When you don't trust the bond you share with someone

How do you deal with it? It is hard to explain but with some people I have seen no matter what whether you meet often or not, whether you are looking nice that day or not, whether you are with someone else or not, they are always the same with you. And you are secure in the knowledge that even if we meet after years we can share the same rapport. But with others it depends on the day and time. Like one day the person makes time for you shows interest in you and next they are ignoring you when there is someone else in front. Or one day you are dressed nicely and you see them interact with you more and then another they hardly have any time for you. I am not talking of romantic interest alone but when you start believing your friendship with someone based on their actions and then they turn around and turn around yet again, how do you deal with the confusion? Does it happen to you?

I call people like that Fair Weather friends.

Only they're not friends.

They are users of the first order.

And greedy.

Posted by Montgomery
I call people like that Fair Weather friends.

Only they're not friends.

They are users of the first order.

And greedy.

But some of them also are not evil but just don't show consistency in emotions.

I just haffun till it lasts.

Posted by Teena
I just haffun till it lasts.

But what if the consistency is not guaranteed from day to day. I mean not that we can always do something about it but you feel lost like why this persons behavior keeps changing? And it is not necessarily changing because of things between you but due to things they are having with others haha you just feel like wth.

Posted by tiziani
Maybe the relationship depends on more than just two people to make it work. Sometimes I've been in that situation. We're also attracted to one another sometimes for the strangest illusions.

But I wouldn't think about it too much. As long as I'm spending the majority of my time around company where I feel at ease, it's cool.

Yes, it's odd because some days you feel so relaxed and at ease with the person, and another you are not sure if they are in the mood to talk to you at all because they are spending more time with someone else. It's like who they talk to more depends on who they are interacting with more lets say for work or whatever.

Posted by tiziani

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by tiziani
Maybe the relationship depends on more than just two people to make it work. Sometimes I've been in that situation. We're also attracted to one another sometimes for the strangest illusions.

But I wouldn't think about it too much. As long as I'm spending the majority of my time around company where I feel at ease, it's cool.

Yes, it's odd because some days you feel so relaxed and at ease with the person, and another you are not sure if they are in the mood to talk to you at all because they are spending more time with someone else. It's like who they talk to more depends on who they are interacting with more lets say for work or whatever.

Yep. I've been through a few triangles like that - not that I ever noticed at the time. But you look back in retrospect and you can become more aware of your attraction to them.

click to expand

haha there is actually a diagram for it. great.

Posted by caIiber
Easy peasy lemon squeezy. Don't consider them friends. No confusion to deal with when they don't have your attention in the first place.

I wish it is easy to do this.

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by Teena
I just haffun till it lasts.

But what if the consistency is not guaranteed from day to day. I mean not that we can always do something about it but you feel lost like why this persons behavior keeps changing? And it is not necessarily changing because of things between you but due to things they are having with others haha you just feel like wth.

click to expand

Happened with me.. Usually with Geminis(nothing to do with sunsigns...but it's been a pattern)I was surprised n infact taken aback when I was much younger. But I eventually became cool with that. I kinda turned like that tbh. I do very well with aquaintanices now. I can be deeply attached to you n be your best friend this moment n go back to not knowing you the next(not turning cold necessarily) . I wouldn't bother or even notice more often than not if people do that to me.Now, to me, It's all about making moments n cherishing them.You won't believe how much I cherish the little things even when I haven't been around a person for too long. Like Tiz said, it's all about feeling at ease when we are with them.

Posted by tiziani

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by tiziani

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by tiziani
Maybe the relationship depends on more than just two people to make it work. Sometimes I've been in that situation. We're also attracted to one another sometimes for the strangest illusions.

But I wouldn't think about it too much. As long as I'm spending the majority of my time around company where I feel at ease, it's cool.

Yes, it's odd because some days you feel so relaxed and at ease with the person, and another you are not sure if they are in the mood to talk to you at all because they are spending more time with someone else. It's like who they talk to more depends on who they are interacting with more lets say for work or whatever.

Yep. I've been through a few triangles like that - not that I ever noticed at the time. But you look back in retrospect and you can become more aware of your attraction to them.

haha there is actually a diagram for it. great.

