me. But these last couple of months #3 is racing up there like a bullet. I've said this time and time again. I dont consider myself to be anything remotely special in the looks department.
You put me up against guys like Gerard Butler, and he wins hands down no contest. But yet in some weird Twlight Zone way, I've consistantly drawn attractive women. Which I've now have labeled Lyle Lovett Law - Basically whereever you live, there is always that one hot girl with weird taste in guys. Coming to this realization early on has given me the strength to walk away (with Cap ex being the lone exception) from what have been miserable, toxic experiences/relationships.
If a girl happens to be exceptionally attractive, SOME of them think they're god's gift to men. Which leads them to not work on other crucial aspects such as personality, intelligence, and good bedroom skills. And that is usually why you see all these hot female celebrities get cheated on or dumped by their bf/husbands in the news. Are their bfs/husbands in the wrong for being too cowardly to break up and cheat? Absofrickkenlutely. BUT it does take two to tango.
Getting back on track, do I scream out to the girls "show me the p---y?" No of course not. Bull let put it to you this way. If a guy pulls the "where is this going?" talk at any time during dating it comes off as needy, creepy, and clingy to women. Which is why the women have to intiate it.
So I dont announce my intentions unless she asks what I'm looking for. When that does happen 90% of the time, usually it goes back to a comfy chair, lotion, and some good ole' girl on girl action on the net. Which is why having a one-off no chills but frills daylong cumfest with one of the taken/married women who like me is sounding more appealing every minute. Finished next post..
I'm very happy you know me so well. Let's address this first. You dont think I'm honest with these girls? This is the dryest spell I've gone through since high school.
You know why? Cause I've walked away from a lot of girls without even just trying to get the poon-tang. Because of these following reasons - The girl gives off wanting a relationship vibe very early on, 2nd she desires it for the wrong reasons (rebound, fear of being alone) or lastly, being so in love with herself that it makes David Lee Roth have humility in comparison.
The first two have been the most common experiences for me. But these last couple of months #3 is racing up there like a bullet. I've said this time and time again. I dont consider myself to be anything remotely special in the looks department.
You put me up against guys like Gerard Butler, and he wins hands down no contest. But yet in some weird Twlight Zone way, I've consistantly drawn attractive women. Which I've now have labeled Lyle Lovett Law - Basically whereever you live, there is always that one hot girl with weird taste in guys. Coming to this realization early on has given me the strength to walk away (with Cap ex being the lone exception) from what have been miserable, toxic experiences/relationships.
If a girl happens to be exceptionally attractive, SOME of them think they're god's gift to men. Which leads them to not work on other crucial aspects such as personality, intelligence, and good bedroom skills. And that is usually why you see all these hot female celebrities get cheated on or dumped by their bf/husbands in the news. Are their bfs/husbands in the wrong for being too cowardly to break up and cheat? Absofrickkenlutely. BUT it does take two to tango.
Getting back on track, do I scream out to the girls "show me the p---y?" No of course not. Bull let put it to you this way. If a guy pulls the "where is this going?" talk at any time during dating it comes off as needy, creepy, and clingy to women. Which is why the women have to intiate it.
So I dont announce my intentions unless she asks what I'm looking for. When that does happen 90% of the time, usually it goes back to a comfy chair, lotion, and some good ole' girl on girl action on the net. Which is why having a one-off no chills but frills daylong cumfest with one of the taken/married women who like me is sounding more appealing every minute. Finished next post..
The other thing you have to take into consideration Bull is a lot of men and women are so badly jaded from past relationships, a nice big O sounds uncomplicated in comparison.
I'm not ruling out getting into a relationship, but their work/college schedule has to mesh with mine where time spent together is more than once a week.
Otherwise a relationship is a waste of time. Bottom line, the women I attract are always hardcore ambition-obsessed workaholics who do not know how to balance their work and personal lives. If my mom who's a career woman can do it, there is no excuse. It's all about schedule compatibility for me.
Believe me, if I didnt have financial responsibilites and a relative to take care of, the slackage would be a bit higher. I'm not a materialistic person,. I'm driven only to the point of wanting a permanent (non travelling the contry freelance) respectable desk job to pay the bills. Since I dont plan on having kids this strategy works well for me.
What works for me may not work for everybody else. But at least I'm honest about it and go to bed with a clear conscience.
