Do I reach out to the Sag? I've got bad news 4 him

I created this account just to ask you sags...

This sag I'm obsessed with only texts me every 2-3 months to check on or see me. We have a history but we are not together. I think he cares for me more than just a piece of azz. Of course, i hate pining for him but its what i'm doing. (sigh)

Instead of waiting for him to text me, should i text him first and tell him what heavy stuff is going on with me?

How do u guy sags deal with your friend's bad news? In case, u r wondering, my mom was the victim of a home invasion 2 days ago. She was not hurt but the 2 guys kicked/busted 3 doors and freaked her the treetrunk out. Took a little cash and jewelry. I have more things to tell him too.


I don't know any other details about his chart, etc.

So you want to reach out to this guy out of comfort, when he clearly shows he doesnt do the same back. He only msgs you every cpl months to see if your still hanging around when he does want you..Instead if you want to talk about what happened, talk to people who truely care about you like your friends and family who are always there for you, not someone who decides to pop in whenever he feels like it.. when he does text you can tell him that stuff later...Don`t try and make someone your priority when you aren`t his..Your reaching out because you want some kind of reaction from him, because he isnt showing any interest other then having you hanging around. that won`t work hunny..

Posted by jessgoogoo
So you want to reach out to this guy out of comfort, when he clearly shows he doesnt do the same back. He only msgs you every cpl months to see if your still hanging around when he does want you..Instead if you want to talk about what happened, talk to people who truely care about you like your friends and family who are always there for you, not someone who decides to pop in whenever he feels like it.. when he does text you can tell him that stuff later...Don`t try and make someone your priority when you aren`t his..Your reaching out because you want some kind of reaction from him, because he isnt showing any interest other then having you hanging around. that won`t work hunny..

Agree 100%

No Problem, and with the heart ache issues of wanting him, all i can tell you is go out and see other guys, doesnt mean you have to date them, but this guy can`t be consuming so much of your time in your head...Slowly you will not think about him so much, any man who really cares or loves you won`t be so out of touch, you can move across the country and he would still be there..Best of Luck

I believe the OP asked for a Sag males advice so no offense but what's been said is ego and clouding the picture.

@OP:

The funny thing about what's been said so far is that he's actually trying to see if its ok for him to come back around. I don't know what happened between you two, but it was negative enough to cause you two to part ways. Ask yourself, would you go rushing back into a negatively charged situation? I guess not so why shoud it be any different for him? Because he's a man? That's how you make a situation worse and anybody who tells you different is just showing you their ego. The truth is usually both people are at fault for the break up because of how they react. People rarely think deeply about their actions. They just "do" and expect a different result. Him checking on you is to see if the situation has gotten more positive and for you to give him the signal that's it's ok to try again.

For me personally, I'd help. Not to try to get back in because if I still care it's a way I show it. If you've forgiven someone then the past belongs where it is. A clean start for both of you. Only the present. Of you want him to be your friend then both of you should drop your egos and see what happens.

Posted by jessgoogoo
No Problem, and with the heart ache issues of wanting him, all i can tell you is go out and see other guys, doesnt mean you have to date them, but this guy can`t be consuming so much of your time in your head...Slowly you will not think about him so much, any man who really cares or loves you won`t be so out of touch, you can move across the country and he would still be there..Best of Luck

You see right through me. 🙂

Posted by beautifulsoul74
I believe the OP asked for a Sag males advice so no offense but what's been said is ego and clouding the picture.

@OP:

The funny thing about what's been said so far is that he's actually trying to see if its ok for him to come back around. I don't know what happened between you two, but it was negative enough to cause you two to part ways. Ask yourself, would you go rushing back into a negatively charged situation? I guess not so why shoud it be any different for him? Because he's a man? That's how you make a situation worse and anybody who tells you different is just showing you their ego. The truth is usually both people are at fault for the break up because of how they react. People rarely think deeply about their actions. They just "do" and expect a different result. Him checking on you is to see if the situation has gotten more positive and for you to give him the signal that's it's ok to try again.

For me personally, I'd help. Not to try to get back in because if I still care it's a way I show it. If you've forgiven someone then the past belongs where it is. A clean start for both of you. Only the present. Of you want him to be your friend then both of you should drop your egos and see what happens.

Yes, its my pride in the way however, i find that he contacts/sees me only when he wants. I put him off sometimes and decline but he will keep trying to see me maybe a month or so later.
When i suggested to meet once, it went unanswered.

We don't have a negatively charged situation...i just want to know he cares and contact me more. Jgoogoo is right, i have news and want a reaction from him.

