@roamingfree
15 Years1,000+ PostsGemini
gah! i hate valentines!
my message didn't load:
wait for it. darn.
it has got to be the holiday that attracts the most horrible shit to me: found on I was cheated on, broke up, dumped, assaulted and now this:
so all was well. things were all fine. he's talking engagement, places he looked at to get married and all.
and than yesterday we get into an argument about I don't even know why, he was grumpy for some time, and I asked him at one point: you don't really want me to come, do you? (-- I was supposed to be on a plane this Wednesday to see him for a few days) and his answer is: "I don't know"
and I'm like: "seriously? you don't know? do you know if you actually want to be with me?"
and he says: "I don't know"
and I'm like: "are you serious? why are you stringing me along? why am I making this effort and spending money on this if you don't even know if you want to be with me? do you even know if you love me?"
and he says: "I don't know. I don't know what I want"
and I asked: "do you want to be by yourself?"
and he said: "I think so. I don't know"
and so I started to be really upset and than we hung up. I cried it out. Called him back after I calmed down and asked: "why are you doing this?"
he said: "I don't know what I want, but I love you and I mean it."
than we talked it out.
He still wants me to come, but I feel like: why bother? why am I going to travel all day from one country to another to see someone who doesn't know if he wants to be with me?
We talked again, he called today after I didn't get an answer back to my one text, since he texted me, i replied and never heard again, he said he didn't want me to feel ignored, and I said to him: "you know if I come, you and I will need to talk this out?" He agreed.
WTF? Why am I even going there?
I hurt so much yesterday. Felt like part of me got ripped out.
If someone else would say this happened to me, I would tell the girl: "move on lady, he's not worth it."
I feel like just going through motions right now. Things changed. I don't know how to fix it, or even if I should think about fixing this, because if a man wants a woman, he KNOWS he wants a woman.
I feel like I will go there, we will talk it out, but it will be it. The end.
I know that I could just say he's depressed, his ptsd is kicking in high gear, he's still getting over his divorce and taking time, just moved again, all this stuff... but really? How much can I pawn onto other reasons than him actually not wanting to be with me genuinely. What the hell am I doing with him than? gah.... men.
i'm going to post this with Sags, I doubt they will give me any other advice than: "move on girl, he's not into it", but maybe I need to get into his head and hear all the devils advocates
:/
that would be my advice to anyone and everyone in this situation... :/
yeah, I give that advice too... :/
I think I'm venting more and need to talk shit out, than advice. Things will not feel the same again. This I know. :/
I don't get how a 39 year old man can be so wishy washy... he loves me, he doesn't know, he loves me, he doesn't know... wtf—
I got up extra early this morning and grabbed the boy and the girl out of bed and brought them into the bedroom and laid them down on our bed. My wife was sound asleep even after all that, so i went and got the cat, the dog already sleeps in the room. So i had everyone in bed and just wanted my wife to wake up with all of us there. She wakes up and sees all of us in the room and I whispered Happy V Day....and her smile was wider than the Grand Canyon....She scanned the room and saw that we were one big old funny family. I cant believe I get to hug and see all of them every morning.
Thats how my valentine's day started.
Who am i kidding? I dont have a wife or kids.
I got up and came to work like millions of others, then tonight ill go home and watch Jeopardy.
I miss university and picketing Valentine's Day. We just found a "cause" in everything, lol
Love the depressed girl laying in bed in the background. lol.
Posted by wgamador2
Love the depressed girl laying in bed in the background. lol.
I saw her too. I was wondering if she really agrees with the fabricated love idea on the shirt her friend is holding. Fabricated or not, she could use a flower and a smile.
meh, everybody wants some body, you all are vday scrooges 🙂
Bah Humbug!
Posted by wgamador2
Love the depressed girl laying in bed in the background. lol.I saw her too. I was wondering if she really agrees with the fabricated love idea on the shirt her friend is holding. Fabricated or not, she could use a flower and a smile.
click to expand
I will pass on both to her for you, lol
Not really a scrooge. V-day is fine.
I just realized I didn't reply earlier when I read this. I wasn't trying to derail your thread. I am sorry for your experience and I would too say "Move on girl, he's not into it" but you know that already. This is one of those times when your heart just doesn't want to listen to your head. Sometimes it is very hard to think objectively when it is your relationship. Everything gets jumbled up and you start trying to rationalize and justify things. A man will not be that wishy washy regardless of his age. You are right again, when we want something we go after it.
Anyway, since these pictures make me smile... Happy Valentine's Day!
gawd LibraSid, so here I am nodding and agreeing with you in my head, but after we talked last night he opened the floodgates about deploying again and so, I will go see him tomorrow, we will spend some time, but I will give him all the space he is not asking for yet. Deployments wreck havoc on all. anyways - I'm nodding here and aggreing with you and than I see the monkey's butt and burst laughing so hard I had coffee come out of my nose - thanks 😄 ROFLMAO!
I miss university and picketing Valentine's Day. We just found a "cause" in everything, lol
Love the depressed girl laying in bed in the background. lol.
click to expand
rofl!! reminds me of me 😆 lololol I dunno why, but I just died a little
I got a call from my secret admirer
And...?
Posted by Amandus
And...?
Sorry - no saucy details to relay😢 Just an old flame I bumped into recently.
Actually it is an incredible study in chemistry - we have not seen each other for over a decade and once he realized who I was (obviously I am much older now and he thought I would be all gnarled and wizened) his face just lit up.
It was the Mastercard look - "priceless"!!
anyways, I"m on a plane to see the man himself today. We talked some things out. I wonder what these next few days will bring.
Posted by ReallyNiceAriesPerson
Sorry - no saucy details to relay😢 Just an old flame I bumped into recently.
Actually it is an incredible study in chemistry - we have not seen each other for over a decade and once he realized who I was (obviously I am much older now and he thought I would be all gnarled and wizened) his face just lit up.
It was the Mastercard look - "priceless"!!
Ah, thats cool actually.
ya'll killed my thread, buggers!
>:/
Posted by roamingfree
ya'll killed my thread, buggers!>:/
CLEAR!!!!!
Posted by roamingfree
ya'll killed my thread, buggers!>:/
I'll revive it!!
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IF you lov? th? Guy go him And be with hum
LOL!!!!
Love it!!!
Oh Ralph, I always wanted to cuddle him and give him a cookie and a smooch.
Posted by venusianbull
Oh Ralph, I always wanted to cuddle him and give him a cookie and a smooch.That lucky Ralphie.
*sigh*
click to expand
Awwww *snuggling ze Fishy*. Chocolate chip or peanut butter? 🙂
Excellent choice. 🙂 They must be criss-crossed with a fork before baking.
They are the best. 🙂 Grandma's recipes too.
ROLF!!
you all are hilarious 😄
thank you 🙂
well, I went to see him, we had a fantabulous time! Every minute of it. All is good, we looked at places and such to get married at, we talked a lot - or rather not that much, we both want to and so there is not much to really discuss, 🙂. He's stressed out about deployment and so has a lot on his plate, but refuses for us to stop and such. I love this dude and so will continue. Thankfully, I have all of you to be neurotic and so he can't see my temporary madness about him 😄.
Wish me luck - I found my mutually satisfying weirdness in him.
"We're all a little weird.
And life is a little weird.
And when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall into mutually satisfying weirdness - and call it love - true love."
~Robert Fulghum, True Love
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gah! i hate valentines!