BTW FWB can be done as long as you adhere to these rules. Dont look for a "mental" connection with a potential FWB partner. Mental connections brings the clingy. The only conenction yoo should be looking for is between your pants/panties. Two Dont see them all the time, space it out like once a month. Dont put your eggs in one basket, have at least 3 options going on. Attachment doesnt come so easily when you got a plan b and c. Lastly be upfront about it not going past the booty call stage at the very beginning.
This is why i wish I lived in LA. That town aint nothing but FWB.
I'm not ruling out getting into a relationship, but their work/college schedule has to mesh with mine where time spent together is more than once a week.
Otherwise a relationship is a waste of time. Bottom line, the women I attract are always hardcore ambition-obsessed workaholics who do not know how to balance their work and personal lives. If my mom who's a career woman can do it, there is no excuse. It's all about schedule compatibility for me.
Believe me, if I didnt have financial responsibilites and a relative to take care of, the slackage would be a bit higher. I'm not a materialistic person,. I'm driven only to the point of wanting a permanent (non travelling the contry freelance) respectable desk job to pay the bills. Since I dont plan on having kids this strategy works well for me.
What works for me may not work for everybody else. But at least I'm honest about it and go to bed with a clear conscience.
BTW FWB can be done as long as you adhere to these rules. Dont look for a "mental" connection with a potential FWB partner. Mental connections brings the clingy. The only conenction yoo should be looking for is between your pants/panties. Two Dont see them all the time, space it out like once a month. Dont put your eggs in one basket, have at least 3 options going on. Attachment doesnt come so easily when you got a plan b and c. Lastly be upfront about it not going past the booty call stage at the very beginning.
This is why i wish I lived in LA. That town aint nothing but FWB.
Let me give you some background on my "dry spell" I live in a college town. So the majoriTy of women there are 18-20 yo's. They still view relationships with rose-colored glasses. Because a majority of them are rich kids who dont have to balance 40 hour work weeks with school like kids in other college towns do.
Of course, I'm going to have a dry spell because it's younger women. If you go anywhere else like say, New YOrk City, Miami, LA, even Scottsdale, FWB are the norm not the minority.
Because most of those cities have a higher concentration of single late 20-to MID 30 year old's. And most of them are career focused. They dont have time for relationships. Or they've been through enough bad relationships to be weary of going into another one.
The other thing to take consideration is the fact I live in the south. There's going to be more of a conservative attitude towards dating than the east or west coast. Even though a majority of the men and women here cheat on/dump their spouses for someone else like getting new rolls of toilet paper.
Ironically most of the women I'm friends with only do FWB. They dont sit there and just use vibrators. They've had to break it off because the men were getting attached.
You cant generalize all women Bull. Some can't do FWB. Some can. I guess my problem Bull is the post comes across like your standards for dating should be that way for everyone else.
If that works for your life fine. But its not fair to throw hellfire and brimstone at everyone else.
Of course, I'm going to have a dry spell because it's younger women. If you go anywhere else like say, New YOrk City, Miami, LA, even Scottsdale, FWB are the norm not the minority.
Because most of those cities have a higher concentration of single late 20-to MID 30 year old's. And most of them are career focused. They dont have time for relationships. Or they've been through enough bad relationships to be weary of going into another one.
The other thing to take consideration is the fact I live in the south. There's going to be more of a conservative attitude towards dating than the east or west coast. Even though a majority of the men and women here cheat on/dump their spouses for someone else like getting new rolls of toilet paper.
Ironically most of the women I'm friends with only do FWB. They dont sit there and just use vibrators. They've had to break it off because the men were getting attached.
You cant generalize all women Bull. Some can't do FWB. Some can. I guess my problem Bull is the post comes across like your standards for dating should be that way for everyone else.
If that works for your life fine. But its not fair to throw hellfire and brimstone at everyone else.
Sorry Bull, I didnt have my contacts on either.
Just noticed that the last couple of posts were by Let IT bE. So my apologies for misdirecting my response when it's actually to Let It Be.
Just noticed that the last couple of posts were by Let IT bE. So my apologies for misdirecting my response when it's actually to Let It Be.
Why would my friends lie to me? I'm a scorp and regardless of how you feel about them, my bs detector is super high.
Let It Be you are generalzing that all women want a relationship by doing it in the fwb context. Do some women do it that?
Yes I agree, they do. BUT other women can have sex like a guy. Even though astrological charts cant 100% define a person, let's go in this context for a moment.