@GlamLeo:

He's aware that you're putting him off so he backs off waiting for you. He's probably saying to himself "I see she's still playing around so I'll check back later." He's not putting you off or trying to intentionally see you when he feels like it. He's leaving you to decide what it is you want because he's not going to force his way back in. Our schedules are filled with our interests and so when we call to see "what's up," we're genuinely trying to to go out with you but not right then. If we know you're playing games(and we do) we make you less of a priority and if you continue, we disappear altogether. You can always choose to do it differently. We know that others may see it another way so we present ourselves to show you we care. But we won't let you continually punish us.

Personally, I think you're interested in more than friends and he knows it. He may have been as well and actually tried but you did what you said above and he backed off. Thus you have what's going on.

As a sag, dont bring me no bad news. When people bring me bad news, I may dwell for 5 mins, but I would like to quickly move on. If a jumpoff called me with bad news, id think u had the wrong number.

The bad news doesnt even have ne thing to do with him. I think your just looking for an excuse to call hiim.

Posted by jessgoogoo
So you want to reach out to this guy out of comfort, when he clearly shows he doesnt do the same back. He only msgs you every cpl months to see if your still hanging around when he does want you..Instead if you want to talk about what happened, talk to people who truely care about you like your friends and family who are always there for you, not someone who decides to pop in whenever he feels like it.. when he does text you can tell him that stuff later...Don`t try and make someone your priority when you aren`t his..Your reaching out because you want some kind of reaction from him, because he isnt showing any interest other then having you hanging around. that won`t work hunny..

+1

Ive been n a situatiin like this and its reaching at best. Goo girl is right, youll soon 4get about him.

So this back and forth with the Sag has been goin on for 3-4 years. Last year I saw him only once. I decided that I can't/don't want to see him because I don't just want to be his jumpoff. He still checked in with me and i'd give him bad news to go away but he keeps coming around and now i've caught feelings since i saw him a couple weeks ago..
When I said i haven't seen u since last year, he acts like he doesn't track the time. "Oh has it?" Shrugs.

He is being straight up. If he saw you a potential gf, he'd be more attentive. But since he doesnt, he doesnt keep track of this or that.

Regardless, time to a sag is all relative. 8 hours in some office is a lifetime, but not seeing or talking to someone for days or weeks doesnt seem that long.

Posted by GlamLeo
So this back and forth with the Sag has been goin on for 3-4 years. Last year I saw him only once. I decided that I can't/don't want to see him because I don't just want to be his jumpoff. He still checked in with me and i'd give him bad news to go away but he keeps coming around and now i've caught feelings since i saw him a couple weeks ago..
When I said i haven't seen u since last year, he acts like he doesn't track the time. "Oh has it?" Shrugs.

U saw him only once last year? Girlfriend, come now.

I'm in the same shoes too. 2 months ago, i can't be able to see him everyday because of moving out. I miss him so badly. i asked him to meet me first. But his phone is not with him, so after a day he send back what's happen?


He used to abandon me if he see that i'm too stupid (I'm damp stupid and abnormal in front of him) even he promise to help me. He used to let me borrow his account for reading. I found out he change PW without letting me know. I'm a virgo, to me it's a pure no to friendship. I only have loyalty friends, that be with me no matter what, so I expect he will be a friend like that to me. But I don't know, he is my first male friend that i talk to a lot, and know me so personal like that. I'm kind of lack experience with boy considered i'm 26.


Then I decide to do like jessgoogoo say. I won't reply and contact anymore.

He send me message and one mail that kind of the area he think i'm interest. then I couldn't hold back anymore. so i reply and then he ask about my new house new life.

After he know, he never contact again.

But i kind of make fun of his opinion about his last traveling place in my last mail. i wonder if that's why he never reply me back or we have nothing to say anymore?

out of the fish out there, I wonder why i feel he is so important. Even sometime I feel so bored sitting with him.
I don't know should i text him again? Just like you he always pop in my head. I don't know what to talk to him but I want to tell him everything. I know it's your topic, and I sound like a highschool girl. But i hope some advice since we are on similar situation.

@Beautiful, u were right. I texted asking to talk and he called me within 5 min. Had a great convo with him and he def. cares about me. Tried to help and wants to take me to lunch.

Posted by GlamLeo
@Beautiful, u were right. I texted asking to talk and he called me within 5 min. Had a great convo with him and he def. cares about me. Tried to help and wants to take me to lunch.

_??_ I'm glad for you. It's that simple with us. If we don't care anymore, we wouldn't contact you at all but we're always willing to talk. I wish the best for you two. Good luck!