If you ever have free time for more, I'm not often a fan of Liz Greene's writing but I think this is really good and possibly near to what you're looking for:

http://www.skyscript.co.uk/lgreene.html#ut

click to expand

That looks interesting, thank you. Have you felt this in friendships too? A friend being nice to you when in need and then nice to someone else rest of the time because they are more popular or of the opposite sex? You shared good times at one point so the friendship label is there to stay but you slowly start moving away.

Posted by puhleeze
How do you deal with it? It is hard to explain but with some people I have seen no matter what whether you meet often or not, whether you are looking nice that day or not, whether you are with someone else or not, they are always the same with you. And you are secure in the knowledge that even if we meet after years we can share the same rapport. But with others it depends on the day and time. Like one day the person makes time for you shows interest in you and next they are ignoring you when there is someone else in front. Or one day you are dressed nicely and you see them interact with you more and then another they hardly have any time for you. I am not talking of romantic interest alone but when you start believing your friendship with someone based on their actions and then they turn around and turn around yet again, how do you deal with the confusion? Does it happen to you?

Well in terms in friendships in general, it could be that the person is a moody person. This isn't for everyone but for me personally, I know my interactions with people differ with how I feel. For example, if I'm having a really bad day, feeling stressed or have a lot of things on my mind, I feel like I'm less able to give someone else my full attention and presence in the moment. I am aware that sometimes they might think that I don't like them or something.

Posted by Teena

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by Teena
I just haffun till it lasts.

But what if the consistency is not guaranteed from day to day. I mean not that we can always do something about it but you feel lost like why this persons behavior keeps changing? And it is not necessarily changing because of things between you but due to things they are having with others haha you just feel like wth.

Happened with me.. Usually with Geminis(nothing to do with sunsigns...but it's been a pattern)I was surprised n infact taken aback when I was much younger. But I eventually became cool with that. I kinda turned like that tbh. I do very well with aquaintanices now. I can be deeply attached to you n be your best friend this moment n go back to not knowing you the next(not turning cold necessarily) . I wouldn't bother or even notice more often than not if people do that to me.Now, to me, It's all about making moments n cherishing them.You won't believe how much I cherish the little things even when I haven't been around a person for too long. Like Tiz said, it's all about feeling at ease when we are with them.

click to expand

It is really nice to be able to stay detached but do you think it might be hurting people who take your friendship seriously? I am totally okay with not talking regularly, not seeing each other but I know that these are the people I don't have to worry about connecting with at any point or who I know that when I meet them or run into them we are going to have same connection.

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by Montgomery
I call people like that Fair Weather friends.

Only they're not friends.

They are users of the first order.

And greedy.

But some of them also are not evil but just don't show consistency in emotions.

click to expand

Don't think I mentioned evil-- but if you choose

to remain friends with people who are nice to

you only when you look good, thats your

business.

If calling it "inconsistent emotions" makes you

feel better, then fine... but that isn't the truth.

"Like one day the person makes time for you shows interest in you and next they are ignoring you when there is someone else in front.

Or one day you are dressed nicely and you see them interact with you more... "



Reposting the heart of the OP for the skimmers

out there.

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by Teena

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by Teena
I just haffun till it lasts.

But what if the consistency is not guaranteed from day to day. I mean not that we can always do something about it but you feel lost like why this persons behavior keeps changing? And it is not necessarily changing because of things between you but due to things they are having with others haha you just feel like wth.

Happened with me.. Usually with Geminis(nothing to do with sunsigns...but it's been a pattern)I was surprised n infact taken aback when I was much younger. But I eventually became cool with that. I kinda turned like that tbh. I do very well with aquaintanices now. I can be deeply attached to you n be your best friend this moment n go back to not knowing you the next(not turning cold necessarily) . I wouldn't bother or even notice more often than not if people do that to me.Now, to me, It's all about making moments n cherishing them.You won't believe how much I cherish the little things even when I haven't been around a person for too long. Like Tiz said, it's all about feeling at ease when we are with them.