I used to be roommates with a girl who had a Taurus Sun, Aquarius Moon, Mars In Gemini, Venus In Aries. She's an extremely hot girl. She plays the field exactly like a man. She can have her pick of decent eligible guys if she wanted a relationship.
But she values her freedom too much to be tied down even in her late 20's. She would be with 3 different guys in a week. And she would discard them immediately after sleeping with them.
I know most guys can be terrible lovers so that is why women turn to vibrators. But after a long period of time some gals want the real thing no matter how bad it potentially could be.
Please dont use the threat of STD's to generalize all women only use vibrators when they are single. Most women as they get older realize they're not immune to STD's being in a relationship given how a lot of men cheat.
The only thing a woman can do is make sure that every time she does the deed is to play it safe.
I realize trying to get you to see all women dont function the same when it comes to dating is like arguing with a mollusk. There's no point.
The only thing I can say is something you already know. Go out and make friends with as many younger women as possible. I realize that sounds like a contradiction given the previous post about younger women. But I was talking about them in terms of the region. There are plentey of younger women esepcially on the west coast that date like a man.
You may realize then that all girls especially younger may not share the same values as women younger when it comes to dating.
Let It Be you are generalzing that all women want a relationship by doing it in the fwb context. Do some women do it that?
Yes I agree, they do. BUT other women can have sex like a guy. Even though astrological charts cant 100% define a person, let's go in this context for a moment.
I used to be roommates with a girl who had a Taurus Sun, Aquarius Moon, Mars In Gemini, Venus In Aries. She's an extremely hot girl. She plays the field exactly like a man. She can have her pick of decent eligible guys if she wanted a relationship.
But she values her freedom too much to be tied down even in her late 20's. She would be with 3 different guys in a week. And she would discard them immediately after sleeping with them.
I know most guys can be terrible lovers so that is why women turn to vibrators. But after a long period of time some gals want the real thing no matter how bad it potentially could be.
Please dont use the threat of STD's to generalize all women only use vibrators when they are single. Most women as they get older realize they're not immune to STD's being in a relationship given how a lot of men cheat.
The only thing a woman can do is make sure that every time she does the deed is to play it safe.
I realize trying to get you to see all women dont function the same when it comes to dating is like arguing with a mollusk. There's no point.
The only thing I can say is something you already know. Go out and make friends with as many younger women as possible. I realize that sounds like a contradiction given the previous post about younger women. But I was talking about them in terms of the region. There are plentey of younger women esepcially on the west coast that date like a man.
You may realize then that all girls especially younger may not share the same values as women younger when it comes to dating.
soerry i meant "women your age when it comes to dating."
I'm just assuming you're talking about the anal thing in sarcasm. Because I'm one of the few men that actually find anal sex disgusting. And men that are hardcore about wanting anal sex obviously are trapped in the closet.
Let it be, my problem is your viewpoint comes across like women are victims all the time in terms of sexuality in general. That women can't just be filthy and horny minded as men.
Case in point your allusion to my friend being a hooker. You talk about values, but weren't you just generalizing earlier that all women share the same values in terms of dating? My ex roommate is a up and coming model. She travels cross the country for photoshoots, shows all the time. She has little time to maintain a relationship. At least she is honest about it instead of being with someone that hardly ever sees her. The way she cuts the guys loose is questionable. But even I agree with men sometimes you have to be a b--ch about it.
I'm sorry, but not all women need flowers and the whole shebang to want to do the deed. They can be total horndogs like the rest of us. It is just a lot of women hide that fact out of fear of being judged by others like yourself.
I hope it comes sooner than later that our society stops holding double standards for women and sex. Or more likely women get more courage just to not give a sh-t.
Let it be, my problem is your viewpoint comes across like women are victims all the time in terms of sexuality in general. That women can't just be filthy and horny minded as men.
Case in point your allusion to my friend being a hooker. You talk about values, but weren't you just generalizing earlier that all women share the same values in terms of dating? My ex roommate is a up and coming model. She travels cross the country for photoshoots, shows all the time. She has little time to maintain a relationship. At least she is honest about it instead of being with someone that hardly ever sees her. The way she cuts the guys loose is questionable. But even I agree with men sometimes you have to be a b--ch about it.
I'm sorry, but not all women need flowers and the whole shebang to want to do the deed. They can be total horndogs like the rest of us. It is just a lot of women hide that fact out of fear of being judged by others like yourself.
