Relationships are easy PT. 2

Relationships are easy PT. 2

People think problems and communication issues are a drag, but they are simple forks nothing more. Pride and glory, now that is the issue, but i don\'t have any of those nasty little buggers.


*Awaits for the people that were making fun of me the last time i said this unbelievable notion of good relationship*

I don't think effective/good communication over pro-longed periods of time are quite as simple. Things change, people change, circumstances come up. It's hard enough as it is for someone to continually love, respect & take care of themselves, let alone another person.

HOWEVER, I do believe that people make it seem that having a good relationship with effective communication is impossible & that's just simply wrong

I don\'t think effective/good communication over pro-longed periods of time are quite as simple. Things change, people change, circumstances come up. It\'s hard enough as it is for someone to continually love, respect & take care of themselves, let alone another person.

HOWEVER, I do believe that people make it seem that having a good relationship with effective communication is impossible & that\'s just simply wrong

True, but that way out is very easy for them, and its usually the most challenging, and this is where irritation increases and understanding fails within the mix of communication and anger.

Ex: A couple who both enjoy the outdoors, who both agreed (with no regret) of having no children, and they both work as teachers will be more likely to get along far more than a couple who work in a completely different setting such as

Ex2: a man who enjoys hanging out with his friends, and loves to express PDA but he isn\'t much of love maker because he be mentally involved with his woman, and he enjoys talking about very bizarre conspiracy theories while his wife has a PHD in astrophysics, so she thinks her husband\'s theories are stupid, she doesn\'t like to make out in a large setting because she is very reserved, but she rather express herself in the sack because she loves the aggression of sex, but she never gets it because her man rather talk to her in bed, which she doesn\'t want to hear...

So the guy is hurt because his wife thinks that he is a nut-job for believing in the videos that weirdos make on youtube, and she is feeling lonely that her husband rather spend time with his buddies discussing his stupid ideas than have crazy wild sex with her, so both he and she become angry toward each other (but this is a progression).

If it isn\'t broke don\'t try to fix it.

click to expand

Yup, but people have expectations, and everyone demands somebody who can mold into everything they want without thinking about molding into what their spouce wants.

I see it this way, if you are a swinger then be with a swinger not a reserved lover who becomes enraged by the idea of you even flirting with other women or vise versa.

If you are reserved and you rather watch tv all day then find somebody who does too.

There are a bundle of reasons, although i say it is easy, there are problems that arise even with me on my personal values, morals, and traditions that are challenged by my lady.

I agree relationships arn't complicated, it is people that are complicated. such as ones who come to the relationship acting a certain way, but there is only so long they can keep up the act.

You might think you have found someone just like you e.g you are both doctors both are career minded and have decided not to have children, but then a couple of years down the line one was only a doctor because their parents made them do it and really wants to be a writer, actually loves children and wants to travel the world!

It's not that love itself is complicated. People in general are complicated. That's why people tend to struggle keeping up effective communication with friends, family members, associates, etc. There are many different types of love; relationships b/w a man & a woman aren't the only type of love that can be challenging.

1. Most people don't know which things to prioritize vs. which things to let slide if need be. Some people are either too picky OR the complete opposite & always settling all the time. Some people ask for or seek the things they really don't want or aren't ready for, while others who actually get exactly what they wanted are never satisfied.

I think it's ok for couples to be different in some aspects. They shouldn't have to be damn near twins just to get along. BUT, we all know deep down inside what's important to us & what's not. Some people just need to learn how to accept differences in certain areas instead of freaking out every time they notice their partner is different from them in some way. People also need to learn the value of compromise. Picking your battles is very important too.

EVERY relationship will hit a rough patch. That's inevitable & will remain true regardless of how compatible or not 2 people are. It's how they communicate during those rough patches that can really make/break a relationship.

Plus, people like to ignore the things they can't stand about another person, up front b/c they like keeping their heads in the clouds. If you're outgoing & if you know good & damn well that you'd want a companion that's just as outgoing, don't go be with the 1 person who just so happens to be super introverted. Don't go & be with that person, stay with them for 5 years & then out of the blue, jump up & claim "things aren't working out." Alot of the things people complain about in their relationships nowadays are the things they saw from the beginning.

^^ Interesting, thanks for the input.

hmmm you have a point there, lol a few points to be exact.

Hahaha, thanks. I try to cover as much as little as possible haha.

You might think you have found someone just like you e.g you are both doctors both are career minded and have decided not to have children, but then a couple of years down the line one was only a doctor because their parents made them do it and really wants to be a writer, actually loves children and wants to travel the world!

This has happen to a few people i worked with in the past. Also, there men or women that have been in long term relationships that come to realize that they are gay, or they come out years later when they think there parents wouldn\'t reject of their choice, and they have to break the news to their spouse.

And last, the cross-dressers; they are just as subjective as the gays or even worse.

But I\'m going a bit overboard, but thanks for the input guys! 😄

The person you married at 20 might not be the same person you are still married to at 30 or 40 or beyond. People do change as they grow up. But the 2 people will need to accept each other with the changes or it won't work 'forever'.

'EVERY relationship will hit a rough patch. That's inevitable & will remain true regardless of how compatible or not 2 people are. It's how they communicate during those rough patches that can really make/break a relationship.'

Absolutely.

Growing apart can happen. Even with communication. Sometimes 2 people no longer want the same thing in life.

IMO, who would want someone 'just like us' but maybe that's just me,lol.

My 1st serious relationship lasted 5years..I was soo young then.
Married 14 years then divorced.
Been with S/O 10 years this coming summer.