It is really nice to be able to stay detached but do you think it might be hurting people who take your friendship seriously? I am totally okay with not talking regularly, not seeing each other but I know that these are the people I don't have to worry about connecting with at any point or who I know that when I meet them or run into them we are going to have same connection.

click to expand

It might yes. But it's not like I didn't take their friendship seriously ...not at all. I really really love you n I'm really your goddamn bestfriend before that. I wasn't pretending or faking to be your friend. I'd care for you, I'd listen to you, I'd do things for you, I'll prioritize you over myself, I'll be there whenever.. everything. N I don't ever plan to leave you to start with trust me. I'm not detached at all till that point.I really still continue loving you in my head after it's over... reminiscing all the moments we shared, writing them down, saving all the possible memories n stuff. But when it has to be over, it should be.I'll love them forever from far. I dunno if that made any sense at all?

Posted by tiziani

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by tiziani

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by tiziani

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by tiziani
Maybe the relationship depends on more than just two people to make it work. Sometimes I've been in that situation. We're also attracted to one another sometimes for the strangest illusions.

But I wouldn't think about it too much. As long as I'm spending the majority of my time around company where I feel at ease, it's cool.

Yes, it's odd because some days you feel so relaxed and at ease with the person, and another you are not sure if they are in the mood to talk to you at all because they are spending more time with someone else. It's like who they talk to more depends on who they are interacting with more lets say for work or whatever.

Yep. I've been through a few triangles like that - not that I ever noticed at the time. But you look back in retrospect and you can become more aware of your attraction to them.

haha there is actually a diagram for it. great.

If you ever have free time for more, I'm not often a fan of Liz Greene's writing but I think this is really good and possibly near to what you're looking for:

http://www.skyscript.co.uk/lgreene.html#ut

That looks interesting, thank you. Have you felt this in friendships too? A friend being nice to you when in need and then nice to someone else rest of the time because they are more popular or of the opposite sex? You shared good times at one point so the friendship label is there to stay but you slowly start moving away.

Hmm I can't say I relate to that specifically, no. But in general I relate to the sentiment behind your thread. I also see a big part of learning, for me years ago, was just accepting people are never attracted to me for the reasons I used to build up in my own head. At that point it's easier not to think about it, and certainly easier not to take it personally - either in the good times or the less good.

click to expand

+1000. I wish to get there where nothing is personal.

Posted by Teena

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by Teena

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by Teena
I just haffun till it lasts.

But what if the consistency is not guaranteed from day to day. I mean not that we can always do something about it but you feel lost like why this persons behavior keeps changing? And it is not necessarily changing because of things between you but due to things they are having with others haha you just feel like wth.

Happened with me.. Usually with Geminis(nothing to do with sunsigns...but it's been a pattern)I was surprised n infact taken aback when I was much younger. But I eventually became cool with that. I kinda turned like that tbh. I do very well with aquaintanices now. I can be deeply attached to you n be your best friend this moment n go back to not knowing you the next(not turning cold necessarily) . I wouldn't bother or even notice more often than not if people do that to me.Now, to me, It's all about making moments n cherishing them.You won't believe how much I cherish the little things even when I haven't been around a person for too long. Like Tiz said, it's all about feeling at ease when we are with them.

It is really nice to be able to stay detached but do you think it might be hurting people who take your friendship seriously? I am totally okay with not talking regularly, not seeing each other but I know that these are the people I don't have to worry about connecting with at any point or who I know that when I meet them or run into them we are going to have same connection.

It might yes. But it's not like I didn't take their friendship seriously ...not at all. I really really love you n I'm really your goddamn bestfriend before that. I wasn't pretending or faking to be your friend. I'd care for you, I'd listen to you, I'd do things for you, I'll prioritize you over myself, I'll be there whenever.. everything. N I don't ever plan to leave you to start with trust me. I'm not detached at all till that point.I really still continue loving you in my head after it's over... reminiscing all the moments we shared, writing them down, saving all the possible memories n stuff. But when it has to be over, it should be.I'll love them forever from far. I dunno if that made any sense at all?

click to expand

Maybe it does. But why does it have to be over if you love them?

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by Teena

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by Teena

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by Teena
I just haffun till it lasts.

But what if the consistency is not guaranteed from day to day. I mean not that we can always do something about it but you feel lost like why this persons behavior keeps changing? And it is not necessarily changing because of things between you but due to things they are having with others haha you just feel like wth.