I hope it comes sooner than later that our society stops holding double standards for women and sex. Or more likely women get more courage just to not give a sh-t.
look at 'Toes stirring the pot again... 😄
I know a girl who has probably fucked on every first date she's been on. Most of the time she doesn't care if she talks to them again or not. Sometimes she intentionally gives them the wrong number or fake name. but SOMETIMES she decides she wants a real relationship and tells them "let's get married and have babies" while fucking on the first date. Then is seriously let down when it doesn't work out. Poor dudes think she should be institutionalized I'm sure.
She has no idea. I feel bad for her. :/
I know a girl who has probably fucked on every first date she's been on. Most of the time she doesn't care if she talks to them again or not. Sometimes she intentionally gives them the wrong number or fake name. but SOMETIMES she decides she wants a real relationship and tells them "let's get married and have babies" while fucking on the first date. Then is seriously let down when it doesn't work out. Poor dudes think she should be institutionalized I'm sure.
She has no idea. I feel bad for her. :/
Why are people so worried about FWBs and whatever else is going on in the dating world, if it doesn't directly concern them?
What kills me is when they start to blame FWBs for the decrease in quality men lol That is just ridiculous. Don't blame young women for the fact that you can't find a decent man!
Things really aren't any different than they ever were. Different packaging is all.
What kills me is when they start to blame FWBs for the decrease in quality men lol That is just ridiculous. Don't blame young women for the fact that you can't find a decent man!
Things really aren't any different than they ever were. Different packaging is all.
"A vibrator is real and no different than a mans penis that dies when it cums. Another fact."
lol!
You can't be serious.
lol!
You can't be serious.
Posted by CancerLeoCam
To add... IMO, it seems the dating landscape has become so rife with disingenuous, wishy washy and manipulative folks that both men and women have a hard time getting to really realize when someone good DOES come along and they think themselves out of a great potential partner/relationship. Pretty sad.
I totally agree! I myself had come to a bad place like that fairly recently. I was so disheartened with men in general that I didn't want anything to do with them. Through meeting some really nice men lately who I have become friends with I know that I can't let myself become that "bitter" woman that generalizes all men because I could miss out on someone special. I am learning to be "choosier" though and definitely more careful about the type of men that I date. I am not currently with anyone exclusively but I am keeping my options open and have stopped the "man bashing" I was doing....lol.
I know there are still good men out there but the most important thing is loving yourself and really knowing yourself so that you don't "settle" and so you don't let yourself be disrespected or be made to feel uncomfortable with your own wants, needs and boundaries. I am just doing stuff that I love in the meantime and hanging out with wonderful friends!
I Asked my guy friends, they said if they are REALLY into the girl, they can wait. They said the three date rule is lame and he wants more than a girlfriend. lol
Who said you had to have a date?
Just fuck him silly and then tell him to GTFO!
He wont be able to stop thinking about you, guaranteed!
Im just kidding btw!
Sorta!
lol
Just fuck him silly and then tell him to GTFO!
He wont be able to stop thinking about you, guaranteed!
Im just kidding btw!
Sorta!
lol
To add... IMO, it seems the dating landscape has become so rife with disingenuous, wishy washy and manipulative folks that both men and women have a hard time getting to really realize when someone good DOES come along and they think themselves out of a great potential partner/relationship. Pretty sad.
Oh so true and so sad when you look at it. This has been my situation more than once unfortunately.
I've heard of the 3 date rule and it seems so farfetched to me. I mean, sure you can learn a lot about a guy in three dates, but not enough, IMO. Kissing is one thing, but sex, I'd have to wait like a month. And even then, I'd have to gauge how comfortable I am with him. I try not to worry about time limits, but it's often around the same time that I start to feel comfortable doing anything.
A year to know each other is just fine. Everyone has there own comfort level though I suppose.
if the feeling is right, then i'll do it. There is really no timing on these things
Wow long time since I've been on here at all let alone lurked.
Just to clarify Kylee, all I've ever said was if your values worked for you fine. Wonderful good for you. As long as it makes you happy.
BUT at the same time, just because women share different values than you doesnt mean they're to be judged either.
When you're 17-22, sex can be overly romanticized. Not that there's anything wrong with that. I did it in my early 20's. But as you get older, what you want out of life and relationships in general will change. That is why its not a good idea to be in a committed relationship till your 30's. You are not 100 % concrete on what you want.
I'm sorry but fear of STD's is lame and a cop out for not having sex when single. You're not gonna be safe in a relationship either from stds. For a couple of reasons.
One, your new hypothetical bf could've contracted an STD without knowing it before the relationship became exclusive. Therefore, he could transmit his std to you when having sex.
Two, people cheat regardless of gender. I've seen male and female friends that got STDS from their cheating partner. A lot of people say "Oh, my bf/gf would NEVER DO THAT"
But guess what, its not as simple as that. One night a bf/gf out at a party or hanging out with friends at a bar plan only to have a good time. But too much drinking can lead to lapses in judgment. And one thing leads to another till they wake up naked in the sheets with no memory of what happened. And not knowing if a condom was used.
The key thing with safe sex is this. Do your homework and research the best sources of protection on the market. Dont put yourself in a situation where you're not completely there mentally speaking aka being drunk/high. Find a guy/girl that is responsible in their promiscuity when single. If they dont seem like they GTFA from them stat.
I think it is important whether you are a guy or girl to have at least more than one sex partner. Now if 2 is enough that is fine. The problem with saving your virginity to that special someone is there is nothing to compare it to. And I dont care how in love you are with someone, eventually curiosity will emerge. You're gonna wonder how it is with someone else. And people with zero sexual experience will do one of two things. Either dump their significant other to get a taste of what is out there. Or like in my city, just cheat on them.
Finished next po
Just to clarify Kylee, all I've ever said was if your values worked for you fine. Wonderful good for you. As long as it makes you happy.
BUT at the same time, just because women share different values than you doesnt mean they're to be judged either.
When you're 17-22, sex can be overly romanticized. Not that there's anything wrong with that. I did it in my early 20's. But as you get older, what you want out of life and relationships in general will change. That is why its not a good idea to be in a committed relationship till your 30's. You are not 100 % concrete on what you want.
I'm sorry but fear of STD's is lame and a cop out for not having sex when single. You're not gonna be safe in a relationship either from stds. For a couple of reasons.
One, your new hypothetical bf could've contracted an STD without knowing it before the relationship became exclusive. Therefore, he could transmit his std to you when having sex.
Two, people cheat regardless of gender. I've seen male and female friends that got STDS from their cheating partner. A lot of people say "Oh, my bf/gf would NEVER DO THAT"
But guess what, its not as simple as that. One night a bf/gf out at a party or hanging out with friends at a bar plan only to have a good time. But too much drinking can lead to lapses in judgment. And one thing leads to another till they wake up naked in the sheets with no memory of what happened. And not knowing if a condom was used.
The key thing with safe sex is this. Do your homework and research the best sources of protection on the market. Dont put yourself in a situation where you're not completely there mentally speaking aka being drunk/high. Find a guy/girl that is responsible in their promiscuity when single. If they dont seem like they GTFA from them stat.
I think it is important whether you are a guy or girl to have at least more than one sex partner. Now if 2 is enough that is fine. The problem with saving your virginity to that special someone is there is nothing to compare it to. And I dont care how in love you are with someone, eventually curiosity will emerge. You're gonna wonder how it is with someone else. And people with zero sexual experience will do one of two things. Either dump their significant other to get a taste of what is out there. Or like in my city, just cheat on them.
Finished next po
It is up to you what to do in terms of the future. If you honestly feel holding out for sex is something worthwhile go ahead. Just dont advocate/judge it to be the way of living for everyone else.
People are too judgemental in terms of sexuality in this country period. Everyone has their own unique set of circumstances. Just live your life and not worry about someone else's.
PS . In terms of FWB, my argument about fear of stds is applicable to this subject as well. Just be safe, and honest about your intentions with partners. You dont necessarily have to have more than one f buddy either. Just try not to have any commonalities with them other then wanting to f--k their brains out. And keep the hookups to once in a while rather than recurring.
I was mainly saying having more than one option for those like myself who have a high sex drive when single.
People are too judgemental in terms of sexuality in this country period. Everyone has their own unique set of circumstances. Just live your life and not worry about someone else's.
PS . In terms of FWB, my argument about fear of stds is applicable to this subject as well. Just be safe, and honest about your intentions with partners. You dont necessarily have to have more than one f buddy either. Just try not to have any commonalities with them other then wanting to f--k their brains out. And keep the hookups to once in a while rather than recurring.
I was mainly saying having more than one option for those like myself who have a high sex drive when single.
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