Happened with me.. Usually with Geminis(nothing to do with sunsigns...but it's been a pattern)I was surprised n infact taken aback when I was much younger. But I eventually became cool with that. I kinda turned like that tbh. I do very well with aquaintanices now. I can be deeply attached to you n be your best friend this moment n go back to not knowing you the next(not turning cold necessarily) . I wouldn't bother or even notice more often than not if people do that to me.Now, to me, It's all about making moments n cherishing them.You won't believe how much I cherish the little things even when I haven't been around a person for too long. Like Tiz said, it's all about feeling at ease when we are with them.

It is really nice to be able to stay detached but do you think it might be hurting people who take your friendship seriously? I am totally okay with not talking regularly, not seeing each other but I know that these are the people I don't have to worry about connecting with at any point or who I know that when I meet them or run into them we are going to have same connection.

It might yes. But it's not like I didn't take their friendship seriously ...not at all. I really really love you n I'm really your goddamn bestfriend before that. I wasn't pretending or faking to be your friend. I'd care for you, I'd listen to you, I'd do things for you, I'll prioritize you over myself, I'll be there whenever.. everything. N I don't ever plan to leave you to start with trust me. I'm not detached at all till that point.I really still continue loving you in my head after it's over... reminiscing all the moments we shared, writing them down, saving all the possible memories n stuff. But when it has to be over, it should be.I'll love them forever from far. I dunno if that made any sense at all?

Maybe it does. But why does it have to be over if you love them?

click to expand

Now that,my friend, is something I can't really answer. I dunno... they are not supposed to last probably.

Posted by Montgomery
"Like one day the person makes time for you shows interest in you and next they are ignoring you when there is someone else in front.

Or one day you are dressed nicely and you see them interact with you more... "



Reposting the heart of the OP for the skimmers

out there.

haha yes, you feel naive because you are thinking oh we have a strong connection and then next day wait what happened. Again another day yes the connection is still there. It's actually periods of time rather than every other day. What I can take from this after re-reading what I wrote is that the person who is the most consistent in demeanor in your life is the type that is worth having forever in your life.

Posted by Teena

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by Teena

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by Teena

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by Teena
I just haffun till it lasts.

But what if the consistency is not guaranteed from day to day. I mean not that we can always do something about it but you feel lost like why this persons behavior keeps changing? And it is not necessarily changing because of things between you but due to things they are having with others haha you just feel like wth.

Happened with me.. Usually with Geminis(nothing to do with sunsigns...but it's been a pattern)I was surprised n infact taken aback when I was much younger. But I eventually became cool with that. I kinda turned like that tbh. I do very well with aquaintanices now. I can be deeply attached to you n be your best friend this moment n go back to not knowing you the next(not turning cold necessarily) . I wouldn't bother or even notice more often than not if people do that to me.Now, to me, It's all about making moments n cherishing them.You won't believe how much I cherish the little things even when I haven't been around a person for too long. Like Tiz said, it's all about feeling at ease when we are with them.

It is really nice to be able to stay detached but do you think it might be hurting people who take your friendship seriously? I am totally okay with not talking regularly, not seeing each other but I know that these are the people I don't have to worry about connecting with at any point or who I know that when I meet them or run into them we are going to have same connection.

It might yes. But it's not like I didn't take their friendship seriously ...not at all. I really really love you n I'm really your goddamn bestfriend before that. I wasn't pretending or faking to be your friend. I'd care for you, I'd listen to you, I'd do things for you, I'll prioritize you over myself, I'll be there whenever.. everything. N I don't ever plan to leave you to start with trust me. I'm not detached at all till that point.I really still continue loving you in my head after it's over... reminiscing all the moments we shared, writing them down, saving all the possible memories n stuff. But when it has to be over, it should be.I'll love them forever from far. I dunno if that made any sense at all?

Maybe it does. But why does it have to be over if you love them?

Now that,my friend, is something I can't really answer. I dunno... they are not supposed to last probably.

click to expand

hmm I think I can relate a bit where some friends I have stopped talking to gradually because we just are very far away from each other, but in my heart they are my friend and I think about them from time to time. You just lose touch with some as you move away. That I can understand. Not sure if that is the case for you though.

I think most people are inconsistent. It's just human nature. We have emtions. Emotions come and go and we feel different every second.

Posted by Montgomery

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by Montgomery
I call people like that Fair Weather friends.

Only they're not friends.

They are users of the first order.

And greedy.

But some of them also are not evil but just don't show consistency in emotions.

Don't think I mentioned evil-- but if you choose

to remain friends with people who are nice to

you only when you look good, thats your

business.

If calling it "inconsistent emotions" makes you

feel better, then fine... but that isn't the truth.

click to expand

Look good is one example, but there are times when you are working together and that makes you interact more or get used to each other. Then there are times when you don't have to work together and you see them talking less with you. Talking less is also not the problem, sometimes ignoring you when in front that is the problem. And by that I again don't mean like literally ignore you but you can tell that the bond that was there before is less now.

Posted by whatisthisallabout
I think most people are inconsistent. It's just human nature. We have emtions. Emotions come and go and we feel different every second.

Yes I think the key here is not to get too attached to anyone. Be happy with your own company.

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by Teena

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by Teena

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by Teena

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by Teena
I just haffun till it lasts.

But what if the consistency is not guaranteed from day to day. I mean not that we can always do something about it but you feel lost like why this persons behavior keeps changing? And it is not necessarily changing because of things between you but due to things they are having with others haha you just feel like wth.

Happened with me.. Usually with Geminis(nothing to do with sunsigns...but it's been a pattern)I was surprised n infact taken aback when I was much younger. But I eventually became cool with that. I kinda turned like that tbh. I do very well with aquaintanices now. I can be deeply attached to you n be your best friend this moment n go back to not knowing you the next(not turning cold necessarily) . I wouldn't bother or even notice more often than not if people do that to me.Now, to me, It's all about making moments n cherishing them.You won't believe how much I cherish the little things even when I haven't been around a person for too long. Like Tiz said, it's all about feeling at ease when we are with them.

It is really nice to be able to stay detached but do you think it might be hurting people who take your friendship seriously? I am totally okay with not talking regularly, not seeing each other but I know that these are the people I don't have to worry about connecting with at any point or who I know that when I meet them or run into them we are going to have same connection.

It might yes. But it's not like I didn't take their friendship seriously ...not at all. I really really love you n I'm really your goddamn bestfriend before that. I wasn't pretending or faking to be your friend. I'd care for you, I'd listen to you, I'd do things for you, I'll prioritize you over myself, I'll be there whenever.. everything. N I don't ever plan to leave you to start with trust me. I'm not detached at all till that point.I really still continue loving you in my head after it's over... reminiscing all the moments we shared, writing them down, saving all the possible memories n stuff. But when it has to be over, it should be.I'll love them forever from far. I dunno if that made any sense at all?

Maybe it does. But why does it have to be over if you love them?

Now that,my friend, is something I can't really answer. I dunno... they are not supposed to last probably.

hmm I think I can relate a bit where some friends I have stopped talking to gradually because we just are very far away from each other, but in my heart they are my friend and I think about them from time to time. You just lose touch with some as you move away. That I can understand. Not sure if that is the case for you though.

click to expand

Mm-hmm.. Nope. That's not the case for me. I leave them even before something like that happens(coz I usually can't take the formal partings..too much pain) or even if something like that happens or not.Maybe I'm just about collecting memories. Moreover, till we remain friends, I'm only about giving for the most part.

Posted by themilkyway36

Posted by puhleeze
How do you deal with it? It is hard to explain but with some people I have seen no matter what whether you meet often or not, whether you are looking nice that day or not, whether you are with someone else or not, they are always the same with you. And you are secure in the knowledge that even if we meet after years we can share the same rapport. But with others it depends on the day and time. Like one day the person makes time for you shows interest in you and next they are ignoring you when there is someone else in front. Or one day you are dressed nicely and you see them interact with you more and then another they hardly have any time for you. I am not talking of romantic interest alone but when you start believing your friendship with someone based on their actions and then they turn around and turn around yet again, how do you deal with the confusion? Does it happen to you?

Well in terms in friendships in general, it could be that the person is a moody person. This isn't for everyone but for me personally, I know my interactions with people differ with how I feel. For example, if I'm having a really bad day, feeling stressed or have a lot of things on my mind, I feel like I'm less able to give someone else my full attention and presence in the moment. I am aware that sometimes they might think that I don't like them or something.

click to expand

I can deal with the mood part. That is understandable. But would you like talk to one friend over other when they are both in front of you? Like Tiz said maybe it is just about not taking things personally.

Posted by nanobyte
I am at my wits end dealing with "friends" like the one you describe in the OP. People are shitty, man. I have tried to cope with the fair-weather act for awhile now, but I think I'm just done.

Life is just too short to invite people into your life if you can't trust your relationship/bonds with them.

Wow I like the way you put it. Yes, I just want to scream and say to them hey I see your butterty behavior.

Posted by Teena

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by Teena

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by Teena

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by Teena

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by Teena
I just haffun till it lasts.

But what if the consistency is not guaranteed from day to day. I mean not that we can always do something about it but you feel lost like why this persons behavior keeps changing? And it is not necessarily changing because of things between you but due to things they are having with others haha you just feel like wth.

Happened with me.. Usually with Geminis(nothing to do with sunsigns...but it's been a pattern)I was surprised n infact taken aback when I was much younger. But I eventually became cool with that. I kinda turned like that tbh. I do very well with aquaintanices now. I can be deeply attached to you n be your best friend this moment n go back to not knowing you the next(not turning cold necessarily) . I wouldn't bother or even notice more often than not if people do that to me.Now, to me, It's all about making moments n cherishing them.You won't believe how much I cherish the little things even when I haven't been around a person for too long. Like Tiz said, it's all about feeling at ease when we are with them.

It is really nice to be able to stay detached but do you think it might be hurting people who take your friendship seriously? I am totally okay with not talking regularly, not seeing each other but I know that these are the people I don't have to worry about connecting with at any point or who I know that when I meet them or run into them we are going to have same connection.

It might yes. But it's not like I didn't take their friendship seriously ...not at all. I really really love you n I'm really your goddamn bestfriend before that. I wasn't pretending or faking to be your friend. I'd care for you, I'd listen to you, I'd do things for you, I'll prioritize you over myself, I'll be there whenever.. everything. N I don't ever plan to leave you to start with trust me. I'm not detached at all till that point.I really still continue loving you in my head after it's over... reminiscing all the moments we shared, writing them down, saving all the possible memories n stuff. But when it has to be over, it should be.I'll love them forever from far. I dunno if that made any sense at all?

Maybe it does. But why does it have to be over if you love them?

Now that,my friend, is something I can't really answer. I dunno... they are not supposed to last probably.

hmm I think I can relate a bit where some friends I have stopped talking to gradually because we just are very far away from each other, but in my heart they are my friend and I think about them from time to time. You just lose touch with some as you move away. That I can understand. Not sure if that is the case for you though.

Mm-hmm.. Nope. That's not the case for me. I leave them even before something like that happens(coz I usually can't take the formal partings..too much pain) or even if something like that happens or not.Maybe I'm just about collecting memories. Moreover, till we remain friends, I'm only about giving for the most part.

click to expand

Okay I don't understand then lol. But hey if you are happy that's what that matters then.

Posted by puhleeze

Posted by themilkyway36

Posted by puhleeze
How do you deal with it? It is hard to explain but with some people I have seen no matter what whether you meet often or not, whether you are looking nice that day or not, whether you are with someone else or not, they are always the same with you. And you are secure in the knowledge that even if we meet after years we can share the same rapport. But with others it depends on the day and time. Like one day the person makes time for you shows interest in you and next they are ignoring you when there is someone else in front. Or one day you are dressed nicely and you see them interact with you more and then another they hardly have any time for you. I am not talking of romantic interest alone but when you start believing your friendship with someone based on their actions and then they turn around and turn around yet again, how do you deal with the confusion? Does it happen to you?

Well in terms in friendships in general, it could be that the person is a moody person. This isn't for everyone but for me personally, I know my interactions with people differ with how I feel. For example, if I'm having a really bad day, feeling stressed or have a lot of things on my mind, I feel like I'm less able to give someone else my full attention and presence in the moment. I am aware that sometimes they might think that I don't like them or something.

I can deal with the mood part. That is understandable. But would you like talk to one friend over other when they are both in front of you? Like Tiz said maybe it is just about not taking things personally.

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Oh yeah if that's the case then I hate when someone does that too. Makes me feel like they're not as interested in talking to me. This happened to me last time I was hanging out with my group of friends after we haven't seen each other for a while. Felt kind of bad about it